~Chris' POV~

After a depressing "rehearsal" session, I pulled Phil aside to explain to him what was going through my head. I knew that if anyone was going to understand my thought process, it would be him. He's been my best mate since grade school, and I loved him like a brother. Him and I had always told each other everything, from girls we fancied to teachers we hated. I felt the need to tell him everything going through my head. I owed him that much.

"You've got a lot of explaining to do, mate," Phil told me, crossing his arms.

I sighed. "I know, but please hear me out."

Jonny smiled at me as him and Guy walked downstairs. "Where are you headed?" I asked them, briefly distracting myself from my explanation.

"I'm taking Jon out for a pint so we can hang out for awhile. Besides, you're going to taint his mind if he hangs out with you for too long," Guy teased, earning a chuckle from Phil and Jonny.

"Fine, you win. Just don't poison him too much," Chris replied.

"Whatever, I'm saving his arse."

Chris scoffed. "If you say so, Guy."

They parted their ways, and Will joined Chris and Phil in the lounge. "So, are you going to explain what in the bloody hell you were thinking or are you going to just stand there?" Will asked.

"Yes, he is," Phil answered for me, and they both stood in front of me, waiting for an explanation.

I sighed. "I... I couldn't let him slip through my fingertips again," I began. "At first I saw the accident as a horrible thing. My best friend was taken away from me. And I know I'll sound like a terrible person for saying this, but... the more I thought about it, the more I saw this as an opportunity to start over. I didn't want to make the same mistakes that I made when I was 20. I wanted to be with him, I wanted to keep him for myself."

"But did you realize the consequences it would have on Chloe? And her kids?" Phil asked, clearly irritated with me.

I sighed again. "Yes, but he wanted me. He met Chloe. He knew that she was his wife. I didn't lie about that. He just chose me."

"Yes, but you also told him that they were having marriage issues," Will said, recalling our conversation from the day before.

I blushed. "If I had told him that he was happily married to Chloe, he might not have chosen me," I replied sadly.

"Chris, you could've ruined his life. What if he decides to get a divorce with Chloe, then gets his memory back?" Phil told me.

I felt anger bubble in my stomach, and I took a deep breath to try and calm myself down. "I know this. I'm going to tell him some time this week, I swear," I promised.

"Why wait?"

I sighed again. "Apple is sick and misses me. Gwyneth wants me home by Monday, and after everything that I've told Jonny... there's no way that I can find an excuse to get myself out of this."

Phil crossed his arms. "That doesn't explain why you can't just tell him now."

I felt my cheeks grow hot in embarrassment. "Because I want to keep him for a few days. Just a few. Just a few days where he's mine."

Will and Phil made a similar motion with their hands, bringing their hands up to their faces with a look matching that of annoyance. "Do you really think that's what's best for him right now?" Phil asked.

"I..." I shook my head in disappointment. "No. It's selfish. I just... couldn't stand to live life without knowing what his lips tasted like, or what it felt like to be completely encompassed by his radiant warmth. I couldn't live life without knowing what could have been." I felt myself beginning to tear up, all the animosity gone now.

Will shook his head. "You really fucked up, Chris. But... I understand."

Phil nodded. "If I hadn't made a move on Lara and she had gone on to be with some other guy, I think I would have taken any selfish opportunity that I could to have her for myself, despite how it would hurt the ones around her."

I smiled a bit at the mention of his wife, and even giggled a bit imagining him trying to beat up some bloke in a desperate attempt to have her for himself. "I know the circumstances are shit, but this is my opportunity to at least make it known that I want him. You know?"

The other two nodded in understanding. "As long as you tell him before you leave for LA," Will insisted, and I nodded.

"You'll never understand how much I love him," I finished, before I began the short walk back to my flat. Phil followed me, not struggling to keep my pace like Jonny sometimes did. I was reminded of times back when Jonny liked to take nice walks on the beach with me in LA, and I would always tease him for not being able to keep up with me. It was hard to tell if the Jonny in his place would still enjoy that teasing, or if he would get angry at me for being so rude.

