Xeria’s P.O.V

"I love you, Beryl."

His eyes were glistening, and a lone tear dropped from them.

"Leave and don't add to my problems."

No, please don't leave.

"Beryl please."

I rushed past him and didn't even look back.

No, no, no.

My eyes shot open, and huffing, I get up.

"That dream again." Exhaling, I run my fingers through my hair; my forehead dripping with sweat.

I don't even know anymore, if it's a dream or a nightmare because I just can't take this anymore.

Sighing, I feel Potato squirm beside me; he must've jumped on again.

"I'm fine," I whisper, stroking his golden fur, and on hearing my voice, he relaxes.

I check my phone, its 5 in the morning. Sighing, I get out of bed, and my parents’ picture on the nightstand come into my view, and a smile spreads on my face.

I notice my small reflection in the bathroom mirror as I walk to it. In these two years, I have lost a good amount of weight, but fortunately, my hair has not changed.

I use my hands to brush my hair away from my face and lean against the sink. Dark circles were clearly visible, and I now know how to appropriately conceal them with makeup.

I inhale deeply, then looked in the mirror once more, and my eyes turn red. Never again. I'm done with all of this. I turn around, glancing up at the ceiling as I start to slow down my rapid breathing.

Once again, I turn around and splash water on my face as I bend down the chain around my neck slips out from inside my t-shirt, and the ring on it shines brightly.

I'm really pathetic. I asked him to leave me alone when I myself am not letting go of anything.

Why can't I just remove this chain?

Why can't I just throw this ring away?

Why can't I take him out of my mind?

Why am I like this?

"I miss you, mom. I don't know how long I will be able to hold on to all this." wiping my face, I mutter.

I walk out and think of taking Potato out on a walk, but when I see him sleeping peacefully I let him be, at least someone in this room has been having peaceful nights.

Ding!

Who's this so early in the morning?

Picking up my phone, I see Gabriell has posted a picture of her and Quentin from their honeymoon; they're in a different time zone after all.

Smiling, I like her post. They got married just a month ago. After what seemed to be a radio silence, their news of reconciliation came, and they announced that they were getting married.

I felt like a failure and a bad friend that I wasn't able to support Quentin, and rather, he had to be there with me when my marriage was getting annulled.

Dad looked so angry and deceived when I told him everything. Mom had high expectations for my marriage and was devastated to learn that the man his wife had trusted to look after his daughter had lied to them.

He felt ashamed, though, because he believed he had been covering up the truth and endorsing the lies.

In the end, I had no idea what was going on or even what I was attempting to accomplish. At that moment, all I knew was that I felt like I was being suffocated and that I had to break free from everything that was holding me back.

People were advising me left and right that I should rethink my decisions and shouldn't make haste, but we both knew that there was irreversible damage, and it was clear to both of us, and at the end we went our separate ways.

But we didn't, at least not me. I'm still standing behind that closed door, and I don't know if he's waiting for me on the other side.

"Woof!"

"You're up; let's go." stroking his fur, I tell him, and he dashes down from the bed in excitement.

"Be careful on your way out," Aunt Nora instructs me and Potato as we get ready to go out. I give her a small smile and run out of the house to Potato's favorite place.

As we begin to stroll, Potato spots his friends and joins them, and as usual, I sit down on the nearby bench.

No, today Ivan isn't going to be here because he moved in with his fiance. Ivan and Tarquin are also getting married, maybe in a month; all my friends are, so I have a lot of invitations this time around.

Well, attending them isn't a favorite part because I'm still not immune to the side whispers and gossip.

After Potato was satisfied with his morning walk, we went back and joined Dad on the dining table, where he was reading the newspaper and Aunt Nora was preparing breakfast.

"Good morning, Dad," I greet him, taking the seat beside him.

"Good morning, honey and potato," Dad smiles, keeping the newspaper down on the table.

"Moira has been singing your praises lately; I'm happy that you've taken on everything pretty well." Dad says it with a smile on his face, and I nod in response.

"And honey, get ready after finishing your breakfast; you have your session scheduled today; I will drive you there," he informs me further.

"Oh, it's today; I will be ready, Dad," I reply, feeling my hands getting sweaty and my heart pounding in my chest.

"I'm happy that you're taking a step further; I'm proud of you." Dad shares his praise as we start the breakfast.

After breakfast, I get ready for the session. It was pretty visible to everyone in the house that I'm still stuck at the same place and that I need to let go of things, and therefore, the idea of therapy came to dad's mind, and I complied, thinking that I would be less pathetic and miserable than I already am.

"Are you ready?" As I step down, Dad asks.

"Yes, let's go," I answer him and we head out for the session. Aside from the routine conversation about work, the drive to the therapist was quiet, or so I thought.

"The daily update on billionaire lifestyles is shown next on the channel. Quentin and Gabriell, who recently got married and are enjoying their honeymoon, are a beautiful couple. Speaking of which, Khaos has been in the news lately. It appears that he is dating a model, whose identity is currently unknown to us, but their relationship appears to be going quite well."

"Yes, it appears that he is moving on."

I was overcome with emotion as soon as I hear the news. Dad turned it off before I can listen any further.

I maintained a proper facade when Dad looked at me, but my insides were betraying me.

Before I can become an emotional wreck, we arrive at our destination.

"All the best, honey; I'm here for you." Dad comforts me with a smile and nodding I leave the car. I step inside the building as Dad drives off, and as soon as he left, I walk out of the building.

I can't do this; I won't be able to. I hold my face in my hands as I ponder, and my breathing becomes uneven. I take support from the nearby pillar and hug myself. 

"Xeria?" I hear someone call me, and when I turn around, I see Jake standing in front of me.