Chapter Four (Anthony)

I drove to the college to pick up my last real check before winter break started, which meant my check would be a smidge less.

I still felt like shit and the sunlight was making my head hurt even more, so I popped on a pair of black sunglasses and tugged my wool jacket as I sat in my car, hiding from the students that walked on by, some carrying luggage and others carrying their books around. Groups laughing, loners walked with headphones blaring, couples moved hand in hand.

What I wouldn't give to go back in time and be in college again, I thought miserably. It was so much easier to screw around and get things done at the same time. I was confident enough to know that when it came to school smarts, I was damn good. I got my work done and I easily got sucked into the subjects. I also caught onto things easily.

It's just life that I sucked at.

I sighed and forced myself to get out of my car, flinching at the bitter cold winter air that nipped my nose pink. I locked my car with the beep of the remote before I stuffed my hands into the pockets of my jacket, making my way onto the sidewalk and heading over to the main office building. A couple students called my name, giggling and waving at me.

I faked a smile easily, giving them a lazy salute in greeting before I disappered into the building, breathing a sigh of relief at the warm air inside. I shivered before approaching the front desk, where the secretary, Kelly, sat chattering away on her cell phone while she typed up some forms. As soon as she saw me, a wicked smirk crossed her lips as she tucked her cell phone against her shoulder.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Stewart. Can I help you?" She asked, her blue eyes glittering flirtatiously. I wasn't going to crush her day by telling her I wasn't interested, so I just plastered on that fake smile as I leaned a little on her desk.

"Hey, Kelly. I'm here to pick up my check." I greeted politely. Kelly beamed and nodded eagerly, twirling in her seat to the file cabinets behind her. I watched her dig around in them before my attention went elsewhere. I looked away, feeling my head protest the bright lights, but I ignored it as my eyes found a familiar face. My eyes widened and I quickly snapped my head to look away, but it was too late.

"Anthony!" Taylor came rushing over, a bright smile sweeping across his face as he approached. I forced a smile, turning to face him as Kelly worked through the files.

"Hi." I answered. Taylor seemed amused at my attempt to be nice, making his smile grow even wider as he cocked his head, leaning on the counter with his hip.

"You seem to be in a better mood. Did you enjoy your date with Seth last night?" He asked. My cheeks darkened with color as I cleared my throat, reaching to push my glasses up on the bridge of my nose.

"I guess, how'd you know about that?" I asked. I hadn't pegged Seth as a big mouth, and the fact that he told Taylor pissed me off. This was why I hadn't wanted to get involved with a student in the first place. They tell you they can keep secrets, but they ran around and told all their friends, who in turn told their friends and so on and so forth until I wound up in prison.

"I was there when you called," Taylor assured, pausing and giving me a very obvious once over, "He looked super excited. Like a puppy. I haven't seen him like that in a long time. So, are you guys serious now?" I couldn't imagine the comparison between Seth and a puppy. He was more like a wolf. A really annoying wolf that kept marking its territory all over your yard.

"No," I answered firmly now, "There's nothing going on, Taylor, and I'd appreciate it, and for lack of better words due to my hangover, if you would fuck off about it." Taylor hardly looked surprised at my retaliation. In fact, I didn't think that smile could get any bigger, but it did. He leaned a little bit closer, making me blink and my eyes widen behind my glasses.

Was he trying to flirt with me?

In public?!

"Oh, good," Taylor replied, giving me a smirk that actually gave me chills, "Because I think you're cute too and if you're not interested in Seth, you can give me a try." I winced and opened my mouth to snap at him, but Kelly was saying my name. I turned away from Taylor to grab my check from her rather rudely, ignoring her look of surprise. I snapped my head to snarl at Taylor, but he had completely vanished. I looked around, but there was no sign of him, making me scowl.

I grumbled a good-bye to Kelly, who seemed down that I hadn't tried to flirt back with her. I stuffed the check in my pocket as I went out to my car so I could go to the bank. After that, it was to the store for some good ol' booze and a night locked up with that movie I didn't get to see.

I got my keys out and stood by my car when I suddenly felt like someone was watching me. I looked up, my eyes quickly darting around behind the sunglasses, but no one was paying any attention to me. I frowned, reaching behind me to rub the hairs on the back of my neck before I got in my car.

That was just creepy.

Taylor was creepy.

I mean, I couldn't lie and say he was ugly. No way. He was cute and something about him told me he was way fiestier than he appeared. He was probably my type of guy, but then again, I thought that about everyone else too.

