thirty four | skyfall

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i suppose i'm at the stage in my reminiscence where i usually stop and rewind the memories, starting again. i grow anxious towards the christmas section, but i'll relay it anyways for the sake of the end.

the morning of the 26th i was awoken by a phone call at about six in the morning. it made me cranky, and i nearly threw my phone against a wall before i noticed it was hyuck. yet just as i went to pick it up the call ended, and popped up on my screen as 'missed'. i was confused, to say the least, since i wasn't planning to get up so early. but i was intrigued by this unusual call, and for all i assumed he had just called me by accident when he'd really meant to turn off an alarm or play music or something, i got up anyways and got dressed to investigate why he was even awake.

i slung my bag of stuff for the day and night ahead over my shoulder, remembering to pack my new camera to show him. it was exactly the type of thing he'd have loved.

then, being as quiet as possible, i left the house and wandered across the street in the dark towards his front door. i went to knock, i think, but i got nervous. surely his parents didn't want to be woken up at this hour on a holiday morning. choosing a safer option, i called hyuck's number and waited patiently for him to pick up.

he didn't.

that annoyed me. he'd woken me up before the crack of dawn and now he couldn't even return my calls. i swallowed the guilt i felt for ringing the bell and tried it anyway, swallowing thickly. the sound of footsteps that morning still rings in my ears when i recall this moment, the sound of his mum making her way to the door in her dressing gown and opening it with bleary eyes.

"oh, hi renjun," she yawned, seeming as confused as i felt. "you're...very early."

"i know, i'm sorry," i apologised, but i couldn't regret my actions. "i wasn't planning on this, i promise. but hyuck called...is he up?"

"did he?" she frowned, looking towards the stairs she would've come down from and shrugging. "that little menace. he could've answered the door then."

"yeah...he didn't pick up when i tried to call him back, so."

she looked surprised at this and shared a look with me for a brief moment too long before we shut the door behind us and thundered up the staircase, sprinting down the hall so fast she nearly slipped behind me. i steadied her with one arm, both of us breathing so hard it was as though we'd run a marathon.

"hyuck!" she called, knocking on his door. i didn't have that kind of patience and just opened it, rushing in and finding his bed empty, the sheets pulled askew. mrs. lee followed me in.

"where is he?" i wondered aloud, thinking it was odd even his phone wasn't in here. "the bathroom?"

"i'll go check. he should've answered," she gushed and went off to take a look. i remained in his room, edging around it and looking for signs of something amiss. why did he call me? why didn't he pick up when i called back? why wouldn't he answer us when he yelled his name?

i made it to his bed and observed the way in which his sheets had been pulled. it was as though he'd stumbled out of them and pulled them with him...i think that was what pointed out the obvious. that singular thought.

i scrambled around to the other side and found his body heaped on the floor, sheets tangled around his legs and his phone cracked by his hand.

an instant wave of nausea hit my system, and i fell backwards against his wardrobe and screamed.

all i can tell you from there is that his parents both ran in, there was screaming, there were hands pulling at me, at him. calls were made, sirens rang out. and then nothing. i don't know what kind of haze i had been in throughout all the questions, all the nagging, all the news. but it had been deep and senseless.

lee donghyuck had died. from stomach cancer. and i'd never ever get to hear his voice again.

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