"I'm sorry."

Shut up.

"I didn't want to be the one to tell you."

Shut. Up. You're lying to me.

"She's de-"

I panic as the word starts to pass his lips. "Don't you dare say it."

He sighs softly. I know that, as her brother, he's having a hard time with this. But me? I can hardly believe that it's happening. 

"Do you want a hug?"

His voice is small, weak. He's trying to provide comfort, the only thing that he knows could possibly help me. But it's not him that I want to hug. It's her.

However, I still accept his open arms. And as my arms slowly slide around his waist, the tears start to flow. 

I stand there for what feels like hours, squeezing the life out of my darling's brother. But he never cries. Simply allows me to sob into his shirt as memories of her run through my mind. He doesn't even flinch when I start punching him, letting out the anger I feel toward any higher power who might exist. Any higher power that could've kept her here.

The realization hits me like a brick wall. I'll never see her again. Never look into those beautiful blue eyes or hear the laugh that causes butterflies in my stomach.

Never.

She's gone, forever.

And with that word circling through my brain, I cease crying. I pull away from the hug, and nod as I'm asked if everything is okay. Wiping the tears from my cheeks, I start out the door.

I promised her forever, and damn it if I don't keep that promise.

There's a small pile of sleeping pills in my hand. It was always the way I wanted to go. But now, while I'm sitting on the cold tile floor of the bathroom, that isn't what's on my mind. It's her, and only her.

Sighing, I use a shaky hand to write my last wish down on paper -- "Bury me next to my lover."

That's it. I'm ready. I swallow the pills one after the other, lying on the floor once my hand is empty.

And as everything fades away, I can hear my darling's voice in my head.

"Everything is going to be okay, Kitten."