"Kat, I told you," I slumped back in the couch, clutching one of my fuzzy blue pillows in my arms. "I don't wanna go anywhere. Brendon is coming home tomorrow night and I'd rather just stay home until then."

I brought my knees to my chest and leaned back into the sofa, holding the pillow closer. The thought of leaving this spot worried me. I didn't wanna make a wrong move and end up hurting myself. I've been thinking about things lately. By that I mean all of last night. There was no sleep to be had, as I wouldn't let myself drift off. Maybe this decision to raise a tiny person wasn't the greatest idea? What if I'm not ready? What if it grows up to be a terrible human being? All these different questions haunted my mind for the past 24 hours.

"You've been cooped up in here with only your dogs as company." She gave me a sigh as I continued to pet Bogart, who just so happened to fall asleep in my lap. Dogs were so much easier to take care of. And what's so wrong with staying home? There was nothing better to do anyways. "Please, Hannah. I don't want you stressing so much. You could loose the baby."

"So what then?!" My voice was raised and slightly cracked as I fought back tears. "What if I didn't even want a human growing inside of me?" I heard a slight rip in the pillow as I was clutching and pulling at it so much.

"Han, don't say that!" She sat next to me, placing a hand on my upper back, rubbing small circles. "This was all you and Brendon talked about when you got back from your honeymoon. You do want this. Admit it, it would be amazing to see a tiny Brendon walking around." She gave me a small smile. And I couldn't help but to smile back. That would be pretty damn cute. But I'm just...scared.

Maybe I was stressing too much. Being home without him is really pushing me to my worst. At this point, I may loose this tiny being if I stayed home.

"Where are we going?" I sigh in defeat. Bogart began to stretch out his legs across my lap before hopping off to walk over to where Penny was laying. The Boston Terrier picked up her head as he lay next to her.

"That is a secret." A wide smile formed onto her lips. "Let's just say that it's gonna be fun." Kat then grabbed my arm and pulled my off of the couch. I let out a groan as she pulled me to the stairs. "You need to change into something other than sweatpants and Brendon's old hoodie."

I looked down at my appearance and I honestly didn't understand why it mattered. The question was, was she taking me somewhere that involved a lot of effort to get ready? Because I was not up for that kind of process.