I mentally cursed myself. I was just desperate. I wanted attention. I wanted a reason to stop drinking. I wanted to stop feeling like shit all the time, but it was totally unrealistic.

God, I wanted a drink so bad.

I was starting to feel sick without it.

I started my car and headed over to the bank, cashing my check and collecting the money to pay off any bills I had missed before. I then headed to the grocery store with plenty of money to buy enough booze for a week. Definitely grabbing a twelve pack.

I got out of my car and headed into the store, once again relieved by the warmth inside compared to the bitter cold outside. I went straight to the refridgerated aisle, opening one of the doors and stooping to grab a twelve pack.

"There was a reason I didn't leave that beer at your house." Seth's voice almost sent me shooting through the roof as I dropped the cans back in the fridge, whirling around to see Seth standing there behind me. He was as tall and intimidating as ever, a loose dark blue beanie sitting on the back of his head and his dark bangs hanging over his face, his dark eyes watching me intently. He was decked out in a pair of torn black jeans, red and black plaid shirt under a thick padded jacket and a basket of goodies in one arm.

"Do not do that," I snapped in irritation, "And since when did I tell you I even wanted to stop drinking?" I turned my back to him again, grabbing the twelve pack and slamming the door shut, causing a couple people in the aisle to turn their heads and stare. Seth tilted his head like a curious dog as I started down the aisle. I was irritated to hear his footsteps falling in step behind me.

"I figured if you weren't drinking, you'd pay attention to more important things."

"Like what?"

"How about another date?" Seth asked. That pulled me to a stop as I turned to face him. I could remember bits and pieces of our date last night and most of it was hardly a date. It was an embarrassing attempt to socialize, but resulted in Seth jumping me, me jumping Seth in a totally different manner, then me throwing a pity party. I scowled.

"Were you born stupid or did you have to work at it?" I demanded. Seth didn't seem offended at all as he threw me that totally attractive smirk of his. Now that I took the time to look at him, I noticed a little dimple when he did that. He was adorable, and it pissed me off even more. He was making it harder and harder to turn him down.

"How about my place tonight? I'll make something for us." He responded. I stiffened, staring at him in disbelief. Oh god, this kid was serious. Why? How? Was he drunk? I didn't know what to say, so I stood there staring at him like an idiot for about a minute. He waited patiently for my response and for some stupid reason beyond me, I slowly nodded. Seth looked pleased by this.

"Great. I'll come pick you up at eight." He agreed. I just nodded numbly, then watched as he walked past me to the registers. I waited until he left before I approached the registers, still feeling completely confused.

Was this kid a masochist? Or maybe just severely stupid? Why did he insist on keeping this up? He couldn't possibly find me the slightest bit attractive. While I wasn't hideous, my personality was and the fact that he could stand to be around me was unfathomable.

And even though I kept telling myself all of this, I couldn't stop the way my chest tightened enough to make it hurt. Was I actually excited for this? A date with a student? Sure, he wasn't my student, but he was still a student nonetheless. I could get in so much trouble for this if the school were to find out. At the same time, I still felt a strange thrill.

Oh yeah, I was insane.

"Your I.D., sir?" The cashier asked, holding her hand out. I blinked and started to retrieve it, then paused with a frown as I looked at the twelve pack of Budlight beers waiting to be swallowed until I was drunk off my ass. I looked up at the cashier, who stared at me questioningly before I stepped back to look at the candy that sat by the register. I grabbed a Hershey's bar and placed it on the counter.

"Actually, can I just get this?" I asked. The cashier blinked, processing my request before she smiled and pushed the beer aside.

"Of course. That'll be a dollar." I paid the cash and took the candy bar, heading outside into the icy cold air. I couldn't believe I just did that. My legs were itching to run back in there and grab the twelve pack, but my brain was firm.

I couldn't show up for a date drunk, not like last night. That was disasterous... And maybe I did want Seth to like me. He didn't like the fact that I drank, too much anyway. He wasn't a bad kid. He was kind of weird and pushy, but then again, so was I. Was that vain? Maybe. Well, they did say you tend to date those who share the same qualities with you.

Seth was just... more mature about his qualities.

I think I just insulted myself again.

Not like I cared, surprisingly. I just wanted to get home and get ready. I had plenty of time, of course, but I didn't want to ruin this. Not for me and not for Seth. He was going out of his way to invite me to go out with him.

