37. Pace Yourself
"Of course she'd be there!" I yelled spinning around and doing a loop back across my room. "Is this some sort of punishment!"
I wracked my brains trying to think of any wrong doings I'd done in the past few weeks for the universe to hurl such an unpleasant reality at me.
"So quit." Tina was situated calmly amongst the pillows on my bed.
I whipped around and fixed her with a hard look. "No..."
I was torn. Quitting seemed like the most logical option. The moment I saw Margot I'd wanted to scratch out the contract and sprint right out of Cofeesio!
But something inside of me resisted. I'm not sure why. Maybe it was my stubbornness? Maybe it was the fact that I never gave up?
"I'm not quitting. Why should I?" I was talking more to myself than Tina, "Because of Margot?" I did another loop. "She doesn't get to chase me away, I'm not running from her!"
Tina didn't reply, I stopped and looked up at her for some reassurnce. She studied me slowly.
"Have you told Skyler?"
I started pacing again. "No I haven't."
She shifted a cushion and rearranged herself on the bed.
"Well you should probably do that."
I sighed deeply.
I'd resisted telling Skyler because I knew how she'd react. She'd tell me to quit immediately and get as far away from Margot as possible.
"But it doesn't even matter," I reasoned with myself, "Margot is just another person. Our history together has long past... She's just a co-worker now."
Tina said nothing. I kept glancing up at her, pleading for a nod, a "yes," just something!
"Besides," I continued with false confidence, "There are a lot of workers at Cofeesio," This wasn't true, there were six of us in total, but I was on a mission to convince Tina, and also maybe myself, "I won't even have to interact with her that much."
Tina just looked at me.
"So?" I said directly to her, "Hello! Tina!" I waved a hand frantically at her.
I'd had enough of the silence. I needed reassurnce from my best friend!
Tina sighed and leaned back. Then she got up off the couch and walked up to me.
She studied me for a good few seconds.
Then sighed and patted me on the shoulder and said, "Talk to Skyler." She walked out of my room.
I stared after her. The one time I needed her advice she refrained from giving it to me!
I sighed, deflatedly, and then followed her out of my room.
She was in the kitchen making herself a drink. I sat down at the table, resting my head in my hands.
Tina calmly stirred her cup of tea. She took a sip and then sat down in front of me.
There was a moment of silence.
"You said that Margot had to show you around the cafe?"
"Yeah." I threw my head back, "My God it was so awkward!" I dragged my hands down my face as I stared at the ceiling. "I refused to speak to her, I just nodded to everything she said."
I doubted I even had a clue what to do next week Saturday at work, because I hadn't listened to a word that she had said!
"So how exactly do you expect to work with her for 6 hours?" Tina took a long sip of tea, peering at me over the mug.
I got up, walked over to the fridge and pulled open the door. "I've got a plan." I said as I scanned the shelves.
"Mmm hmm really," I heard her take another sip, "Care to share that plan?"
I gave her a sulky look, I didn't appreciate her tone.
I took a coke from the top shelf, "Look," I closed the fridge, "I've just got to be cool around her."
Tina spluttered on her tea, and I frowned at her. This was no laughing matter!
"Sorry Riley," She laughed covering her mouth, my frown deepened, "it's just," she wiped her eyes, "I've never seen you act cool in my life!"
I wanted to be mad at her... but it was true.
I groaned, sitting back down and popping open my drink.
"What I mean is," I paused, waiting for Tina to stop laughing, "Things don't have to be weird unless we make them."
"You mean... unless you make them."
"Hey a healthy relationship is a two person job!" Not that I would say I had any sort of relationship with Margot.
"Okay," Tina said getting up, she had now finished her tea. She was still grinning, I loved how she found humor in my dire situation. "I'm going to leave now." She pushed in her chair and made her way over to the front door. "Talk to Skyler," She sniggered softly, "See what she thinks."
Tina gave me a somewhat sympathetic look and then closed the door behind her.
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"QUIT!"
I sighed, what else had I expected Skyler to say?
I leaned back against the wooden bench. We were at the park near my house. I'd decided to text Skyler straight after Tina had left, I'd figured I needed a second opinion.
I regretted it now.
Skyler was marching up and down the lawn in front of me, her big black boots flattening the grass beneath her.
"I can't quit," I tried to explain, Skyler stopped in her tracks.
"Why not!"
I took a long breath and prepared to recite the speech I'd rehearsed over in my head.
"Look Skyler it's not about Margot it's about me," I explained from her, "I can't keep running from her, this is something that-"
"What!" She exclaimed spinning around and surging forward, "Riley!" I shrunk back down into the bench. "Have you forgotten! Have you forgotten what that bitch did to you! How she treated you," I looked away from her, "Have you forgotten how she was dishonest with you! How she blamed you for everything! And then turned her back on you!"
I bit my lip as memories started flooding back in.
"Have you forgotten how she tore you apart! And how broken you were for WEEKS!"
"I-" I tried to speak.
"And I had to be there!" Skyler roared, "I was there to help piece you back together after that bitch ripped you apart!"
I gulped.
"So yes it pisses me the fuck off when you tell me oh screw it you'll just go and work with her!" She seethed, "Riley are you mad!"
I looked at her, her sharp blue eyes were like daggers. I don't think I've ever seen Skyler so worked up.
Everything she said was true.
Margot had treated me badly, she was selfish and petty. I had been a torn up wreak for weeks and Skyler had been by my side the whole time. Without her I didn't know where I'd be now.
"I know," I said softly. Skyler sighed in exasperation and plonked herself next to me.
I was silent for a moment. I watched some kids play with their golden retriever a little way away.
"I haven't forgotten what happened, how she treated me, and the pain I felt." I glanced at her, "So that's why I'll never put myself in a situation for it to happen again." She gave me a weary look. "I've learnt, Sky, I'm not as nieve anymore. I want the job because I want to gain some independence. Not because I'm trying to prove anything to Margot."
Skyler sighed and folded her arms. "It's still a rubbish idea. Can't you get a job somewhere else?"
"I could I guess." I sighed, "But I've already signed the contract for this one."
Skyler met my gaze. "Riley... I care about you." I felt my heart tense.
"I know." I replied.
"I don't want to see you get hurt again."
I smiled softly at her.
"Okay." Skyler let in, pulling her knee up to her chest, "Take the job. But if that bitch takes one step close to you... I'll beat her up until that pretty little face is completely fucked!"
"Wow." I chuckled hesitantly at her joke.
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