"Do you want to go to bed?" Steve asked as they had come home. He was a bit unsure of how to handle the situation, but she did need to sleep. "Yeah, I'll be right there." Natasha said, and Steve nodded. She walked after Steve into the bedroom, changing into something more comfortable before she got into bed. Steve's arms surrounded her body immediately and at first, she felt safe. His gentle embrace and small, loving kisses on her neck calmed her down as usual. Then, she closed her eyes only to open them a second later as the recent nightmare rushed through her mind like a thunderstorm. When Steve fell asleep beside her, she desperately escaped his embrace, careful not to wake him up. She sighed deeply, getting out of bed. All night, she tried focusing on other stuff. Watching Tv, reading, online shopping and even cleaning the apartment. Anything to keep her stinging eyes open. As morning slowly came, she slipped into the bedroom again and laid down beside Steve. She didn't want him to worry. Especially since he couldn't do anything about it. She felt dizzy, as if her mind was filled with fog. She couldn't think straight because of the lack of sleep. As her head fell onto the pillow, Natasha couldn't keep her eyes open any longer. She got a few minutes of sleep before Steve's arms surrounded her again and she woke up. "Good morning." Steve whispered, holding her close. "Did you have any nightmares tonight?" He asked her softly. "No. Not tonight." She answered, opening her tired eyes.
The next few days were in the same pattern for Natasha. The days were filled with doctors appointments, nausea and headaches. The nights were filled with distraction. She went to bed whenever Steve did, only to get out of bed as soon as he fell asleep. She kept herself distracted all night, doing whatever the baby in her stomach wanted her to do. Mostly eating and throwing up. As the morning sun slipped through the windows, Natasha slipped down next to Steve in their bed. Every morning Steve asked the same question. "Did you sleep well?" And every morning, she answered with the same lie. "Yes."

• • •

As days went by, Natasha had a hard time trying to hide her busy nights from Steve. Her eyes had gone red and the bags under her eyes were hard to hide even with layers of makeup. The fact that she sometimes fell asleep in the middle of the day seemed normal at first since she was pregnant, but as it happened way too often, Steve got suspicious. He knew that this pregnancy was different. The doctors had even pointed out that all of the side effects to a normal pregnancy would probably become worse in Natasha's case, which they had. Three times worse. Steve desperately took help from the doctors, wanting every advice on how he could help Natasha with the terrible morning sickness, backaches, sleepiness and with everything else he noticed but there was not much he could do. "You want some pancakes?" Steve asked Natasha softly as  she sat in the couch, staring at the tv. When he didn't get an answer, he looked over at her. "Natasha?" He asked again. No answer.
He frowned a little, walking over to her. "Natasha you could at least answer.." He said, looking at her. Natasha's eyes were wide open and Steve didn't realise until after a few seconds that she was asleep, with her eyes open. He frowned deeply, sitting down next to her. "Hey Nat.." He said, gently touching her arms. Natasha started to blink before turning her head to look at him. "What?" She mumbled. "Are you tired?" He asked and she immediately shook her head. "No. No I'm not." She said and it was clear that her lies became worse and worse. "Maybe you should get some sleep." He said, trying to get her out of the couch but Natasha hit away his hands. "No! Just leave me alone!" She said, rather upset. Steve raised his eyebrows. "I'm just trying to help you." He said, looking at her. "I don't need your help. I don't need anyone's help." She said, turning her eyes back to the tv. Steve sighed as he looked at her. She didn't look like her healthy self. Natasha was always beautiful and still is now, but she looked sick. As if she had been battling a sickness for years. Steve couldn't handle seeing her like this. He had to do something.

