Arthit's POV

I feel numb now-a-days . I never knew Numbness can also be considered as a feeling till now. I don't have interest in anything.

I sent my resignation to the company. I don't want to work anymore . I don't want to eat . I don't want to do anything other than gaze off to the fields which seen through my balcony.

I don't even want to go inside the bedroom as it seems so dull. I feel like everything that happened in that room till last week was fake.

All the past feels like it happened wins ago. The first meet , the courting , the ignorance , the fights , the persistence , everything.

How did he leave this ?

The life we built for past 14 years. Is there no meaning for all these things that happened. Ain't all these worthy enough ? What happened to you Kong , that you couldn't share with me ?

For the first time in days I stepped into our bedroom . I still feel his cologne on the bed , I fall on it and held his pillow to me tightly . It is warm like he used to be . Though he calls me his Sun he's my warmth. After what felt like yours my eyes went to our closet .

I walked upto it and saw all his suits . It reminded me of our daily routine I hugged all of them in my arms and was crying again.

I seem to forget what's day and what's night all I can think about is him. Him . HIM.

I took his favourite suit and put that on me. It's crisp and I felt like his arm is around me . I snuggled deeper into it while I sat on bed . Suddenly there's something that touched my fingers when I put my hands in the pocket .

I flinched immediately. No matter how I think that all this is not real I still felt like there's something that I was not supposed to know. And this object is also making me nervous .

I dont want to open it , yet I can't stay stil . So I did.

It's a printed letter. Though it's a bit crumpled. I opened and started reading it.

What
Why
How
When
Why

Lately I feel like my life , my mind , my existence everything is just a list of questions. Every turn i take there's only a question that's waiting for me .

Then it clicked. M.

M is Kongpob's best friend basically he became mine too. And now I think about it . I didn't see him even once after funeral of Kongpob.

Wait.

I think I didn't see him even then only his parents.

Where's he ? Why did Kong mention about him ? Does he know something?

I called him immediately but it's switched off.

I suddenly stood and wanted to go meet him . Maybe I can get some answers.
I won't be able to drive so I took a taxi a d sat in it with various emotions in my heart .

If I can I'll go back to past, and make sure that I'll never go out of the hazing practice hall . Then all this would never happen.

AN : Next all chapters will be of past flashbacks . The next 6 will be alternate chapters of past and present.

Later the story reveals and Kong's pov will follow.