I headed out to my car and got in, driving along the roads slowly back home. I took my time getting inside and taking an hour long bubble bath. I clean myself up, shaving and washing until I looked relatively clean. I dressed in a pair of jeans and one of my nice dark blue button up shirt.

I felt a little ridiculous getting so prepped for a date. I was old enough to know what dates were like. I'd been on thousands of them. Hell, I'd been married for a good few months. Things like this should be easy going for me. Yet, for some reason, this date with Seth made me uneasy. I didn't want to fuck this up.

Maybe this date would actually have a third one.

I was so contradictory. One minute, the kid pissed me off and I didn't want to be around him. The next, he was being all sweet.

Like a puppy.

Ugh. Taylor was starting to stick to me and the fact that he was talking about stealing me from his brother unnerved me. Taylor was cute, saying otherwise was a lie. At the same time, something about him was very off-putting. It could just be the fact that he was the type of person to invade your personal space. I could only hope Taylor decided to stay out late tonight, so I could have time with Seth alone.

Not for anything dirty, because obviously Seth and I had something to discuss when it came to sex, but because I wanted to actually know this kid. What even was his last name? I knew he had a brother, of course, but what else? A sister? What about his parents? Other family? I couldn't be sure and tonight was my chance to at least find out what his favorite color was-- or his last name.

By the time I was done panicking and getting ready, the door bell rang and I took deep, even breathes as I came to the door, trying to rehearse what I was going to say. Seth stood in the doorway, wearing nice black jeans, lacking the tears, and a nice black V-neck sweater.

"You look good." He commented firstly. I felt heat creeping its way to my face, but I cleared my throat, grabbing my jacket and stepping out of the house.

"Yeah, well, I just grabbed whatever I saw." I answered. Seth's eyes seemed to dance in the porchlights that I left on for when I came home later. He looked boyish like this. We headed down the steps and over to Seth's car, a nice Mercedes. Where did he get one of those if he was in college? Most students just walked or road bikes, buses, taxis, trains. A car was considered a luxery.

We got in the car and I was relieved when Seth blasted the heat, making me feel less uncomfortable as I was shivering from the cold.

"So, that's a nice car you got," Seth commented as he backed out of the driveway, "I didn't think a teacher could afford that kinda stuff." I raised an eyebrow. Most people would assume that I had bought the car, when I hadn't. My sister had bought it for me as a gift before she declared her hatred for me. The fact that she hadn't asked for it back was relieving, otherwise, I'd have to walk five miles to the school in snow.

"My sister bought it for me. What about you? I'm pretty sure there's an ongoing assumption that college students are virtually poor." I returned. Seth grinned as we pulled out onto the road, heading to the intersection toward the free way.

"Mine was also a gift. My aunt and uncle bought it for me when I graduated." He responded. I suddenly remembered the photos of the older couple from his apartment. Did he live with his aunt and uncle? I was curious about his parents, but that was very obviously a no-no.

"That was nice of them." I responded. Seth nodded.

"They were nice people. Ah, but. Well. People pass." He admitted, his eyes concentrating on the road as he drove. I frowned.

"I'm sorry."

"It's all right," Seth replied calmly, "Things happen... Wish it didn't, but whatever. Bad things happen to good people." It made sense. I wondered what had happened, but again, some subjects were just left alone. We rode in silence for a while, which made me uncomfortable. My mouth felt dry and my stomach ached for food. I usually had about two beers by now, but I had completely skipped those. I was just nervous, I told myself.

"So, how did you end up in an apartment with your brother?" I asked. Seth scrunched his nose up a little, making him look adorable.

"Ah, Taylor's super clingy. He can be a real pain in the ass and he followed me to college, begging me to move in. He had nowhere else to really, so I let him stay with me. What about you? Any siblings?" He asked. I nodded, glancing out the window to watch the lights pass by.

"Yeah, two older siblings. Sister and a brother. Tracy and Liam."

"That's cool. Are you close?"

"Uhm, used to be. Haven't talked to them much lately."

"That sucks."

"Tell me about it." I agreed. It'd been a long time since I'd actually hung out with them just for the Hell of it. It didn't help that recently, Tracy had been diagnosed with breast cancer and she didn't even want to see my face. Thinking about it made my chest ache, but I didn't want to think about it.

I was relieved by the time we reached Seth's apartment. He led me inside, nodding his head in greeting to the group of students that were sitting in front of the television, a couple of them wearing snuggies and others curled under blankets. What I wouldn't give to actually have that many friends.

