AN: if you have seen season 1 of Legends of Tomorrow (which is one possible reason u r here), pretend that Leonard has that little talk with his younger self before they try to get the dagger from Savage in the 70s.

Depression is a bitch. And it's even more so when certain members of your so called team decide to go after you for something that isn't even your fault. I would know. I was always getting called out by Rip for something going wrong even if it wasn't really my fault. I was trusted by few on the team to begin with and I trusted even fewer. Sara, Jax, Ray, Mick, and of course Leonard all trusted me and I only trusted my original team of Mick and Leonard plus Sara. And they were the only ones who knew what went on in my head.

Mick and Leonard had always known. It was one of the reasons I had agreed to join them. I knew they, or at least Leonard, would take care of me. Mick knew about it and avoided the things he knew would throw me off. Leonard wasn't into the whole "feelings" thing but did what he could to help me out. Once we joined the Legends and I finally trusted Sara, I found someone I could kind of talk to about it. But she would never beat Leonard's way of dealing with it: ranting about what was making me feel down and then eating ice cream while doing something else. Sometimes it was watching tv. Sometimes it was doing something stupid.

Today was no different than any other time something went wrong. Ray had left a piece of his tech in the 70s so Sara, Jax, and Stein went to take care of it while Ray, Leonard, Mick, and I went to get the dagger that could kill Savage. The tech team had no real problems getting back the tech but we ran into some problems. Ray hit Leonard, why I'm still not sure, and ended up with the three of us in a cage and Mick being threatened by Savage. The team was called in and Carter died. And somehow, Rip saw it as my fault we were put into that situation.

"If Ray hadn't hit Leonard......" I yelled back at Rip.

"And if Mr. Snart hadn't brought you along maybe Dr. Palmer wouldn't have hit him!" Rip yelled.

"I was taking care of the alarm system! I wasn't even a part of whatever argument they were having this time!" I yelled. Rip continued on yelling at me but I started to tune him out and focus on keeping calm and not letting him get to me. It was hard but I was able to keep it in until he was done. "Is that all captain?" I asked mockingly and quickly left to my bunk. Technically we weren't supposed to share but Gideon had kept it a secret to keep me out of more trouble with Rip. Leonard and I were next to each other so we had the "wall" between our rooms taken down. Sara was on the other side of me so she just came over whenever she wanted.

I walked past Leonard and Sara who were talking in the corridor. I didn't stop even when Sara called my name. I knew Leonard would be watching me to see if I was feeling low or if I needed him or Sara.

 I just kept walking and went into my room without looking back. I didn't need to to know he had seen what he needed to and was following me.

"Is she ok?" Sara called after Leonard. He didn't answer and just kept walking to our rooms.

"(Y/N)? You ok?" Leonard asked as he knocked on the door. I didn't answer, knowing he would stay there until I did. Gideon had locked the door for me so I knew he wasn't coming in until I asked her to let him in. I sat down on the bed and tried to keep myself together.

*time skip an hour*

I sighed as I pushed myself off the bed. It was time to let Leonard in.

"Gideon, please unlock the door." I said quietly. The door unlocked and I opened it to find Leonard sitting on the floor waiting for me. 

He looked up at me as the door opened. "Come on then." I muttered as I turned around and went back to my bed. I could hear Leonard getting up and following me.

"Gideon, lock the door." he said once he was perched on the edge of my desk. "Alright (Y/N), talk." I shook my head. "You know the drill. Come on. There's ice cream at the end of it." I shook my head again. "I'll tell you something that's been running through my head if you tell me what's running through yours." I had been staring at the blanket on my bed but looked up at this. Leonard never let anyone "in". Lisa maybe but she was family. Mick knew more than me but they had known each other a hell of a lot longer than they knew me. I couldn't understand why he would let me in like that. So I started talking.

"Rip thinks everything bad that happens is my fault! I had nothing to do with Ray hitting you! I wasn't even a part of the conversation! I don't even know what that conversation was about! I was trying to get the alarm system down when that cage came down on us! And I had no idea that Savage was the one who owned the dagger." I said as I got off the bed and started pacing in front of Leonard. He watched the floor as I moved back and forth, moving my arms around like crazy and trying not to break down like I had so many times before. "It just feels like I have no place on this team or in this life or any life and I just want it all to stop! Hardly anyone trusts me and aside from the original duo," Leonard smirked at this and I felt a little better just seeing that. "I only trust Sara. I wasn't cut out for this. Maybe it would better if I just left." Leonard looked up at me when I said that.

"Left the team or.....?" Leonard trailed off. He watched me as I took a deep breath and walked over to the desk to lean next to him. I closed my eyes and let my head fall against his shoulder.

"Isn't it always or when I'm like this Len?" I quietly answered. Leonard nodded. He gently took my hand and led me through the "wall" and to his bed. I sat down as he went to the little fridge and got the ice cream I knew he kept just for me. He joined me by the bed and we started to eat. It was quiet for a while.

"Let me tell you something (Y/N). It's the same thing I told my younger self earlier." He said as he looked up at me. I nodded and took another spoon full of ice cream. "Don't ever let anyone hurt you. Ever. Not here." Leonard reached up and gently tapped my temple which caused me to give him a small smile. "And especially not here." Leonard moved his finger down to above my heart. I watched him carefully. There was something up with him but I couldn't figure out what it was. Leonard pulled his hand away and shoved both hands in his pockets. "No matter what you've always have to look out for yourself." I nodded and Leonard seemed content with the answer because he went back to eating the ice cream.

We ate in silence for a while. Only the sound of trying to get our spoons into the hard ice cream filled the room. After about half of the tub was gone, Leonard put it back into the fridge and joined me by the bed again. He played with my fingers at the edge of the bed for a while. I wasn't sure why, but it was another thing that calmed me down after all of the things that happened.

"Leonard?" I asked. I got a soft grunt in reply. "You said you would tell me something if I told you what was wrong." Leonard nodded and stopped playing with my fingers. He looked up at me. "What was it?" Leonard gave me a little nod as he pulled himself up onto the bed.

"Maybe it's being on this ship travelling through time..." Leonard moved to lean against the wall. "I started to wonder what the future might hold for me." I watched Leonard move around a little more, almost like he couldn't get comfortable. This was strange. He was always comfortable with whatever the situation was. Something was wrong. "And you." Leonard moved closer to me. He looked at me and gently put his hand over mine. "And me and you." I froze for a second.

"What do you mean Leonard?" I asked, a little confused about what he was saying.

"I guess I'm trying to say that somewhere along the time we've known each other and I've helped you out, I fell for you." Leonard said with a shrug. Not so much as a blush or a nerve showed on his face. He was Captain Cold thru and thru.

"Fell for me?" I asked. Leonard nodded and smirked at me.

"Yes (Y/N). Fell for you. As in falling in love." Leonard said with a chuckle. I looked at him with slightly wide eyes. "It's funny what spending time with someone who needs to rant to get out of their depression can teach you about them." Leonard's smirk turned into a small smile. "And I've learned quite a bit about you (Y/N)." I smiled up at him.

"Have you?" I asked teasingly. Leonard nodded as he moved even closer to me. "I don't believe you." I teased again.

"I guess I'll just have to show you." Leonard said as he leaned down and pressed his lips to mine.