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A honeymoon is an opportunity for a couple to learn in understanding one another on another level. It’s a paradise location where you’ll fusion together in beginning your journey as husband and wife, in building a stronger marriage. Don’t miss this opportunity in sharing those precious moments in discovering that climactic moment of ultimate togetherness. Forget your lives away from home and go with your heart.

****
Honeymooners

Mrs Hania.

We’ve been married for a few days now and every-day, my heart has been beating with an audible thud in knowing Kamran is now my husband; I couldn’t be happier. Only, there’s something hanging in the air we both know we need to talk about but out of apprehension, we remain quiet and keep sweeping it under the carpet; too frightened to talk.

Today is the day of our honeymoon. I would have been happy just spending time alone with him, locked away in our bedroom cuddling and getting to know each other by talking about our past but those annoying mystery phone calls I’ve been getting has really been getting me down, not to mention paranoid. Besides, isn’t it all girls dream to have a honeymoon somewhere erotic?

I think being alone with Kamran for two weeks will be good for us. I’m sure of it, and there will undoubtedly be a lot we’ll get to learn about each other, being so far away from family and friends. My sister-in-law Ahlam once told me; it’s the only time you’ll really get to see someone’s true personality; even though, I knew Kamran long before marriage.

Normally, Muslim girls don’t date before marriage and Kamran and I didn’t, we just knew each other because he’s one of my brother Aahil’s closest friend; I’ve known him all my life. I’ve always been in love with him but he’s never openly admitted his feelings towards me. There were times in the past that he used to show meanness to me and I used to always tease him over it.
Pff! Aahil used to always say I was a complicated woman, huh! The check of him but deep down, I know he’s right. I’ve always had an outgoing and outspoken personality and quite often, let things slip out of my mouth without thinking of the consequences. Is that what love does to you?

I’ve always been in love with Kamran but he’s never really shared his true feelings towards me; it hurts, I won’t deny it. In the past, I used to tease him because of it especially when he treated me cruelly. One minute he was sweet; the perfect man and the next, he pushes me away; similarity to hot and cold water.

“Snap out of it Hania. Stop with your rational thoughts. This is an experience all newlywed couples look forward to. Go with the flow.”
“Hey! What’s my gorgeous wife dreaming about, eh?” Kamran unexpectedly said, wrapping his arm around my waist from behind.

“Kamran, you frightened me!” I said, startled. “I thought you were still in the bathroom”
“Nope, right here with you baby, which brings me back to my question, what was my gorgeous wife dreaming about?” he asked again.
“Nothing”

“Oh really, nothing eh?” he said, beginning to tickle me.

“Kamran! Please stop! Nooo… please! You know I’m too ticklish… hahaha!”

“Tell me?”

“I was thinking of… please stop! Please” I pleaded. “Thank you. I was thinking of me and you on our honeymoon”
“Is that so, eh? About what exactly, hmm?” he replied, tightening his hold on me.
“Nothing, just how romantic it’ll be. Just me and you.” I said shyly.

“I agree. It’ll be a perfect opportunity for us both to spend time alone. Away from civilisation and troubles. Just me and you, building the base of our strong and happy marriage Insha’Allah.” he confirmed, pecking my cheek with a kiss.
Glancing around our bedroom, he asked, “hey, are we all packed?”

“Mmhm. All packed and ready to go and I can’t wait.”

“Great. Oh! by the way, I’ve booked us some excursions, so it’ll be a mixed activity honeymoon. Is that okay? I can always cancel them if you’re not”

“No, that’s fine. I’m sure it’ll be fun. Besides, I’m not one for sitting around by the beach all day, soaking up the sun. It’s great to see another county as much as you can. Will you tell me where we’re going yet?”

“Nuh-uh. It’s a surprise until the captain or the flight-attendant brings it up on the aeroplane. Until then, my lips are sealed.”
“You are so cruel.” I said folding my arms in a childish annoyance. “Aha! What about at the airport? Check-in and when boarding the plane will have tale-tale signs of our destination” I stated proudly.
“Ahh, yes, you’ve got me there. Do you know wifey, you have a very persistent mind?”
“My family tells me the same thing since I’ve been a minor.” I said smiling up at him.

****

Finding out that Kamran was taking me to Dubai had me jumping for joy into his arms. I’ve always loved the United Arab Emirates, especially it being an Islamic state. What can be better?

Boarding Emirates; one of the best airliners in the sky and that’s just my personal opinion, I stood back and watched my husband elevate our hand luggage into the overhead lockers. I don’t know what it is but just watching him do a simple energetic thing like lifting, causing his muscles to flex, excites me greatly.

