First two paragraphs are sorta smut, not too much graphic detail. Nothing ya can't handle.

—

They both panted in the tangle of sheets wrapped around them. The material stuck to their sweaty skin, the scent of sex becoming the aroma in the room and sticking to the blankets with a freshness to its scent. The heady smell along with the faint whiff of roses and lavender wafted through Frank's brain, intoxicating him as he kissed all over Gerard's neck as they made love underneath the mass of white sheets and streaming moonlight from the brilliant night sky. His love felt so amazing, so soft and hot and beautiful. He held onto Gerard's hips and he quickened his strokes, listening to the latter gasp and moan from every movement made inside him. His thick and soft pale thighs were tightly wrapped around Frank's waist. Frank held onto the small amount of pudge on Gerard's hips, soon moving them to his thighs and squeezing the fleshy pale miracles wrapped around his own hips. He placed hot kisses all over Gerard's skin, moaning deep in his throat as his orgasm approached him quickly. He freely hardened his thrusts, hearing Gerard cry out and arch his back out of pure pleasure.

When they came, they came together, joining cloud nine at the same time and seeing stars behind their eyes. The only difference between them was that Gerard's eyes quite literally sparkled like there were stars stuck inside of them, or small diamonds glistening withing the olive green and gold irises. Through the gaze of sex and love, they glittered brilliantly, a galaxy of their own that Frank wished he could get lost in. He did for long moment - they simply locked eyes while they panted and felt euphoria slowly dissipating from their bodies each minute that passed them, all starting with Frank softening inside of Gerard. Frank wished he could stay lost in the foreign world Gerard carried in his eyes, but he could not stay inside the latter for the rest of the evening.

Sliding out of him, Frank shut his eyes and still breathed out slightly heavily through his mouth. He laid his head on Gerard's chest and slowly lowered his body down onto the boy. Gerard reacted by wrapping one arm around him and his free hand came up to brush through Frank's hair. Frank could hear the hummingbird heartbeat inside of Gerard's chest and the quickness of his breath. He felt the soothing rise and fall of his chest, the feeling of gentle fingers smoothing out the knots in his dark hair. Gerard's skin was smooth underneath the cheek laying on his chest. Every inch of him was delicate and soft, so warm and comforting. Frank often wondered if Gerard was only a guardian angel he imagined, or maybe even a ghost attached to his side, but Jamia and many others had seen him before. Gerard was real, a living and breathing person.

And Frank wondered how long he would be able to have him.

It hit him hard as he lay there in Gerard's warm and loving embrace. The boy he loved, that he made love to, could easily be ripped away from him so quickly that he would not even have time to register it. Everything could fall apart, someone could find them in that very moment and no one would save them. No one knew, no one understood or would ever care to try. Frank knew how horrible this was - to cheat on your soulmate with someone else you had fallen in love with, a boy of all people. The definition of an unspoken sin inside of Battery City. He was destined to get locked up somewhere cold and without Gerard's arms to keep him warm. It was horribly amazing how within a matter of minutes, you could lose everything you ever loved or lived for.

Yes, Frank did feel like his entire life he was waiting for Gerard. Gerard entered his life when he felt lost, when he was losing all hope in himself. He befriended him when all he had was Jamia and nothing ever felt right with her. Even as friends, they felt the pressure of society pushing them together at such a ripe age. Their hawk eyes were not sharp enough to see the lack of attraction, but sharp enough to see that they needed a push or else an issue would unfold. All Frank ever wanted was Gerard, but now that he had him, it was all going to waste because of a government wanting everything to go their way. And then there came the frustration, the question Frank had been asking his entire life.

What went wrong?

Everything would have been easier if Gerard were is soulmate, his Match. Falling in love with Gerard happened to naturally and even when they first met, there was a pull, like gravity was shifting and shoving them together inch by inch.

But now gravity was shifting again, teetering backwards and tearing them apart. The world was going in reverse and causing a mass destruction - the destruction of two hearts and one love.

Frank had not realized he started crying until Gerard's breath caught and he questioned the labored breaths and warm water splattering into his skin.

"Love, are you crying?" Gerard whispered and looked down at Frank with concern.