"What are you thinking about?" Phil asked me, interrupting my thoughts.

"How mysterious Jonny is now," I admitted. "Of course, he's always been reserved, but he was still predictable. I could guess what he would his reactions would be, what he enjoyed and what he would be embarrassed by. Now I'm somewhat afraid to do anything that Jonny might have loved, because he might get defensive and mad at me. I just don't know."

Phil nodded. "I know what you mean. That fit he threw at The Bakery threw me off guard a bit."

I sighed. "It's not the first anger fit that he's thrown. He threw one the other day and kicked the coffee table across the room."

"Oof. I hadn't even realized he was that strong."

"Right? It's actually a bit scary."

We walked in silence for awhile and I shoved my hands in my pocket. "I miss him, but I still love him."

Phil sighed. "Do you love him, or do you love Jonny? Because those seem to be two completely different people."

I nodded. "I know. I'm still..." I sighed. "I'm still figuring it out."

"I think he loves you, Chris," he said, looking at me now.

"I know he does."

"You need to be careful with that. Love is dangerous, and if you're not careful, you're going to really hurt him."

I sighed again. "I know. That's why I'm so afraid for when I tell him the truth."

Phil put his hand on my shoulder and frowned. "The best cure for a lie is the truth."

I scoffed, taking out my keys as we neared my flat. "Well sorry, but I've already told you why I did it."

"I know, mate. I was just making a point."

I unlocked my flat and let Phil inside first. "Can we just drop the subject? I already feel horrible."

Phil nodded and looked in my fridge. "How the bloody hell can you survive with absolutely nothing in your fridge?"

I chuckled. "I just don't need that much, I guess. Surely there's something in there."

"Come on, you don't actually expect me to eat just pita bread and hummus, do you?"

"Erm... how long were you expecting to stay?" I teased.

Phil rolled his eyes. "A couple hours, I thought, but damn! I'm going to starve before I get out of here!"

"You can't survive a few hours without food?"

"I can, but I can't survive an entire day without food. I only ate banana bread this morning."

"And I only ate a bowl of Wheat Chex. I think you'll be fine," I replied, playfully rolling my eyes at him.

"What about Jonny? Are you trying to starve him, too?"

"Jonny is at the pub with Guy! I think he'll be fine!" I answered.

"Come on, can't you just order a fucking vegetarian pizza or something?"

I groaned. "Fine, if it will make you stop your bloody whining, I'll order a pizza."

Phil's face lit up with glee, and I giggled at my friend. "Great! That means I can have a party, right?"

"I swear if you call Lara and invite her over, I'm going to punch you in the mouth."

Ten minutes later, the pizza had arrived, Lara was sitting on my sofa, and Phil's mouth was bleeding.

"How are you coping, Chris?" Lara asked sweetly as Phil wrapped his jaw in a small towel in an attempt to stop the bleeding.

I shrugged. "Alright, I guess."

Phil chuckled and sat next to his wife on my sofa. "If by alright you mean lying to Jonny about his relationship with Chloe so that he can use him for his own selfish purposes, then yeah, Chris is doing actually really well."

Lara gasped. "Chris? Are you really taking advantage of Jonny like that?"

I sighed. "I've already explained to Phil why. It's a long story."

"You are then?"

"Yes, unfortunately."

Phil wrapped his arm around Lara and pulled her in close to him. "He's been in love with Jonny since they were 20, and he couldn't bear to see him with Chloe. Now that he doesn't remember being with Chloe, Chris saw it as a chance to start over rather than a time of mourning."

Lara hummed. "That makes sense, but don't you think there was a better way to do that than lie to him?" She took a bite of pizza and accidentally spilled some sauce on Phil's shirt, making them both giggle.

"There's always a better way to do things," I countered. "But what's done is done."

Phil sighed. "Yeah, and poor Jonny is going to suffer because of it."