“Hey, what’s that look for?” he asked amusingly.

“Huh? what look?” I said, shying away
“Haha, is wifey become shy all of a sudden?” he joked

“Window seat or…”

“Okay, okay, let’s change the subject” he cut in “but just for the record, I look at you the same way when you do yoga at home” he declared, raising his eyebrows flirtatiously.
“Kamran!” I said, slapping his arm immaturely
“What? I’m only being honest” he said smirking. “You can have the window seat; I don’t mind either way”

“Thank you.” I replied, keeping my head down to hide my beaming smile.
Typical of men, Kamran immediately got busy with the inflight entertainment, while I sat back and took in my surrounding and thought of our what awaits us in Dubai.
It’s a shame honeymoons are just a short escapable place away from home, somewhere to go with your spouse to relax and clear our minds 24/7

Why can’t holidaying be a real-lie environment, which we can experience every day? Wouldn’t the world be a happier place?
I glanced over at Kamran and caught him already staring back at me with passionate eyes. Smiling, he placed his hand over mine and squeezed it affectionately.

“We’re not yet in Dubai and you already look relaxed” he startedand I looked down shyly, some alone time with him I only prayed silently and here my wish is being granted.

“Do I? I guess I am.” I said, intertwining our hands together as I leaned my head onto his shoulders and felt him kiss my head.
I love him. I’ve loved him ever since the first moment I laid my eyes on him; some would call it love at first sight and I guess it was. All I knew was that my knees would wobble like jelly whenever I saw him.

I remember that first day clearly, it was a beautiful hot summer’s day and my brother Aahil was outside in the garden with a man I’ve never met before. I later found out his name was Kamran. They were playing a board game called Carrom that consist of 9 white and 9 black disc per player and 1 red disc which is the Queen. 2 or 4 people can play this game and the goal is, with only one hand, target a disc into an area in the middle of the board before your opponent. It’s an enjoyable game but one that requires patience and aim.

Opting to sit somewhere discreet, I watched them both play from a distance; taking in their laughter with each flicker of the disk. I adore my brother and nothing makes me more contented than seeing him exultant but Kamran, he intrigued me. Every single movement from when his lips tilted upwards to smile to the point where the laughter lines around his eyes creased; my eyes followed and lingered.

I know we’re both craving a deeper connection but something is holding me back. Is it shyness, that I can’t seem to step away from? I know it’s one of the main obstacles.
Is it the untold and hidden truth of the nuisance calls I’ve disturbingly been getting?

Is it the fact that Kamran hasn’t yet admitted he loved me? Why does it feel he hasn’t opened up to me yet?
Or is it the fact I might not be good enough for him in the bedroom?
All I know is that there’s no hiding the fact that we’re both on the same page in wanting to develop a stronger connection with one another.
Ya Allah! Please guide me through this chapter in my marriage.

****

The hotel that Kamran took us to was called The Palm Dubai Resort and it was absolutely stunning. Anybody watching me now wouldn’t ever believe I was a married woman in her twenties because I was jumping around like a school girl with a wide grin on my face. I was so overly excited and happy. The location resembled a place in the Maldives my parents took me and Aahil when we were younger; breath-taking was the best way to describe the whole scenery around me. A perfect place for honeymooners without a doubt.
“Hahahaha, you should see yourself. Everyone is staring at you, presumably thinking you’ve never been outdoors before” he said laughing.

I stopped and stared at him. He held a sparkle in his eyes, as well as a satisfied look; clearly visible on his face upon seeing my happiness shine through.
“I’m sorry. I just can’t help it” I said while staring around, “it’s just… just so perfect Kamran, thank you so much” I praised speechless.

“Anything for you my love” he replied, placing a quick kiss on my nose.

“Kamran! Don’t they frown on nose kissing here in Dubai?” I asked, looking around me paranoid.

“Haha, a lot of Arabs do it. Chill. They treat it merely like a handshake here, so relax, it’s unlikely we’ll get arrested for it Hania. They see the gesture as a no intimacy involvement.” He said, looping his hand through my arm and following the bellboy to our room.

“Ya Allah! Kamran! You’ve really gone all out with this location Masha’Allah”

“Oh, come on baby, what do you take me for?” he commented, slightly offended. “It’s our honeymoon, you deserve the best; we both do.”

“It’s just…”

“Shh. Wait a sec,” he said, placing a finger over my lips.
Seeing to the bellboy, he thanked him and tipped him generously with 10 AED before he left us alone.

