MACY

If someone told me months ago that I would be spending my entire Saturday in a hospital with Axel and his family, worrying about their well being, I would have laughed on their face. Matter of fact, I would have probably tried to punch the sense into them thinking that I would have rather spent my time at home, taking care of my pregnant mother's needs.

But, that wasn't the case and unfortunately, I spent my entire Saturday in a hospital waiting room since they didn't allow us to see Aggie. She was admitted into the intensive care unit, placed in on life support so that she could still grasp at whatever life she still had left. The doctors weren't very happy with her condition and warned us that it could worsen at any moment. That news left the entire family on edge.

Axel took it the hardest, as expected. Out of everyone in the family, he didn't have time to ready himself. Even if he did, I knew it would have never made a difference. He became so detached from the world, walking around like a man with no reason or will to keep going, just moving out of habit and not because he wanted to. It pained me to see him become a shell of a man I once knew. Someone who wore his heart on his sleeve and smiled because why shouldn't he? He found the upside to everything, his sea was always calm, a paradise.

But then this hurricane came and shook him, caused his once still waters to rage with anger and his smile to diminish into a permanent frown etched onto a face that held so much anguish. A hurricane, whether given warning about it or not, still left destruction wherever it hit and that destruction isn't always repairable.

I was afraid Axel wouldn't be the Axel I knew him to be. I was afraid of him becoming irreparable.

He went to the hospital every day since his mother's admission. Spending all the visiting hours he could with her. I went once or twice but stayed behind mostly wanting to give the family time with her. Axel went in the mornings and afternoon whereas Stephen and Stephanie went either only in the morning or only in the afternoon. They wanted to give Axel some alone time with her.

The sparkle of hope Axel had in his eyes faded away day by day. As time passed, he became more realistic, more like me, and that scared me. If he kept walking down that road, pretty soon he would lose all the characteristics that made him him. I didn't want him to turn out like me, to begin to overthink situations, to see the worst outcome first before seeing the best, to be hesitant instead of carefree.

I gave the impression that those attributes where my own but Axel knew otherwise While I was fronting, faking it, he was the real deal. Mellowed, completely chilled to the point nothing could faze him. Nothing except this hurricane!

I prayed every day that he would find peace and slowly he would heal and I even prayed for Aggie to find her peace. I prayed that Axel's family as a whole would unite and come out stronger and united because somehow, they were more disconnected with Aggie in hospital rather than when she was in the house amongst us. It wasn't difficult to realize that Aggie was the glue holding their family together and without her, their family was the rubble left after a hurricane.

Hurricane! Dumb fucking hurricane! Why did God create life problems that resembled natural disasters? Where his natural disasters even needed considering the amount of pain humans caused to themselves?

Maybe the stress of the situation wasn't only deteriorating Axel and his family. I felt the strain of it too. I hadn't cried over it or anything but I felt it in my ribcage. A tight sensation on my heart. At first, I thought it was indigestion but when it lasted for longer than twenty-four hours I realized that maybe the loss of Aggie impacted me greatly. She was a good woman, naturing, and caring for those around her. The three weeks I spent with her made me feel as if I never left home.

Although, her cooking exceeded my mom's!

Aggie never cared to cook healthy, she chose to please the taste buds instead. She held my hand and listened to me rant about missing home. Gave me a shoulder to cry on even if I wasn't really crying. She was my pillar of strength and probably a second mother to me.

She was a second mother to many people. Dwayne, Chase, and Dwayne's parents flew in to be with Axel and his family. Dwayne wasn't exaggerating when he called Churchill a good family friend when we first met. Aggie was like a mother to Dwayne. So much so that Aggie even knew Dwayne's darkest secret. Apparently, he couldn't hide it from her because she badgered him about it.

It was awkward meeting Dwayne's parents again. They were baffled at why the girl Dwayne called his date once was now staying with another man. I imagined their opinion of my character must have changed drastically but that was the least of my worries.

"What's it like? Living with him I mean," Chase asked as he pulled up a chair at the kitchen table. Dwayne followed suit while I began to prepare them some breakfast. They had just missed Axel, his father, and sister by a few minutes since they had already left to see Aggie during the morning visiting hours.

Shrugging, I broke an egg on the rim of the frying pan, separated it in half, and watched as it fell into the pan with a sizzle, "Not as bad as I thought it would be. He's pretty respectful and has his boundaries."

"As long as he's not harming you in any way," concern colored Chase's tone. He was always like this even when I worked for him, making sure no one harmed a single hair on my head. He didn't care if I could protect myself because it wasn't about that. It was about caring and not just saying it but also showing it.