"He won't suffer! I'll make sure of that!" I promised.

"I don't know, Chris. You've really pumped a lot of lies into him. How is he going to recover from that hurt? He really trusts you, and you're going to throw all of that out the window," Lara said, taking another bite of her pizza.

"How has this turned into me being scolded? I get it! I fucked up!" I said, exasperated, before sitting beside Phil on my sofa. "Can we just watch something on the telly?"

"Aw that's no fun. How about we continue making fun of you," Phil suggested with a chuckle, followed by Lara's giggle.

"We could make music?" I tried, and Phil exaggerated a sigh.

"Fiiiiiiiine. Grab me a guitar."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Jonny's POV~

Apparently I'm a very bubbly drunk.

I hadn't wanted more than just a couple drinks, but Guy had warned me that it didn't take much to get me drunk. I had just scoffed. "I'm a completely different person. It'll surely take more than a couple shots of vodka to get me tipsy."

Guy was right, apparently. I had felt the effects of the intoxicating drink in one sip. I wondered how often I drank alcohol if I could get tipsy that quickly. I'd have to suggest to Chris to go out more often.

I actually learned a lot about Guy on my outing today, despite being drunk and "high on life" as I had stated to Guy earlier. He's a bassist in two bands, our band and one called "Apparatjik". He's got a daughter named Nico (a name that I actually really like), who's mum is Joanna, though her and Guy don't get on very well. He's now engaged to a woman named Keisha, whom he's promised to show me soon.

I asked Guy to tell me some of his best memories, and he laughed as he told me this really funny story about me not being able to order vegetarian food in Japan because I sounded so painfully English that the restaurant staff didn't understand me and I had to try meat for the first time. He also told me about how one time I threw up for eating too much cake, and I got it all over my favorite guitar, so it ended up sounding like a dying cat for a week. Plus, it smelled like vomit and the smell refused to come out.

The entire time he was telling me these stories, I imagined Chris sitting beside me, laughing with me and telling me how he remembered the story. I think Guy could somehow read my mind, because after telling me the story about my poor guitar, he shifted the conversation to my boyfriend. "So, how did you and Chris get together?" He asked.

I bit my lip, suddenly feeling a bit uncomfortable. "I er... I kissed him, and asked him if we could be a thing."

"And what'd he say?"

I was having trouble thinking clearly at that point. Was he trying to corner me? Why did he care what Chris say? Was Guy going to use it against him? I couldn't tell if he was trying to break us up or what, but my guard was suddenly a lot further up than it had been previously. "He just told me that I needed to talk to Chloe about it."

"That's all he said?"

I nodded nervously.

"Hm... ok. Hey speaking of Chloe, have you met Jonah and Violet yet?"

I shook my head. "Chloe wanted me to wait until I got myself almost completely together. She didn't want them to see me as a different person than who I used to be."

The thought of meeting my children scared me. Chloe wanted me to be the same Jonny that I was before the accident, but I'm a completely different person from him. I wanted to be myself when I met the kids, not pretend like I was something that I'm not every time I saw them.

"Do you think that Chris would let you see your kids?"

"Of course! He's got kids of his own, too. Why wouldn't he let me see mine?"

Guy huffed, and I suddenly felt very scared. Why did he seem so against the idea of Chris and I as a couple? Was he jealous? Probably not. I was sure that he loved Keisha as much as he said he did. What was it then?

"I think I'm ready to go, now," I said.

"Aw, so soon? I can stop talking about Chris if you feel uncomfortable."

I took a deep breath and nodded. "Let's talk about how hot you look in horizontal stripes," I teased, my drunk personality showing through again.

He laughed, and the rest of the afternoon was spent discussing silly things, like what would happen if humans tried to take a boat to Mars. We felt like children, talking about such foolish things, but of course, we were both drunk, and really didn't care what we discussed, so long as it wasn't anything serious.