We went upstairs and Seth let me into his apartment. It looked cleaner this time and there was a nice smell to the place that wasn't there the last time I had been here. Seth closed the door behind us and hung up our coats before bringing me to the dinner table. That's where the great smell was coming from as the food was already set up and ready. I raised an eyebrow, glancing at Seth, who averted his gaze, looking sheepish.

"You had all this ready?" I asked, perplexed. Seth shrugged as he took his seat and I did the same, glancing around at the meals that looked almost professional.

"It needed time to cool, so I left it out. Thank God Taylor's out, otherwise, he would've eaten it all." He responded, making me smirk before I began to eat calmly. My nerves were still shot and I tried not to look panicky. I still had no idea what I was doing. This date felt far different than the others. I didn't want to fuck this up.

"You don't have to be nervous." I almost jumped when Seth spoke, making me look up to stare at him before I felt that familiar heat creeping back to my face, so I cleared my throat, taking a drink of water.

"I'm not nervous." I lied. Seth smirked, leaning forward on his elbow.

"I know you're lying because you do this thing where you look away and you look like you're about to bite your lip." He pointed out. This time, I couldn't stop the blush from hitting my cheeks full force as I stared at him. We'd only had one date before this and he already knew how to read me like a book.

I couldn't tell if that was good or bad. Either way, it made my cheeks flush to the point where Seth was chuckling as he took a bite of food. I actually felt the corners of my lips tempted to turn upwards, but I fought the urge and continued eating.

Our conversations were pretty short and to the point. While Taylor was going to school for law enforcement, Seth was taking classes in architecture and business. It was interesting to hear him talk about his relationship with his brother.

They sounded extremely close, yet at the same time, competitive. What was that called? A love/hate relationship?

"Finally," Seth said suddenly, making me look up, "You're smiling."

"I am not." I denied instantly, reaching up to wipe my mouth with a napkin, hoping to wipe the smile away. Seth raised an eyebrow.

"You're really defensive."

"I'm not."

"You are. You're doing it again." Seth added, making me huff before averting my eyes as I sat back in my chair, folding one leg over the other. I almost opened my mouth to say something when I realized how stupid it would sound, so I kept my mouth shut. Seth caught on right away.

"You can talk to me, you know," He assured, making me glance at him out the corner of my eye, "I told you before. It's okay. I'm not gonna sit here and judge you. I barely know you anyway."

"You wouldn't say that if you knew me." I responded flatly, fiddling with the glass of water, peering through it before looking up to see Seth staring at me. I frowned.

"What?" I asked. Seth raised an eyebrow and folded his arms, resting them on the table as he leaned forward to study me.

"I did pot back in high school." He deadpanned. I looked at him, caught off guard and confused.

"Huh?" I asked stupidly. Seth nodded, shrugging.

"I stole pot too. All the time, even though Taylor beat the crap out of me for it. I yelled at my aunt and uncle about it the day they died too." I felt my stomach sink.

"Seth, you don't have to--"

"Apparently I do," Seth cut me off, locking eyes with me, making me go still, "I want you to trust me. I can't ask you to do that if I don't tell you who I am. I'm Seth Rogers. I'm a third year student at Jensen Community College. I'm six foot two and almost two hundred pounds, all muscle, mind you. I had to to keep up with Taylor. My blood type is O positive. My birthday is March 8th. My hobbies include watching Saturday morning cartoons, Sudoku puzzles, cooking, and reading mystery novels."

"Sudoku puzzles?" I asked, confused. Seth smirked, cocking his head to rest on his knuckles, his arm propping his head up.

"I get super bored and it's the only thing that keeps me from doing something stupid. I took it up after I quit pot."

"How... did you get into pot anyway?" I dared to ask. I wanted for him to be sarcastic or tell me to mind my own business, but he smiled.

"To get away from everything. I was a really angsty teenager."

"You act like that was a long time ago." I drawled, making Seth chuckle.

"I'd like to think it was." He responded. I studied him as he finished off the last of his food. My chest suddenly felt tight and my heart felt like it wanted to burst out of my chest.

There was something wrong with me, really.

No, something wrong with this kid.

Why was he so nice to me? I was a stranger that burst in on him while he was showering just to puke in his toilet. I viciously refused him, then used him to get my booze, got drunk on him and tried to beat him up, yet he still managed to like me somehow.

Why?