Zemira

Most people at the exhibition gawked at me as if I hopped out of a nude painting. 

To ease my nerves, Kiera interlocked our arms, escorting me around. Her caring husband, Jake, followed close behind, providing us with the necessary security.

"I don't understand anything." Keira pointed to a painting that had red and black squiggly lines emerging from the base of the canvas.

"What's not to understand?" I said. "It's focused on the dark matters of our lives that emerge from our inner self."

Both Jake and Kiera looked at me with unwired jaws. I moved closer to the painting, evaluating the broad strokes that carried a sheen under the bright lights.

"Or it can be the painter trying to narrate his state of high."

I knew the man attached to that voice. 

When I turned, Leonardo lent his hand out towards Kiera, his sight never leaving mine.

"If I may, Kiera, can I have my fiancée's company?" Leo said, making Kiera move into the graceful company of her husband.

It was difficult, damming the warmth from spreading across my face. An attempt to look away and allow my senses to realign failed when Leo tipped my chin up.

"You look splendid."

"Tell me something I don't know." 

He leaned closer, warm breath fanning the side of my face. His sweet scent penetrated every layer of my skin.

"Then how about this... You're the most beautiful sight in this whole room."

"More beautiful than that?" I pointed at the squiggly painting, trying hard not to blush.

"That, I apologize for. You see, my friend painted this at a café in Amsterdam, having assumed he was the next Van Gogh." Leo cringed his face. "I'm sure whatever he smoked there wasn't legal, to begin with."

After a brief pause, his grip grew stronger over my elbow. "Let's get out of here, Zem."

His airy words slipped from the back of my neck and braided into my spine. I turned to him, wide-eyed and mouth.

"What about the charity? After all, we are supposed to make an appearance for at least half an hour."

He kissed my knuckles, running his lower lips over the crests and troughs of it. His hooded gaze remained glued to me.

"We did make an appearance. Whoever had to see us, saw us. We'll make news by tomorrow. Now I'm telling you, the food here is crap."

"Let me guess," I curled my arms over my chest. "The chef who's serving tonight also smoked something illegal in Amsterdam?"

"No, he did that in Paris."

My teeth dug into my lips, barring another set of laughter from disturbing the silence. Not that I wanted to stay in a room full of pretentious snobs, but Leo's words convinced me to deviate from the schedule.

Bidding our adieu to Kiera was fun. She gave her blessings with hooked eyebrows before clasping onto Leo's elbow.

"Don't hurt her."

Leo raised his hands, letting out a dragged, weary sigh. "Why do you keep assuming I'm hurting her? For all you know, she's the one who pins me to the floor."

On cue, more heads turned, listening to his defense. 

I witnessed him scanning the marble flooring with his teeth digging into his lower lip.

"Fine," Kiera chuckled, leaving his side. "You kids have fun."

She winked at me, smiling at the intersection where Leo's arm interlocked with mine.

~

When we reached our apartment, Leo hopped onto the kitchen counter, tossing his shoes to the side while calling up someone.

"Pizza?" He looked at me and I nodded vigorously.

After placing orders, he hopped off the counter, moving close to where I stood. With ease, he loosened his tie. 

It was an assault on my vision, watching him in his natural state. All enticing.

"I have an idea," he said, tossing his tie on the countertop. "Get changed into your most comfortable clothing."

"That'd be my jammies."

"Jammies it is then." He smiled, unbuttoning his collar button and briefly closing his eyes. "Tonight, we'd eat and drink like college kids."

For the next half an hour, Leo went missing from the apartment. 

By the time I was done with a cold shower, he descended from the terrace, hopping off from the last stair with the enthusiasm of a child. My blue and pink bunny-printed sleepwear comforted my body as opposed to what I wore earlier; a dress that restricted my air supplies.

Leo lent out his hand and I took it. Only when his gaze shifted back to the stairs, air returned to my lungs.

The terrace was prepped with a comforter, beer cans and a few lit candles.

"Is this a candlelight dinner thing?" I asked, turning to him.

"No. Imagine there's no electricity and we are the only ones left on the planet."

"So an apocalypse occurred and we survived. But then who made the pizza?"

Smacking his forehead, Leo placed me on the bench, swaddling me with his comforter and falling beside me. 

"Switch off your logic button, Zem."

He pulled out two pizza slices and lent one to me. As I dug into the slice, the sweetness of tomatoes and the saltiness of pepperoni burst up, cradled with the silkiness of mozzarella.

"Oh, god." He let out a soft moan

"I know, right? I had a foodgasm."

Leo turned towards me, his jaws working in tandem while his sight rested on me. I felt tingles run over my skin.

"How bad were the men you've been with that all it took was a pizza slice to weaken you?"

"Very bad," I grinned, taking another big bite. "So bad that even a floret of buttered broccoli would make me come undone."

Leo leaned closer, coiling his hand around mine and taking a bite of the crust. My mouth dried, watching him chew slowly, smirking as he taunted me.

"People normally use cucumbers, Zem. I'm hearing about broccolis for the first time."

It took me a while to understand his implication. That's when I began burying him under cushions.

