"I thought ninken were supposed to be, uh, y'know-- dogs." 

"How dare you compare me to some lowly mutt! Do you know what I am?

"Yes I do, you're a goddamn cat!"

"I'm the great Madara-sama you stinky brat!"

Kakashi was ready to roll his eyes and just groan.

Sakumo held back giggles at the sight, because despite the apparent failure in summoning, his son was actually bickering with a cat, of all things.

Putting aside the fact that this cat and their usual ninja dogs probably didn't even live in the same seal dimension, Sakumo was rather... intrigued, by this strange new creature.

He wouldn't call it a cat, in all honestly. Much too round and too unnaturally furred, with a strangely large head, but perhaps the impossible was possible in this world.

"You're a fortune cat!" Kakashi snapped at the tiny furball, "go to some old lady's candy store and stare waving your hand at the doormat!"

"Who are you calling a fortune cat?!" the white thing actually pounced on the naughty brat, claws out and fur bristled, "appreciate this beautiful form of mine, you with no good taste!"

Kakashi screeched as a nasty scratch tore through his cheek. He pulled out a fistful of shuriken and kunai, growling right back, "if it's a fight you want you're getting it, you piggy cat!"

And that was it.

Sakumo burst into a fitful laughter, so ready to share this entire event to literally anyone he met tomorrow.

ー

"Seriously, why do you keep showing up?"

"You think I'm dragged out of my comfortable afternoon nap willingly??" 

Today was important. They were trying to track down some dumb kid pickpocket in the street. Knowing Pakkun's nose would be essential, Rin and Obito agreed with the 'let's just rely on the dog' plan.

For once, Kakashi is the one that messes up in the mission.

"Go back! You're useless!"

"What did you say?! You summon me and I don't even get a dango as compensation for gracing you with my presence?"

"How about you try doing something so I would actually want to give you a goddamn dango! You gluttonous, piggy cat!"

"Watch your tongue, you white-haired virgin!"

Rin and Obito share a confused look. Somehow, the scene before them is so highly amusing they crack into an effortful fit of strongly suppressed laughter. 

They'd never let him live that one down. Even much after this, the two would often team up to tease the white-haired boy with the infamous cat's amazing insults.

Watching the scene from a building adjacent to them, Minato smiles fondly, because at least they're getting along better now.

ー

Kakashi soon realized, that when his chakra was full and his health was in tip-top-shape, he would definitely summon the cat somehow. It was strange-- why did that cat, which was utterly powerless as an ally, need more chakra and focus to summon?

By all means it made zero sense.

Shearing down his chakra a notch before attempting a summon made it easier for him to call his ninken. So that became a habit, and soon he forgot about the cat.

Then one day, it happens.

His chakra inflates, boosted with a soldier pill-- he doesn't think twice when he summons, thinking he'd get maybe three of them to give chase to some bandits.

Instead of three small dogs, one huge... what in the fuck is that?

He stayed with his feet on the tree trunk, chakra holding him firm even horizontally.

Before him, a large white creature dominated the forest. It was bigger than Bull, and Bull was big, but this huge white... fox, he finally recognized, was something he'd never, ever, managed to call upon before.

When the fox laughs, a deep blue light gleaming through a mark on its face, it roared. Later, Minato would explain that, that was a blinding blue flash that purified its surroundings. 

When the beast, elegant in every swish of its tail, graceful in every red emblazoned in its eyes--

Went out with a comical poof, and landed on the ground before Kakashi as the very same fat, white piggy cat he scorned to see again.

Obito yelped a very Obito-like "EHHHHH????"

Rin covered her mouth, eyes a little wide in some confusing mix of shock, surprise, and still trying to take it in at all.

Kakashi pointed at it.

He pointed at it, and frantically turned to Minato, his mask hiding most of his expression but his eyes sent the message loud and clear. Is this cat the-  what in the-  is this a cat-  or-

Minato, hands in his pockets and trying to keep his face from warping into confusion. Through the frozen stoicism on his face, he managed to sum it all up in one word:

"Aha."

Nyanko-sensei yawned.

ー

Kakashi did not like the fact that this heavy piggy cat rode on his head, refusing to go back to dog heaven until he's done consuming all three sticks of his dango and two red bean manju.