Frank tried to cover up his tears, shaking his head and biting his bottom lip hard, but a sob bubbled up and could not be contained. He let it out, a single sound broken enough to reveal how he felt inside and where his mind had gone off to. The tears were coming hot and quick now, pooling in his eyes before completely brimming over and streaking down his face like tiny rivers. His chest felt tight, as did his throat, and he felt nothing but his heart breaking even though Gerard was still there to hold him.

"It'll be okay, Frank." Gerard whispered softly, stroking his hair and shushing him softly.

"Don't lie to me, Gerard, it just makes everything worse." Frank swallowed down the lump in his throat and tried to contain the sobs that shook his body. He clung to Gerard, moving up so his face was tucked into the crock of his love's neck and his arms were tight around his waist, legs tangling with his. Gerard held him close to his body, one soothing hand rubbing his back and the other brushing through his hair.

"For just this little while, believe me when I say it's okay. We're okay right now. That's what matters the most." Gerard kissed the top of Frank's head then cradled the back of it with his hand.

Frank wanted to believe Gerard, and some part of him did, but his heart would not stop crumbling into pieces no matter what he thought about. A section of his mind would always be aware of how little time he had left with Gerard because either they would get caught or die away in here. Both situations were foul and Frank wished he had not been so reckless with the very little freedom he had. Perhaps he should have never run back to Gerard, he could save the both of them.

For now, they had to face the impossibly of their togetherness even if it was the most painful thing they had yet to experience.

—

"We need a plan." Gerard said as he uncapped a pen and and tapped it against the notepad in his lap. Frank sat there next to him, in nothing but boxers and a thick blanket wrapped around him. Gerard wore was halfway dressed in boxers and his shirt from the night before, except the shirt was unbuttoned and his pale flesh was on display, his neck, thighs and hips covered in random love bites Frank gave him the night before.

"What kind of plan?" Frank asked softly.

Gerard glanced up at him and chewed on the end on the pen. "A survival plan. How we're going to get food, clothing, other necessities. The tap water here is fine and clean because of the filtration system we put in when this place was built. There's some clothing in the drawers. We do have canned foods here, but that won't last for more than two weeks." Gerard sighed and took the pen away from his mouth.

"If we keep a low profile, one of us can go out once a week, get some things from the store." Frank started, but then a realization dawned on him that made him sigh deeply and hang his head forward.

"What is it?" Gerard asked anxiously.

Frank rubbed the side of his neck and felt the blanket fall away from his shoulders. "Money. We don't have any fucking money."

"I have a credit card." Gerard brought his attention back to the notepad and wrote something down. "There's three thousand dollars on there. It was for college but I don't think I'll be needing that after all."

Frank felt a twinge of guilt branch inside his gut. He shifted in his seat, watching Gerard scribble onto the notepad about the credit card he carried with him and my plan of going out on a low profile with it. Though he seemed to have brushed off the brief mention of wasting his college money, Frank saw this as a larger deal than Gerard made it out to be.

"Gee," Frank said softly, biting his lip. "That's your college money. We don't know if we'll ever get out of this city, what if we do and you want to get an education?"

Gerard stopped writing. He turned to look at Frank with a disbelieving expression displayed on his delicate features, eyebrows raised and incredulous. "Do you truly believe we can even attempt to escape when possibly the entire city is out looking to capture us?"

Frank shrank back slightly when he felt a tug of pain at his heart. He curled into his blanket and shook his head meekly, leaning back into the couch. He knew the possibly of them ever getting out of Battery City was not even slight, it was practically nonexistent. He could dream all he wanted to, fantasize in his mind, but nothing could defeat the reality he was fighting through. He felt his lip tremble, but he refrained from breaking down again. Last night was already enough, he hated to have Gerard see him get that way when the latter felt no better than he did.

"I'm sorry." Gerard whispered to Frank after a long moment of silence. "I didn't mean to hurt you, love." He turned to look at Frank with saddened eyes, the hazel more of a brown shade today and his lashes drooped in a sleepy manner. Specks of green still sprinkled across his shining irises, but overall, they appeared darker today.

