Two hours later and Freddy is no way to be found. This one na good revelation! I sat smiling ear to ear as I wrote my note. We had just finished our Government class and we were waiting for our diction teacher.

"Where is Freddy?" a familiar soothing British accent asked. I looked at Kate's heart shaped face and smiled.

"He didn't come to school today"

"And you are happy?" she shot me a quizzical look.

Oh! I forgot that he is my boyfriend! "Oh! No oo!" I waved my hands in the air while trying to hide my betraying smile.

"But your smile says otherwise" Kate pointed out bluntly. She stroke the long cornrows that fell to her face. The hairstyle for this week is all back and base! While my cornrows were hardly reaching my nose, hers had even pass her nose and were touching her jaw. Her hair are too silky and shiny for my liking.

So I decided to change the topic. "Is your hair relaxed?"

"Yes!" she replied.

"Wow! Your hair is long eh!"

"Awwn! Thanks! It is all as a result of the good hair cream I bought in UK" she disclosed.

"Lucky you!"

"Yeah!" her voice came out weak.

"What's wrong? "

"Well, I really admire your relationship with Freddy" she shrugged.

What? Does she know that she is admiring something that is fake?

"Why?"

"I had a boyfriend in UK" she bit her lips and shrugged again. Her long cornrows fell to her face again. This time it hid her sad eyes.

"Then what happened?"

"We broke up since I would be completing my education in Nigeria" she whispered. It was hard to hear but I got the message.

"Ah, that's sad!" I whined. "You miss him, right?"

Okay! Why such a question? Do I want her to cry?.

"Don't answer my question. It was dumb. Sorry" I blurted out quickly.

"Heartbreak hurts!" she concluded and stood up.

"Where are you going?"

"To meet Ken" a wry smile played on her face and she left.

She just reminded me of my biggest fear. Okay! Wait! That's after my fear of zombies, vampires, powerful aliens and mutants!

Ehen! That fear is HEARTBREAK! Geez, I hate that word. That's why I never dated any guy up till now. Okay! Yeah! I never had a boyfriend because no one asked me out. But even if they did, I won't accept them.

I mean, how can you deal with a heartbreak? Isn't it so painful? How can the guy you love with all your heart tell you he loves someone else? Who knows your best friend? Reading a lot of stories of heartbreak has inflicted fear in my bone marrow. I just don't want my heart crushed. Abeg!

That's why I accepted Freddy's offer to create my own story. There is no feeling attached in our relationship. This is a safe ground for me. I won't be broken when we break up. And I am so sure I won't fall for Freddy. He is not the kind of guy I can like. I am so sure of that. His look doesn't affect me in any way. I don't even think he is fine. So I will just date him, create a memorable Highschool love story for myself and break up with him. Easy peasy!

"What's up, cupcake?" a voice whispered into my ear.  I jumped on my seat, startled. I lost my balance and fell into the stranger's arm.

"Jesu! You won give me heart attack?" I pushed out of his arms.

"Hey, baby! Missed me?"

"Freddy? Ho.. How... I.. What?" I stuttered. "Am I seeing things?"

"Nope!" Freddy grinned. He knelt with one leg and was bent to my sitting level. His face inches away from mine. 

"What time are you coming to school?"

"Extremely late!"

"Why?"

"I had to go for a check up" he shrugged.

"Are you sick?"

He stiffened and gave me a fake smile. "Nope! I am fine"

"Big fat liar!" I sneered and slapped his shoulder.

"I am fine jare!"

"Your fake smile says otherwise," Thanks Kate for the new comeback! It really came in handy!

He sighed, "I am fine!". He rose to his feet and slumped into his seat. His shoe stabbed my neat socks.

"Thanks for the morning gift" my sarcastic voice echoed.

"What gift?"

I brought my leg out and pointed to the pattern his shoe left on my socks.

"A work of art, I tell you" he laughed.

"Haha! I just laughed my ass out" I stared with a hard glare.

"You still love me, cupcake. Don't you?"

"What's the opposite of create?" I asked.

"Destroy?" he asked. More like he asked himself.

"Yeah! Next mission! Destroy the legs that messes with me" I replied sharply.

He gasped and pulled his legs to his desk. "Sorry, baby!"

I smiled innocently, "Don't mess with me".

"Good morning students!" a thick weird accent rang. Our diction teacher is here!

The students replied with an off pitch voice, "Good morning  sir".

"Please in my class you speak the right way. I want you to use your intonation accurately" he scolded.

"We be Naija Kids! Na pidgin be our language," Dickson, one of the Star boys jested.

It was time for fun aka time to frustrate our diction teacher. Mr Ola wrote down 'Oral English' on the board. His face was still calm... but not for long. I trust my classmates. He will leave here with a throbbing headache.

"We are going to learn the schwa sound" he announced, his accent was about to sound British-like. But a Nigerian will always be a Nigerian. So we could hear some Yoruba accent mixed with it.

Abeg, teacher no dey form! We dey for Naija! Speak your papa language ni!

Lecture started and I am listening sha! Hey I don't want to fail my waec! I love my life. My papa do kill me if I do!

Mr Ola asked us to pronounce 'Above' the right way. You have to hear the animal noises my classmate were making. Girls and boys found joy tormenting the teacher. He was too gentle and we used that to our advantage.

"No! That's not how to pronounce," he yelled.

"Sir, let me try!" Kate waved her hand in the air. He nodded to her. The class grew silence as we waited for her. We all know that she would pronounce it the right way.

"Above!" her British accent even made it sound better. Mr Ola's smile was wide. Amusement flew around his black prominent eyes.

"Clap for her!" he instructed.

We began a sluggish clap. He narrowed his eyes at us.

"God bless you" he said to Kate. "Please have your seat!"

Kate smiled like she had won an award. Who dey whine this one! She turned to me and her smile expanded. Show off! You know what, I must answer the next question correctly.

See, I am not the jealous type. I am serious! My personality doesn't have jealous written in it. I am just blunt with my emotions. I am like those goody-two-shoe in Disney.

Fine! I know it is not true must you now insult me. Abeg! I am not the jealous type.

    ~~~Author's note~~~

Is Naomi the jealous type? Do you like her that way? Do you want her to be a pure and naive girl?

Thanks for reading. Pls don't hesitate to vote. And pls leave a lot of funny comments. I won laff abeg!

                      Yours sweetest,
                         🇳🇬 Naija Babe