Summer came fast and BTS has a lot of events than the last time—when it was still spring. It's almost August and I'm almost four months here. Malapit na ring mag-autumn at papalapit na rin ang birthday ni Jungkook.

For the last three months, I received unending cold treatment from Mama. I feel bad because I know that she's really upset and that she doesn't agree with me working here. But I can't do anything. My heart resides here, in Korea, and with BTS. Kaya kahit mahirap sa akin ay pinili kong tanggapin na lang ang treatment ni Mama. Mas mabuti na iyon dahil kinakausap niya pa rin ako kaysa sa hindi na talaga. Baka mapauwi agad ako sa Pilipinas kung nagpatuloy si Mama sa pag-i-ignora sa akin.

It's just that... I feel sad because she's treating me coldly. Though, I know that she truly cares whenever she asks if how I am or if I am doing okay here. Hindi lang talaga ako sanay na ganoon si Mama sa akin. And I think I will never get used to it. Ever.

Sa loob din ng tatlong buwan, mas dumami ang mga pagkakataon na nakikita ko si Jungkook at Yeri na nag-uusap. I would most of the time find them arguing. Hindi ko rin naman alam kung anong pinag-uusapan nila dahil kung marinig ko man iyon, hindi ko naman maintindihan dahil nga nagsasalita sila sa sarili nilang lengguwahe. But by how frequent I see them together, my conclusion that there's really something going on between them strengthens.

Pumasok ako sa building ng BigHit. Magla-live raw ngayon ang pito kaya kailangan namin silang ayusan para maging presentable sa harap ng camera. We are taking our time enjoying while the schedule's not yet hectic as the last time. Sa susunod na linggo kasi ay paniguradong mas magiging abala kami lalo pa't luluwas kami ng ibang bansa para sa pagge-guest nila sa isang show. Magpe-perform din sila roon kaya magkakaroon pa ng pagpapalit ng damit at pagre-retouch ng makeup.

"Hey. Good morning," Chae Soo greeted when I went inside the room.

"Hi!" I smiled. "Where are the others?" Tanong ko nang siya lang ang maabutan.

"Ah, they went along with the others to check the set for today's live."

Napatango ako at inayos muna ang gamit sa locker. I tied my hair in a ponytail and prepared the things I will use.

"Annyeong, Tryza!"

I almost jumped when I heard a voice behind me. I turned around and saw Jimin being energetic as he is. Napailing ang mga kasama niya sa kaniya maliban kay V at Jungkook na seryoso lamang na naglalakad.

"Hi. Good morning." I smiled and bowed a bit to pay respect.

He smiled when he stopped in front of me. Nailang agad ako nang titigan niya ako habang nakangiti.

"Uh... Shall we start your makeup?" I asked, trying to divert his attention.

"Oh! Sure," he answered and we both went to his seat.

Nagsimula na nga kami sa pag-aayos sa kanila. It was very quick because they don't want it to look so extravagant and obvious. They want a very simple one so we obliged with it.

Nang matapos kami ay umalis na nga sila para simulan ang kanilang live. Wala na kaming ginagawa kaya naisipan naming bumaba para maaliw ang mga sarili.

Naka grupo kami nang umalis. Kaming tatlo nina Chae Soo at Sae Young at ang iba ay iba rin ang nilakad.

We went to a near amusement park. Pinilit ako ng mga kasama na sumakay kasama sila sa mga rides kaya pinagbigyan ko na lang kahit pa hindi talaga ako sanay roon. I remember the last time I rode a ferris wheel, the world really spinned! Mabuti na nga lang ay hindi ako sumuka no'n. Ano pa kaya itong mas grabe pa ata sa ferris wheel? Baka naman maligaw na sa ibang katawan ang kaluluwa ko nito?

"You look pale." Sae Young laughed at me.

"I'm not good with this. Can't I just wait for you here?" Kinakabahan at napapalunok na tanong ko.

"No way! And we already have the tickets!" She laughed at me again.

