34. Love

"All that's left on the schedule is dinner and debriefing, right?" Nao asked, taking a sip of the suspiciously blue and carbonated drink on his table as he typed.

Looking on their itinerary, he frowned at the extra (scribbled) added event.

Test of courage? Oh you've got to be kidding.

And yet again, something more he'll have to add to the trip report. Just great. That, and Nao had to write two-- one omitting all notes of Korosensei for school records, and the other containing the true course of events which will also be CC'ed to the government.

"Will you be joining us, Kunomasu-sensei?" Korosensei chirped up at the side, green and pink and dressed in all sort of ancient-looking clothing, bundles of paper in his arms.

"Absolutely not." Seriously, Korosensei was easier to handle when he was the size of a handball. Nao set down his drink and turned back to his work. "I have two reports due the end of our trip, so I've got no time to rest."

"Awh," Korosensei deflated.

Nao felt the incredible urge to remind this absolute bottlecap of an Octopus that, as acting homeroom teacher (because Nao was just the homeroom in name,) the school trip records are to be done by him and not Nao.

(Or a student, usually, but Class E is not trusted with the school's official records, so the teachers have to do it. Life is hard for both teacher and student in the End hierarchy, and Nao really hated it sometimes.)

"Just come back and tell me when you've had your fun," Nao told him.

"Roger that," Korosensei saluted. Then with a whistle of wind, a box of pocky materialized on the table, his drink refilled and furnished with a parasol and a new heart-shaped bendy straw. "Here are some refreshments as well."

Nao managed an exasperated, "you cannot be serious about using these for your test of courage," he managed, holding up the very specifically strawberry-flavoured pocky. "Our students aren't idiots, you know."

Korosensei giggled.

"All is fine as long as we all have fun, right?"

Nao chortled at that. Things like these were what made Korosensei such a hard guy to hate, honestly.

"In conclusion, it was an utterly embarrassing disaster," he typed. "Just like the Unidentified Mysterious Octopus himself and everything he objectively stands for."

"It hasn't happened yet! Don't write that, HEY!"

-

For some reason, the kids were abnormally close to Irina on their way back. From the way Korosensei glowed in an obnoxiously excited pink, Nao could guess what was happening here.

They gathered in the lobby while Nao sat outside, in the evening breeze with his laptop and his carbonated blue drink.

Karasuma was still talking further down the beach with one of his subordinates, probably to dismiss them for the rest of the trip after a job well supervised.

(That guy never stops working, does he...)

Nao watched the children as they talked fervently about Irina's until-now nonexistent love life and her apparent raging crush on Karasuma. They then begin to devise ways to fix the overwhelming wave of sexual pheromones she exudes.

It's hilarious how Karasuma can be just out of earshot and have absolutely no idea what's going on. Does he have selective hearing?

Nao finished up his report and slouched back on the chair with a groan. Staring at a computer for long hours really gave him one hell of a radiation headache.

He'll send it after proofreading tonight, he can't do this anymore.

He leaned on just the hind legs as he stared into the lights, trying to get his gaze back into the focus of the horizon.

(Is it just him, or he's getting tired a lot easier lately? Maybe it's the weather.)

"I'll go take a nap or something," he decided. He's got time until dinner.

He hunched back forward, setting the chair back upright-- except, vertigo tilts and the world spin just a little too far too many degrees in the wrong direction and--

"Eehh-- hyACK!"

The chair misaligned against gravity and, after a twirl on the edge of the leg, it finally decided it wasn't playing tabletop spinner with this guy and crumbled backward, bringing the teacher down with it in a painful-looking crash.

"Ow..." The chair hit his ribs. "Okay, that hurt. I think I might have broken a rib." Or two. Or thirteen. How many ribs do people have again?

"Don't be dramatic, it was barely hard enough an impact to cause that much damage," Nao lifted his head to see Irina. It seems like she was finally freed from the nosy students trying their best to be wingmen. 

Weakly, Nao pleaded. "Let me suffer in peace..."

Irina scowled at him in exasperation, "please, if ribs broke so easily, they wouldn't be the defense system of your vital organs." 

And Nao wouldn't be capable of complaining in such fluency, but that's beside the point.

Shaking away the headache of being at a standing height again, Nao groaned. He definitely was going to take periodical breaks from the computer in between from now on, deadlines be damned.

"You know, it really feels like you and Karasuma are the only teachers working on this trip," Irina said, arms folded and looking away, almost in guilt.

"You're telling me," Nao sighed. Bringing a smile to his face however, he chortled. "That's fine, though. There's not much for me to do anyways. And Karasuma's a workaholic-- you can't tear him away from work if you threatened him with a gun."

Irina chuckled at that. "Why can I imagine that so clearly?"

Nao and Karasuma were the only two with legitimate teaching licenses, after all. Irina's was forged for convenience, and Korosensei evidently didn't even have citizenship. Legally speaking, only two of them were qualified to work up here.

(Honestly, what a disaster of a situation. Legal issues would be difficult after all this if the government wasn't directly involved with everything. Though at this rate, the government themselves won't be spared from the wrath of parents and the public.)

Irina noticed the dumb blue-looking drink.

It's one of the strangely-named tropical cocktails the hotel bar offers, though with soda instead of alcohol of some sort. And a parasol and a strange couple straw he thinks was part of a big pack a certain octopus had been holding a moment ago...

"I thought you were the coffee addict?" Irina asked, shoulders slouched in the way that meant she was just bringing up small talk to while away some time. "And Karasuma was the soda guy."

For a guy as cool and stoic as he is, Karasuma sure liked his burgers and carbonated drinks.

(One could argue Karasuma just went for convenience and carbohydrates, but it's an endearing quirk nonetheless.)

