A hand came down on his shoulder and Lance nearly jumped out of his skin. "Hey Lance!" Romelle choked on her sandwich as Shiro settled beside him. Lance could feel Shiro's warm and lingering touch, he shivered. A smile etching its way into his features as he met eyes with the older male. Shiro grinned at him before glancing over at his friend. "Pollux right?" The blonde girl nodded as she coughed, her pigtails moved with the movement.

"You can just call me Romelle. It's nice to finally meet you when I'm sober." The girl smiled and took a sip of her water. Her smile didn't quite meet her eyes. Lance never thought about what Romelle must think of the older doctor. He began to wonder what she actually thought of Shiro.

"Same to you. Sorry we had such an unfortunate first meeting." Shiro scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably. Lance felt the need to change the subject so the older male was more comfortable. He cleared his throat which got the attention of his company.

"What's up?" He smiled through his heartbreak. Things were supposed to be better between them so he had to act like things were better. Lance didn't want to show his true feelings or how tore up he still really was over it. Despite everything part of Lance still liked Shiro. Even if he knew his crush was in love with someone else Lance couldn't help but like him.

His question seemed to make the older male remember something. His eyes brightened and he patted his full coat pocket. The book barely fit in the deep pocket."I actually have something for you from Keith?" Lance felt himself brighten at the mention of the other man's names. "It's his favorite book." He reached into his lab coat pocket and produced the orange copy of the book. Lance took it gingerly in his hands, feeling the worn cover and the broken spine of the book. It showed how often the other man read it.

"Isn't that book linked with a bunch of killers?" Romelle broke the silence as she tore into a pack of fruit snacks. Lance gave her a look and the woman just shrugged. She offered some gummies to Lance who took some. It was something they did everyday, a sort of ritual.

"I actually think you're right." Shiro mused and smiled at the pair. "I think I remember reading that book in middle school or something." He laughed and Lance's chest tightened painfully.

"Am I seriously the only one who hasn't read it? I know I can't be the only one." Lance set down his cup of ramen on the tabletop and Shiro seemed to frown at it. He became self conscious of his lunch. The other man didn't say anything about even though Lance thought he would. It was a pleasant and sad surprise.

Romelle noticed though. "Yeah Lance is cool with the lunch ladies and they'll heat up just about anything he asks." She forced a laugh and Shiro smiled at her. It was awkward.

"So I can't believe Keith is letting you borrow the book. He won't even let me borrow a book." There was something pained about his expression and Lance loathed it.

"I'm sure it's because he wants to educate me in good literature." Lance played with the remaining noodles in the cup. He actually wasn't sure why Keith was letting him borrow it. Shiro made another face and before Lance could ask him what was wrong he changed the subject.

"So I heard that you're Kaltenecker's favorite students." Shiro smiled and Lance felt himself nodding.

"I wouldn't say favorite but he definitely tolerates us over some of our classmates." Romelle said offhandedly. She began gathering her trash into a neat pile.

"He hates me." Shiro leaned back in his chair and the other two doctors in training laughed. "The feelings were pretty mutual between us but I can I always rely on him for a good consult in the ER." Shiro nodded.

"How do you like your residency?" Lance asked. "I mean have the hours gotten better?" Romelle seemed generally curious as well since she leaned her elbows on the table.

"I'm not going to say it's any better or any worse just that I've gotten a bit more used to it." The actual doctor shrugged. It was getting noisy in the cafeteria. The sounds of so many people talking bounced off the white and blue walls. Romelle turned in her chair to see what the commotion was all about. Her chair squeaked with the motion and Lance cringed at the noise. He picked up his barely warm lunch and began to finish what little he had left. Shiro fished in his coat pocket for a protein bar.

"Do you just like keep an endless amount of snacks in your jacket?" Lance teased and Shiro shook his head and laughed. It was a good hard laugh. Everything seemed okay on the surface but it was almost too painful for Lance to keep acting. Shiro wiped at the corners of his eyes and cleared his throat.