"Natasha, let's just eat something and then we'll both rest for a while. Okay?" Steve asked, giving her a small smile. Natasha turned her ice cold glare to him, just staring at him for a few seconds. "I said, leave me alone." She said with an emotionless voice Steve hadn't heard for months. He was almost shocked by hearing her sound so cold towards him. "Natasha I'm sorry, but you need my help right now." He said, a bit hurt at the way she acted towards him. Natasha chuckled before glaring at him again. "I thought you had good hearing? Just leave me alone! Let me breath!" She said, raising her voice. Steve frowned deeply, meeting her intense eyes. "Fine." He said, sighing deeply. "I'll go for a walk or something." He said without receiving an answer from Natasha. He once again let out a sigh before grabbing his jacket and walking out of the apartment. The evening soon sneaked upon the city and the sky had already turned a bit darker. Steve stared down at the ground as he walked, wrapping the jacket around him a little tighter as it was a bit chilly outside. In the middle of his upset thoughts and exhausted mind, he bumped into someone. "Sorry.." He said, looking up only to see a blonde woman in front of him with wet cheeks and red eyes.
"Sharon?" He asked surprised and she quickly wiped away the tears from her cheeks. "Wow this is highly inappropriate." She said, giving him a small smile even though she was clearly upset and sad about something. "Are you okay?" Steve asked softly and she tried smiling even brighter. "My boyfriend just broke up with me actually, so no." She said and Steve frowned a little, not really knowing what to say. "I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable. I think I better go." She said, sighing before giving Steve another smile. "Do you want to talk about it?" Steve suddenly asked, thinking that maybe she needed someone to talk to and he was right.

As Steve had left the apartment, Natasha felt awful. Her lack of sleep affected her mood too much and she knew she had been rude towards Steve for days. She just couldn't help it. She felt so mad all the time and every little small thing annoyed her. It was as if all of her emotions became stronger and she had a hard time handling it.  She knew Steve was right. She needed some sleep, something to eat and someone to care for her. That someone being Steve. But she just messed up all over again, like she always do. Natasha shook her head and bit her lip. She had to at least stop being like this. She grabbed her jacket and walked outside, deciding to find Steve. She didn't even realise that she could just call him. Her mind was too dizzy and her body too tired to even think straight. Natasha cursed a bit to herself as it started to rain but she continued walking, too determined to turn back.
Steve and Sharon sat down in a coffee shop to escape the rain that suddenly started to pour down on them. Steve had spent a while comforting Sharon as she told him about her boyfriend who, in Steve's eyes, were a total jackass. "Thank you. I really needed that." Sharon said, giving him a grateful smile. "Of course." He said, nodding. "Relationships is just.. I don't know." She said and Steve nodded. "How are you though? And Natasha?" Sharon asked and Steve sighed. "It's hard." Steve admitted. "She's having a hard time sleeping. She don't want to eat either.. She's so down and exhausted.. I don't know what to do anymore." He said, looking down at the table. "It's really bad." He added, thinking of her. It killed him seeing her so exhausted and hurt. He was so confused and didn't know what the best thing to do would be. He sighed deeply, looking up at Sharon. "You know, the only thing that's worse than feeling terrible yourself is when the person you love feel terrible." Sharon said. "It tears you apart."
Steve sighed deeply, dragging his hand over his face as an attempt to erase his sad expression. It didn't work. Sharon gave him a small smile. "I think both of you'll be alright." She said. "All three of you." She added and Steve smiled a bit. "All three of us." He mumbled, feeling his chest get a little less heavy as he thought about it. "I hope you get over that douchebag of yours." Steve said. Sharon raised her eyebrows a bit at his language but nodded. "Thank you." She said, smiling. "I better get home to Natasha though. Thank you, for everything." Steve said. "Speaking of Natasha.." Sharon said, looking out through the window. Steve turned his head as well, looking out. Out in the pouring rain stood the redhead, staring at them. She was soaking wet and her clothes pressed tightly against her body, showing off the big baby bump even more. Her mascara had run down her cheeks as if she had been crying, which maybe she had, it was hard to tell because of the rain. Her lips had gotten a more blue colour because of the cold and Steve watched her surprised. "Natasha?" Her name slipped between his lips and right as it had, she was gone from her spot. "I have to go." Steve said, looking quickly at Sharon who nodded. "You better hurry. That woman might be pregnant but if anyone knows how to disappear, it's her." Sharon said, taking a sip of her coffee as Steve ran outside after Natasha. Sharon looked out through the window, watching Steve leave. Maybe one day, she'd have what Steve and Natasha shared but Peggy's words still echoed in the back of her head. "Know your value, Sharon." She smiled a bit, before Sharon grabbed her phone, deleting her ex's phone number.