"It's okay. I don't mind. I'll just—Wait!" I shouted when they pulled me. "Chotto matte! Ah, that was Japanese..." I blinked when I realized. "Hajima!" I shouted again but they dragged me until I couldn't say no anymore because we were already caged inside the ride.

"Oh my God. I might die here..." namumutlang bulong ko sa sarili.

I heard them laughed again. "Chill, will you?"

"I told you, I'm not good with this!" I screamed. "Shit!" Napamura ako nang magsimulang gumalaw ang ride. Jesus, my heart will jump off my chest in any second!

At halos wala na ngang puwang sa tainga ko ang mga boses ng ibang tao nang magsimulang gumana ang ride. People's screams were muffled by my own. Para na nga akong mabibingi dahil sa sarili kong sigaw.

When the ride stopped, it was like my soul left my body. Naisandal ko ang sarili sa likuran ng upuan at napahawak sa sariling puso. It is hyperventilating!

"Are you okay?" Chae Soo asked me when we went out the ride.

I glared at her. My knees are woobling and I can literally tell that it'll give up in any second.

"Woah, you look like you're murdering me in your head."

"Don't worry, you're already dead in my head," I answered sarcastically.

Pareho silang natawa at inalalayan akong maupo sa isang tabi. Nandiyan na ngayon ang pakiramdam na parang masusuka ako kaya tumahimik ako.

Sae Young left to buy water for the three of us. When she returned, I immediately downed mine to calm myself.

"I'm not coming anymore. If you want to ride more, I'll just wait here."

"Oh, come on," they complained.

Umiling ako. "I've had enough. The world's already spinning."

"But we only had one ride!"

"Yeah, and that's enough to kill me."

They both laughed. Really, they find entertainment with this.

"Alright. You wait for us, okay?"

Tumango na lang ako at pagod na pumikit.

I spend my time there, resting and calming myself. Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras pa ba silang sumakay sa iba't ibang rides dahil pagkabalik nila ay nagmamadali na sila.

"We have to go back," they hurriedly said and dragged me out the amusement park.

Pagkabalik namin ay tapos na ang BTS sa kanilang live. Nakapagpalit na rin sila sa mas kaswal na mga damit dahil magpa-practice na lang din naman sila.

"You don't look good," puna ni Taehyung nang makita ako.

I waved my hand at him. "It's nothing. It's just because of the ride."

Tumaas ang kilay niya. "Ride?"

"Yeah. We went to a near amusement park."

He nodded. "Okay, but... you really look pale and... sick."

I chuckled. "It's nothing, really. I'm just not used to rides, that's it."

He nodded again and left to talk to the other guys. Ako naman ay lumapit kay Jimin para tulungan siyang burahin ang makeup niya.

Pagkatapos ko siyang tulungan sa pagbura ng makeup ay lumabas muna ako para pumunta sa comfort room. I was in one of the cubicles when the main door opened and I heard a voice talking.

"Yeobosseyo?" Yeri's voice echoed in the four walls of the room.

"Ah, jagi..." She sweetly said and I'm not stupid. I know what jagi means!

Umawang ang labi ko. Is she... Is she really cheating from Jungkook?

I bit my lower lip and contained my anger while she was speaking in their language. It took them almost five minutes before they stopped and bade sweet goodbyes.

Nang marinig ko ang pagsarado ng pinto, indikasyon na lumabas na siya ay lumabas na rin ako at naghugas ng kamay. I washed my face, too, to ease the growing madness inside of me and went outside after calming myself.

It's not my business. And it's not my life to take care of so I should not stick my nose to it. Hangga't kaya ko pang magtimpi, magtitimpi ako. Hindi ako mangingialam hangga't kaya ko pang pigilan ang sarili.

Bumalik ako sa kwarto nang magaan na ang pakiramdam. Nang matapos kami sa pag-aayos ng mga gamit ay pinayagan na rin kaming umuwi dahil magpa-practice na lang din naman sila at hindi na kami kakailanganin doon.

Nagsabay-sabay kami ng ilang makeup artists sa paglalakad pababa sa lobby at nang palabas na ng hotel ay napatigil ako nang hindi nahagilap ang cellphone sa bag.

