[my baby, Jules]

THREE: when you confront your love.

"Jade!" Pushing my way past a couple making out, I scanned the area for my sister amongst the stoners. The highlife basically consisted of empty takeout boxes and containers littered all over the ground where a couple people lay staring up at the wooden hood. We were underneath the local beach's boardwalk.

I'd glanced around for a short, brown-haired girl with green eyes and a matching green streak in her hair, my worrying hitching up more every second. I'd seen so many drunken and passed out teenagers, crushed beer cans, and people on the verge of being impregnated, I was about to throw up in the beat up trash can Jade's boyfriend, whatever his name was, -Christian, Carson, Cashier- was sitting on.

Getting closer to him, I'd noticed his pupils slightly dilated as he looked at me with a lopsided grin, "Hey!"

"Hey, Julian, man what's up?" He was swaying slightly as his feet dangled, his smile flawless with an exception of a missing left molar. Chris went to pat my shoulder, almost slipping off of the lid as my arms instinctively shot out to grip his forearms.

I rolled my eyes at Clayton as he let out a 'whoa man', laughing loudly in my face. I grunted, the effort of keeping him up, putting strain on my wrists due to the awkward position. My foot shot back, holding me upright as I almost fell over, "Where's my sister?"

Just then, I'd seen a flash of green as my sister came bounding towards Clifford, her eyebrows raising at me when I wouldn't release him onto her, knowing that he was too much weight for her, "Caspar, baby."

So his name was Caspar? Close enough.

His hands came up to rest on the sides of her face as my hands shook off of him, "J-Lo..." He let out as their lips interlocked and I looked away, bile rising in my throat as I refused to think of where his hands might've been.

He was touching her face.

I coughed, "It's Jade."

I heard a chuckle as I heard rustling, my head snapping over as I'd seen her sitting on him, facing him as they ignored the fact that I was there. Caspar groaned, as his hands sliding down, me standing there horrified, "With a booty like J-Lo-"

My eyes widened before I grabbed my sister's waist and tugged her leach-like grip off of him. Lift with the legs, lift with the legs, "and you're coming with me." Gritting my teeth and tugging, I thanked The Lord that I hadn't tugged too much as she came tumbling off of her boyfriend and I was able to catch her without falling myself.

Latching myself onto her arm, I pulled as I guided here from underneath the boardwalk, ducking when we'd gotten to the unneeded trash bag hung over the edge. Jade however, didn't duck and it smacked her in the face.

She had been drinking heavily.

"How many beers have you had?" I sighed, turns around to face my sister as we made it closer to Dad's old pickup.

"Four," she said holding up her palm, all five fingers raised.

Rolling my eyes, I opened the door, shoving her onto the seat and buckling her seatbelt.

Hopping in, I didn't protest when her head came lolling over to my shoulder, no matter how much she reeked of alcohol and cigarettes, "You're so lucky I don't hate you."

If I did, I'd rat her out.

: : :

"Calum..." I'd been trying to talk to him alone for a while but every time I got him alone, other guys would come up to him or he'd be whisked away into his other friend groups.

Calum was a pretty popular guy due to the many sports he was included in, baseball being one of them and trust me, I was sure to go to every one of his games. Raising an eyebrow at me as my eyes wandered to his defined chest but averted quickly, Calum shrugged his pullover hoodie back on as we walked to our next class.

My palms were sweating, my knees were weak, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to punch something from frustration or throw up as I watched our feet sync, my Tims and his Vans looking oddly made to compliment one another as I'd normally be wearing the Vans.

I was wearing my new socks that said Gay is Okay on them, the ones that Jade had bought me when I told her and I was feeling pretty self conscious of everything. I made sure to keep them tucked under my jeans as if someone would notice the slight peek of black and white socks.

"Jules?"

I took a breath, trying to make my hands stop shaking at my sides. My voice started shaking as I tried to push out my words. I made sure not to look at Calum or I'd chicken out, "Can I... Can I tell- I need to tell you something."

He nodded his blonde head, perfect ocean blue eyes scanning me as if he could tell what I was thinking. I shoved my hands into my pockets, my polo sweatshirt suddenly becoming itchy on my wrist as I scratched, I was sure that he could hear my heart beating, "You okay, man? You're sweating."

No shit, Cal.

Rip the bandaid off, quick and just say it.

I'm homosexual, I'm a twink, I'm queer... No, I'm gay, I'm fucking gay and that's okay.

"Do you like me?"

"Of course, bro." Calum laughed, punching my shoulder as I realized that I'd have to ask again and be more clear. And I thought saying anything would be hard. My throat was closing up, it was getting harder and harder to breathe as I thought over the multiple scenarios of how this could go down.

He can hate me.

But he could also love me and that was my motivation.

I thought of coming out videos online...

'Race, gender, religion, sexuality: we're all people and that's it.'

I grabbed his shoulder, causing us to stop and move over to the side of the hall. My heart was doing crazy flips as he glanced at me with curious eyes. The gum in his mouth creating a bubble as he raised his blonde eyebrow at me. I ran a hand through my hair, the one with the LGBT ring that I'd worn hoping that Calum would notice and I wouldn't have to explain myself, "No, do you like, like me?"

"What?" I watched as his pale pink lips formed a confused smile. He was perfect and I loved him but he was dumb as fuck.

I rolled my eyes, sucking in a deep breath. If I pretended it wasn't a big deal, maybe he'd take it as not a big deal too, "I'm gay, Cal." I spat, my nerves getting the best of me as I watched the emotions cross his face.

And then he laughed as I stood there with my eyes squeezed shut, afraid of his reaction once he'd notice I wasn't laughing with him. His laughter died and his hand came to push my shoulder lightly in a 'bro, what's wrong?' kind of way, "You're not joking?"

