He couldn't go home after leaving the hospital, he couldn't bear to set foot in that house. Not now, Frank had thought to himself as he drove, trying to wipe his eyes on his arm in order to actually see the road. He had just wanted to do one thing and one thing alone, and that involved finding a bar somewhere and drinking himself into a stupor. He hadn't stayed long at the bar. Frank had just wanted some peace and quiet while he drank alone, drinking to his friend who was no longer of this world. That thought alone had broken his heart into more pieces than breaking up with Ryan. He may have felt alone when he left Ryan, but now he felt completely alone because his friend who had taken him under her wing was now gone. Dead, the bitter truth still sinking in a bit slower when Frank was drinking his Jack and ginger.

He never got his peace thanks to some drunk guy who chose to sit next to him at the bar, wanting to strike up a slurred conversation with him. Frank insisted that he wasn't in the mood for talking, but the drunkard still pushed, nudging at him and trying to coax him into some conversation about ice hockey. Frank was not in the mood, fighting back tears while he sipped his drink. The guy just wouldn't leave him alone and as much as Frank just wanted to shout at him, he didn't have the energy to do it. In drunk annoyance, the older man gave up trying to talk to him, but what he muttered to Frank before he sauntered off, that's what felt like a sudden punch to the gut for him, "Jeez, asshole, who died?"

Frank left after that, leaving his unfinished drink on the bar as he stumbled from his seat, biting back a sob. The tears stung and blinded him while he fought with his car keys, trying to get the godforsaken door open so he could just drive somewhere. Anywhere. He just wanted to be alone with his thoughts and maybe a bottle of something to numb his aching heart. The liquor store had definitely been the next port of call, but sitting in the car park of a closed book store, drinking a small bottle of Jack Daniels that really did taste disgusting by itself. That didn't have the same appeal as Frank first thought it would and drowning his sorrows suddenly didn't feel like the right thing to do. Passing out in his car after drinking too much was probably not the best thing to do, either. Being alone made him feel like all he could do was cry and he would have no one there to help him. No one to tell him that one day everything was going to be okay all over again.

Frank swiped his card against the door, hoping and praying that someone- Anyone- was still in the office. It was dark' it didn't look like there was a single light on/ The only way he would know straight away was if he went around the back and looked in through the windows, but that would have looked suspicious. Even with the alcohol that had his brain in a fuzz, he wasn't in the mood for sneaking around. He just wanted some company, even if it was some random colleague from his office. He knew exactly who he wanted to see, but with how his day had been going thus far, he didn't have his hopes very high.

The whole office was in darkness. He walked down the main hall, seeing a few computer monitors still on, but there was no sign of life in the whole place. No sound, no movement at all. Frank snuck his head round into his own office, seeing Gerard's door. Nothing. More darkness. He wasn't here and Frank's heart sunk in his chest; this had been it. It was either going to be Gerard or Ryan and Frank had gone to look for Gerard first because he really didn't want to have to choose his ex just because he needed someone to be there for him. But, what if Ryan didn't want to be there for him? What if he didn't want to be a shoulder for which Frank was meant to cry? Or what if he did? What if Ryan was willing to take him back in with open arms and forget everything that had happened? Frank knew he was vulnerable, and despite the scary idea of going to Ryan first, he didn't want to make a mistake that he was going to end up regretting.

Frank walked down into the main room with all the computers, looking over everything before he sniffed, trying to hold it together. Frank reached into his pants, going for his phone. He wondered if he should at least text Ryan first to let him know that he wasn't okay and that he needed someone to be there for him. Frank remembered that Ryan didn't care too much for Jamia and that she was far too close to him for Ryan's liking, but still, was he really going to keep hold of that stupid problem when she had just died? Frank hoped not as he fought back more tears, opening up his messages, beginning to type out Ryan's number because he no longer had it on his phone. Thank god he still remembered it as he started to type out his message to him.

"Frank?"