"Give the man a break," Dwayne protested softly. He tried to feign calmness but there was a certain edge to his tone that anyone could catch, "He's going through a lot right now and you're out here accusing him of what... Being abusive or something? I know him better than that, you know him better than that!"

Once the egg was a perfect sunny side up I placed it onto a plate and began to fry another. Then I shoved a few slices of bread into the toaster. I wasn't in the mood to make a full-on breakfast for them so eggs and toast would have to suffice paired with coffee.

"Would you two give it a rest. Do you guys always fight?" I let out an exhausted sigh. With Axel moping around it left more work for me to do. There were a lot more orders at the bakery since everyone in town found out Axel was back. Expectations were high and the other bakers were extremely busy trying to tick each order of the list by meeting everyone's specifications. That left very few hands on deck to keep the shop running and prepare eats for the daily customers. I had to admit, Claudia really worked hard trying to keep up with everything.

"We don't always fight," Chase sent Dwayne a warning glare before continuing, "but he thinks of Axel as family and too him, whenever I pick on Axel Dwayne becomes defensive because he has the need to protect him."

The next egg was ready and I slid that into a separate plate. Taking out the four pieces of toast I had made, I placed two on each plate and sat the plates in front of the men. Grabbing the butter from the fridge and a knife from the draw, I placed them on the table before dragging out a chair and sitting opposite Chase and Dwayne.

"Self-service then?" Dwayne playfully groaned as he got up from his chair and made coffee for both him and Chase. He moved around the kitchen expertly, as if he had been in it every single day of his life, knowing where everything was kept.

"How did you meet Axel?" I found myself asking. Dwayne's accent was very American whereas Axel's English accent was very pronounced.

Smiling at me over his shoulder, he said, "I would spend many of my holidays around England since my parents owned businesses here. Axel's father is the most trusty mechanic in town," he turned around and carefully, so not to drop the coffee, walked to his seat and placed the coffee on the table," when I was younger, about ten I think, my father's car had broken down in a snow storm. It was a harsh winters day just before Christmas and everyone was closed and refused to help. Everyone except Axel's dad that is. I remember he came out with his children. His daughter, the same age as me, held curiosity in her eyes, and his son, short and shaggy haired practically begged to go back home and bake gingerbread men with his mother."

I couldn't picture Axel short nor with shaggy hair. I guess I got so used to seeing his lanky tall frame and hair that wasn't long but wasn't too short either. The first time we met, he did have a buzz cut after all. Him letting his buzz cut grow out a bit was a drastic improvement.

"It was so cold and my mother and I needed to warm up. Stephen obviously couldn't fix our car in the middle of the road so he hooked us up to his tow truck and brought us home with him. Our families hit it off almost immediately. Stephanie didn't like me so much, she felt as if I was stealing her brother away from her at the time but she eventually warmed up to me. I gave her no choice because every time I came to England I made sure to stay at least one week at this place," Dwayne let out a small laugh before blowing his coffee and taking a tiny sip to wet his palet.

By the time Dwayne was done with his story, Chase was done eating his plate of food and even began eating a slice of toast of Dwayne's plate. Dwayne sent Chase an endearing look before scarfing down his food.

The house was filled with pictures of Axel and his family but I never really looked at them, paid attention to them. Hearing the way Dwayne discribbed Axel made me want to go through every photo and analyze his features, see what changed and what remained the same.

"Today is the fifth day that she's in the hospital. What are they going to do?" Dwayne mused.

Placing my elbows on the table, I cupped my cheeks with the palms of my hands and slouched forward. Dwayne asked an excellent question. The Doctors advice was to take Aggie off life support telling us it would be too costly and a waisted attempted to keep her on. Axel didn't want to hear a single word of it. It was already Wednesday and the bills started coming in. I could see the stress on Stephen's face and anger in Stephanie's eyes. She understood her brother but wished he would let go because sometimes that's the only option.

"Sit, I'll do the dishes sweetheart," Dwayne softly ordered, "You look like you could use some rest anyway."

"Thanks," My face only found the energy to form a weak smile on my lips but it was something better than nothing, "Would you guys mind taking me to the bakery today. Axel's probably going to come straight home and lock himself in his room like always and the friend that gives me a ride has an important meeting so... I was thinking of taking a cab but since you're here..."

"No worries, I'd like to see Claudia anyway," Dwayne laughed at that as he began washing the plates they used. The sleeves of his baby pink formal shirt had been folded to his elbows, pronouncing the muscles of his biceps.

Chase cleared his throat, humor dancing in his teal orbs as I shifted my gaze to his, "Handsome, isn't he?" His voice was a mere whisper, making sure that only I could hear him.

"I guess. He has a good built and is easy on the eyes."

Chase chuckled, "Don't tell him that or we will never hear the end of it."

