"Are you crazy?" he said to me remain calm waiting for me to crack in laugh but sorry it won't happen. "You are crazy." He finally shouting at me and begin to hit my back violently. "Throw it out! Throw that shit out!"

"Relax." I said try to prey his hand, but it's no use.

"Relax your ass!" he shouts again right now make some people around us look at us bothered. "You eat poison. You'll fucking die, and if you die there will be nothing left for me to live." He looks worried, sweat rolling down on his temple as he keeps on hitting my back.

"With or without this poison I'll going to die in no time anyway." And he stops as he watches me. "Long time ago, I did ever scare to die without having family, had a good life, good memory. But then, I just realized it was too good to happen to me. I'll just do what God want to happen to me. I already tired running from them, tired to try to taste the happiness."

And my system slowly reacting to the pill that I eat.

"I took the husband of my friend. The first time, I could feel something again in here after you shut it down." I touch my chest as the pain increased. "And he said he loves, he loves me, Kai. You should know how happy I was to know the fact that someone choose me over someone else." I close my eyes as it blurred. "And we fight together, up and down we taste together. And I believe that if we love each other like that no one could tear us apart. How stupid I am." I chuckled at my stupidity.

I can feel my hand and feet begin to be cold, and it's trembling so badly.

"Doll."

"But then she is pregnant, Kai. Jennie unnie is pregnant with his child." My voice cracked as I am breaking down in front of him. He willingly took me in his embrace, and then I can feel my body lifted. I heard someone opening the door, and then Kai put me on the passenger seat of his car. The sound of the engine makes me nervous. "She carried what he wants." I cry painfully, a hand reaching for mine, caressing my hand gently. "Love can't save me, and him." I speak again but it's begun to become a whisper right now. "There's nothing left for me to live."
--

She doesn't want me anymore.

And I can't do nothing to coming back to her. This is all my fault. I was too caught off at the moment where I felt disappointed at her, because she doesn't want to have baby with me. I was too egoistic, never thinking from her side. And here I am. Sitting down among Kim's family who is eagerly choosing the name for the baby inside Jen's womb.

The angry Mr. Kim right now all smiley when I showed up, talking nothing but be by Jen's side.

Our final hearing already had cancelled.

And I can do nothing but surrender toward anything life want to punish me with.

God punish me for my greediness. To never feel enough after he gave me someone precious like Lisa, for not be patient to wait for her to be ready, for only thinking about me. He punishes me with something that I really want in my life, a baby. But right now, instead of happiness I am more like zombie with no feeling. No matter how many times the Kim want me to focus on what they say, my heart keeps on screaming for Lisa nonstop. And I am dying because of that.

"You bastard what's on your mind?" Jimin hyung screaming loudly on my ear after he smack my face and make me fall to the ground. "All this time I can only think that you only love Lisa, make me always hating Lisa for her push and pull and here you are Jeon Jungkook." He grabs me by the collar and glare at me angrily. "Look at you! You happy? You happy, jerk?" he punches my face again and I have no will punch him back because I deserve all this treatment.

"Enough, Jim." Said Jin hyung from behind him. I am coughing hardly as I taste my blood, I spit it out.

"Look at you right now, who's going to be by your side huh? Who's going to save you? You are standing all alone right now. Congratulation." He grabs my chin, and then grinning at me before throwing my face down. "You happy?"

"I don't know." I said softly as I look up at him. "I can't feel anything. But the pain in my head."

"You deserve that. You betray Lisa."

"It's not my intention, hyung."

"That's what an asshole would say." I look away to see Taehyung with his poker face on, watching me intently. "I should've never let Lisa get close to you." He is still calming, but I know that he is angry. "Anyway congratulation, I'll take care Lisa from now on-"

"You won't do that." I angrily spat at him when my heart boiled with a blinded feeling called jealousy. I can't imagine Lisa will be happy with anyone but me. We love each other, we were okay together.

"Huhh." Taehyung snorting and smirking at me, walking slowly to reach me. "Don't ever dream to have her back again after what you did to her." He spells out. "I'll take her away, far away from you."

"Don't." I said as I feel fear slowly creeping in me. I was about to beg to Taehyung hyung when suddenly, someone's hand phone ringing.

"Hello, it's Kim Seokjin speaking." I look at him as his face hardened while watching me and I had a bad feeling for that. "What's happening Dr. Im?" that's Lisa's doctor. "How the hell she-"anger was so sure in every word that Jin hyung spoke right now. I try to stand up when Jin hyung walking with a long step exiting the dorm. "Keep her safe, I'll be there."

"Hyung." I said half running to reach him, but then he is entering his car. I knock on the door. "Hyung, please tell me it's not what I think." I scream when he starts the engine. "Hyung, I beg y-"

"I'll kill you with my own hands if she dies." and Jin hyung never threatening for real.