"Anyways, to think you managed to muster enough chakra to summon me in my actual form, I'd have to give you that!" Nyanko-sensei grumbled through his bites, eating unlike a cat, "so how was me? Did you glamour at how amazing I was?"

"Why the fuck are you a cat" Kakashi didn't even manage to make it sound like a question.

"Because dogs stink."

"You ARE a dog!"

They marched their absolutely not-merry way back to the Hatake estate, the annoying cat blabbering like a drunkard and the human boy trying to figure out which trash bin in the vicinity can fit this humongous cat. He wondered if it was burnable trash.

"Geez, this is why you're still a young mutt," Nyanko-sensei spat out the stick in his mouth, littering, "it's called a temporary form. You've learned the basics of Fuuinjutsu. This is one of the many forms of em." 

Kakashi scowled.

Then it clicked, "wait, you're being sealed in that retarded-looking form?"

"What are you calling retar--"

"That's so pathetic," a grin crawled up Kakashi's face, "such a grand and mighty beast forced into this fat pig form. Did you get tricked when you were taking a nap or something?"

"Don't mock me!"

"Sure, sure."

The cat's paw slapped at the boy's head but did not damage. The cat whined like a needy uncle, demanding respect the human boy was definitely not interested in giving. Kakashi was well intent on letting this blabber go on until his house, then he's gonna throw this cat down the highest cliff behind the estate and into the sea-

"Oh, something smells great," suddenly the cat's incessant complaining ceased, and a new interest sharpened him. "Is that Ramen? Holy crap! RAMEN! Hey, Kakashi! Ramen! I want Ramen!"

"No, you just ate half my pocket money's worth of food!"

"That means you have the other half of your pocket money to treat me to Ramen! Onwards Kakashi! RAMEN! TO THE RAMEN! You're going the wrong way!! KAKASHI!"

"I said NO! Stop yelling on top of my head!"

"RAMEN!!"

ー

ー

ー

Nyanko-sensei yawned.

"Sensei, you stink!" Natsume yelped upon entering his room, flinching right back, "were you out drinking with the Middle Class again?"

Groaning through a hungover headache, Nyanko-sensei slumped, belly down. 

"Misuzu brought back some heavenly wine from another continent over," he explained lazily, "who could resist?"

"Sure, sure," Natsume waved him off, dropping his bag with a sigh as he retrieved the Book of Friends and tucked it into his fanny pack. "Well then, I'm off. I'm meeting Tanuma and Taki by the riverbed."

At that, Nyanko-sensei perked up.

"Buy me some manju on the way back!" he yelled after the boy, "and some almond jelly and-"

"You get one."

The cat actually pouts at that.

Natsume scurries quickly out of the house, and Nyanko-sensei knew that in another few moments, he would get up and go after the boy, pursuing his bodyguard duty on the farce of taking a leisurely stroll.

Sometimes, he wonders when he's grown so soft.

He could care less about a lousy human kid that would die in a number of years. He was just gonna wait for him to die then he'll take the Book of Friends and he'll leave. Everything else was just out of respect for Reiko.

But when exactly did he ever have respect for Reiko? That's another excuse, isn't it?

When exactly did he begin to find some humans endearing? When exactly did he begin to feel a little sorrow whenever his favourite humans died?

Nyanko-sensei sighed, and stretched his stubby little feet.

Once upon a time, anyone could see Youkai. But at that time, not all of them were called Youkai. Some formed contracts, resided in pocket worlds, and obeyed a human's beck and call as a summoned animal.

Nyanko-sensei was like that too.

But since those days, thousands of years have passed.

Sometimes, he really missed Kakashi.

Missed complaining about his mutt stink. Missed whining about how he'd push himself. Missed curling into his bed whenever he had a nightmare and missed roaring some sense into him when his trauma gets a little too overwhelming for him to bear.

He missed his human.

But it's already been so long since then.

There was no point in dwelling any longer.

Nyanko-sensei had such a long life left to live, after all.

"Eh-UWAAAh!!"

Seriously, the second he takes his eyes off Natsume, he gets himself in trouble!