After another hour, and an extremely embarrassing dance session, Guy suggested that we leave before we completely lose our dignity. I laughed and agreed, and he offered to walk me back to Chris' flat. I took him up on the offer and together we walked, side-by-side back to Chris' place.

There was a silence before Guy finally spoke. "Are you sure that you want to do this with Chris? I don't want him to hurt you."

"Chris would never do that," I responded quickly, almost before he could finish.

Guy sighed. "Never be so sure of anything, Jon," he warned. I felt uneasy, though I could tell that Guy truly cared for me and wanted to protect me. I searched his hard, cloudy brown eyes for any sort of answer to my insecurities, but found none.

"What are you hiding, Guy?" I thought out loud.

He looked at me, his hard eyes turning soft for only a moment before they regained their normal look. "Nothing that you need to worry about right now."

I frowned. Was it because I wasn't the Jonny that he was used to? Was that the reason he felt the need to hide shit from me? "Why?" I asked unintentionally.

He shook his head. "You've got other things to worry about right now. My secrets are none of your concern."

Though I understood his logic, I was drunk and felt betrayed. "Lies!" I called out, stopping now. "Just because I don't have my memory doesn't mean that I'm stupid, Guy!"

"What? I didn't say-"

"I know what you said, but you implied something completely different!"

His eyes widened, and I could see the fear in them. "Whoa, Jon. Calm down."

I felt the need to kick something, so I ran ahead and kicked a street lamp, badly stubbing my toe. "Fuck!" I shouted as Guy ran to catch up with me.

"Jon! Are you alright, mate?"

I sighed, and my breathing returned to normal. "Yeah. I'm sorry for snapping at you."

"I'm not keeping secrets from you just because you lost your memory, I hope you know that."

"I do, but it is partially because of that?"

Guy hesitated. "Partially, yes," he admitted.

"Ok." I sat on the concrete and put my head in my hands. "Chris will never love me if I keep pulling shit like this," I mumbled.

Guy sat down beside me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "Don't be hard on yourself, Jon. If Chris loves you, he'll love you no matter what."

"But what if he doesn't?" I asked quietly. He went quiet and I sighed. "That's what I thought."

"Here, how about we go ask him ourselves?" He suggested. I looked up at him, confused. "We can walk into his place and confront him about it. He's usually very honest around me. I scare him."

I chuckled and stood up. "Fine, but only because I love him so much."

Guy smiled slightly and stood up next to me. "I'm sorry if I've made you uncomfortable. I just don't want to see you get hurt," he said, and I nodded.

"I understand. It's alright."

His grin grew, and he wrapped his arm around my shoulder as we walked back to Chris' flat. I waved at some of the passers-by, suddenly in a good mood. Chris loved me, I was certain of that. Otherwise, why would he say so?

When we reached the front door of his house, we didn't bother knocking and instead just walked in. After all, it was my house, too.

I had to hold in my giggles when I saw the scene before me. Phil and Chris had guitars on their lap, but were slapping each other in the face with pizza, while some girl was sitting on the side, laughing her arse off.

"What the fuck is going on?" Guy asked, and Phil and Chris turned to look at us with their greasy faces, and I burst out laughing.

"Chris kept complaining about me hitting sour notes, so I slapped him in the face with a pizza!" Phil explained.

"Well, you sucked, Phil! Anyway, so I felt the need to slap him back."

The girl spoke up, still in a fit of laughter. "I went to the restroom and came back to them slapping each other with pizza!"

Guy just sighed, a smile tugging at his lips. "You blokes are grown men and I come to find you slapping each other with pizza." His grin grew. "How come I wasn't invited? I want to slap Chris with a pizza!"

"Yay! Guy is on my side!" Phil shouted.

I grinned. "Don't worry, Chris! I'll protect you!" I ran over by my boyfriend's side and grabbed a slice of pizza from the box, as did Guy, standing by Phil.

We all stood in a fighting stance, waiting for the cue to go. "Ready?" The girl announced. "Get set... GO!"

