< he said he loves you >

< but will he really >

< when he finds out the truth about me? >

< don't count on it >

< you're much more messed up than he could ever imagine >

< look at you! >

< you're such a sad excuse of a human being >

.

.

.

Mirasol now looked forward to days ahead of her. Rather than worrying much about the voice in her head, she could spend her time thinking about future dates with Oh Sehun. It made her insides fluttery, and she absolutely engulfs herself in it. She was already feeling more at ease nowadays, but to actually have a smile on her face and express genuine happiness? It was something Minseok, Minhae, and Doctor Ahn were looking forward to.

"You look incredibly happy, Mirasol-sshi," Doctor Ahn pointed out after a few minutes since beginning their second session of the month. (It used to be a two times a week, but the doctor decided to lessen the meetings after seeing improvements in Mira's health). "Did something happen in the past week and a half?"

"I've told you about Oh Sehun."

The doctor nodded. There had been a couple days when instead of talking about the usual, hard-hitting stuff, Doctor Ahn listened to Mirasol talk about the particular boy. After hearing his name pop times prior, he had to inquire who this Sehun was to Mirasol. Even though she was shy talking about it before, she ended up spilling everything about him.

Her time with him. The fights they had. The utter hatred she had. And the love she now held.

"I saw him again," Mirasol uttered with a giddy smile. "Johnny actually knew him and he set it up like that. So Sehun and I were able to talk and... he told me he loves me."

"He did?"

The half-filipino nodded. "Yes and I feel like I'm floating in the clouds. We were able to have a couple dates already throughout this week since we haven't seen each other in so long."

"I'm really happy for you, Mirasol-sshi."

"Thank you!"

"He sounds like a really reliable man... but I'm assuming you haven't told him about your disorder, right?"

Mirasol's joyous expression wavered.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to degrade your happiness but having a disorder as such... we've been at it for a year but really, it can take even longer for it to fully go away. And even if it does, it can always relapse." Doctor Ahn let out a sigh while he adjusted his glasses. "You've told me he had seen you altered already. I must already have an inkling what you might have."

"That scares me, doctor..."

"I know it does." He reached over and patted her shoulder. "But if you really love him and trust him with your life like he did on that cruise, he needs to know. If he doesn't already know, then he has to know soon."

< yeah, just try to tell him about me and we'll see >

"Mirasol-sshi, you went quiet for a bit. Did you just hear her voice in your head?"

Mirasol merely nodded at this.

"It seems to me that Sehun keeps affecting you... I don't want to pressure you on anything but I just want you to understand that I'm saying these things for your well-being and health. You don't really know but as much as you are in a very good mood right now, you're also at war with yourself because you want to tell him but you're afraid of the outcome. Has Jovelyn been talking to you lately?"

"Y-Yes... but I don't even dare to reply back."

"Okay, good... You know, soon enough, we might even have to invite him to these sessions, Mirasol-sshi."

The idea frightened her more. "W-We do?"

"Yes, he had helped you break out of that loop you've been living for 6 years. You're getting better but I believe we need to finally take more steps. With Sehun... with your parents."

Her parents still were a sore subject to talk about even with as much progress she made. They know now. They know that their daughter was alive and know her whereabouts ever since Minseok brought her. It was around the beginning of her appointments when Mira had tried to contact them, to hear their voices again. But every time she did that, she would get tremors and her headaches would be incredibly painful for her. And every time, Jovelyn almost took over.

So at that time, Doctor Ahn refrained her from contacting her parents. As sad as it made her, she understood. It was to early into her therapy. She knew how much her parents impacted her, even when it wasn't intentional. She had put that on herself.

But Minseok and Minhae have kept them updated.

It was, at least, something for her parents to rely on.

And from her cousins have told her, even now that they know about her disorder, they still love her.

"Mirasol-sshi, you need this to help you. I know the possible consequences might be dire but I believe telling Oh Sehun about your condition is the next step... then as a final step, talking to your parents fully."

The girl was trembling at the very thought. She finally could freely love Sehun again but...

That could all change.

"You don't have to do it soon. Think it over first, and we can discuss it more in our next session. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, that's fine..."

"I'm sorry again. Do try to spend more time with him when you can, but know that there will be a limit how far your mind could refrain from keeping him in the dark."

"R-Right, I understand."

Doctor Ahn checked his watch. "We can stop our session here today."

"Okay..."

Mirasol bid her goodbyes to the doctor and left the room. She just wished that appointment had turned out far different.

She knew the end goal was.

She knew that eventually that she had to tell Sehun and talk to her parents.

But the fear was beginning to eat up inside her.

< just you try. i'm itching to find out, dear sister >

No.

You're no sister of mine. Ate Annalise was. And she'll be the only sister I had.

Rounding the corner of the hallway, she finally reached the lobby of the hospital. However, she spotted something that made her nearly stop in her tracks. Eyes finally met hers and they crinkled, showing a smile. And in his hands were a bouquet of flowers. She had nearly forgotten that she did end up telling him the hospital she had been going to.

"Mira."

"Sehun," Mirasol breathed out as she approached the man. Oh Corp's vice president handed over the bouquet and Mira quietly marveled at its beauty. Her lips quirked into the biggest smile and she beamed over at Sehun. "Thank you, these are gorgeous—"

"Not as gorgeous as you though."

The very cheesy comment broke the couple down into flustered dorks. It was so amusing to see Sehun act in this way when he usually has such a cool demeanor. It didn't help when visitors and employees who had been waiting in the lobby had overheard and aww'd at them too.

"Sorry, that just came out naturally," Sehun murmured, running his fingers through his chocolate hair. "But ah, I'm kind of hoping we can go grab dinner together."

"That sounds wonderful to me."

And without the girl expecting it, Sehun had grabbed onto her hand and interlaced their fingers. This shot Mira to the heavens above, the act so sudden but heart fluttering. They left the hospital hand in hand, both feelings incredibly happy to be with the person they love.

Mirasol couldn't see herself with any other person. Deep in her heart, she wanted to tell him herself about her disorder while in the high of their happiness. It was a never-ending battle inside, Jovelyn only fueling her more.

Didn't her doctor say she could wait on it?

Didn't she say herself she wanted to be selfish for a bit longer?

"Sehun-ah..."

"Yes?" Their eyes met again.

They stood just at the sidewalk, outside of the hospital. And out of the blue, Mirasol blurted out, "Jovelyn never existed."

There was a silence. She could see Sehun trying to process what was happening, what she said. Mirasol repeated herself, "Jovelyn never existed. It was me the whole time." His eyebrows furrowed and Mira felt her whole body go into overdrive. Was this... bad?

"I have dissociative identity disorder, Sehun."

It was like the world stood still around them.

Was Mirasol breathing? She wasn't sure.

"Okay."

Mira blinked in surprise. "Okay?"

"Let's go somewhere comfortable and with food. And we can talk more." Sehun grabbed onto her hand again and led her further down the sidewalk.

Mirasol could only stare at Sehun's broad back as he pulled her away from the hospital, her eyes prickled with tears. That wasn't the reaction she was expecting at all and she was so damn relieved.

And what's even better?

Not once had Jovelyn's voice was heard in her mind.

Silence.

Stunned silence.