-loserclub

astrophiles-

Ralph was starting on his third beer before he realized how gone Lilly was. Or maybe he had already realized she was far past tipsy but he didn’t want to admit that he should slow her down because drunk Lilly, leaning on Ralph’s shoulder and giggling in his ear, was just about the best thing he’d seen in weeks.

Ralph was unsurprised to find Lilly was a happy drunk. He was slightly surprised to find that she was cuddly, though. Lilly was relatively touch adverse in normal day-to-day sober life, Ralph had caught onto that within the first few days working with her. But drunk Lilly was leaning heavily on him, his head on Ralph’s shoulder, her body moving closer every chance she got to fill a gap between the two of them. As the time approached quarter past nine, Ralph had no doubt Lilly would be in his lap by the end of the night if he did any less than fending her off with a stick.

“Beer’s boring, Lilly, let’s get something more fun!” a much more drunk Cisco Ramon said as he grabbed Lilly’s hand and tried to pull her out of the booth and off of Ralph. He actually succeeded. For a moment. Then Lilly came crashing back down, body hitting the booth, head landing on Ralph’s thigh. He was expecting a groan or a yelp, but when he looked down at her was just staring back up at him, big eyes wide and joyful, long brown hair messy and in her face. Ralph reached down and brushed a few hairs away from her eyes. He knew the smile on his face was far too soft and caring to be giving to a woman he wasnt even suppose to like, but he didn’t necessarily care. Lilly Snart made him not care.

“I think she had enough for tonight, Cisco,” he said, not looking up from the woman of his dreams who had, quite literally, fallen into his lap. Lilly kept looking back. “In fact,” He continued to brush away stray hairs, tucking them behind her ear, “I think it’s time to take her home.”

Lilly pouted at that, cute and petulant, but she didn’t say a word in argument. Which was how Ralph knew how right he was. Lilly never did as Ralph said without a fight.

“Are you sure you’re okay to drive?” Barry, who was sober of course, asked from across the table. Ralph smiled and nodded.

“I’m good to go. Stopped drinking when I realized I need to take this one home sooner rather than later.” he said, ignoring the fact that what he said was true, and he had done so completely subconsciously, instead he poked Lilly’s side. Ralph didn’t have the words to describe the emotion that bloomed within him when Lilly let out a surprised squeal that quickly shifted into a loud laugh.

But if he were to guess, he’d have to admit it was something akin to love.

Lilly squirmed on the bench seat, laughing. Lilly’s laughing stopped suddenly, her eyes opening to stare up at Ralph again. Her hair had gone back to ruffled, all of Ralph’s hard work gone, a deep blush had risen high on his cheeks from her laughter.

“Home?” she asked, her voice almost too quiet to be heard over the din of the bar. The smile on Ralph’s face had yet to slip and was only growing more loving by the second, with each movement of the woman in his lap.

“Yeah, Snart, let’s get you home.”

Lilly nodded, struggling to stand, provoking a laugh from the team that Ralph had almost forgotten was present. He could feel a blush of his own taking over his face.

Eventually, Barry took pity on the struggling woman and got up to give her a hand. He was thanked for his effort as she leaned in and placed a quick kiss on her best friends cheek. Barry, as patient as ever, just smiled and ruffled Lilly’s already messy hair. His tolerant reaction must have inspired the drunk woman, however, because, for the next several seconds, Ralph watched as Lilly stumbled around the booth, giving each team mate a kiss on the cheek and a cheesy smile before returning to Ralph’s side.

“Drive safe, you two,” Caitlin said, a highly amused expression on her face. Ralph nodded, wrapping an arm around Lilly as the woman wobbled concerningly. He waved to the team and started to lead Lilly away from the table when- “And Ralph,” Ralph looked over his shoulder to see Cait’s amusement had slipped into something more of a worried expression. “Please don’t leave her alone.”

Ralph nodded. “Of course,” he said. Then he turned once again and led a stumbling Lilly Snart from the bar.

~ ~ ~

Lilly was about ten times more grumpy by the time they got to the car. She had continued to pout, her arms crossed over her chest both in defiance and against the cold. But she hadn’t said a word, much to Ralph’s discomfort.

Ralph was not used to being near a quiet Lilly Snart. He was used to Lilly ranting, used to her spouting off facts and interrupting at random intervals, used to her humming in agreement as if she had to have an input in every conversation. But he was not used to silence.

As he put his keys in the ignition, after more or less lifting Lilly into the passenger side, he paused. Turning to lean against the driver side door, Ralph didn’t bother to try to be stealthy as he stared her down. Now that they were alone and Lilly’s quietness had become evident, Ralph realized that she had slowly gotten less and less talkative as the night had gone on. In fact, the drunker Lilly got, the less she spoke.

Lilly either felt Ralph’s eyes on her or noticed that he had yet to turn on the car, her eyes lifting from where she was staring at Ralph’s hand that had dropped from the keys in the ignition to his thigh.

“You alright, Sna-” Lilly cut him off, her head tilting to the side like a curious puppy.

“When you drive with your dates do you put your hand on their thigh?” she asked.

Ralph, more or less too stunned to answer, looked down at his thigh. “Uh…”

“I see it all the time on TV, they mention it a lot in books too, but I’ve never experienced it personally. I mean you Know. I didnt really have much luck With relationships. Is it something that the media embellishes? Is it something that-” Now it was Ralph’s turn to interrupt because, as glad as he was that Lilly was talking, he did not need to hear about the woman's experiences with… Thigh touching.

“Slow down, slow down. You’ve been quiet the whole night, are you okay?” Lilly hummed.