"I have at least two on me. I sometimes get hungry when on shift and can't always go to my locker." He smiled, taking another bite of his bar. "If you're ever hungry after barely filling yourself on ramen I'll gladly swing by and share my snacks." Lance's heart skipped a beat with his words and he had to remind himself that Shiro was just being nice.

"Ramen hater." He heard himself whisper and Shiro began laughing all over again. Their time in the chatroom together really was special. It was something they both cherished dearly. Lance loved the sound of the other man's laughter, he'd do anything to hear that sound again. It filled his chest and swam in his ears. It was such a lovely sound. He smiled and took a deep breathe because maybe everything would be okay.

It wasn't.

"Guys..." Romelle's voice broke Lance's train of thought. The noise in the room reached in all time high and he saw many doctor's scrambling to cleanup and get out. A sudden and distinct beeping caught Lance's attention and Shiro looked down at this pager. Shiro looked at it, brows furrowing with concern. Lance's chest tightened with worry.

"Is everything okay?" He wanted Shiro to reassure him. Lance wanted to go back to his normal lunch and maybe begin reading the book Keith let him borrow. He gripped the book in his hands.

"No. Something's wrong." Shiro pushed his chair back forcefully. The legs made a terrible scraping sound against the linoleum floor. Romelle flinched. "Incoming. Report to your attending now!" His tone made Lance jump up and they ran in different directions. The hospital was in a complete disarray. The word fire and burn drifted down the halls. Romelle and Lance got in the elevator together and as the doors closed Romelle grabbed his hand. She was shaking. He had no idea what they would do if there was an emergency. The hospital was understaffed. Would they be expected to help?

"We'll be okay. Kaltenecker will tell us what to do." Lance tried to reassure her with a tight squeeze to her hand but his voice shook and a slight whimper left her mouth. The elevator continued to go up and they remained silent. The doors opened to a frazzled looking Kaltenecker. The two doctors quickly let go of each other's hands and waited to hear what the other man had to say.

"I was just looking for you two, glad I found you." The other doctor sighed. He stepped into the elevator and a few other doctors and their classmates followed him. Lance and Romelle shifted to make more room. "We have a mass casualty incident on our hands. Multiple burn and trample victims. They're setting up triage in the waiting room. I know you're not doctors but we're asking you to act like one. You'll be checking the yellow tags and the people walking in. The first wave is already here and they're already bringing more people." Lance's mouth went dry. The thought of so many injured people made his stomach churn. How could he help them? He wanted to ask how but he couldn't get the words past the lump in his throat.

"What do we do?" Romelle spoke because she seemed to realize that no one else would. Lance shot her a grateful look and she nodded. The air was thick in the elevator as it descended. Lance's lungs were having a hard time processing air.

"Clear the waiting room for the victims only. Send everyone else either home or to another hospital preferably not our sister hospital because once we fill that's were victims will be heading next." Kaltenecker explained quickly. The anxiety was building as they passed another floor. "Once that's done and if it's already done start doing basic neurological tests. Make sure people are getting enough oxygen. Is everyone certified in basic first aid?" He asked and there was a quiet chorus of yes. "Good. Splint broken arms. Bandage head wounds. Put face mask on elderly and children first and then more severe. Nasal cannulas on people who can breath but look like they need it." Lance's mind was swimming with information. Another two floors were passed. The sense of dread and panic was building.

"You'll be working with the ER department if they grab you then you take orders from them. If I grab you then follow me. It's going to be a mess." He heard Romelle take a deep breath to try to calm her nerves. Maybe he needed to do that too. "If things go to shit and something emergent happens to your patient in triage scream or grab another doctor." The elevator dinged and the doors opened to a confusing abstract of running doctors, crying people, and panicked paramedics. Kaltenecker wasted no time and jumped to follow a gurney that was being brought in. He called out orders, names, and medications. There was so much going Lance's mind couldn't settle on one particular thing. He could hear his own breathing and heartbeat in his ears but everything seem to move around him in slow motion. Lance looked over to see Romelle was already looking at him. She nodded to him as a sort of encouragement and he wanted to laugh. He didn't.