"You didn't hurt me." Frank reassured in a gentle tone. He opened his blanket, a welcoming gesture for Gerard to partake in.

Gerard put aside the notepad and pen onto the coffee table, crawling over to Frank until he was inside the blanket and he wrapped it around his love. He wrapped his arms around Gerard and held him close to his side, feeling his warm and soft body pressing into him eagerly. Gerard rested his cheek on the top of Frank's chest and wrapped his own arms around his waist to return the gentle embrace. Frank blushed when he felt a pair of velvety soft lips brushing over his skin and pressing feathery kisses over it. Warmth bubbled in his stomach and he knew that these were the types of moments he would never take for granted again. He gently rubbed Gerard's exposed hip, the bit of extra weight making the flesh soft and pleasant to feel underneath his hand. He loved Gerard's shapely hips, the almost feminine curve of them and the soft, sensitive pale skin covering them.

"At least we have some freedom for a little while." Gerard whispered. "I've never spent more than a day or night with you."

"I know." Frank slipped his eyes shut and kissed the top of Gerard's head, gently stroking his hip and pushing his shirt upwards to run his fingers along the soft flesh on Gerard's torso. He felt goosebumps rising underneath his touch and his heart that had been growing cold warmed as he was reminded that Gerard still reacted so much to his touch even though he felt it multiple times before.

"Do you think they're out there looking for us?" Gerard turned his face and pressed his cheek against Frank's chest. "Our parents?"

Frank bit his bottom lip, lightly scratching over Gerard's side. "Yes."

"They must feel so ashamed."

"I don't care." Frank let the words slip out before he could control them, but once they made themselves known, he felt no ounce of regret weighing down his heart. At this point, he felt that he had enough with all life had thrown his way, especially since it affected Gerard just the same. He remembered the painful day where Frank had to tell Gerard they could never truly be together, that their love was taboo in a world made for dolls.

"How do you not care?" Gerard lifted his head and looked up at Frank with the same sad, droopy hazel eyes. The sunlight streaming into the room dropped lower in the sky slowly and flashed its bright beams across Gerard's eyes. His irises became a vast pond of chocolate and pond-lily green, golden and orange flecks floating amongst the pond and creating a plethora of gorgeous colors.

"I've never entirely fit in with any of the clichés this city is filled with." Frank brushed a small chunk of hair behind Gerard's ear and trailed his fingertips over the soft curve of his jawline. "I was never attracted to girls much at all, especially not Jamia. I tried so hard to love her, no one can say I went down without a fight, but I only ever felt empty when I tried with her."

"Why did you ask her to marry you if you felt nothing for her?" Gerard asked suddenly in a soft, afraid voice. He batted his lashes quickly and looked down immediately in a manner that was close to shameful, pulling his face away from Frank's hand. "I'm sorry, that's rude to ask."

"I understand." Frank whispered and leaned closer. He cupped the side of Gerard's pale and marked neck, leaning in and kissing his cheek with a tender and lingering peck of his lips. "I asked her to marry me because that is what my mother wanted. I couldn't say no to her after she bought the ring for me to give Jamia without having a good enough reason for turning it down. In this world, there shouldn't be any excuses. You were my only excuse, the only one I wished I could give that ring to, but I couldn't. I was trapped and . . . I had to do it." Frank sighed deeply when he felt Gerard pulling away to sit up. He watched as Gerard leaned forward and stared down at the floor, biting his bottom lip and brushing his hair away from his face.

"But she loves you, Frank." Gerard sounded distant, like his mind was somewhere they both were not. "It isn't fair to her. It wasn't right for me to be dreaming of and falling in love with you when Lindsey was here and still alive. She committed suicide because she felt unloved, and I can't help but feel that I was the reason behind that. That she knew I couldn't love her as my Match. I was never normal, just like you, nothing was ever easy. And sometimes I wonder - would it have been easier if you and I had never met?"