“Yeah, just, enjoying the quiet.” she said, shooting Ralph a cheesy smile. A smile Ralph was almost too distracted by to process Lilly’s words, but when he did, his brow furrowed.

“Snart, it was loud as hell in there, are you sure-”

Not quiet in there,” Lilly said, lifting a hand and tapping at the side of her head. “Quiet in here.” The smile was still on her face as she blinked, slowly and sleepily, as if she was struggling to keep her eyes open. “Not used to the quiet… It’s nice, not to have everything happening all at once. Never knew alcohol could do that.” And Ralph knew that he should focus on the mental effect the alcohol was having on his... friend, the wording that made it seem like she could become seriously dependent on it, just to shut up her brain. But it was what Lilly said at the end that caught and held his attention.

“Snart, have you never been really drunk before?” He asked, voice quiet but still too loud for the silent car. Lilly blinked again, processing the question, his eyes dilated by the lowlight and alcohol in his system.

“I haven’t, no. Well. One time. When I Was around 16. I think. Haven't drank  anything after that” Ralph’s stomach dropped.

There he was with this woman, his Team member, his Kind of friend, totally and completely wasted for the first time in her life. Lilly hadn’t wanted to go out that night, she hadn’t wanted to drink, hadn’t wanted to get drunk. But Ralph had made her. He had pressured her into doing something that Ralph should have noticed she wasn’t comfortable With. And he had noticed, he realized, looking back.

He just hadn’t cared.

“Why didn’t you tell me you hadn’t been drunk before?” He asked. Lilly sighed, sinking in on herself a bit as her smile slipped. She ran a hand through her messy hair.

“I’m twenty-eight, Ralph,” she said. She had never called him by his first Name before, but Ralph decided that then was not the time nor place to think about that. “Everyone’s been drunk by the time they’re twenty-eight. I was embarrassed, I…” Lilly turned her face away, looking out the passenger side window. “I didn’t want you to have even more of a reason to think of me as strange. I was afraid you’d think I was… inexperienced.”

“You are inexperienced, Snart,” Ralph said, regretting it immediately when the woman flinched. “It’s not a bad thing.” he continued quickly. “You and that big brain of yours were just too focused on surviving your childhood. And didnt on Stuff That I did When I Was young. Like drinking irresponsible and, honestly, concerning amounts of alcohol.” He waited a moment, listening for Lilly’s answer, hoping she would turn to look at him again. Lilly sighed.

“Snart, look at me,” he said eventually. After a moment, Lilly did. “You have no reason to be embarrassed. Inexperience, it’s not… We’re all inexperienced at one point or another, and, sure, maybe you’re a little older than most people when they first get really drunk, but don’t worry about me thinking you’re childish because of that. In fact, I find it kind of charming…”

“Really?” Lilly asked, finally speaking after another painful moment of silence. Ralph nodded.

“And if there’s anything else you’ve never done and don’t feel safe to try alone, I’ll be there to protect you, no judgement guaranteed. Just please tell me when we’re trying something new.” Ralph worried that maybe he had let too much emotion slip out, that he showed Lilly too much of what he felt for her. But Lilly just nodded, no suspicious look that Ralph was sure he’d get if she were sober.

“Thanks, Ralph,” she said, her smile making its way back onto her face.

“Anytime, Snart.”

With that, Ralph started the car.

~ ~ ~

Ralph decided on bringing Lilly back to his place since he had to keep an eye on her anyway. The decision was only made easier when Lilly fell asleep in the passenger seat just before Ralph realized he had never actually been to Lilly’s apartment before and didn’t even know what street she lived on.

He pulled into the reserved parking spot for building residents and turned to wake Lilly by shaking her shoulder. Spencer groaned and snuggled deeper into her seat, rubbing her face against the leather. It was cute enough that Ralph almost decided to let her sleep a little longer, but a bed would be far more comfortable.

“Come on, sleeping beauty, time to get inside.” he said, shaking Lilly a little harder. Lilly opened her eyes, looking at Ralph as a sleepy smile spread across her lips, her earlier distress and unhappiness forgotten during her nap. She rubbed a hand across the side of her face, and nodded.

Ralph spent the next several minutes maneuvering Lilly out of his car and through the front door of his building, waving to his doorman as who tried to hide his smile as Lilly said, quiet loudly, ‘ooh fancy, you have a doorman?’ Ralph just sighed and pushed Lilly into the elevator.

The rest of the way after that was relatively easy. Lilly, who was finally fully awake, seemed to have gained some energy and soberness from her nap, at least enough to stand on her own two feet and walk without stumbling, and was now walking on her own instead of being half-carried by Ralph. Ralph still kept a watchful eye on her but was thankful when he was able to unlock his door without having to worry about Lilly falling on her face.

He didnt even Look away for a second But lilly was already in his Apartment. Walking around, probably Walking against Walls until she found what she Was looking for. The bedroom. When Ralph came into the room, He chuckled. Lilly was having a hard time, trying to get of her leather jacket and Shirt. "Will you look at me or maybe help me?", she looks at him and pouts. He walks over to her and Lifts her Shirt over her head, looking at the ceiling, instead of her. It Was silent for a few seconds until she whined again. "I need help again"

"You will so murder me tomorrow...",he mumbled while looking at the ceiling while helping her out of the bra. "Thank you!", she says in a happy voice before browsing trough Ralph’s closet, pulling out a Shirt, fiddling With it But actually pulling it about her head without help.

She basically jumped at the bed, while pulling her pants of and hiding unser the blanket. Ralph just looked at her. "I'm gonna... Sleep on the Couch.", He said, turning around. "G'nigh", He Heard her mumble and quietly chuckled to himself. "Just don't kill me When you wake up tomorrow, Alright?"