I giggled in response, "Noted!"

~~~

For the past couple of days, Emmitt had driven me to the bakery and taken me home. He wanted to do everything in his power to help me and even help Axel and his family after I explained their situation. For a person I just met, he was turning out to be a very good friend, trustworthy and reliable, always willing to help to the best of his abilities when needed. I appreciated that, it was difficult for me to tell him that but eventually I choked it out and told him to relish the moment because he probably wouldn't hear it again.

I just didn't want him to feel used.

After Chase and Dwayne dropped me off at the bakery and Dwayne had a mini catch up session with Claudia, everything resumed as normal. Well as normal as it could get. It was difficult to plaster on a welcoming, friendly smile to greet customers when deep down I had no reason to smile. Every time I smiled the image of Axel's now dull face drifted into my mind, forcing my smile to fall flat once again.

Lacy had phoned, so did my parents, all asking how the situation on this side was holding up. Every day for the past five days they would phone to check if there were any improvements. Deep down they knew there would be none and was just waiting for the time they could pass on their condolences.

By the end of the day, I was too tired to even twitch a finger. Emmitt was already waiting for me outside the bakery while I helped Claudia clean up. It annoyed me that customers left such a mess.

Inconsiderate assholes!

Just as I was wiping down the last table, the ding of the bell on top of the entrance door echoed in the bakery. Claudia came running from the back to see who it was because she had a strict no enter policy when the bakery was meant to be closed. It's why Emmitt had to wait for me outside instead of inside.

"Stephanie, it's you..." The scowl on Claudia's face almost caused a laugh to tumble out of me.

Stephanie nodded curtly at her before turning to me, "Let's go, dad would like you to come with us to see mum today."

Stunned, I stopped wiping the table and stood up straight, "I don't want to intrude."

"You're family, how is it an intrusion?"

I heard a gasp from Claudia but she kept her mouth shut as I contemplated going with Stephanie or not. It would be nice to see Aggie one last time. Because they were only allowing family members to see her I kept my distance but since Stephen and Stephanie wanted me there it made no sense for me to give them space anymore.

"Fine, let me just tell Emmitt," I pointed at the man outside scrolling on his phone before taking off the apron around my waist and tossing it onto the table, "Claudia, please put this away and lock up, keep the keys and come in early tomorrow to open so we can set up again," I almost felt as if I was in charge of the place, as if I owned it.

"I know the drill, I've been taking care of this place longer than you," she offered me a tight smile. The attitude laced in her tone was uncalled for, couldn't she see that I was worried about the place. Anyone would be considering the circumstances. Everyone in the bakery understood except for her and I couldn't help think that she resented me because I stood up and started managing the place once Axel wasn't in the right mind to do so.

The cold wind greeted us as Stephanie and I walked out of the bakery. The setting sun sending hues of red, pink, yellow, and orange through the sky. Gray clouds lined the sky, making it known that rain was about to hit down. February would be over in a week and a half and spring would be in. However, the weather would still be much colder than the spring I was accustomed to.

The heat of the California sun never sounded so good before!

"Ready to go?" Emmitt asked with a warm smile gracing his face. He tucked his phone into the pocket of his black dress slacks. His eyes moved from me to Stephanie, who stood behind me, "And who do we have here?" The beautiful smirk that tugged at the corner of his lips made him look like a sly wolf, especially since I knew what he was up too.

Playfully swatting him in the chest, I chided, "Stop flirting when you're just going to let a girl down anyway!"

He held his hands up in mock surrender, "Harmless fun, love!"

I rolled my eyes at his stupidity, "This is Axel's sister, Stephanie," I turned to Stephanie continuing, "Stephanie, this is Emmitt. A friend of mine and pay no heed to his flirting."

"Wasn't even impressing me anyway," It was Stephanie's turn to smirk.

"Alright, okay! Stephanie is going to take me home. I'm sorry I wasted your time today Em."

"Not a big deal, call me if you need anything," he dipped his head and laid a chaste kiss on my forehead, "I'm never too busy," with that he walked to his car and I followed Stephanie to her dad's truck.

"Does Axel know this guy?" Stephanie prodded as we entered the truck. She pulled on her seatbelt and waited for me to do the same before starting the truck and pulling out of the parking, "Well Barbie? Does he or doesn't he?"

I shot her an incorrigible glare, "He does and why the hell do you call me Barbie? It's getting really fucking annoying," the words slipped out of my mouth before I could stop them. I realized, over the past few days, I hadn't cussed as much as I used to. But since I've been on edge and everything seemed to be annoying me, my cussing returned.

Maybe it being that time of the month also played a part in it.

"Someone's in a pissy mood," Stephanie chortled. She tried to sound happy but her eyes were dull showing me otherwise, "I call you Barbie because of the way you dress. So coordinated, perfect, like some model straight out of Vogue."