Frank jumped, a wobbled yelp leaving him when he heard the voice coming from behind him. He spun around quickly, sniffing to hide the fact that he had been crying, trying to look at lot sharper than he actually was, to see who was talking to him. The voice that calmed him and scared the shit out of him all at the same time.

"Sir," Frank breathed a sigh of relief, seeing Gerard standing in the kitchen doorway, looking at him with confusion plastered across his face. It was late' close to eleven o'clock and, somehow, Gerard was still here. He wasn't where Frank had assumed that he would be; at home in bed with his wife. No, thank God, he was still in the office. Frank deleted his message to Ryan, pocketing his phone, "I-I was hoping you were still here but, I assumed that you'd... Gone home."

"I was about to," Gerard told him as he walked into the room, putting his hands in his pockets, "I've just been shutting down everything for the night- Frank, what are you doing here? It's late. Shouldn't you be with your friend in the hospital right now?"

That question hit Frank hard. The last time he had spoken to Gerard, he was running off to be with Jamia while she gave birth. Gerard had given him the opportunity to be there for her. And he had been there for her right to the very end. The question brought it all back, screaming through his head, the memory of her not responding while he was holding Jamia's daughter in his arms. He was an uncle, but in the process of becoming an uncle, he lost his best friend. As much as Frank was holding it together right now, he was also losing grip of it all again and unraveling in front of Gerard, his bottom lip quivering as his eyes started to sting.

"Are you okay?" Gerard asked, watching Frank nod as he bit down on his bottom lip and immediately looked down, whimpering. Gerard took an uneasy step closer, "Did something happen?"

Frank felt his shoulders starting to shake, his hands coming up to his face as he sobbed. He really didn't want to come across as weak in front of Gerard, who was so strong, but he couldn't help it. He couldn't stop the tears from spilling down his cheeks silently when Gerard came to a stop in front of him, taking hold of his shoulders to examine him.

"Did Ryan do something?" Gerard asked but Frank shook his head, trying to wipe his eyes, trying not to cry in front of his boss. It was too late, and another sob left him before the waterworks really started, coming out of Frank faster than he could hold it together, "What did he do? Tell me."

"It w-wasn't R-Ryan," Frank told Gerard, looking at him for a second before he looked back down, looking at the black silk tie that Gerard was wearing because it was easier to focus on instead of focusing on the eyes that were trained on him, "I-"

Frank completely lost it as he opened his mouth to explain, his whole body shaking while he cried. Frank couldn't even hold it together for long enough to tell Gerard what had happened. The idea of actually vocalizing what had happened ripped Frank apart' if he said it then it meant that what had happened was real. Jamia was really gone and there was nothing he could do about it.

Frank felt arms wrap around him, pulling him and holding him close. He continued to cry, sobbing against material that he soon realized was Gerard's shirt. He was hugging him, holding him so close, like he was letting him just cry it out. He had no idea what had happened, but clearly it was something that had shaken Frank irrevocably. He may have been broken and felt like his life was falling apart around him right now, but at the moment where Gerard was holding him and stroking his back whilst letting him cry against his chest, Frank felt somewhat comforted. He was still crying, still letting heartbroken sobs muffle against Gerard's shirt, but he didn't feel so alone.

"Do you want to talk about what happened, boy?" Gerard asked when Frank seemed a little calmer, hoping to find out why he was in such a bad state. Frank sniffed, trying to breathe through his nose, even though it was stuffed up from all the crying. Frank felt like he was calm enough to talk, maybe not calm enough to say what had happened without another influx of emotions taking over him. He wiped his nose on the back of his hand before seeing the wet blotch where his face had soaked into the white cotton of his boss's button-up.

"You shirt- Shit, I'm so sorry," Frank apologized as he reached up to wipe it dry with his hand, scrubbing at Gerard's chest with the heel of his hand almost incessantly, "I'm so, so sorry about your shirt, sir. I didn't mean to-"

"Relax," Gerard shushed him immediately, "It's fine. Need to get it all dry cleaned anyway."