As soon as the words were said, I took a swing at Guy as he and Phil both went after my boyfriend. Guy smirked at me and took a swing at me. I ducked, but was hit by Phil's pizza as I came up. He laughed, and in response, I hit him back harder, causing a pepperoni to fly off and hit Chris' face.

"Jonny! You're supposed to be on my side!" Chris shouted.

"Yes, Jon! Turn to the Dark Side!" Guy laughed.

"It was an accident!" I argued.

Phil grunted. "Fine!" He slapped one side of my face with a pizza, and Guy slapped the other.

We all laughed, and finally, Chris threw his hands up. "Alright! We give up! You win!"

Phil and Guy high-fived, their hands slimy with pizza grease. Chris and I laid back on the sofa, and the girl laughed again. "Good job, Philly!" She congratulated, kissing him on the lips.

"Is that your girlfriend, Phil?" I asked.

The girl looked back at me in surprise, then giggled. "I'm sorry, Jonny. I completely forgot to introduce myself to you." I liked this woman a lot. She seemed funny and sweet. "I'm Phil's wife. My name is Lara."

I smiled at her. "Nice to meet you... er... again, I guess."

Her smile fell slightly. "Yeah. It's ok."

I nodded, and Phil and Guy shared a look. "Lara, I think we should get back to the nanny."

Lara nodded, and her smile grew again. "You're right. It was nice seeing you again, Jonny!"

I felt a bit awkward at her goodbye, as I had never met her before today. "Yeah," I replied, and Phil and Lara hurried out.

Guy stood there awkwardly. "I'm guessing that this is my cue to leave as well."

Chris chuckled. "You can stay if you want, but Jonny and I are going to fuck," he teased, making me giggle.

"You two are disgusting. I'm getting out of here before I can hear any more out of either of you." He turned to me and winked. "Don't forget what I told you, Jon," he reminded.

I smiled. "Always use a condom?"

"You bastard. I'm out of here."

Chris and I both laughed, but as soon as Guy was gone, Chris' face turned serious. "Are you alright, Jonny?"

I nodded, and was reminded of the conversation that Guy and I had on the way back. "Guy thinks that you're going to hurt me," I admitted. "But you would never do that, right?"

He blinked. "Why would he think that?"

I mentally sighed in relief and smiled. "I don't know. Maybe he thinks you're some stupid whore who only wants to use me for sex."

Chris scoffed. "Come on, if I were really doing that, I'd never leave you. I mean, have you seen that ass?"

I bit my lip at his choice of words. "You wouldn't ever leave me, though. Right?"

He hesitated, then sighed. "Well, there are some circumstances in which I'd be forced to leave you."

My breath caught in my chest. "Like what?"

He had said too much.

"My... Well, remember when I told you that my ex-wife lives in London with our two children?"

I nodded.

"She... actually lives in LA."

My eyes widened in confusion. "LA? How do you see the children? Surely they're not making 14 hour trips every weekend."

Chris shook his head. "The truth is that... I live in LA, too."

My heart sank. He had lied to me. "What? But I thought that I was living here with you while Chloe and I worked out our marriage issues!"

Again, he shook his head. "Jonny, I lied. You and Chloe are happily married with your two children. I live in LA with my kids and see you once a month. Sometimes you and the guys come to LA and sometimes I come to London. You've probably never been interested in me, honestly." I noticed his eyes start to well up with tears.

"So... you lied? About everything?"

"Not everything! I never lied about loving you. I've always loved you, ever since we were roommates back in Uni."

I shook my head. "I'm sorry, I just... need some time to process all this."

I sat down on the couch again, ignoring my greasy hands. He had lied to me. Guy was right. He had used my condition to his advantage and tried to break up my marriage. How could I trust anything he said now?

"I leave tomorrow," he added. "I was going to wait until Sunday, but I can clearly see that you want me gone."

I said nothing, not moving a muscle. He just sighed. "I'm going to go pack."

Just like that, it seemed like my life had fallen apart.

Again.