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27| Jungle Book

She walked a snaky gait to the uninvited guest nd brightly greeted him with offensive words. "Oh, it's the same fucker from the past!" She shoved a finger in his chest harsh enough to make him stumble at the contact. "I must take your autograph!"

"Y/N—" Jin sternly held her by the waist in one place to prevent getting more such physical attacks while I discreetly watched their family drama. I need some popcorns too.

"For fuck's sake, I'm not Y/N and he's my husband!" Her hands ran to grab my collar and before she could pull me down to kiss me, I stopped her.

"No—" I desperately called for help but I didn't ask Jin to save me yet he did by pulling her off me. I wanted to express my gratitude to him but I knew what drunk Y/N could've done to me if I thanked him so I chose to stand like a dummy.

"Yeah, his wife. But my Y/N was same too. She was always weird but she was the weirdest when she was drunk." He looked down at Y/N's flushed face purposely as if he had a faint idea of our fake act. "Y/N would've never met your standards, Mr Kim. Even though yours is eerily similar to my wife, mine was highly intolerable."

Scratch that, he's definitely saying this to insult her.

She tried to hide behind my back from the extreme embarrassment. "Excuse me? Don't you dare say such things about my wife." I warned him with a hope that he'll excuse himself and get lost after this.

"Yea, don't ya dare to say such things about my wife, I mean his wife." Yeah, with this the dumbest person of the year officially goes to Y/N.

Jin still dared to say something even after my stern warning. "Oh, c'mon—"

"Why would I cum for you, bitch—" I was quick to shove her face in my chest, in a way which might have looked like I was hugging her but, honestly, I was just trying to shut her mouth.

"Your wife curses a lot... Isn't that weird for a woman with 5 year old kids at home?" He put me in a tight spot by asking that question. I hoped on all the stars to save me and fortunately, his phone rang before I could reply. "I'm sorry, I'll be back in a sec."

Please don't!

Just when Jin turned around to attend the call, a car stopped in front of us and Jungkook stepped out brushing his hair back. "Hey, people! Who's he—Jin...?" Jungkook's facial expression changed from 'sexy' to 'shocked' to 'what the fuck'.

I quickly pushed Jungkook back in the car and rapped out words. "Don't say anything and just drive us away. Quick, quick QUICK!" I raised my volume with every 'quick' I spoke and Jungkook confusedly shut the door. Y/N stood unfazed. "Hey, Y/N, you need some special invitation?! Get inside!"

I continued dragging Y/N and opened the door for her and almost pushing her in. "It wasn't nice at all meeting you, bitch." She shouted at Jin. Jungkook helped me shoving her in the backseat. "Oh hey Jungle book !"

"Jungle book? Seriously? Y/N, I hate you for spoiling my name." Jungkook felt quite hurt at the serious abuse of his name. While they had their own laughter session, I glared at Jin who looked at us with shock of getting betrayed.

I smacked Jungkook's head and he instantly hit me back as a revenge. And then it hit me, He's not the 10 year old Jungkook who respected me too much and would've quietly tolerated me. "Move, move, MOVE!"

"I'll, you don't have to hit me for that. I'm already quite upset ever since she called me Jungle book." He frowned before shifting the gear and bringing the car in motion.

"Whatever. Would you like to see how we kiss?" Y/N shrugged and leaned forward even after my shameless attempts of stopping her by all means.

"Y/N, Sit back quietly." I covered her face with my huge hand to pushed her back in her seat. "He didn't say yes."

"I am saying that now. Go, Y/N!" Jungkook cheered for her. At some miracle, she actually listened to me and sat back quietly in the backseat. "What the hell is actually happening?" Jungkook questioned as soon as I closed my eyes. "She is drunk, Jin was here and now she's wild."

"Can we have a moment of silence?" I murmured with an added depth to my tone to make Jungkook quiet.

He applied brakes too sharply and I wondered what went wrong in his brain that caused a sudden change of expression on his face. Somewhere between horror and happiness, he asked "What!? Who died!? Donald—"

"It would be you if you didn't shut your mouth." The exasperation my voice held against every little thing worked wonders on Jungkook and he stayed silent.

"I see you having a wild night with her in the near future." He quickly added. It didn't really take a foreseer to guess that.

For the rest of the ride, soft music lowly played on the radio while Y/N peacefully dozed off in the backseat. As soon as Jungkook pulled into the driveway for my home, I jumped out of the vehicle and walked my way to the entrance already. "Hey, don't you think you're forgetting your paid wife in the car? Damn, did she throw up in my car!?" Jungkook walked away from the car in disgust.

"Ah, yeah, her. There's a tiny problem here." I pretended as if I wasn't about to ask him to do me the weirdest favour. "I haven't been gyming lately so...I can't pick her up. Wanna help me?"

"Hell to the no, dude. At least not with that thing dripping from her mouth—Oh, my God! I'm about to puke, take her away." Jungkook ran in the rose bushes and I could hear him crying in pain moments later.

I sighed and gazed down at Y/N. You look beautiful—wait, I didn't notice that drool but anyways. "Time for some heavy weight lifting," I said to myself.

After several tries and with Jungkook's help, I managed to give her piggyback without tripping with Y/N on my back.

After laying her down on our bed, I filled a glass with water. She back hugged me just when I took a sip of water which was not a good idea. This may seem cute but I jumped in the air, shocked at the sudden touch while almost spilling out all the water. "You thought I slept?" She let out a really scary voice which didn't fail to give me goosebumps. Was she converting into a witch?

"Y/N, don't try to kiss me again. Your behaviour is making me wish I never suggested going out." I cried internally recalling the happenings of a day that seemed longer than any other day.

"I concluded that you are a bad kisser and you didn't wanna reveal that so you didn't respond. I'll leave this childish act too." She said in a bored voice. Deciding to ignore her, I went towards the washroom until I sensed her shadows following me. I decided to close the door for precaution.

"Shoo!" I shouted hoping that it would work on her the same way it did on Yeontan.

Suddenly she stopped the door from closing by sticking her foot in between rather sexily. "Make it quick, we will try something new." She said smirking.

••••

A/N:- Hey ya, ppl!
The fact that this book had many Donald Trump jokes and now that he's voted out, they won't remain funny is making me nervous. I always gave this writing tip: if you want to be funny and compare someone to a weird creature, write Donald Trump and if it's about numbers, when you can't come up with anything, write 69. No wonder why my book has so many 69s... Stay healthy and happy!

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