Frank nodded, still feeling guilty to a degree, but he had worse on his mind to worry about other than a white shirt with a mix of body fluids on it. Frank knew he could only remain calm for so long until he would need to breathe in. He was trying so hard not to crumble, but it wasn't easy when Frank felt like his whole life was slipping between his fingers like sand.

"Hey," Gerard spoke softly to Frank, his voice in a dulcet whisper as he put his hands on Frank's shoulders to keep him steady, bending a little, "Is everything okay? Just tell me that. You don't have to go into great detail if you don't want to, my boy."

"She died," Frank blurted out, his voice croaking and cracking when an onslaught of emotions hit him hard. Along with the few drinks he had before he left the bar to come and find Gerard, the problem with talking a little easier was that he had admitted it. He told Gerard what had happened and the rest started coming out far too fluidly. The words leaving his mouth as rapidly as the tears began to fall again, "She went into labor... And afterward, she just... She's gone. My best friend is gone and I can't... I can't..."

"I'm so sorry," Gerard apologized, letting Frank collapse against his chest again. With one hand balled into a fist, Frank clung onto the lapel of Gerard suit, a fresh batch of tears already streaming while the most broken, gut-wrenching sobs tore at his throat. Frank felt Gerard holding him tightly yet again, comforting him. It helped, but it wasn't ebbing the pain every time another piece of chest caved in, the dark maw growing steadily to an inordinate size like a black hole that sucked every ounce of happiness

"I- She left me, I-" Frank spoke against Gerard's chest, not seeing the way he showed a flash of emotion across his face before he looked back down at Frank, "You don't know how I feel right now. You don't know what this is like for me."

"I'm sorry, boy.," Gerard sighed, pulling Frank away from his chest, looking at his bloodshot eyes and puffy cheeks. Frank knew that he probably stank like all sorts of unknown viscera from hospital smell to alcohol and gross bar stench. Gerard pushed some of Frank's hair from his face, "I don't know what you are going through, but I will look after you. Do you want to talk about it?"

Frank shook his head, "I wish it h-hadn't happened and, I- I just... I can't-"

"Alright, that's quite okay, Frank," Gerard sighed, looking at Frank's face for a second, "How did you get here?"

"I drove here."

Gerard sighed as he held Frank's face in his hands, "And how much have you had to drink?"

"Why're you...you asking me all these questions?" Frank frowned, wondering why Gerard was looking at him like he was trying to figure him out, "Wh-What have I done?"

"No reason, depending on how much you drank before you got behind the wheel of your car," Gerard said, looking far too authoritative for Frank's liking.

"A couple of drinks, that's all. A jack and ginger in the bar and I may have had a drink in a parking lot before I came here."

Gerard sighed harshly, shaking his head, "So, you were over the limit?"

"Maybe," Frank shrugged, "I don't know."

"You were," Gerard snapped, "You can't be so impetuous like this, Frank. You could have been in an accident, pulled over by the cops-"

"Look, I got here in one piece, okay?" Frank held his hands up, feeling like he was a kid getting told off by a parent, "I don't know what the big deal is. I'm not even drunk-"

"It is a big deal because you were over the limit! You were breaking the law!" Gerard retorted sternly, making Frank flinch back a bit. His voice was raised and Frank had never heard him speak like this before. It wasn't even speaking anymore, it was nearly shouting at him. It had Frank's knees buckle and his stomach drop as Gerard put his hands on his hips, "In New Jersey, a person is guilty of drunk-driving if he, or she, operates a motor vehicle with a Blood Alcohol Concentration of zero-point-zero-eight percent or higher. You Frank, you were drunk-driving."

"But I wasn't properly drunk," Frank argued, knowing that he wasn't the 'swaying' kind of drunk where he couldn't even form a sentence without slurring. He couldn't deny that he was a little buzzed, but there was no way he was actually properly pissed. He scowled up at Gerard, "I don't know why you're making such a big deal out of this-"

"Because I'm one of the people on the council who passed the law, Frank," Gerard jabbed a finger at his own chest, making Frank realize with a small pang of guilt, "I was one of many who approved the drink-driving limit for this state, and you just had to ignore it! You could have caused an accident. Frank, you could have been killed because of your vacuous actions."

