Cover my eyes

Cover my ears

Tell me these words are a lie

It can't be true

That I'm losing you

The sun cannot fall from the sky

-*+*-

I never got to say goodbye. 

The fact of knowing this haunted me, but what haunted me more was the cold, soul crushing fact that she was gone. That Allison was dead. That she'd never be coming back.

And I didn't get to say goodbye.

The brightly streaked yellow and pink flowers in my hand smelled just like her. I was almost positive that these were her favorite flowers, along with the fact that they smelled exactly how her hair did when I caught a scent of it in the wind. They really were pretty and I knew that Allison would have appreciated them a lot, if only she was here to see them.

Warm tears clouded my vision as I looked down at her gravestone, trying not to take in the words that were written on it in bold print. The graveyard was completely empty; allowing me to hear all of the birds and other animals running about. I half wished there was some other noise to distract me from thinking about her too much, for every time I did, I always lost it.

My mouth goes dry as I lick my lips slowly, trying to find the words to say. I needed to say something. I haven't been able to sleep for the past couple of days, of course because of her losing her, but there was something on my chest that I couldn't shake. I knew it was because I haven't said goodbye, not because I didn't want to, but because I knew that would mean she was really gone, and I didn't want to accept that fact.

But I needed to do this.

My bottom lip trembles as my eyes stare at her name carved in the cold stone, thinking back to all of the moments we had before she was gone...just like that. Her smile ran through my mind, making me cheer up slightly for a moment, but then it was gone. I knew she wouldn't want me crying, but I couldn't help myself. She meant everything to me.

I take a long, deep breath as my voice trembles. "Allison, I-I don't know if you can hear me or not. I needed to say goodbye, even though I don't...I can't accept it. One minute you were here in my arms and the next you're gone. You know...you were the best thing that happened to me, Allison. You of course know about my childhood, but after I met you, you gave my life meaning again. You made me smile, you made me laugh, and most importantly, you understood me. I could talk to you about anything and everything at any time and you'd listen. But I guess all of that was just my seven seconds of bliss."

I find myself kneeling then, tracing my pale fingers over the carved letters that made her death seem far more real. "Why did you have to be so damn stubborn, Allison? If you weren't then you'd be here right now and I wouldn't be sitting here right now talking to your gravestone. But besides your stubbornness, you found a way to defeat the Oni, which is what saved your friends. They're all okay now because of you...because of your stubbornness."

I gently place the bright flowers on the ground in front of the stone, the bright colors shinning in a dull place like this. "I miss you Allison. I can't stress that enough. I'm here to say goodbye, and I'm not sure I even can. It's like every time I make it to the surface for a breath of air, waves of memories are crashing back onto me and sending me miles below the surface again. I can't forget you Allison, I won't. You mean too much to me to be forgotten. So I guess here I am, letting you know that everything is okay and that I miss you like hell. I'm...I'm here to move on. So I guess this is goodbye."

Sobs wrack my body just then as my head falls onto the top of the gravestone, letting the tears come. I feel the flowers crinkle a little from my hard grip on them, but I couldn't help it. It was like I was filled with an empty sadness that would never be filled unless someone payed for her death, which was already avenged. Something didn't feel right about it all, but this sadness was an endless void that I was afraid would never go away.

"Isaac?"

I look up at the sound of the voice, knowing it was Chris the moment I heard him. I was surprised I didn't hear him approach my sooner, but I guess I wasn't really caring that much about my surrounding at the moment. His hand rests on my shoulder as I slowly stand, leaving the flowers on the ground.

"I miss her," I say just before another wave of tears hit me, causing Argent to pull me into an embrace. 

I can tell he was crying too. "I miss her too."

-*+*-

How sad...I always hate writing such sad things that crush my heart and soul at the same time.

Dedicated to @samclaflins for requesting such a cruel thing. I hope you did enjoy however; I suck at writing stuff like this. 

But the lyrics at the beginning are from Tears of an Angel and I thought they suited the chapter well, so I added them in there at the top. I highly recommend to listen to the song while reading this; it will make you cry guaranteed.

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