"Okay... okay... Sorry. Truce..." He held his hands up, panting for air.

"You have a dirty mind, Leo."

"And you have a dirty mouth," he said. Before I could toss the plush pillow on his face again, Leo shielded it. "Fine, you don't. You're a good girl who just happens to loovee broccoli."

Sticking my tongue out, I went back to the previous position, chomping on Alfredo's pizza and looking into the darkness. I realized it was the company that made the stillness of the surroundings feel magical.

"Are you liking this?" Leo gestured towards the setting.

I leaned into the bench, resting my back. "It's perfect."

Sliding closer, he coiled his arm over my shoulder, nesting me over his chest. In the silence of the night, marred by the distance sirens and hovering chopper, we gazed at the starless sky with the candlelights warming an otherwise cold and windy area.

"The last time we were here," Leo murmured. "...you asked me something profound."

Love was a topic I preferred not to discuss with many. With Leo, the familiarity I felt like a decades-old friendship, coerced me to speak.

"I wasn't thinking straight," I said, swishing my hand around, trying to conjure magic to make him forget that day. "I guess I was tired from the move. Or unpacking."

Leo pulled me closer, the warmth of his body quelled all the discomforts of the day. He tilted his head, meeting my eyes. The care of his simmering smile made me lean into his hold.

"I hope you know, I won't be running around and telling people your secrets." In his rumbled tone he said. "And I don't want to hide things from you either."

"Fine, what do you want to know?" I asked, turning to him.

Inches from his face, it was the first time I wasn't blinded by my hormones, tempting me to kiss him. For the first time, I wanted to sit in silence and listen to him speak.

"Anything." Leo straightened. "Let's start with why you asked me that question?"

As much as I wanted to, I couldn't muster up the courage to talk about Tag. Suppressed beneath layers of memories, Tag rested. Drudging it would only result in me falling back into a state of tears and breakdowns.

"It's just a generic question. An icebreaker. Anyways, what about you, Leo? Ever fell in love with someone?"

"No. I didn't." Loosening his grip, his body leaned away from mine. "I only do strings of one-night stands with girls I prey on at hotel bars."

Beneath the mask of humor, Leo too hid his pain. The pain of confessing about his past. 

We may have been two different people with different backgrounds but our hearts ached the same. Our longing for someone lost or left was the same. 

In a way, two different people were the same when it came to matters of love.

Clearing his throat, Leo rose and dragged me alongside. We walked to the edge of the terrace, watching the city dance away into shimmering lights beneath us.

"After our agreement is done, I hope we can still be friends, Zem. I want us to remain in each other's lives."

"I'd like that very much." Lending out my hand, I waited. "To four times F."

"What?"

"Fake fiancé but friends forever."

That classic smile, one which engulfed Leo's features, crinkling the corner of his eyes and wrinkling his forehead came on display. "Four times F it is, Zem Zem."

"Aww, you're the best, Leo Leo."

Pulled into his embrace, I was wrapped into his musky scent and strong yet caring hold. The effect danced over my skin and deep into my bones even in my room as I gazed up at the ceiling, smiling at the day we had.

We didn't have a brilliant start but our journey was getting better. I had a friend who cared for me in ways no other man did, except for one. 

~

As sleep washed over me, my heavy eyelids grew heavier.

"STOP." Leonardo's scream pushed me off my sleep, my bed. "PLEASE DON'T."

Tossing the door wide open, I darted into his bedroom. Twisting in his sleep, his hands grabbed the sides of the cover. His eyes were forced shut. His teeth clenched.

"Leo..." Patting his cheeks, I held his cold sweat laden face.

Bedcover clung to his sweaty body. His grip on them hardened to the point of ripping it apart. I had to think and act quicker.

"Sergeant Brenton," I called out in a calm voice, rubbing his clutched fists. I remembered Tag's letters, of his night terrors and PTSD. I had to ensure not to jolt Leo. "It's a dream. Nobody's hurting you."

Moments later, Leo's eyes sprang open. 

His body laid in a pool of sweat. His dilated eyes and ragged breath spoke of some distant, scary place he had been to. He scanned the room, gasping, grunting. Coughed out nothing yet choked on something.

I patted his face and rubbed his shoulders, pulling him up to face me. "You're at home, Leo. You're safe and fine. Nobody's hurting you... It's a dream."

Leo rubbed his face, wheezing. His palms rested on his dripping forehead. In a jerk reaction, he pulled me into his embrace, breathing over the top of my head.

"It was a... was a sleep terr... orr"

I ran circles over his trembling back. "But now you're out of it. Look around, you are safe, Leo."

He slipped from my hold, back on his bed while I sat witness to his vulnerable form. In a matter of a few hours, my fake fiancé turned friend displayed his lowest state of existence.

I was scared but not for him.

All this while I assumed Leo to be a perfect man but through the crack in his mask, I could see his flaws, his scars. His imperfection stirred something inside my chest that his picture-perfect self couldn't achieve. 

Something, I hadn't felt in ages.

~

Vulnerability speaks volumes...

Ever had a night like this, when gazing into the starless skies or into someone else made the night turn into the day?

Ever had a friend like this to share the silence?

Let me know :)