"Well, I'm still here, aren't I?" Frank held his arms out, showing Gerard that he was in fact here and not just another drunk-driving statistic. His friend had died and this was how Gerard was going to be? Picking apart the one thing that really didn't matter right now for him.

"I wish I could say the same for one of my friends," Gerard just told him while they still stood in the dark. It took a second for Frank to realize why Gerard was making such a big deal out of this and probably why he had the drunk-driving law changed in the first place. He stood quietly in the hallway because couldn't fight back at now, letting Gerard continue, "He had the same mindset to you in this kind of situation. Carefree. Liked to have a drink or two and still drive even though he knew he was over the limit. He believed he was invincible. He didn't think that he would end up getting pulled over or hurt because of him."

"Did he...?" Frank trailed off, not wanting to finish the question. It was an easy assumption considering Gerard spoken about his friend in the past tense, and because of his sudden animosity towards Frank's recent stint.

"He died in a car accident because he was over the limit. He injured two other people in the process and died on impact. I was devastated because he was a good friend of mine when we were in college together. Not only was it his life but the life of a young woman and her child who had been walking on the sidewalk on their way to get dinner that night. Frank, they were on the sidewalk. Do you understand the gravity of your actions at all, boy?"

"I'm sorry," Frank apologized timidly, lowering his head, "I-I didn't know."

"You didn't know because you didn't ask. Being so incautious, I'm so disappointed. You may think that it won't happen to you because you think you're not that drunk," Gerard continued while Frank stared intently at his boots, feeling irrepressible amounts of guilt on his shoulders., "But it does happen. It happened to Steve and it could happen to you... Lindsey was devastated when she found out."

"Was he a friend of hers, too?" Frank asked curiously, frowning at the mention of his boss's wife. He didn't even know why he felt the need to ask, but it came out before he could stop it.

"Steve was her brother," Gerard stated simple, making Frank realize just how personal this was for him; his brother-in-law had died drink driving. Of course, Gerard was going to be furious at him for what he had done to get here. Frank shrunk back in himself a little as Gerard kept his eyes trained on him, watching him for a second. He sighed, shaking his head again before running his hands through his hair.

"I'm sorry, sir," Frank muttered, feeling pretty stupid now over what he had done. He toed at the carpet, putting his hands behind his back,"I-I didn't think."

"Clearly, you didn't," Gerard muttered, watching Frank before he pushed a hand into his pants pocket, pulling out a set of keys, "Well, it looks like I'm going to be taking someone home tonight then, doesn't it, boy?"

Frank looked up in surprise, "You don't have to drive me home. Honestly, sir, I can call a taxi."

"It isn't a bother," Gerard waved a hand at him, his anger over the situation seeming to dissipate. Frank was sure that he was still annoyed at him, but he didn't want to ask just in case it brought it all back and Gerard just started all over again, reminding him of how stupid he had been, "Someone has to look after you, my boy."

"Uh..." Frank watched in the darkness as Gerard walked passed him, clutching onto a set of keys before he stopped, looking back at Frank like he was expecting something from him.

"Well, are you coming, pup?" Gerard asked, assuming that Frank should have known to follow, "I can't have you staying here overnight. Lindsey will have a fit if someone gets into the crackers or vomits on the desks."

Frank nodded, sniffing as he walked behind Gerard the two of them leaving the office. Frank stood outside in the cold for a second, hands stuffed inside his pockets in a pathetic attempt to keep warm. God knows why he hadn't brought a jacket, but then again, he had no idea that he was going to be coming to the office at eleven o'clock at night. He had no idea this morning when he woke up that he was going to witness his best friend bring a new person into the world before she left it. Frank shuddered in the cold both inside his body and at the exterior chill in the air, waiting for Gerard while he activated an alarm inside. Moments later, he appeared with his leather briefcase in hand. He checked the door after locking it and pocketed the keys. He walked passed Frank, waving a hand at him to follow as he pressed a button on his set of keys. A car's lights flashed in the small car park to the side of the office and Frank just followed complacently behind his boss. He was completely zoned out, coming to a stop by a new black Beetle. Hands still in his pockets while he shook from the cold, he watched Gerard set his bags down on the back seat of the car, shutting the door before he got into the car.

