Ravka was visible, it was still miles away but now that Rowan could see the land mass... the reality of their situation began to settle in their bones. It was like a weight was being pushed down onto their shoulders as they stared at the waves blankly.

Matthias found a spot where the wind didn't try to throw him over due to his height. He was curled up against the side like a child, it made Rowan laugh when they saw him. "Are you alright?" He asked, raising his voice so it didn't get swallowed by the ocean.

Rowan glanced down at him, he was by their feet, wrapped up in a thin blanket. "Yes, why wouldn't I be?"

"Because... I don't know." He shrugged, pulling the blanket tighter around his shoulders.

"I'm fine... just... nervous." Rowan pushed their hair behind their ears, it was much longer than they liked but it had to be for their cover. You'll be a teenage girl. They hated that more than being in Fjerda. The people weren't even that bad, it was just the Drüskelle that made Rowan incredibly nervous.

He nodded, "It will be okay, djel will make sure."

That made them chuckle, "I haven't heard that in a while."

"It's been hard when I feel like I've betrayed my goddess."

"How so?"

Matthias pulled at a loose string, "Much like the Drüskelle, we're told that Grisha are rotten even religiously. It has been at the back of my head since you showed your abilities."

Rowan nodded, "I'm sorry. That must be hard."

"It could be worse, I could be on my way back to Fjerda to be killed for treason."

"What'd you do with Matthias?" Rowan asked, sad upon hearing his admission of fearing his fate. They felt horrible knowing what might be to come.

"I washed him away when I bathed." He said quietly, Rowan barely heard him.

—

The pair were forced back below deck when they got into Ravkan waters. The ride was much smoother, tidemakers were stationed on buoy-like structures in order to calm or rile the water when needed. They pushed the boat inward to the port, making the end of the ride much quicker.

"Okay, let Rowan and I do the talking. You're a threat enough just for... fucking breathing. This isn't me joking, Drüskelle, this is your life we are talking about. And Rowan seems to want to keep you alive so I will honour my friend's wish." Nina said, staring into Matthias' eyes deeply.

Rowan nodded with her, "Please do not speak, even if they say something that bruises your pride or ego. Ravka may be modern but we don't jest when it comes to Fjerdans. Least of all a Drüskelle." They mumbled, eyes heavy with emotion.

The two Grisha teens stood side by side in front of Matthias. Rowan spoke quietly to their best friend.

"Please listen for threats, yes? I can't do much without getting myself killed."

Nina squeezed their hand, "You have my word, Yulianova."

Rowan smiled grimly, "Thank you, Zenik."

The three young adults came above deck slowly, Rowan knew nothing would happen but having a Drüskelle in tow wasn't exactly a good thing. Matthias stayed silent, literally and physically. He walked slowly and softly, it was mad.

It was nerve-wracking for Rowan, they couldn't see anyone on the dock that looked like Jensin. Just masses of Keftas and one man in a black kefta; The Darkling. They choked up at the sight of him, he looked the same–unsurprisingly. Rowan's grip on Nina's hand was borderline bone breaking but she didn't mention it.

The closer they got, the more anxious Rowan felt. By the time the three stood at the bottom of the ramp, an applause erupted, Nina pulled away from Rowan but stood by Matthias' awkward form as a small group of people dressed in blue keftas with the same symbol embroidered over their heart stepped forward.

Rowan couldn't stop themself from running and nearly tackling Jensin once they saw him. It was like everything slowed down as the siblings collided. Jensin's hug was as tight as Rowan's hold on him. The tears were falling before they could be stopped.

"I am so happy to see you are alive, sister." He kissed the top of their head and Rowan didn't let go.

They saw Zoya among the group, she gave Rowan a smile which was more than Rowan ever got from Zoya before. For just a second or two, Rowan forgot all about what they went through in Fjerda. They forgot about the cold, the pain, the fear... they forgot about Matthias and for one solid second–Rowan felt genuine happiness to see all of the Sem'Ya there to welcome them home.

But once Rowan pulled away from their brother, they locked eyes with Matthias and it all came crashing down. They left his side. Embarrassment and regret leapt onto Rowan as they moved to stand between the large mass of Grisha soldiers and the Drüskelle boy.

They saw how The Darkling watched them intently. It was something else that pulled them out of that fleeting moment of happiness. His gaze was heavier than the fear Rowan felt for what might happen next.

"Welcome home, Rowan Yulianova." He announced and a hush fell over the group. Kirigan's eyes fell on Matthias, "I see you completed the task, or am I mistaken?"

Rowan's throat closed up as Matthias looked at them for an explanation, "You're not mistaken, sir." Nina had the same guilty look on her face. Rowan felt terrible from the moment they met Matthias for what they were doing.

"That's a new one, so what is his name?"

Matthias opened his mouth but Nina shook her head, he stepped back. "Matthias Helvar." Rowan said his name firmly, "I wanted to talk about what you plan–"

General Kirigan cut them off with a single look, "What I plan is for you to be reunited with your family so your parents stop threatening to retreat. Go home, Rowan. That is an order."

They stole a glance at Matthias, the guilt squeezing them around the neck, "What of him?"

"The Drüskelle? What about him?"

Among the Grisha, gasps could be heard. They didn't know he was Drüskelle. "What will happen to him?" Rowan asked, not meeting Kirigan's cold eyes.

He shrugged, "Nothing to concern yourself with, child."

Rowan gritted their teeth, fighting against the urge to talk out of turn. They saw how Jensin was telling Rowan with his eyes "Do not do it." But Rowan couldn't help it, the words were out before they could stop them. ("I am concerned, though.")

"I did not tell you to question my authority, I said to go home and leave the boy to me. What is unclear?"

Rowan finally glared at Kirigan, "Nothing. I just want to make sure he will be unharmed."

This caused quite a stir. Why would any level-headed Grisha care about some Fjerdan boy? Especially a Drüskelle? Even Zoya showed a reaction, genuine surprise painted the Tidemakers face. Jensin looked painfully conflicted, Rowan knew his expression perfectly.

General Kirigan stepped toward the teenagers, and Rowan took two steps back, pushing Matthias with them. "Interesting." That was all he said and it made Rowan's guard go up even further.

Matthias held onto one of Rowan's forearms, and Nina looked as though the hair on the back of her neck was standing up straight. Rowan's was, they felt a terrible sense of dread settle into the bottom of their stomach.

There was something off about the situation, Rowan didn't like the casual air of it all. Kirigan was being forgiving, letting himself into temptation. Asking questions instead of just giving orders.

Rowan and Nina looked at one another, they were both risking everything. Their reputations, their status, and their livelihood.

"You have grown attached to him? That is... not what I expected but you are the only one to have returned thus far."

"Returned?" That was Matthias. It was so quiet, a pin could fall and echo on the dock. The air felt electrified.

Rowan knew that was the telltale sign of a Squaller using their powers, they braced themself in case. But when Kirigan lifted a hand, the feeling in the air stopped.

"Funny." He seemed honestly amused as he stared Rowan down.

There was a line of sweat running down their neck due to the tension in their body.

Kirigan paced the dock, "I suppose it should have been a possibility to have been considered, but you...?" He chuckled dryly. "Wait until your parents hear of this one,"

"Where are they?" Rowan tried, forcing their voice out.

"On their way, actually."

They gulped and nodded, "Let him go. Please." Nina looked at Rowan like they were crazy. "I can find another. Someone better."

"Everyone but Zoya and Jensin, go."