Neal choked on his drink.

He was having a 'nice' family dinner with his father, son, and Belle.

Rumple clapped his back, trying to get him air while Belle and Henry, who was 11 going on 12, looked on in concern.

He gasped as he was finally able to breath again and choked "you're getting what?!"

Henry, unaware of his father's shock and slightly distressed state, answered him while beaming "They're getting married! Isn't it great dad? Belle's gonna be my grandma and your stepmom!"

Belle choked on her drink at the statement and smiled slightly "let's just stick to Belle for now" She looked at Rumple and Neal nervously, before looking at Henry. "Hey Henry, why don't we go get ice cream while your dad and grandfather talk?"

Neal made a move to protest but his dad and son were much quicker than him "that's a great idea Belle" Rumple said smiling warily .

"Okay!" Henry said at the same time, running off to get his shoes and jacket with Belle in toe— leaving the father-son duo to stare at eachother in awkward silence as Belle and Henry got ready.

Niether spoke until they heard the front door slam shut.

"Bae, I know this is a shock to you" Rumple started, only to be cut off by Neal snorting humorlessly.

"1, it's Neal. 2, ya think?!" He got up, wanting to be anywhere but here as several thoughts ran through his head.

His heart was racing and his eyes were watering, and his head was spinning.

His papa was getting married.

To a woman who wasn't much older than himself.

His papa was finally gonna have his happy ending but Neal couldn't be happy for him. Not when the little voice in the back of his head kept using his own fears against him.

Once his papa had another kid, what would he need him for?

He was the product of an unhappy marriage—this baby would be the product of a happy one with a woman who wouldn't leave it. His papa would surely forget all about him and Henry when that happened and he'd be alone again.

Oh God, he couldn't breathe.

Neal suddenly felt lightheaded as the world began to spin around him.

He couldn't breath, no matter how much he gasped and tried to get air in. Why couldn't he breathe? Black dots started to cloud his vision and his eyes began to water as his legs gave out from under him. Blood was rushing in his ears as he felt hands on him, causing him to thrash.

"Bae? Bae?! Baelfire?! You need to breath" Neal heard as he struggled to calm down. He felt a pair of arms wrap around him

"I-I can't—" he choked.

"Yes you can. Come on, focus."

Neal could feel something wet sliding down his face. When had he started crying? He tried not to focus too hard on that as he got his breathing back under his control.

"That's it. You got it. Shhh, it's okay" Rumple said softly, rubbing Neal's back gently—hugging him close. "Very good"

"I'm sorry" he rasped, burying his face in his father's shoulder.

"Don't be. It's okay. Just relax. Relax" Gold repeated, rubbing his son's back—utterly confused about what would cause such a reaction.

"What was all that about?" The older man asked concerned.

"Don't worry about it. It won't happen again. I just have to go get some shut eye" Neal said, brushing off his father's concern as he stood up-- shaking.

His dad pushed him back in his chair as soon as he stood up.

"Not yet you aren't. We need to talk about this" Rumple said sternly, summoning him a bottle of water, which he gladly took.

"No we don't " Neal replied, downing the water.

"Baelfire" Rumple said warningly.

"Fine" he sighed— too tired to argue, running a hand through his hair. "Talk."

"What happened?" Was the first question out of Rumplestiltskin's mouth.

He had never seen anything like that happen with his son before and he didn't want to feel as helpless as he had this time if it ever happened again.

"Panic attack " Neal replied, arms crossed staring at the wall; he was grouchy, tired, and would rather be anywhere else at the moment.

"Is this the first one you've ever had?" The dark one asked concerned, eyebrows furrowed.

"No. I've had them before. Thought I was over them."

"Have you been to therapy for it? Gotten any medication or potions that could help?" Rumple knew he shouldn't be pushing his son but he was worried and wanted to know if his son was getting help or not.

"No, no, and no" Neal answered exhausted, knowing that his father would find out if he wasn't truthful.

"Why not?" Gold asked indignantly, concerned for his son's health.

"Because a broke teenager on the run with no knowledge of the land without magic can't exactly waltz into a psychiatry office and expect to be given a free appointment. " Neal replied snarkily, trying not to slip back into those memories.

"Oh" was all Rumple could say as guilt overcame him once again.

He should have never chosen power over his son; Baelfire wouldn't have suffered as greatly had he not done so.

Neal sighed seeing the look on his face "papa, it's fine. That was a long time ago and I'm okay now" he tried to sound reassuring, but he was still out of breath.

"No it's not. It's not fine now and it wasn't then. You need help, Neal, and you can get it now—I'll pay for it" Rumple insisted.

"Papa, you don't have to do that—" Neal tried to protest, only to get cut off.

"Yes I do. I'm your father, It's my job and it's about time I start doing it again".

Neal smiled weakly at that, before thinking about it.

His father clearly wasn't gonna drop the issue now that he knew about it and he wouldn't put it past his father to get Henry or even Killian involved to get him to agree to go.

Not to mention that it would be nice to get some of the weight off his shoulders—something he hadn't been able to do since he and Emma were together. Plus it was nice to see that his father did care about him and his health still despite the fact that he was getting married.

"Okay. I will."

Rumple smiled and rubbed his back "Atta boy."