“Come.” He said, taking my hand and tugging me excitedly towards the balcony.
“Oooh wow! Kamran, I’m seriously loss for words. Panorama views? This must’ve costed a fortune. Seriously, I’m loss for words” I said dumbfounded.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” he nodded.
“Mmhm” I nodded; leaning my head on his shoulders, which in return he placed his arms around my shoulders and squeezed me tight.

We stood staring at the view for what seemed like hours just taking in the view of the bay before us. It was so surreal and peaceful. An ideal place for the both of us and the design of the pool further to the right was just unbelievable.

Kamran decided to take a quick shower while I began unpacking our suitcases. Hanging and folding away our clothing and laying out our toiletries in their rightful places. While moving around like a busy-bee, I pondered about husbands and wives who take showers together, I don’t think I can ever go to that level, it’s just too embarrassing. Just the mere thought of him seeing me naked had me blushing; turning my cheeks a deep red.

We’ve been married for over a week now but we haven’t actually done it; if you know what I mean. On the night of our wedding, he considerably and unselfishly told me he wouldn’t touch me sexually unless I’m ready and I was really grateful for that.

Don’t get me wrong, we’ve lightly kissed and cuddled; that’s it. Will we unite as one during our honeymoon?

“Ya Allah!” I mused, fanning my cheeks with my hands.

“You okay Hania?” noticing my red cheeks.
Yeah make fun of me now, you must be enjoying every moment. I thought .

“The air conditioning is on but if you’re still feeling a little flustered from the heat, I could turn it up a nudge or two. Or, if you’re finished with the unpacking and all, go and take your shower. It certainly refreshed me” Kamran said coming out of the bathroom. I didn’t even hear him as he crept up behind me.

“Kamran! Your naked!” I said covering my eyes Immediately I couldn't even open again, dam him for making me feel this way.

He was standing before me with only a bath towel wrapped around his waist. He was so well-defined. Tanned, muscular, strong and in great shape; not surprising as he spends a lot of time at the gym keeping himself fit; not to mention, he’s conscious of what he eats to keep his body in that state.
“What? can your husband not come out of the shower unless he’s fully clothed?” he asked light-hearteningly.

“I…”

“Come on Hania, how will you react when I decide to take a swim at the pool with just swimming trunks on if you can’t bare to see me with a towel wrapped around me, eh” he asked, pouting his lips like a child.
“It’s just inappropriate, that’s all” I stated, looking away blushful.
“Inappropriate? Hania, I’m your husband, not a stranger. There’s nothing at all inappropriate with all this” he said, directing his hands towards his body and gesturing from top to bottom.

“I guess… it’s just that… never mind. I’m taking a shower.” And rushed in there locking the door behind me. I could’ve sworn I heard him laughing from the other side of the door.

“Phew! I can’t believe that just happened. Now I understand what Ahlam meant when she said, wait till it’s your turn”
I must remember to apologise to her. I should never have joked about my brother waiting for her on their Nikkah, (wedding night) and a lot of other teasing moments. If I knew it was this embarrassing, I would never have behaved in that way. I must learn to keep my big mouth shut in future. Am I being punished for my cheekiness towards them during their early days of marriage?
Turning the showerhead to cold, I stepped under the walk-in-shower and cooled myself down; not from the heat of Dubai but from the heat of passion towards my husband.

“Eeeek!” I silently screamed, as the cold water touched my body, even though it felt good and instantly cooled me down.
Is it normal for a girl to feel this way after marriage? Something must be wrong with me to walk away from a drop-dead gorgeous looking man; who happens to be my husband. I should be falling into his arms; shouldn’t I?

Think about it, sexual intercourse is the next big step in our marriage. Is it too much to ask for it to be special?
“Hey girl! He’s brought you to Dubai, how much more special do you want it to be?” my inner-self screamed back at me.
“I know, I know, you’re right, can you please stop telling me off”
What’s happening here, am I now talking to myself?

“Damn girl, you have a hot guy at the other end of that door; get yourself out there and fusion your bodies together. What are you waiting for? Get a grip on yourself!”

“ALRIGHT! Leave me alone. Mom, why didn’t you prewarn me how hard this was going to be” I cried into my hands.
“Hey, Hania, you okay in there?” Kamran yelled through the door.
“Huh-uh, I’ll be out soon.” I replied.
“Okay. Thought I heard you calling out, that’s all.”

“Err no, I’m fine.”

“Did I yell out loud? Did Kamran hear me talking to myself? Oh dear, I’m never gonna live this day down.”

