TAYO
—🍂Solwp

“Shine, I love you. Walang iwanan.” nakangiti niyang sabi habang yakap-yakap ako mula sa likod.

“Oo, promise walang iwanan. Mahal na mahal din kita.” I said with some smile on my face.
Hmh~ sana ganito lang lagi... yung masaya lang kami. I love Sean so much and we've been together for five years now. Madami na din kaming pinagdaanan, no perfect relationship ika nga diba pero kahit anong problema pa yan malalampasan namin yan as long as we have each other.

-

“Shine! Makinig ka nga.” nilampasan ko lang siya saka nagdadabog na iniwan. Naiinis ako sa kanya dahil nahuli kung may date na babae sa mamahaling restaurant.

“Ano ba Shine!?  Hear me first!” sumisigaw na ani niya.
At talagang sinigawan ako. Nanggigil na hinarap ko si Sean.

“SINISIGAWAN MO 'KO!? IKAW NA NGA ANG MAY KASALANAN, IKAW PA ANG MAY GANANG MANIGAW! THE NERVE!”

“Look- I-I didn't mean to shout at you. Please, love, makinig ka kasi muna.” mahinahon nitong sabi sabay hila sa'kin para sa isang yakap.
I sigh. Alam na alam niya talaga kung paano ako paamuhin.

“Business partner ko kasi yun, kaya kami magkasama. Diba pinaalam ko na to sa'yo nong isang araw pa.” he explain calmly, kaya napasimangot na lang ako.

“Di mo naman sinabi na babae.” He softly chuckled kaya sinapok ko. He pulled away from the hug tapos humalik sa noo ko.

“Nagtatampo ka pa?” malumanay na tanong niya sakin sabay ayos sa nagulo kong buhok.
Umiling-iling na lang ako.

“Tara! Date na lang tayo para di ka magselos.”

“Hindi ako nagseselos, galit lang ako. Kapal nito.”

“Eh kaya ka nga galit kanina kasi nagselos ka. Aminin mo na kasi, love.” naiinis na sinapok ko siya. Napaka mapang-asar niya pero mahal ko siya sobra.

-

“Argh~ let's end this Sean.” sabi ko sa kanya na may halong inis. All this time kaya laging busy kasi may ibang babae. Goshh!

“What are you talking about, Shine?” he said na maslalo ko lang kinainis. Shine? As in Shine talaga? Nasaan na yung love?

“Wag mo akong ma what-what ngayon hah! Kaya ka pala busy kasi may iba kana?” mukhang nagulat ito sa sinabi ko. Sheymss talaga. May pa gulat-gulat reaction pa siya, kala seguro niya hindi ko malalaman.

“Nagulat ka!? Kasi tama ako?” I smirk

“Break na tayo!” I yelled. But he just laugh. Tiningnan ko siya ng matalim.

“Look love, kumain muna tayo, gutom lang yan.” sabi niya sabay hawak sa kamay ko. Malakas na tinabig ko siya.

“Wag na nga tayong maglokohan. You said na hindi mo ko masusundo kasi may urgent meeting kayo, pero nakita kitang may katagpong babae sa mall. Ano yun? Sa mall ang meeting niyo?”
Tiningnan niya ko saka bumuntong hininga.

“Hmh~ mamaya pa sana toh pero dahil galit ka i a-advance ko na lang.” he took a deep breath. “Shine, you know how much I love you. Na kahit ilang babae pa ang darating ikaw at ikaw parin ang mamahalin ko. We've been through a lot of things and we fight a lot of times pero kahit ganon hindi nagbago yung nararamdaman ko para sa'yo. Mas tumindi pa nga. I really can't imagine my life without you. I love you Shine, will you marry me?” nilabas niya ang isang red velvet box na may lamang diamond ring.

I gasp! Is he proposing?
Ay tanga! Hindi ba obvious - sheymss nababaliw na'ko, kinakausap ko na yung sarili ko.
Tumango ako sa kanya habang may mga luhang namumuo sa mata ko. Finally, ito na yun. Napahawak ako sa ulo ko ng bigla itong sumakit. Sobrang sakit na halos mapasigaw ako.

“Shine, love. Are you okay?” he held me near him.
Ngumiti lang ako saka niyakap siya. Bakit ngayon pa.

“You need anything?” bakas sa boses nito ang pag-aalala. I hug him tightly.

“W-wala,  okay lang ako. Medyo nahilo lang. Sean, love, I love you and thank you for making me happy everyday.” sabi ko sakanya.

“No, thank you for loving me and for agreeing to my marriage proposal. Kala ko talaga iiwan mo nako. I love you, love, today, tomorrow and forever.”

“Kaya ka ba busy kasi inaayos mo ito?” nahihiyang sabi ko.