The room fell deadly silent once that last sentence ended and hung heavy in the air. It was too thick, too broad for the atmosphere to take lightly to such a large blow. It felt nearly impossible to breathe because of how utterly poisonous the words felt, prickling at Frank's skin and threatening to peel it off of his bones. He swore that his heart stopped the moment he heard a strange crack inside his chest - similar to the sound of a brick wall slowly beginning to crumble. It was still too silent, too much for his poor mind to process. He wondered if he even heard the words correctly and why it caused everything in his body to stop working. There was no pain - it felt like his insides had frozen over and he was completely numb to the cold.

"Fuck." Gerard suddenly breathed, standing up immediately and looking down at Frank with wide, teary eyes. He grabbed his hair and ripped his fingers through it, shaking his head. "Frank, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean that!"

Frank wondered if he even believed Gerard. The words were spoken with such passion as he was draining his emotions out into the open, the things stressing his mind that Frank had no clue about. He could only stare at Gerard with large eyes, watching the latter slowly begin to cry with a pale face and shaking hands.

"I'm sorry." Gerard whimpered. "Yes, I have thought about that many times and I know it sounds awful but - god, look at me, Frank, I'm still here with you and I always will be -"

"Gerard, just - don't, okay?" Frank stood up swiftly and felt the sheet wrapped around him fall away from his body and hit the floor. The cold air felt bitter on Frank's skin, but he paid little attention to it. He could feel his heart slowly breaking again, little cracks and fissures tearing apart what little amendments he had made with Gerard's help.

"I didn't want to hurt you." Gerard whispered and his eyes looked so ashamed that Frank felt his heart just tear to pieces. He watched Gerard wrap his arms around himself, tears spilling down his pale cheeks. Despite the feeling of his chest on the brink of collapsing, Frank sucked in a breath and looked away from Gerard in fear that he would also break down into tears.

"Gerard." Frank shut his eyes and swallowed the lump growing in his throat. "I know this is hard. Believe me, I have been through hell and back for you, and you are entitled to your own thoughts, but do you really believe that you would have been happier if we had never met?"

He knew Gerard would not be able to answer without breaking down into a fit of sobs. He was so fragile, the slightest thing could hurt his big heart. He was always careful with his words around the latter in fear that something might affect him. He never expected Gerard to say something so strong.

"No! I would be miserable without you." Gerard hiccuped and Frank could see him wiping at his tears from the corner of his eye.

"No." Frank exhaled softly and licked his currently chapping lips. "Imagine that we had never had the same dream. Imagine that Lindsey is still alive, that I'm not there for you to fall in love with. Everything's normal as it should be, you love Lindsey and she loves you, and you're going to a great college soon. And when you graduate college, you and Lindsey are going to get married. Tell me, Gerard, and please be honest - would you be happier if that was your life? If I had never entered your dream?"

He hated the silence that followed his question, minus the tiny sobs coming out of Gerard. He fought against every cell in his body screaming at him to turn around. His arms cried out for Gerard's body, craving to hold him close and reassure him that he was forgiven. The issue was that Frank wasn't sure if he could simply forgive and forget this. It would always be a thought in the back of his mind, a new insecurity that Gerard would never be able to be entirely happy with him. He waited on edge for Gerard's answer - he needed it or else he would die trying to push it out of his mind.

"Yes." Gerard whispered. His answer was so tiny, so quiet that it could have been passed off as a breeze outside or a draft in the house. It brushed past Frank, and his pores absorbed it, sending chills through his body as the crippling feeling of heartbreak took over. He almost fell to his knees. Luckily he mustered the strength to stay standing upright, only rocking forward a bit from the blow Gerard's reply gave him. He almost could not believe it.

But he did. Because in all honesty, he did believe that Gerard would have been happier if he never allowed himself to interfere in his love's life. They should have never reconnected at the funeral, never have kissed, never have shut their eyes and hoped for something amazing to happen once they slipped into unconsciousness.

"That's all I needed to hear." Frank nodded once, and without another word, he left the crying love of his life in the other room as he walked into the master bedroom, shutting the door behind him and numbly fixing himself on the large white bed.

Only then did he let himself cry.

—
A/N: This is a filler chapter, tbh, things get fixed in the next chapter and a lot will be explained eventually, including those damn text messages Frank would get that freaked out all out haha.

Did you like the chapter? I hope you did.

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"And I don't belong to anyone."

-aprilxo