i omitted you from memory. my holidays were altered

without your blue beret and epaulets; i see now you

wear gloves to hide your treacherous fingers, the ones

that touch the betrayer softly on the cheek, the ones

that pass around the holy cup to your foe. i know you

think i do not catch that but i do and in my heart i

applaud your willingness to dabble in the sunlight

of a marksman's heart, that bright place of the

assassin. they all have a sunspot in the dark despite

their solemnity and politesse, and so, no inkling of

your artfulness, fortunately. for i cannot mourn now.

i am too young for sorrow and the pearls that are

my eyes are still lucent. i need to see into your future,

so that i will know mine. and i need to see my dreams.

the ones that shepherd me into that light. do i frighten

you, bismarck, you and your perpetually loyal heart?

i remove the devil from your mouth but it's claws are

impossible, they slather your lips with red. i suck at

my breath and fingers, the blood from under my nails.

i need a clean finger to point with, to indicate to you.

seasofme170117