But then again, after two months of sitting at home trying to find another band to do an album cover for, I haven't exactly left the house. So maybe it'd be good to get all dolled up for a night.

~~~

After a long hot shower and about an hour arguing with Kat over what to wear, we were finally ready for whatever this thing was. We settled on one of my oversized red and black short sleeved flannel looking shirts, and a pair of bleached blue skinny jeans which I honestly didn't even know I had anymore, and they barely fit. I was such a skinny human back when I wore these literally everywhere, and even though I'm still on the skinnier side, I'm definitely not as unhealthy as I used to be. So getting into these stupid things were a struggle. That and I was starting to show I bit, so that was part of the reason.

"We gotta go before it starts!" Kat was practically pushing me out of the door.

"Alright, alright!" I let out a chuckle as I was still in the process of tying my converse. Fuck it, I'll do it in the car.

I had Kat go in front of my as we sprinted to her beat up 2010 Honda of a car. Let's just say she took this thing everywhere. She's a part time model for an agency I forgot the name of, but sometimes she gets calls from all over California and sometimes even in Florida or New York. And she's terrified of flying, so when she doesn't need to go far, she goes on her own little road trip sometimes.

We get into the car and she quickly drives off to our destination. I place my foot on the dashboard and continue to tie my shoe.

"You could have told me to wait a minute so you could do that." She kept her eyes on the road as she drove.

"I did," I reply, "but you shoved me out of the door anyway."

"I'm sorry." She said. "I'm just excited to see your reaction to this and I couldn't wait."

"I could tell." I laughed.

The next hour or so, there wasn't much of a conversation. But we did manage to find a good radio station. It had a bit of classic rock and a bit of a more upbeat kind of sound. I might have to convince Brendon to cover one of these songs one day. Though I didn't exactly know the name of any of them.

When we finally arrived at this place, I notice a huge line of people at the side of the building. Were we at a concert or something?

Kat pulled into the back lot after showing the security our 'passes' to be there. A smile was plastered on her face the entire time.

"Okay, come on." She squealed and quickly stepped out of the car. An eye roll and a shake of my head was my only response as I followed her actions.

We stepped into the building and almost immediately I was overwhelmed with the scent of cologne and sweat. And then the further we walked down the hallways, the more I smelt cigarette smoke. Pleasant.

"Kat, slow down!" I yell to her who happens to be about five feet in front of me.

"The show is about to start though!" She whined, but didn't ever look back or stop for me. "I wanna see his entrance!"

A few more moments go by, and we finally reach the backstage area where we would be able to see the entire stage. There was a mass of people in the crowd waiting for...who was performing?

Then I froze when I saw him on the far side of the stage, waiting for his cue to walk on. I was supposed to see him tomorrow. I wasn't prepared for this. Not now.

"Surprise!" Kat threw her arms into the air. "I thought it would be amazing if we came to at least one of his shows."

"Yeah," A sudden nauseating feeling washed over me, "I'll be back." I turned around and walked to where the dressing rooms were located and finally found the bathroom for the guys. I hope they won't mind me being in here.

I rested my hands against the cold surface of the sink to keep myself standing. Who is this person in the mirror I see? A woman who let's stress control her life? A woman who is afraid of looking directly at her own husband because she was terrified of how he would react? What was I doing? Why was this such a disaster?

A sudden pain in my stomach distracted my from my thoughts. I clutched the area and scrunched up my face. No. This wasn't happening. And soon I found myself sitting on the floor with my back leaning against the wall. I opened my eyes and looked around the bathroom before bringing up the courage to look down. And I honestly wish I hadn't.

~Brendon's Point of View~

Pre-Concert jitters always sucked. And honestly people think that you'd get used to it from performing all these years. But they never usually did.

"Bren," Dallon showed up behind me, handing me my ear piece, "Your wife is here." I gladly took the eat piece, and put it in my ear.

"Wait, she is?" I look around the area and I didn't see her. I wanted to apologize for my actions the other day. For being an unsupportive husband. "Where?"

"Other side of the stage." He gestured, and sure enough, Hannah was standing over there. But something looked off. Something was wrong. "Apparently Kat got them backstage passes to watch the show."

"Is it just me," I leaned closer to him and lowered my voice, "Or does it look like Hannah is bothered my something?"

"I'm sure everything is fine." He replies.

"Sixty seconds guys." Zack walked passed us. I looked back at him and said that we were ready before looking back across the stage. And Hannah was missing. Kat was still there, but she was missing. Kat and I made eye contact and I gave her a look. All she did in return was shrug her shoulders. She's fine, Brendon. You'll see her after the show and everything will be okay.

But soon the lights dimmed and the crowd screamed at the top of their lungs. Signaling there were only a few seconds. Dan quickly made his way over to the drum set and played the beginning beat of This Is Gospel. Dallon, Kenny, and I ran on stage after that. The crowd still freaking out.

I take my position in front of my microphone stand and soon began to sing the first verse.

Once the song was over, Kat ran onto the stage. Everyone was confused as she did so.

"Come with me," She spoke into my ear, "Its about Hannah." She had a concerned look on her face.

"I can't just leave the show." I replied looking back at the crowd.

"Its important." She persisted. "She's in the bathroom screaming and crying. She won't let anyone in. But she did request you."

I turned towards the audience and lifted the microphone to my face.

"Something important came up. I am terribly sorry everyone, but I have to take care of this." I put the mic back on its stand and run off the stage as the crowd boos behind me. But I didn't care.

I finally reached the bathroom and Hannah was in fact screaming from the inside. I felt terrible about this.

"Hannah?!" I knock on the door rapidly before slightly opening it. "What's going on?"

I step into the bathroom, closing the door behind me. Hannah was laying on her side, holding her knees tight while tears stained her face.

I sit down next to her and pulled her onto my lap and immediately she sobbed into my shoulder.

"Baby, what's going on?" I rub circles on her upper back.

"You're gonna hate me." I could barely make out what she had said.

"Hate you? Hannah, I could never hate you." Squeezing her tight, I kissed the top of her head. "Why do you say that?"

And for the first time, she looked up at me. Her eyes were swollen and a burning shade of red.

"I...I lost it."