"I drink coffee during class or in between, but I switch to carbonated drinks when I need the sugars to get my brain working," he explained. "Karasuma-san works the other way around. He drinks coffee for all nighters, and soda every time else."

Irina hummed, she wasn't aware of that. When she looked away pointedly this time, her shoulders bunched up a little, and her eyes glanced back a little, as if she was suddenly interested in the conversation.

"You guys are like polar opposites, huh," she said, thoughtlessly, Then, "is he like that in you guys' shared room, too?"

Oh? 

Oh.

Oh this is adorable.

Nao did think it was strange that Irina struck a conversation with him and decided to keep it going-- she hated him most of the time, after all-- so it took a bit, but he could tell that she was subtly manipulating the conversation, in the guise of friendly chatter.

He smiled.

This was a nice way to have a break, too. Napping wasn't always the solution.

"He's such a stickler for being neat, I swear," Nao muttered. "Can you believe he made his bed every time he used it? And this morning I was reorganizing my luggage, so I had all my stuff out. I swear when he walked in he looked like he was gonna lose it."

Irina took a moment to picture it. Then she burst into laughter, setting herself on a chair adjacent to him. Her lips twisting upward into a wholly mischievous grin, she leaned forward and spoke in hushed tones.

"You know I just had this amazing idea. When we get back to the mountain..."

It's incredibly childish of both of them to plot for pranks dedicated to their fellow coworker, but Nao wasn't about to stop her.

This was definitely the best interaction he'd had with her yet.

He fed every one of her blatant attempts to dig out some random fact about Karasuma, and listened to her spiel in annoyance about the government agent-- though the slight flush in her cheeks definitely proved that those were factors she adored as much as she found frustrating.

They spoke until the girls came over excitedly, helping Irina coordinate a set of evening wear that they were sure would suit Karasuma's tastes.

Nao didn't get his afternoon nap, but that was fine.

This was much more fun, after all.

One day, Karasuma and Irina were going to fall in love, and Nao genuinely wished he would be there to see it bloom into fruition.

-

Nakamura sought him out near the end of dinnertime, sitting by the veranda with only the cacophony of the background and the sunset before them as company.

"Hey, Kuma-sensei," she began, her voice missing her usual energy. "Did you already know we wouldn't succeed in killing Korosensei this time either?"

Ah, about the one-minute attempt.

("What, Kuma-sensei? You don't believe we can do it?")

Nakamura was the sort that never let things offend her-- or so she made it seem. But she was always the one who felt the ripples of opinions more so than others.

That's why she spent so long of her life, crumbling under the opinions of others and trying so hard to defy them-- only to finally, truthfully shatter under the pressure, trapped in a depth she couldn't imagine to swim out of on her own.

Nao decided it wasn't wise to lie here.

"I knew you would fail," he said. He didn't miss the way she stiffened. "But maybe, I wanted you guys to fail. I didn't want that Octopus teacher to die here-- that's what I honestly believed at the time."

Nakamura looked over.

"At the time?" she wondered, lifting her head a little, "then what about now?"

In response, Nao turned toward the cafeteria, where Korosensei was dodging knife strikes from some students.

"I haven't had this much fun in a very long time," Nao told her. "Coming up here, meeting Karasuma and Irina... even being able to talk to you like this," he chortled. "It's not something that I thought I would appreciate as much as I do now."

(He was sure that Nakamura felt the same.)

(All of the students in Class E felt the same way.)

While their hearts were stagnated by the pressures of the Dead End classroom, the aspect of fun had shriveled up and died. Home wasn't an escape, either-- in fact, life had only crescendoed in severity since third year started.

Korosensei was like a light in their tunnel.

"And I just realized that... if Korosensei died here, all of this would end, too," Nao told her. "It's so cliche it makes you cringe, doesn't it?"

Nakamaru leaned back on her hands-- and took a moment to smile.

"It sure is," she said, in a way that meant it wasn't her true feelings at all. 

(Cliche things like this just shouldn't fly in society-- you want someone to reach in and help you, but that's just begging, like a child.)

(In real life, you have to climb out on your own, and survive in the harsh reality.)

(And yet, here was Korosensei, giving them everything they always wanted. It was like a miracle, to suddenly have it all bestowed upon them so readily that they couldn't believe this was actually happening to them.)

(It's so cliche, she could throw up.)

(And yet.)

Shrinking into herself, she spoke up in a voice that sounded a breath away from tears. 

"And yet, it's true, huh."

Facing away from the cafeteria, with only the cacophony as their guide, teacher and student stared listlessly into the sunset.

They exchanged no more words.

But they enjoyed each other's company in complete, comforting silence. The cheerful laughter behind them was distant, as if separated by an invisible partition between worlds. 

(Nakamura realizes this fact earlier than her peers.)

(As the school term went on and assassination becomes increasinly plausible, the looming impossibility of the assassination began to change, just slightly.)

(It was no longer the fact that Korosensei was simply too fast and thus stood out of their league-- now, the reason was simply love.)

(This did not, however, mean that she was giving up on the assassination on a moral standpoint. Out of respect, obligation and for all the same reasons that she was first motivated to do so, she still wanted to kill him.)

(However, she realized that she would never be able to do it without the tears.)

-

"Did you have fun on the trip, Kunomasu-sensei?"

Korosensei inquired as they headed back to the mainland on the boat. 

The breeze soaked into Nao's skin, kept his hair up in a wind-swept style-- and eased the chronic ache in his chest, just a little.

"It was enjoyable," he admitted, delighted by the view. "Could have been better, though." We could omit the entire poisoning fiasco, for one.

Korosensei chuckled.

"It was an eventful trip alright," he said. "But that's what makes it so memorable, am I wrong?"

And he was right.

Right now, Nao felt like his smile would never fade.