• • •

Natasha had almost given up her search for Steve. Her body went so cold by the rain that she felt numb and she was just about to turn her heels to walk straight home as she saw him. Steve sat in a coffee shop, right across from Sharon Carter. Natasha didn't know what happened in that moment as she saw them, but her mind exploded. Jealously grabbed her mind in a tight embrace as a feeling of loneliness attacked her heart. Her exhaustion met her damaged heart and she lost it. She had nothing against Sharon which made it even more difficult for Natasha to handle the situation. Sharon was kind, smart, a great agent; everything Steve deserved. Rage hit her body like thunder and she wondered how he could do this to her. She was pregnant, and he still decided to cheat on her? Of course, that wasn't the case. Natasha simply couldn't think straight. Her mind was confused. She couldn't separate her nightmares, own terrible thoughts and reality anymore. She was exhausted, but she didn't know it herself. For her, it was as real as it could be. Natasha managed to get home, knowing Steve was probably following her. She wanted to scream, to tear something apart, which was what she did. She grabbed a vase, throwing it to the ground and pieces spread across floor. She continued the act, taking a glass or a plate, anything she could get her hands on. She didn't stop until Steve grabbed the glass she was about to throw, putting it aside. "Natasha? What are you doing?" He asked confused, trying to understand why she was so upset. "What am I doing?!" She said, way too loud as she grabbed another glass. "What are you doing?!" She asked, throwing the glass to the wall. Steve looked at her, shocked to see her like this. "You're sleeping with Sharon?" Natasha burst out, putting her hand over her heart as if it stopped beating. Steve frowned deeply, feeling his chest hurt. "Natasha, what are you talking about?" He asked softly. "Don't lie to me! You are, aren't you?!" She said, about to hit his chest. Steve caught her wrists, holding onto her tightly. "I'm not." He said calmly. "I saw you! You were with her!" She screamed at him, trying to get out of his tight grip.

Steve quickly wrapped his big arms over hers as if to give her a hug from behind. He held her tightly, not letting go even though her screams made his ears hurt. Natasha was strong, but her body was exhausted and after a few minutes of struggling, she gave up. Tears started streaming down her cheeks and a feeling of helplessness hit her body. Steve held her tightly as she cried. His heart broke into a billion pieces as he heard her loud sobs. Natasha clasped tightly onto his wet shirt, unable to let go. Steve let her cry into his embrace for a while before he made them move into the bathroom. He cleaned off the makeup that still existed on her face, drying her hair a bit with a towel and helping her get out of her wet clothes. The tears didn't stop running down Natasha's cheeks but her loud sobs soon became whispers, asking him if he would leave her. Steve helped her change into some warm clothes as he whispered small reassuring words to her, letting her know that he was never planning on leaving her. Steve got changed as well, hanging up their wet clothes over the bathtub before he slowly directed Natasha to the bedroom. Natasha sat down on the bedside as Steve brought some extra blankets to the bed to keep her warm. "You can leave if you want. I can handle it." Natasha whispered, holding a hand on her baby bump. Steve hushed her, making sure she laid down comfortably in the bed. Steve laid down beside her, covering them with lots of blankets. He wrapped his arms around her cold body, keeping her close and secure. "Listen to me. I won't ever leave you, Natasha." He whispered, letting his hand grab hers beneath the covers. "I love you." He whispered. Natasha didn't move or say anything, but he suddenly felt her hand squeeze his a little and he sighed, relieved. He kissed her neck a little, terrified to let her out of his embrace.
After a few more tears down Natasha's cheeks and a few more I love you's from Steve's lips, Natasha finally fell into deep slumber.