“Yeah! Yung babae na nakita mo kanina, siya yung organizer. Sorry kasi pumalpak. Mamayang gabi pa kasi sana eh.” sabi niya sabay kamot sa batok.
Na guilty na man ako. How can I doubt his love for me?

“No, I'm sorry kung nasira ko yung plano but hindi mo na man na kaylangang gawin ang mga 'to. You is enough Sean and asking me for a lifetime commitment, sobra-sobra na.” I said pero hinalikan niya lang ako sa noo.

“That's how much I love you, kaya wag ka nang magduda.”

-

“Doc, ano po bang nangyayari?”
“Ms. Shine the excessive headache you feel is because of---”
Naglakad ako pauwi na lutang. Paano ko to sasabihin kay Sean?

* After 3 years *

“Congratulations newly wed!” people are cheering and chanting.
Mula sa bintana ng kotse tanaw ko si Sean habang naka suot ng tuxedo. He look so handsome as always. Today is his wedding.
I smile bitterly. I was supposed to be on that place, I am supposed to be that girl pero hindi. I signal my driver to leave the place. I contain my tears from falling. My Sean is no longer my Sean.

Pagkarating ko sa bahay, may mga sumalubog na naka puting damit, inalalayan nila ako papasok. I sign them to leave me first.
Naglakad ako patungo sa garden. Umupo ako sa pang-isahang upuan saka nanghinang sumandal.

Memories of me and Sean filled my mind. The day we meet, how we fall in love with each other, how he understand me despite of my mood swings, how he care for me and the way he loves me. Parang kahapon lang ang saya pa namin. I smile as tears kept on falling on my eyes.
Bakit sa'kin pa?
Napahinto ako sa pag-iisip ng may sasakyang huminto sa harap ng bahay. Even from distant, I can clearly saw him— Sean, he was running towards my direction, he was holding my favorite flower.

“Shine” I smiled as I hear him call my name. Namuo uli ang mga luha sa mata ko... nandito siya, ang taong unang minahal ko at mamahalin ko hanggang huli.

“Hmh” I whispered as I reach for his hand. This could be the last time.

“Why are you here outside, love? Maiinitan ka.” Upon hearing his words, my tears fall down. I cry hard in front of him.Ang sakit, ang sakit-sakit.

“Ssh~ stop crying you're making me worry.” he softly said.

“Hindi ka dapat nandito.” sabi ko sa kanya pero nag-iwas lang ito ng tingin.

“Sean, I'm sorry. Sorry sa lahat-lahat ng pagkukulang ko. Please, alagaan mo siya at mahalin mo higit pa sa pagmamahal mo sakin.”

“Shine, alam mo na man diba na ikaw lang-” I cut him off. Kung pwede lang sana Sean, kung pwede lang.

“Pagod na ako Sean. Forget about your love for me. Sakanya mo na lang ibuhos yang pagmamahal mo. I want you to be happy, happy even without me.” nanghihinang sabi ko.

“NO! How can I forgot my love for you when-” I cut him off again.

“Mamatay na ako Sean. Hindi pwedeng habang buhay kang matatali sa'kin.”

“Love naman, wag mong sabihin yan. I already agree on marrying someone else pero ang ibigay yung buong pusong pagmamahal sa iba, I can't.” I can see that his eyes is already red.

“Sean, tanggapin na natin. Gusto kong sa pag-alis ko okay ka, na-” he cut me off

“I won't be okay, Shine yang mga salita mo eh.” he then start crying. My heart bit faster than normal and my body tremble.
I hold his face. And look at his eyes, memorizing every detail of him.

“Sean, l-love. Nong n-nakilala kita binago mo yung buhay ko. You make me smile  even w/o  a reason. Thank you uli sa lahat sa pagmamahal at pag-aalaga. For every moments n-na nakasama kita, you m-make me the h-happiest woman a live. M-masakit sa'kin na bitawan ka but I-I can't just be selfish to hold you kung mawawala rin ako. Atleast sa pag-alis ko, you won't be alone. Thank you uli, be happy. P-pagod na ako Sean, let me r-rest now.” I said almsot out of breath. I can't feel my body anymore. Pain, too much pain.

I saw panic in his eyes, I hold him tight.

“N-no no love please n-not now. Not now please, hindi ko kaya.” I hear him calling the nurses, but I am so tired, my body is too tired to mind.
“Love please don't do this to me. Wag mo na man akong iwan, p-please I c-can't mababaliw ako.” I can hear people saying pero wala nakong naintindihan. I saw the love of my life, crying. He is in pain... because of me. I'm sorry Sean, mahal kita pero paalam.

Akala ko TAYO talaga pero pinagtagpo lang pala  tayo pero 'di itinadhana.

“L-love s-sorry. I-I l-love y-you s-so m-much.”

I held him tight as I closed my eyes.

🥀EDITED.