"I thought you had a driver?" Frank questioned when he got into the car, watching curiously as Gerard fastened his seatbelt before pushing the keys into the ignition. Gerard had been driven around on the day that he had bought Frank the suits. He had honestly expected Gerard to be waving down his driver again tonight, but apparently not.

"I do from time to time. When I need him," Gerard answered, starting the car, "But I knew I was going to be staying later tonight to cover for the work you missed. Lindsey left me her car. She had the pleasure of being driven home tonight." Gerard glanced at Frank as he reversed from the parking space, "Seatbelt on, boy."

Mumbling out an apology, he strapped himself in, trying not to stare at Gerard. As much as Frank knew that he was sad and completely numb from the loss of his friend, there was still a part of him that was thrumming over his boss. He looked at his beat-up white ride and frowned as they passed it, "What's going to happen to my car?"

"You can pick it up tomorrow. There was no way I was going to let you drive home in your state."

Frank wanted to protest, saying that the only state he was in was a very sad and numb one. He held his tongue, remembering the lecture he had received from his boss. Don't start him up again, Frank thought, he made a point and you don't want to make him pissed again.

Frank just nodded, hating the idea of having to get dropped off at work on a Saturday just so he could drive back home. Not that he knew what 'home' was right now. The idea of going back to Jamia's place just seemed like far too much for him. Even thinking about it made Frank sniff, fighting back tears that were threatening to fall yet again.

"Are you okay?" Gerard asked, glancing over at Frank briefly, seeing him wipe his nose and his eyes quickly.

"No," Frank said dryly, a smile being forced onto his lips as a coping mechanism, "I feel like shit."

"Understandable," Gerard nodded in the darkness, focusing on the road while Frank leaned his head against the window, trying to remain all in one piece. His bottom lip wobbled a little in the dark, but somehow, he held it together, not wanting to break down again. Gerard cleared his throat as they turned onto Grand Avenue and passed the Ephatha Mental Health Clinic on the left. Frank looked over at his boss, who pursed his lips, "Frank...can I ask you a question?"

He shrugged, "Sure,"

"Did the baby...?" Gerard stopped himself, trying to pick his words carefully. Frank scowled out of the window at the passing blurs of buildings that were illuminated by the streetlights. They came to a stop at the intersection of Grand and Virgil and Frank stared at the Colonial Bar out of the window on the right.

"She's okay," Frank muttered, "She's at the hospital now until they can find her dad."

"Does she have a name?" Gerard queried curiously, wondering if Frank was going to divulge that information. He was fragile. Gerard didn't know if he was going to be willing to answer.

"Mia," Frank sighed, remembered the tiny person that he had held, swaddled in the blankets, the moment she had been born. The tiny little girl with the muss of brunette hair who looked just like her mother. Frank's chest ached at the memory that made him pause for a second before he continued, "Mia Nestor. I named her before I left."

"What's going to happen now?"

"Look, I appreciate you being concerned and asking me all this stuff, but I'm honestly not in the right frame of mind to be talking about this shit right now." Frank cut Gerard off as they drove under the Route 46 bridge. He felt bad enough leaving Mia alone at the hospital. He knew she was in good hands, but the idea of even considering what he could have done to help, Frank felt like he wouldn't have been able to help. The idea of adopting his best friend's daughter seemed like the right thing to do, but Frank knew that he wouldn't have been able to do it. Sometimes he could barely look after himself, let alone a small person who would have been completely dependant on him for so many years. And definitely not one that he'd have to look at every day and watch her grow into her mother. He couldn't stomach it.

"Of course," Gerard nodded, looking out of the window at the Grand Plaza shopping center that was in complete darkness, "I completely understand, dear boy."