Stepping away from the shower, I was so relieved and grateful that the hotel catered each guest with luxurious bathrobes because I rushed into the bathroom with nothing but the clothes I had on.
“Hey! Why didn’t Kamran wear his? The cheeky so-and-so.” I mused.
“About time. I’m starving, how about you?” he asked, turning to stare back at me from the balcony.

I was so relieved to see he was fully dressed in casual navy linen shorts that reached his knees and a crisp white short sleeved shirt, which he left hanging loose and a pair of blue organic cotton Timberland summer boat shoes. Damn he’s looks so dreamy.
“Hania? come back to earth baby” he said clicking his fingers in front of my face.
“What? Oh, Erm sorry…” I said, embarrassingly, realising I was drooling over him.
“Erm, let me get ready. I’ll be as quick as I can.” Turning away hurriedly to get ready.
Looking over my shoulder, I noticed he was still staring at me.

“Are you going to keep staring?”

“I can’t help it, your beautiful and it’s nice seeing you out of normal clothing and just in a bathrobe, knowing…”
“Nuh-uh, don’t even go there Kamran” I said pointing my finger at him like a mother would her child.
“Hahahah, you know me so well.” He said turning away to lean over the balcony again.
Men, they’re all the same. One thing on their mind always. Knowing I was naked beneath the bathrobe obviously doing things to him like seeing him in a towel was doing things to him.

Once my hair was blow dried, I began moisturising my body with my favourite jasmine oil and noticed Kamran was still leaning over the balcony; arms crossed over the edge, lost in his deep thoughts again. Quickly picking up the dress I cherry-picked to wear tonight and underwear, I locked myself back in the bathroom to moisturise parts of my body I didn’t want Kamran to see.

“Don’t even say it! I know, I should be out there but I just can’t, okay? I don’t know why. It’s obvious I’m not ready to bear all yet or maybe I’m just a discreet girl who’s learnt to shield her body from others; especially a man, even my husband” I said to myself; placing my head into my hands, like it’ll stop the sound of my own thoughts.

“Just leave me alone, it’s all too nerve whacking?”

I know it sounds like I’m being a little senile by speaking to myself but it’s my way of dealing with nerves when I feel like I’m stepping into something new and way out of my territory. It sometimes helps me rationalise a situation.
The dress I selected to wear was a modest boho style dress with ruffled hems and bishop sleeves; baby blue in colour, with an all-over print of white roses. It was a cool wearing dress, which was perfect to wear in this temperature.

Exiting the bathroom, Kamran was no longer by the balcony but instead laying on the bed with his arms outstretched behind his head and his knees bent up and his mind in a faraway place. His mobile was at the end of the bed like he threw it aside. I was hoping I wouldn’t get to see this despondency from him while we were on our honeymoon. I wanted this to be an unforgettable experience but it seems wherever we go, his troubles either follows him or he drags it along.
“Hey,” I said softly. “If you’d prefer to stay in, I really don’t mind.”
Snapping himself out of his thoughts, he sprung off the bed and said, “heck no. This holiday is about you and me and nobody’s going to spoil it for us.”
Realising what he said, he quickly added “You ready to go?”
“Erm yeah, just need to put my hijab on and a light dusting of makeup that’s all. Ten minutes max.”
He was still miles away with his thoughts; I wish he wasn’t.
“Hey, you sure everything’s okay? You said, nobody’s going to spoil our holiday, who were you talking about Kamran?” I asked warily.

“Yeah, yeah. Everything is a good baby and it was just a figure of speech.”
No, he wasn’t and I can tell he was lying but why? What is he keeping from me?
“You look beautiful by the way baby.”
“Thank you. You too” I said putting on a brave smile.
Fifteen minutes later, Kamran closed our hotel door behind us when I heard the distant ringing of my mobile. I’m sure he heard it too but we both looked at each other and decided to ignore it, which I was relieved about.
“Whoever it is, if it’s urgent, they can reach me on my mobile” he stated. “I have mine with me. There’s no need to bring both along.”

“Okay, yeah, that sounds good.”
And it really did sound good, as I did not want to receive any interfering calls tonight or any other night for that matter. I knew it was an impossible ask because the moment we arrive back to our hotel room later tonight, they’ll be a few missed calls from an unknown number that’s going to spoil the rest of my evening.
I have hated my mobile lately. I hated the fact that I’ve been receiving these annoying calls. What made it annoying was nobody spoke. It has been freaking me out and I didn’t know how to tell Kamran without worrying him. He seems troubled himself lately and I don’t want to stress him out further.

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