August 9th 2009, 5:32pm.

Heart monitors and hospital food was what I was used to seeing every day for the past month and a half. It's Sunday and I'm at the ICU, watching my mother's friend's mother Francesca, dying of congestive heart failure.

   "Francesca, I'm sorry about all of this," I said as I was holding this poor old woman's hand as I watched her dying on the hospital bed. I wish my mom and her friend, Carol, were here right now too.

   She coughed a little and said to me, "No, no, Carmella. I lived a great life, but now it's time for me to leave. And in no way do I have any regrets! Except..."

   I gulped. "What is it?

   "M-Michael Jackson," she said suddenly.

   "What are you talking about?"

   "It all started just about when you were born twelve years ago. Five years beforehand, I got hired to work as a maid at his Neverland Ranch. And it was such a beautiful place. The gardens, the lights, the animals, the rides, the lakes, everyting! But one day..."

   "But one day?" I indicated for her to go on. I listened carefully trying to understand her through her thick French accent.

   "But one day, Carmella, it was the due date of his wife, the nurse Debbie Rowe's pregnancy. But that afternoon, I was greeted at the Neverland gates by a woman named Priscilla Presley. She was apparently looking for Michael because her daughter was chasing him. I tell you Carmella, that woman would not leave Michael alone after the divorce. I was guilty of dealing money with her for every visit her daughter, Lisa, got wit Michael. I tried to shoo her away and told her to keep off the property as I already made a deal with her multiple times before that

   "Priscilla then offered me twenty million dollars to get him to her. That's more than what I get paid a year working as Michael Jackson's maid! So I got her a deal, but Michael was frantic on the phone when I tried to persuade him about remarrying that...that...witch. So, I rushed over to the hospital, and I saw the most beautiful thing that anyone could ever see. I saw Debbie and Michael sitting on the hospital bed with little Prince Jackson in their arms, and right there and then I felt terrible."

    "So what happened?" I asked.

   "Michael turned his head toward me when he saw me coming through the door," I saw tears forming in her eyes as she continues, "and the way he looked at me...such shame, such disappointment. For the first time ever, I let him down, because he somehow found out what I was doing, and I wasn't there when I said I would be."

   "But everyone screws up sometimes. If we didn't, we'd never be able to be the people we are today."

   "No, no, no, this was different. The worst part was that I never met little Prince. Never watched him grow up, never met Michael's other two children either, Paris and Prince Michael II, never went to Michael's funeral, noting. When Michael died two months ago, I felt horrible! I never saw him again after the winter of '97, never had the chance to say sorry, and now he's gone. Look at me now, karma has happened. I will soon be gone too."

    "Don't say that," I said. "You lived a great life and you taught me so many things, as if you were my grandmother."

   It killed me inside to look at her dying and telling me the biggest mistake she made in her life at the same time. I don't know whether to believe her or not, but Francesca has never lied to me before. Well, until now, but I still chose to believe her.

   Her short curly hair was just above her ears, her French European skin has turned whiter by the day, and I start to pity this sickly 62 year old woman.

   "B-But, you never told me this? Fran, I-"

   "I couldn't discuss this wit you, Carmella," she cuts me off. "You just weren't ready yet."

   "Ready for what?"

    "To-" but before she could finish, she began coughing loudly. I was feeling shocked because I didn't know what to do. I kept pressing the button for the nurse to come in. Soon, a bunch of doctors and nurses barged into the room, one doctor yelled, "Oh no, we might be losing her!"

   My heart rate sped up 10 times more. Just watching this woman losing her soul was hard enough. Now I'm looking at all these doctors and nurses rush in, pressing all these buttons, hooking Francesca up to all these different wires, sticking a tube down her throat in attempt to revive her lungs with air.

   "Breathe!" one doctor screamed.

   I couldn't take it anymore. The exhilaration was too much and I was feeling petrified. Besides that, she didn't finish what she was telling me.

   "Francesca! No!" I called, attempting to push some of the doctors out of my way to see her face. Then suddenly, I hear a loud beep come from the heart monitor.

   "NO!" I scream loud enough for the entire hospital to hear me. I heard some of the doctors sigh and tisk.

   "We're too late," one nurse said as she softly sighed.

   "You got that damn right," said another.

   There was a 10 second silence until the doctor says, "Let's get her out of here."

   Suddenly, I was thrown out of the room and landed on my butt. By 'her' I didn't think they meant me. I looked up at the sign on the ICU door that says FAMILY ONLY, NO EXCEPTIONS.  I got up and walked over to the door only to see them covering Francesca's lifeless body with a white sheet. My eyes became glassy and as I blinked, a million little droplets of water came pouring out of my eyes. I then see my mom at the end of the hall and Carol walking up behind her.

   "There you are," she said relieved.

   "What's wrong? Where's Francesca?" Mom asked.

   "Yes, please. Tell me where my mother is," said Carol.

   I looked at them both for a moment until I finally told them straight up that, "Francesca's dead."

   "Oh my God," Mom said. We were both upset, but I think Carol took it the hardest. After all, she was Francesca's daughter.

   "Oh no," Carol said running around in circles until she ran straight towards Francesca's room and barged in. Mom and I both followed in after.

   "Where is she?" Carol demanded to know; the doctors were wheeling Francesca's body out of the room.

   "Miss, please-"

   "Don't 'miss' me! I need to know where my mother is now." The doctor sighed and gently lifted the sheet up, revealing Francesca's face. Carol gasped louder than I've ever heard anybody gasp.

   Carol's lips started trembling, and before you know it, she fell to the ground. My mom attempted to help her up – big fail. I could tell Carol was devastated, because she was speechless. I turned away because I couldn't look anymore, I wanted out of here, I wanted all of this to go away – I needed out of here immediately before I can't handle it anymore. I looked over at my mom who was guiding Carol to a chair and rubbing her back. I glanced around the hospital watching nurses, doctors and patients walk by. I saw the opportunity and bolted out of the ICU.

   I ran and I ran and I ran all the way down the hallway until I found the front door. I pushed open the doors and stepped outside for some fresh air. The sounds of the sirens and the people chattering away and all the noise, stopped. There weren't many people out here, it was a quiet evening. I sat down on a bench outside trying to gather my thoughts together. Then I heard Francesca's voice echo in my head, but I tried to block everything out.                                                                    

   My mind was racing, consuming me with so many thoughts in my head I couldn't control. I tried taking deep breaths to calm myself down, but it wasn't working. I was too shaken up by everything that's happened. I wiped my eyes underneath my glasses with my sleeve a few times. I didn't have a Kleenex on me or anything like that. I look down at my watch; five minutes have passed since I ran out of the ICU, and ten minutes since Francesca's death.

   This is so messed up; I'm so confused about what Francesca was telling me a million different ways. I just wish I knew what she was trying to tell me. I look around the place, people are starting to depart and go home, while some others are walking in. I glance across the street lights and see billboards flashing, red and green lights changing, the headlights of the cars are blinding me and I'm all alone out here, all by myself. I don't deserve any of this. Well at least I don't think I do anyway. I rubbed my hands together trying to warmup in my light pink sweater and jeans. It was late and cold out and I didn't want the option of going back inside again.