For the rest of the drive, Frank remained silent and it was a jarring ten minutes. He didn't feel like talking, he just felt like being quiet with his head resting against the window of the passenger door, zoning out. Barely even noticing the surroundings that were passing him by as Gerard drove, he noted Leonia High School on the left when it blurred by, he noticed when they drove under the I-95 and minutes later when they drove under Route 4 because this is exactly how he went home every day. None of it registered in his tipsy skull, not even when they eventually turned off of Grand Avenue into some very swanky suburbs. He didn't know where he was right now, assuming that Gerard was just driving him back to Jamia's place in Tenafly. Gerard was just driving and Frank had no idea where, nor did he care, to be perfectly honest. He was too miserable to care at all, barely holding it together.

It was only when Gerard turned the car, slowing down as he pulled into a driveway that Frank didn't recognize. He lifted his head away from the window, realizing that Gerard hadn't taken him home at all. It was then that he realized Gerard couldn't possibly take him home if he didn't know where his supposed home was situated. He looked out of the windscreen, seeing a large house in front of him. Had Gerard really brought him back to his own house instead of taking Frank to where he had been staying with Jamia? Frank couldn't quite believe what had just epiphasized in his head. It was hard to notice the detail in the dark, but just by first glance, it was definitely a fancy place. Frank tried not to appear too awed about the house as Gerard pulled the car up under the carport to the right of the building. Frank sat in silence, not entirely knowing what to say or do while Gerard turned off the ignition.

"Home sweet home," Gerard spoke to himself, smiling somewhat in the dark, looking rather happy. It was getting closer to midnight and Frank still couldn't understand why he had been at the office for so long. "You coming, boy?"

"Where are we?"

"My home, Frank." Gerard leaned down to look at Frank who was still rooted to the seat.

"But," Frank got out of the car, following Gerard up to the double front door, mouthing a wow quietly to himself. He admired the place while Gerard searched in his bag, looking for house keys. The house was almost villa-like, the outer walls painted off-white with terracotta -ed tiles lining the roof. Ivy climbed up the walls to the right of the front door, making Frank look up, following the creeper, noticing the shutters on the windows. The whole place screamed power and money, including the garden which looked immaculate, even in the dark, "Where is your house?"

"Englewood," Gerard announced simply as he opened door to let Frank follow him inside. Of course, he lives in Englewood, Frank mused to himself with a slight snort. He watched as Gerard shut the door behind the two of them, kicking off his shoes, revealing mustard yellow socks with scarlet toes and heels. They really didn't look like anything Frank would have expected Gerard to wear, but then again, he had also never expected to be setting foot into his boss's house.

"Oh, I drive through here to get to where I live." Frank nodded, kicking off his own shoes, assuming that was a custom for them when he saw a pair of Lindsey's red-soled heels at the door. Frank watched Gerard set his briefcase down near his shoes, and he just stood there, not sure if he should follow any further. The inside of the house was astounding. It was like a realtor's wet dream, the inside of the house. Frank swore he had never seen, or even set foot, into a house that was this pristine, the kind of place that you would only see in brochures when you were looking to buy. He walked down the few small steps from the main entranceway, coming into the open planned front room with cream-painted walls and white wainscot lining the room. Frank chose to stay put, standing on the ash-wooden floor, avoiding the plush rug; it looked far too clean to be dirtied with the human touch. Same for the cream couch and armchairs that surrounded a leather ottoman. Matching cushions, in all shades of dark brown and plum, lined the long couch that could easily fit five people, . Gerard stood by the breakfast bar, shrugging his blazer off, loosening up his tie before starting to go through his mail. He stood there, hands in his pants pockets, not really knowing what to do with himself while Gerard tore open an envelope, reading what he had been sent.

"Que ils faisiez envoyiez a moi maintenant? Je pensais je reglais ceci." Gerard muttered under his breath as he stroked his chin idly.

["What have they sent me now? I thought I settled this."]