I nodded, refusing to open my eyes, I didn't see the anger and confusion masked on his face but when I was shoved back into the row of lockers behind me, I knew he wasn't taking it well. My eyes snapped open and they met with blue irises cold as ice.

The hall got quieter as people listened in on the conversation, the venom dripping from every word Calum had said. He was ranting quite loudly and angrily as he normally did but one thing stuck out, "You're a fag?"

Those three words that hurt me more than anything else he could've and would've said. He thought of me as that, nothing more than that. I hated it and I hated myself for telling him.

One word, six letters. Who knew that it would've caused so much pain from those soft lips that a minute ago I was obsessing about.

Faggot.

It cut and it cut deep as I tried to keep my tears at bay. My eyelids refusing to shut no matter the amount of tears that had piled up. It felt like my insides were twisting, my embarrassment suffocating me and rejection crawling up my spine as my heart laid dormant on the floor waiting for him to stomp on it.

My head was hurting from the restraint to keep myself from crying, I felt the weakness in my own voice even before I spoke, "I... Calum-"

"We changed in the same locker room!" He yelled, cutting me off, the vein in his forehead popping. Calum's hands were on my forearms as he slammed me into the locker, the metal jabbing my back painfully as his shoulders shook with the restraint to keep himself from hitting me.

I looked for a sign of any saving grace in his crystal eyes but all I saw was sadness, and betrayal and anger. I braced myself for a hit, "What does that have to-"

Calum looked like he was ready to let me go as my words sunk in and he let go a little, pain hitting my shoulders as the circulation continued in my arms, "How long have you been..." Calum trailed off, letting me go, his fists clenched at his sides.

"Gay? I've known for about three months."

"Three months? Three months?" He was now raising his voice at me, I didn't know if it was because I'd kept it from him or because I was gay, "The hell, Julian?" His nostrils flared, his gaze pointedly on me, "God, you're gay? You're gay. Are you- are you saying you like me?"

I nodded, my words not coming out.

"Why?"

"You're my best fr-"

That must've set him off as his words got even more careless and he let the word slip from his tongue again, "No! I'm the guy that the faggot has a crush on!"

There he went again with that word, and I hate to say it but it had started to numb. It didn't hurt as much as the first time, only a little sting. He was greeting repetitive with his slurs and insults.

"I love you, Calum! I thought you'd feel the same-"

Lifting his hands at me, he pushed me back as I moved closer, my back slamming against the locker even harder than before. My hands came out to catch myself as the pain intensified, "I'm not gay!"

I was losing my plea, losing my conviction and then I couldn't help but think how stupid it was. My reasoning became weak, my tone turning into desperation as I realized how ridiculous I sounded trying to make him love me, "You have to be, you said-"

"I've been fucking your sister, man." Calum laughed in my fade, the crowd erupting in 'oohs' and more laughter, I was officially being clowned for my sexuality by my best friend. He rejected me and preferred my sister over me.

"Jade? You fucked Jade? She's fifteen!"

He laughed, "Well, she bends like she's twenty."

And that was when I lunged at him ignoring the fact that he was bigger than me, more muscular and could most likely kill me. I wasn't shocked when I was spitting out blood as Calum punched me repeatedly, his knuckles hitting my jaw, snapping my head to the side as I tried to at least get some damage in. I was clutching my abdomen as I tried to get him off.

Calum slammed me on the floor, the air being knocked out of me as he hovered over me, his nose bloody and lip busted as his fist swung back again, my head coming up and driving into his knocking him off balance but not enough force to get him off.

I heard rustling and shouts over the camera snapping and sickening crack of my nose as I tried to release his hand holding me down, "Bro, get the hell off of him!"

Suddenly we were being split apart by a slightly bigger girl, the kid, and a few of Calum's wrestling buddies, "Damn it, do we need to fucking jaws of life?"

And as i was released, I looked over, I saw a kid, his features distinct and reminding. He had that kind of face where you've seen someone who he resembled, even though you've never met him.

He kind of looks like-

"Do you honestly find some fucking sick pleasure in beating on gays?" The guy was helping me to my feet as I tried to stand on my feet. He swung my arm around his neck, the pain shooting through my hand and my head feeling liquified.

He'd dragged me to the boy's bathroom before a teacher could notice.

: : :

"You okay?"

I rolled my eyes, the simple action shooting pain through my head. The guy was inspecting my nose as we stood there, his eyes squinted through his glasses, "Peachy."

And that was when he touched it, my head instantly feeling on fire, "Dude, what the hell?" I yelled, jerking away from him as I felt blood rush through my head once again, this time settling in my ears as I could the the redness in the mirror.

He chuckled, running a hand through his curly hair, "It's not broken."

Sitting on the counter, he looked at me before leaning back on it, his back resting against the mirror. We were ditching, I couldn't go to classes like this without being sent to the guidance counselor and I wasn't up for being questioned about my love life.

I valued the silence knowing that once the next day came, my sexuality would be broadcasted and my life wouldn't be quiet for a while.

"I'm Pete by the way." The guys said, his body laid out on the counter, across the sinks, his head laying on the crease of his elbow.

"Julian..." I shrugged as I leaned against the wall, my head tilted back.

"I know," and when I looked at him like he was crazy, he laughed, "I saw you with my brother last weekend. He wouldn't stop smiling about this guy named Jules, said he goes to this school."

"Who's your brother?"

"Paul." He motioned about a foot up higher than himself, "about yey high, has my hair just less bushy, kind of really annoying, and always hangs around these guys with cameras."

That's who he looked like.

A/N:
long enough for ya babes?
I'm not sure if it's good, I've never written a fight scene, bear with me.
Updated: Wed, Feb. 4