It's ridiculous how some people don't know how to comprehend a single word, and in this case the word was quiet, because as we sit in my bedroom, we being, hazel and i, the eighteen year old girl can't seem to lower her voice.

" you're telling me, that you, luna marie adams, heard our pastor masturbating ?" hazel scoffed, seeming to be in a state of disbelief, she tended to be the most dramatic with things like this, anything remotely shocking always ends up turning it into more of a big deal than it needs to actually be.

rolling my eyes i replied, " yes, hazel, and can you please be quiet, he's literally in the room next to us, these walls are so thin that if you coughed he'd hear it " she coughs dramatically in response, turning my record player on and grabbing two vinyls from my drawer.

holding two of them up she asks me to choose, " selena, and it's only because i know how much you like that song " hazel sticks her tongue out at me as she places the record down and moves the phonograph on top of it, the sound of selena gomez's' voice filing my room instantly.

" now we can be as loud as we want" she clasps her hand together as i lay back first on my bed, staring at my ceiling, soon enough she did the same laying down right next to me, " how did his moans sound, were they like whiny or real deep and sexy ?" for this she turns to me, propping herself up on her elbow as she lays on her side, eyes wide as she awaits my reply.

" i don't know, it was like a mixture in between, sometimes it'd be deep th- why are you even asking me this ?"

hazel shrugs her shoulders, " if he's watching porn it means he definitely ain't getting none from your aunt " she pauses raising her eyebrows as she stared at me, and i didn't even anticipate her answer because i knew it was going to be stupid, " shiiiit, if that was me, i'd throw it back daily, no hesitation " i mutter an almost incoherent 'oh my god' which she laughs to, knowing how crazy she sounds.

getting ready to scold her for it she cuts me off, " bitch, i have to tell you what happened thursday at service, where were you?, harry wasn't even there either anyways," remembrance of us eating ice cream in his infiniti truck invades my thoughts, the memory of him slipping his hand down the back of my dress makes my cheeks burn a rouge pink, " there was this hot ass guy luna, oh my god, his hair is like long, but not too long you know, he had like a little stubble on his chin but his arms, girl, covered in tattoos " she rambles as she finally catches my attention.

" how old is he?" is all i ask, knowing that hazel is already reckless with other things, dating or messing around, don't even get me started.

hazel looks at me as if i have two heads," how the hell am i supposed to know?, i didn't even talk to him, but he looked good enough to eat from where i sat, and you know i always sit in the back, imagine up close " she squeals, placing a hand over her chest as she sighs.

the room door quickly opens, stopping hazel from finishing her movements which was acting as if she was sucking his member, " i see you two are enjoying yourselves, sadly hazel's father is in the driveway and has been for the past ten minutes " harry sends a smile my way which i return.

we share quick farewells, with a wave goodbye to harry she's out of my room and soon the house, harry closes the door behind him after he enters, taking a seat on my bed, the memory foam dipping from his weight, " where's my dad ?" i move up to the headboard, creating distance between us, i can't be too close to this man, my mind goes wild.

" he left not too long ago, but can we talk real quick ?" i nod my head, too anxious to answer, i hate the way my heart races when someone asks me that question, harry continues, " about what happened yesterday " i hum in approval.

" what about it ?" i say softly, knowing by the tone of his voice whatever he says isn't going to be anything pleasing, he only stares at me, and i can assume that he's clawing at his mind trying to find out how to word everything correctly.

he sighs, tearing his fingers through his hair, " it can't happen again, i don't know what came over me and why i was acting that way, god, and i just wanted to let you know that it was completely unacceptable and beyond inappropriate, your aunt and i, we're engaged, getting married in only a couple of months "

it seems like he's trying to explain this more to himself than me, and i can't deny the sinking feeling in my chest, because i quite weirdly enjoyed what happened yesterday and it hurt to know that he regretted it, before he could continue and bruise my feelings more i cut him off, " i completely agree " i was lying straight through my teeth.

" it isn't gonna happen again, sorry if i made things worse, it was very inappropriate of me as well to even go along with what happened y-yesterday " i take a deep breath in, taking notice to the way he's just nodding along at everything i say, the black jumper he had on looked soft, and his head hangs low and i can't help but think how cute his hair is as it floods his face. what is wrong with me ?

harry pats my thigh awkwardly, standing up quickly to fix his jumper, " let's just forget about it yeah? "

" yea, already forgotten " the smile i send him is forced and i'm not sure if he noticed, he doesn't send me another glance as he leaves my room, closing the door gently behind him.

oh that might have been the biggest lie i've ever told, it's hard to forget the way his pupils dilated, usual fern color tinting to a more juniper one, irises raking my physique as if it wanted to know the in's and out of my skin, each blemish and each scar, that one stare from him set my body ablaze in a way that's purely insane, a heat to my body but also my cheeks when a promiscuous remark would slip past his heart shaped lips.

his cherry pink lips, that were thin but the plumpness to them made up for it, the agonizingly slow swipe he would do to his lower lip made my core tingle with want, a desire for something i've never wanted before, something so foreign to me, harry was a man, not the usual boys i would gain crushes on, a man.

there's a thin line between just a liking and infatuation, and i'm sure i've passed just liking and lust was a sin, a sin that i would commit daily, am committing daily, but it's a sin i will not repent for, because the adrenaline that went through my veins as we bantered on about something that we shouldn't have, is something that i'll never forget, no matter how hard i tried.

with my feelings on fire, guess i'm a bad liar.