"You have a nice house." Frank piped up in a quiet voice, breaking the silence after Gerard had muttered to himself in the language he didn't understand. Gerard smiled at Frank, not noticing the blush that had crept onto his cheeks; a little too far away to see it. Frank was grateful for that while he tried to reel in the crush that was trying to make itself known right at the forefront of his brain.

"Lindsey does like to keep this place in order, sees herself as a bit of an interior designer," Gerard chuckled to himself, "Plus, there is something about a clean house, it really does wonders for the psyche."

Frank nodded at that, not really knowing what to say while he looked around, noticing the vase of roses between the armchairs. That touch definitely had 'Lindsey' written all over it, and other little things about the place screamed 'Lindsey', too. The pictures that lined the walls of the staircase to his right had an elegant oriental vibe to them that seemed so akin to how Frank knew Lindsey. The curtains by the large patio doors to his left; how warm the kitchen felt just by looking at the rows of lights that hung by the back wall. This place had a woman's touch and it was definitely the house of a happily married couple, much to Frank's dismay.

"So..." Gerard spoke, still going through his mail when he caught Frank's attention, making the latter look across the room at him, "Do you want to tell me what you did this evening before you came into the office?"

Frank swallowed at that question. Gerard already knew that he had been drinking so he couldn't have told him off for that again, could he? Gerard wanted an answer when he paused what he was doing, giving Frank a look that let him know he needed to answer quicker.

"Well, I left the hospital and drove to the nearest bar I could find," Frank began to answer, looking down at his feet while he spoke, "Then some asshole wouldn't leave me alone, so I left the bar and ended up in a liquor store. Bought some whiskey and went to some abandoned car park behind a bookshop. Stayed there for a bit, cried for a bit," Frank blushed, admitting to the fact that he had been crying made him feel somewhat emasculated, "I drank some more before I came to the office in a pathetic attempt to find someone I could talk to."

"Lucky I was still in the office," Gerard commented, looking over another letter that he had opened, "Another few minutes and I would have left. You wouldn't have been able to get into the office. Where would you have gone then?"

"I don't know,"

Frank sighed, ignoring the fact that he had considered Ryan as a last resort. That didn't matter anymore now and Gerard didn't need to know about that. Frank had found him in the office, that was all that mattered, Gerard waved a hand, "I'm sure staying here will be much more comfortable than sleeping in that beat-up old ride of yours."

Frank wanted to protest and say that his car wasn't that old, but then he would have been lying. Still riding around in the same car that his parents bought him when he passed his driving test. It was like a prized possession for him. He eyed the man who was watching him, swallowing hard, "I'm staying here?" Frank stuttered out, not sure if he had heard Gerard right, "I just thought..."

"You thought?"

"I dunno," Frank shrugged, "I just thought that you'd send me on my way once you'd made sure that I was okay."

"You're a valuable member of my staff," Gerard said pointedly, "I'm not just going to send you on your way based on my scale of you being fit enough to being alone."

"Then, why am I staying here?"

"Because it is nearly midnight, I am tired and I will admit, I would rather put you into bed upstairs than have to drive you to where you live," Gerard admitted, walking into the kitchen, "Now, can I get you anything? Some food?"

"Not hungry, sir. I'm good." Frank smiled weakly at Gerard, feeling a little more confident with his surroundings. He still refused to step onto the rug, sticking to the wooden floor, treating the carpet like it was lava in a children's game; avoid it at all costs. He walked around slowly, carefully, Frank wanted to do was just sleep and pretend that today hadn't happened at all.

"Is there anyone you need to call? Let them know where you-"

"Honestly, sir," Frank cut him off, not noticing how Gerard looked at him with utter shock for interrupting him mid-sentence, "You've done more than enough for me already. I don't know how I can repay you, but I'll be okay. You don't have to run around after me. I'm a big boy."

"You could always repay by having common decency and manners," Gerard snapped, making Frank flinch, wishing that he was still stood on the same spot where he was a few minutes before. The look on Gerard's face was enough for him to know that he had done wrong. Shame swirled in his stomach but at the same time, it felt weird. He stared at the wood-grain as he clasped his hands nervously, flinching as Gerard continued to admonish him, "You do not interrupt people when they are talking, boy. You speak when it is your turn. Do you understand?"