Romelle grabbed his hand and together they rushed to the waiting room where they seemed to be needed most. There were people in the chairs and on the floor in overwhelming numbers. The smell of burned clothes, flesh, and hair hung in the air. Lance wanted to gag but refrained from doing so. He had to work. Interns and residents moved around him, calling out to one another, giving these people the best care despite the situation.

An older woman grabbed onto Romelle and begged for air. He saw Romelle begin to work so he knew he needed to move too. He crouched down to check the man on his left. Broken hand. Already in a splint. Mild pain. Will be set when things calm down. Lance's brain took in the information and began to sort through the important bits. He'd be okay. Looking for his wife. Eleanor. Blonde hair, grey eyes, mole on right cheek. Got it. Next.

Oxygen for Ivy. She's looking for her dad. He just came in. He's not doing too well. Badly burned. Will be transported to the burn unit. Have nurse take Ivy upstairs. Move on despite Ivy crying out for your hand to hold. Next guy. Needs ER. Look for a resident. Direct him over. Move on. Bandage Cal's head wound. He was trying to make it down the stairs when he tripped on a body. No signs of concussion but check in later. Oxygen for Sam. No ash present in throat or lungs. Check on people who are arriving in cars. All green tags. Need to check airways. Good. Next. Two woman rush in. Not Eleanor. Lance couldn't focus. His brain was trying to catch up. It was one thing after another. Move onto the next patient before even knowing if the patient before them was okay. He felt awful like he was watching himself from the third person.

Blonde woman. Brown eyes not Eleanor. Cal's concussion! Find Cal. That's not supposed to look like that. Too much bleeding. Rush her to the ER. I'm sorry I can't help. Get an actual doctor. There's still people trapped in the building? In the elevator? Watch out! Make way for the paramedics! Low on bandages? I already ran out. Kaltenecker should be around with more. Cal is puking? Definitely concussion. Are they bringing down more oxygen tanks? Maybe? We need more. Start moving oxygen tanks around. Ask green tags to wait outside.

Lance didn't even have time to breathe. Right when he finally did something he was whisked away or called over by someone else. His classmates were trying to ease the suffering of these people but nothing was working. Triage began to overflow into the hallways and into the ER despite best efforts. Children were coming in without their parents or parents without their kids. Lance was bombarded with missing people. He was fitting people with oxygen masks and trying to keep the list of missing people straight in his head.

Eleanor. Blonde hair. Grey eyes. Mole on left–no right–cheek. Claire. Pink tutu. Danny. Green cast on arm. Vincent. Red shirt. Oscar. Oscar. Oscar. He couldn't remember anything about the older man. Ally. Scar on left side of forehead. Was Ivy okay? Was her father dead?

"Someone help!" A terrified voice broke over the sea of other terrified voices. Lance looked around to see other doctors busy with their patients. He had no choice but to rush to the noise. Lance found a man cradling a little girl in his arms. She lay limp, unmoving in the man's arms. His blue eyes settled on her pink burned tutu. Claire. She had to be Claire. Where was her mother? What did her mother look like again? Lance couldn't remember what she looked like or what she was wearing. His train of thought began to terrify him. What would he say to her mother?

"What's wrong?" Lance quickly cleared the area as the man set the girl down. He thought of the oxygen mask and who he might need to borrow the device from.

"She's not breathing! I don't know what happened!" Lance's instinct seemed to kick in. He checked her pulse but couldn't feel the gentle thrum under her skin. He began performing CPR. He kept thinking about her mother who was looking for her. What would happen if he couldn't save her? Tears blurred his eyes.

"I need you to grab a doctor in dark blue scrubs. Anyone. Go!" He was already out of breath. His hands hurt and his legs ached but he kept going. He needed a defibrillator. Lance needed an actual doctor. Panic began to claw its way up his throat but he needed to focus on his breathing. He was tired already but he had to be precise and persistent to save her life. He couldn't stop now. Claire's ribs cracked under his hands and Lance screamed. That was what Kaltenecker told him to do. No one came to help him. He kept trying.