Natampal ko ang noo nang maalalang inilagay ko nga pala iyon sa tapat ng vanity mirror kanina.

"Sorry. Can you go ahead? I left my phone on the room," kausap ko kay Chae Soo.

"Sure. You'll catch up, then?" She asked and I nodded.

Today, since it's pretty early, we decided to grab lunch and go to the bar again. And yes, you read it right. Bar. They have been bothering me  nonstop last month to come with them so pinagbigyan ko na. Unti-unti na rin naman kasi akong nasasanay, at kahit papaano ay tumaas nang kaunti ang alcohol tolerance ko bagaman kung maparami ay umuuwi pa ring lasing.

"Great. I'll send you the details of the resto," she added.

Matapos kong makapagpaalam sa kanila ay bumalik nga ulit ako sa loob ng building. I rode the elevator and when I got into the right floor, went out and made my way into the room. Kaya lang, sa pagliko ko sa huling pasilyo ay nakasalubong ko si Jimin at V na kinausap pa ako kaya bahagya pa akong natagalan.

"Tryza!" Jimin greeted when he saw me. "You forgot something?"

"Yeah. I left my phone in the room."

"Oh, I see. Should I go with you?"

Umiling agad ako. "It's fine. I'll just get it and leave after."

"That... might not be a good idea." Taehyung broke into our conversation.

"H-Huh? Why?" Naguguluhang tanong ko.

He bit his lower lip and looked at Jimin. Tuloy ay napatingin din ako sa kaharap at nakitang nakangiti lang naman ito habang nakatingin sa akin.

Nagtataka akong nagbalik ng tingin kay V pero wala pa rin sa akin ang mga mata niya. I saw how he quietly surveryed the hallway until he let out a silent sigh.

"Nothing," he answered me and talked to Jimin in their language.

Nagpaalam sila sa akin kaya naipagpatuloy ko ang paglalakad. There were no other people in the hallway but myself. It was quiet because it was still working hours for most of the staffs so no one's wandering around.

Nagpatuloy ako sa paglalakad hanggang sa makarating ako sa tapat ng pinto. I moved the door knob and opened it but immediately stopped when I heard people talking inside.

"Yeri..."

Natigilan ako sa narinig at wala sa sariling napasilip sa kaunting siwang ng pintuan. My hand's still holding the knob but my heart started beating rapidly.

"Noona, Jungkook. I'm older than you," Yeri answered in a dismissive tone while fixing her things.

Jungkook groaned. "Why aren't you answering my calls?!" He asked frustratedly and I could't hide my shock. It was like the first time I saw him lose control! He always seemed composed whenever he's talking. This is the only time I see him this way.

"Why do you say that like as if I am required to answer your calls?" Yeri faced him.

"You know I like you!"

My jaw dropped upon hearing that confession.

Yeri sighed and tiredly stared at him.

"Jungkook, I'm like your older sister..." nahihirapang aniya. "Can you give this up? You know that us, being in a-"

"Why won't you give me an equal chance?" Malamig na putol ni Jungkook sa kaniya.

Yeri shook her head. "You don't understand."

"Then make me! Make me understand!" He held Yeri in both shoulders and I couldn't take to see what might happen next anymore.

I turned my back from the door and hurriedly went back to the elevator, completely disregarding my phone.

My knees became weak so I had to lean on the elevator's wall. My heart's thumping bad and violent. The scene I saw and the words I heard kept on coming back.

And it hurts me. Seeing him lose his cool for being too frustrated because his feelings wasn't reciprocated just made me love him more. But with what I saw, pain weighs high. I can't believe that the man whom I thought to be strong enough to handle emotions is greatly in love with someone who can't love him back. And Yeri... God, I felt so stupid for judging her! She's not cheating on him! It was...

It was an unrequited love.

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A/N: Merry Christmas, Pixies! How are you taking the sequence of events in the story so far? Please let me know your thoughts. I do accept bad feedbacks. That'll let me learn from my mistakes.