Frank nodded, feeling like it was better that he didn't speak right now. Whatever he said, he would probably only end up making Gerard more annoyed. His boss scowled at him, "You answer me when I ask you a question, boy."

"Yes."

"I'm sorry. Yes, what?" Gerard raised his eyebrows at Frank.

"Yes, sir." He finally answered correctly, feeling like a dog who had just been told off, tail between its legs. Frank avoided looking at Gerard, only glancing at him when he heard movement, listening until it sounded like he had stopped. Frank looked around and he saw Gerard standing near the stairs, looking back at him. Almost like he was about to click his fingers at him to hurry up. If Gerard moved and looked at him like he was running out of patience, it usually meant that he was supposed to follow.

Frank followed Gerard up the stairs, going down the hallway and passed two bookcases filled with books, ornaments and things that Lindsey thought were aesthetically pleasing for the house. Turning right, they walked past a door on their right before Gerard came to a stop by another one on their left. This was clearly where Frank was going to be sleeping that night and it was obvious when Gerard opened the door for him, signaling for him to enter.

Frank fought back another 'wow' when he entered the room, reverence and wonderment took over as he looked around. This wasn't like the small room that Frank had gotten used to sleeping in at Jamia's place with the single bed shoved in the corner. No. The room spread out at least three times bigger than his previous space. The walls were painted cream again. A full-size wardrobe spread out over one side of the room, silver-grey doors hiding what was stored behind them. An already-made double bed sat opposite the wardrobe, bedding white and pristine with a throw on the end of the bed that matched the color of the wardrobe doors. The bedside lights that were sitting on end-drawers at either side of the bed, they were switched on, lighting up the place in a warm glow. Plus a miniature chandelier hung from the ceiling, making the whole room look like it was worth more than Frank's belongings tenfold.

"You can sleep in here tonight," Gerard told him, walking over to what he thought were more cupboards against a wall. Frank couldn't hide his amazement when Gerard opened up a door, revealing an en-suite bathroom, "You should have everything you need in here. I'll only be down the hall from you anyway."

"How many bedrooms does this place have?" Frank asked curiously, sitting on the edge of the bed for a moment, bouncing a little like a kid.

"Four."

"And all the rooms look like this?" Frank queried, going to lie back on the bed, sprawling out because it was by far the most comfortable bed on which he had ever lay.

"Lindsey likes to have all the rooms made just in case we have any unexpected visitors," Gerard answered, looking pointedly at Frank.

"And where is Lindsey?"

"You do ask a lot of questions, don't you?" Gerard commented, "Probably in bed, asleep. I told her not to wait up for me- Now, I'm assuming that all you have is what you're wearing?"

"I am how you see me," Frank smirked, a form of coping mechanism kicking in; the braggadocio masking his pain. He was also still quite tipsy, which explained why he was so chatty. Not just because he was looking for a distraction to take his mind off the fact that he had lost his best friend, but because his brain was still a little fuzzy from the alcohol. He giggled, "Nothing more, nothing less."

"I think I have some spare pajamas that you can borrow." Gerard vanished a moment later, disappearing out of the spare bedroom, and at that moment was when Frank's façade slipped. In the few minutes that Gerard was gone, the realization hit that he was really alone. Jamia was gone and it was unfair, Ryan was gone but that was fair. Frank knew that he would have gone mad if he'd have stayed together with him for any longer.

He sat up on the bed, trying to hold it together despite the illusion and glamour over his head that had now begun to fade again. He had no idea how he had been able to hold it together for so long. Maybe it was Gerard, maybe it was his demeanor that had helped Frank hold it together. He was strong so Frank could be strong and without him in the same room, the walls crumbled around Frank, leaving him more broken than he was a month ago. He was trying so hard to hold it together, knowing he had lost that fight when he fought the sting in his eyes, squeezing them shut only to let the tears fall once again.