Steve and Natasha had spent another hour in bed. Natasha half asleep and Steve wide awake, planting small kisses on her face. When she finally woke up, Steve had planned making her breakfast but she was in a hurry to work so she said she'd just grab a coffee on the way. When she was about to walk out of the door, Steve grabbed her arm and dragged her in for a kiss. Natasha was a bit surprised by the small act but fell into his embrace very willingly. She gave him a small smirk as she broke the long kiss and met his eyes.
"Have a fun day off work." She said and Steve scoffed.
"It won't be fun without you." He said and she smiled.
"You're a terrible liar, Rogers." She said as she walked out of his apartment.
"Maybe I am but that wasn't a lie!" He shouted after her. Natasha smiled at his words and glanced back a bit at him. She met his smile and kept walking.
Steve sighed a bit and closed the door. He had hoped that he could spend his day off work with Natasha but Fury needed her for some sort of mission. It wasn't something big though. That's what she told him at least. Steve went to the refrigerator and poured some orange juice in a glass, drinking it up all at once.
It hit him when he stood there, not knowing what to do, that without Natasha there, it was pretty much nothing he could do. He already felt bored and glanced at the clock on the wall. Natasha left four minutes ago. He sighed loudly.

He had finally made the decision to sit down by the Tv. He hesitated for a long while before deciding that. He thought a run would be better but he just didn't feel like it. Steve didn't watch Tv a lot. Mostly just news and stuff, he had never understood all different Tv shows and annoying cooking channels. He couldn't understand why someone would want to waste time watching other people's lives and not live your own. It all seemed pointless to him. Natasha did enjoy some Tv shows though so he thought he'd give it a shot at least. He hadn't anything else planned today anyway. He spent a few hours, just switching channels and occasionally picking up a newspaper, too bored to keep watching. But then he suddenly found a show Natasha mentioned once called "Grey's anatomy". He realised at once that it was about surgeons and doctors, that was pretty clear.
Steve watched the episode and was suddenly stuck. He didn't know why he found it so fascinating. He hadn't ever even imagined himself as a doctor or anything but this Tv show somehow got stuck in his brain. A very sad scene in the show got his thoughts flying around his head like thunder. He suddenly had a hard time thinking straight. His eyes didn't leave the Tv and he felt his heart beat faster and faster.
A man in the show was dying and had lost his girlfriend only hour before. But that was of little concern to Steve who barley even knew who the man or his girlfriend was by only watching one episode of the show. What touched Steve was the mans words.
"If you love someone, you tell them." The man said, looking at a doctor next to him. "Even if you're scared that it's not the right thing. Even if you're scared that it'll cause problems. Even if you're scared that it'll burn your life to the ground, you say it, you say it loud and you go from there." The man finished and Steve stared at the Tv.
One thing and one thing only was on his mind, Natasha.
Why hadn't he told her that he loved her? He suddenly felt like such an idiot. Natasha deserved to know that he loved everything that she was. That he loved everything about her. The way she wanted her tea, the way she smiles at Clint's jokes but deeply tries to hide it even though they have the same crappy humour, how she cares about everyone but hide it which makes people think the opposite of her, the way she held Lila with such tender and the next second she could easily hit down five guys at a time. She was extraordinary. She was.. perfect. Beyond that. Why hadn't he told her that he love her? What if he lost her and she didn't know? She needed to know. She needed to know how much he loved her. Steve turned of the Tv in a hurry, grabbed his jacket and basically ran out of his apartment.
He needed to tell her.
He needed to tell Natasha how much he loves her.

• • •

Natasha had just got off work. She smiled at the fact that Fury had let her go home a bit early. She handled that quick little mission faster than ever and was eager to surprise Steve with a bag of candy. Like they always do. She went to the closest grocery store, filled a bag with different sweets and paid for  it before leaving the store. This thing that was going on with Steve had made her in such a good mood lately. She smiled all the time. She sometimes even had to remind herself to stop looking so happy, people would start talking other wise. She just loved him so much. She really did. She couldn't hide that from herself anymore. She loved him. So much. And she loved how he made her feel. She was so.. happy? The thought itself made her stop walking. Was she happy? She surely felt happy. Steve made her happy. She grabbed the bag of candy a little harder and kept on walking eager to see him. She suddenly felt a hard hit against her left side and for a moment, she only saw the blue sky. She could hear loud screams around her and as her head hit the ground she felt her eyes getting blurry. She tried sitting up, not that surprised or shocked. She was trained not to be. But her mind couldn't control her body. She couldn't move. People gathered around Natasha who laid in the middle of the street, blood spread out in a little puddle around her. Candy drowned in the blood and was spread out over the entire street. A car stood a few meters away. With windows broken and the driver was passed out, blood dripping from his nose. Natasha heard people talk with loud and stressed voices as she laid still and stared up at the blue sky. It looked beautiful. It was a good sight. For a minute, she thought that this was it. This would be a good moment for her to die. It felt ordinary. No missions, no assassinations. She'd just be a girl who was hit by a car. She liked that. She liked staring up at that blue sky with fluffy white clouds with nothing more to worry about. Her pain was washed from her body. She didn't feel a thing. It made it all so easy. It was an easy decision. She could die now, she thought. But right before her eyes closed, she felt something. She felt her heart beating. It started to beat harder and harder.
Steve, she thought and everything went black.