Two rescue breaths. Back to compressions. Check for pulse. Rescue breaths. Compressions. How many sets had he done? How long had it been? Where was a doctor? A crowd gathered around him and he tried to not shrink under their stares. This little girl was dying. Black soot covered the skin under her nose and around her mouth. She looked so small. Lance began to beg, to pray, that this little girl would be okay. A part of him knew she wouldn't be. A part of him knew she was already dead.

A pair of arms wrapped around him stopping his movements. "Hey wait! I can help! I can still keep going!" Lance begged and tried to resume compressions but his arms were shaking and he was shaking. All he could see was her pink tutu. He knew her mother was looking for her.

"Lance. She's dead. She's been dead. You have to stop." Shiro hugged him tighter finally getting Lance to stop. The younger doctor's legs gave out and he collapsed against Shiro. Reduced to quiet sobs and shaking limbs. The older male held onto his scrubs and cradled the younger male's head and whispered words of comfort. Lance didn't believe a single word. The crowd realized the severity, realized that she was dead. Horrified gasps and murmurs filled the area. The crowd parted letting a woman finally push her way through. There was a beat of silence and then a mother's heartbroken scream. The sound rattled his rib cage as she collapsed next to her daughter, screaming at him to continue. Lance felt himself cry harder.

Lance couldn't breath and he kept clawing at Shiro's back, trying to get closer. There was a certain shock that chilled his bones and he was suddenly freezing. "I got you. I have you. I'm not letting go." Shiro seemed to know exactly what he wanted to hear, knew that Lance needed a minute. Guilt stomped on his chest. Heartbreak tore him to shreds. Sadness decorated the spaces between his nerve fibers. "We need to move. To get back to work. I'll move the little girl and mother. You help as many people as you can." Shiro pressed his lips into a firm line, not quite a frown but not a smile either.

"Her name was Claire." Bile was rising in his throat. He took a few deep breaths trying to regain his composure. Lance need to puke. "Claire with a pink tutu. I was supposed to help her mother look for her." He mumbled sadly. Lance stood up because he couldn't stand being on the floor next to the dead girl. Shiro tried to grab his hand but instead let Lance walk in the opposite direction. Shiro seemed to know that Lance couldn't handle what he just experienced. That he just needed to get away from the body and the space. Shiro let him.

Lance was numb. Walking among the patients and tragedy still happening around him. The soon to be doctor knew that there would be more death but for some reason Claire's shook him to his very core. He needed to focus on something else. Dedicate his time to helping other people. Lance needed to find more bandages and help Cal who definitely had a concussion. He needed to help the man with the broken hand find his wife Eleanor with blonde hair, grey eyes, and a mole on her right cheek.

His scrubs felt too tight and his body shook with every small movement. Worst of all, every time he closed his eyes he could see Claire's little body, lifeless and unresponsive, and feel her ribs crack under his fingertips.

Someone thrusted bandages into his arms and he set off to help new patients and the other doctors struggling around him. Watching his list of missing people grow until he couldn't remember if Eleanor had blonde hair and grey eyes or brown hair and brown eyes. Tears stung his eyes but he refused to let anymore fall. He had to look strong but his ears were still ringing with Claire's mother's screams. Even though they moved her to the morgue. Even though her body was gone his eyes seemed to drift to that dreadful spot. He winced when he saw the empty space and winced when it filled with injured people. He instinctively reached into his coat pocket to grip onto a corner of Keith's book. He wished he could go back to earlier that day.

It was a terrible day. He'd always remember it. It was a Thursday that he lost his first patient. A little girl with a pink tutu and a mother who's eyes were filled with tears as she thanked him for trying to save her daughter. He wished he could have saved her. He felt lost and alone in that full room. The feeling didn't leave him when he went back to his dorm and cried on the shower floor. It didn't leave him when he stared at the glow in the dark stars on his ceiling begging for sleep to come. It didn't leave him as he started Keith's favorite book. Lance seemed to lose a part of himself in that waiting room. He didn't think he'd ever get that piece back.