I glowered at Stephanie's explanation but decided not to pursue the topic further. We fell into comfortable silence after that, the only sound emanating from the radio. A love song was being played in a low volume. I didn't recognize the song but it had a nice tune to it, catchy enough for me to hum along after hearing it's chorus the first time.

About half an hour later we reached the hospital. It wasn't visiting hours yet, matter of fact, there were still two hours left for visiting hours to begin but I didn't question it. I just followed Stephanie, flanking her side as she led the way to where her mother laid. When I entered the area, I noticed three beds equidistant apart. Aggie laid in the bed furthest from the entrance and closest to the closed window that showed a view of the city below.

Stephen sat by Aggie's left side, gingerly holding her hand between his. Axel was standing on her right, back facing me as he stroked her hair. Stephanie hooked her arm with mine before gesturing me to walk with her. A weak, encouraging smile on her face. That smile only lasted a split second, falling the moment her eyes met her mother's body.

There were many wires and machines hooked up to Aggie. Machines to help her breathe, monitor her heart rate, give her nutrition, and many others which made her a painful sight to take in. Painful or not, I couldn't take my eyes off her. Her face was paler than usual and she was skinnier to the extent that I could see her blue and green veins through her skin. Her face held no emotion but at the same time, she looked so at peace, similar to how Axel looked when asleep.

I stopped at the foot of the bed, Stephanie unhooked her arm from mine and made her way to her father's side, draping an arm over his broad shoulders. The mangled expression on all their faces made my stomach hurt. They were in so much pain, hurting so much. Axel looked as if he could barely contain himself, he chewed on his bottom lip to stop it from trembling. His eyes turned glassy and I shuddered at the way her stared at him mother, not even blinking. It felt like such an intimate moment and I felt as if I were intruding.

Stephen let out a shaky breath, a whimper escaping as he did. His daughter gave him a light squeeze, bending down and placing her forehead on his head while squeezing her eyes shut. I could tell that Stephen had something to say and his daughter approved of whatever it was, all they had to do was inform Axel.

"Axel," Stephen never took his gaze off his wife's limp hand in his, "Your sister and I have been talking to the doctors..." He trailed off, swallowing and blinking away the tears that glazed over his eyes before continuing, "son, I know this is hard for you. It is for all of us, but you need to let go. She doesn't deserve to be like this. She wouldn't have wanted to be like this. You need to let go," his voice broke at the end as he pleaded with his son.

The pang in my chest was unexplainable. It wasn't a pang, it felt more like someone sticking a serrated knife into my heart and then wiggling it around in the wound just for fun, just to cause me more pain and damage. If that was the feeling I attained after hearing Stephen's words then I could only imagine how Axel felt.

His jaw ticked as his eyes snapped to his father. The metaphorical daggers that he shot at the man felt very real. His eyes were cold, empty, and void of any emotion. They scared me because his hazel orbs were burning into his dad as if he wanted his dad to suddenly explode for even letting those words leave his mouth.

Stephen ignored his son's harsh glare and continued, "I think..." He looked up at Stepanie and corrected himself, "we think that it's best to take her off the life support. The decision has already been made, we just wanted to inform you."

At that, Axel began pacing back and forth. His hands burying themselves into his hair, tugging at the roots. He muttered incoherent words as he did so, fury blazing in his once emotionless eyes. I just wanted to run up to him, hug him, hold him, tell him that it will be fine. This was definitely something that was out of his character. No matter how much he tried, he couldn't find that calmness he always slipped into.

Then he stopped, he turned to face his dad, "You can't just pull the plug and kill her!" His voice was louder than normal but not a scream.

"She's practically dead Axel!" Stephanie yelled, "It's these machines that are making it seem like she's alive. Wake up, she can't stay on these forever. You're going to have to let her go sooner or later!"

Axel snarled at his sister, "Easy for you to say, you've been daddy's precious princess. Mum was the only one who was there for me. I won't just stand by and watch you take her away!" He stormed out of the room before they could say anything further.

Stephanie was about to run after him but I had a feeling that she would only make things worse. Grabbing her by her wrist, I shook my head, "Let me go, I'll bring him back. Just don't do anything until he's back here."

Her eyes looked skeptical, "Are you sure?"

"He would rather listen to me than the two of you. I think he's proven that, just don't do anything impulsive before he's back."

Both father and daughter nodded and I took that as the opportunity to run after Axel.

God, I hope he doesn't do anything stupid and that I find him!

Chapter dedicated to Babygurlkasey for her song suggestion widest dreams by Taylor swift! The video of the song fitted last chapter perfectly!