I woke up with the sound of rain on the roof. It had been raining a lot lately. I wondered if the weather reflected my mood. The letter was still next to me, and I threw my blanket over it. 

How could I let go of him? He was my father.

I pulled on shorts and a sweatshirt, and went downstairs. As soon as I reached the living room, Adam scooped me up in huge hug. "Good morning, Hadley!"

"Good morning, Adam."

We both were quieter when we saw that Bridget was asleep in the rocking chair. 

"I need to go somewhere else." I whispered. "This place is just too..."

"I know the feeling." He whispered back. "How about we leave Bridget a note, and we head down to the lake for a swim?"

"Cool."

We left a note, and then sped off down the dirt road. We just grabbed some towels and didn't bother changing.

Roll down the window and let the wind blow back your hair,

Well, the night's busin' open,

These two lanes could take us anywhere.

"I forgot to ask you. Did you read that letter that your father gave you?"

Without warning, I burst into tears. Adam pulled over so he could give me a hug, shutting out the cruelness of the world. He sang softly into my ear as I sobbed in his chest.

Where was I when the rockets came to life?

And carried you away into the alligator sky?

Even though I'll never know what's up ahead,

I'm never letting go, I'm never letting go!

"It's alright, Hadley." He whispered gently. "Let it out. You're ok."

"He told me to leave. He wanted me to go." I wept. "He had no idea that he was going to die. I need him now. He was always there for me, but I avoided him. I ignored him. I'm only fourteen, what am I going to do?"

If you're alone in this awful downpour,

Then struggle free and paddle out the cellar door. 

"Bridget will take care of you. I'll take care of you. I'm not leaving Blue Lake until I know that you're safe and sound. You're not alone. We're here for you."

"But that's the thing, Adam. I don't want to go with Bridget. She's not Dad. She will never be Dad. You're the only person in the world who cares about me."

"That's not true. She cares about you."

"I just don't want to let go." I said, my words muffled by his t-shirt. He ran his hands through my hair protectively and reassuringly.

"You have time, Hadley. You're going to be ok. I'm here for you."

I finally stopped crying, and Adam let go, even though I didn't want him to. He held my hand the rest of the drive though. 

Once we arrived at the lake, I slipped off my sweatshirt and tossed it in the car. The wind whipped through my hair as I leaped off the dock and plunged into the water. The cold shocked me for a moment, but then, as I floated, I got used to it. Adam jumped in next to me. 

But instead of coming up, he stayed down. 

I clawed around in the water, wondering if he was stuck on something. But then I felt hands grab me and lift me out of the water. Adam held me in his arms, smiling. 

"Adam Young, don't do that again!" I said, splashing him with water. 

He laughed before he said, "Sorry, Hadley."

We swam out a bit farther, and I made sure that I could always touch the bottom, because I was wearing sweatpants and they weighed me down. 

Soon, Adam and I had a water war going on. Without knowing it, we both swam deeper into the lake. I was starting to get tired. 

Then it happened. We hit a drop-off. 

This lake has a bit of an undertow. A man went swimming at night once, and he drowned because of it. 

I guess it was looking for another victim. 

I tried to bring my foot down on the sandy bottom, only to realize it wasn't there. A wave caused by a boat's wake crashed over me. My legs were so tired I couldn't kick anymore. I went under.

Swimming against the current was no use, but I fought it, my lungs screaming for air. Where was Adam? I thought I heard splashing, but it could have been my heart beat in my mind. I involuntarily took a breath and water filled my mouth. 

Red dots danced before my eyes. I knew there was no hope of me surviving. I was going to die. 

Goodbye, Adam. Goodbye, Bridget.

Hello, Dad.

The last thing I saw was a hand reaching for me.

"Hadley?"

"Hadley?"

"Hadley, it's Adam. You're safe now. You're alright."

I opened my eyes, but my vision was blurry. I was on the dock, with Adam kneeling next to me. 

"Hadley!" He cried, tears in his eyes. "Oh, thank the Lord."

He spent the next few minutes spitting up water and breathing heavily. I tried standing up, but Adam made me sit. 

Adam was sobbing, holding my hand. He didn't want to hug me, because he was afraid he might hurt me on accident. "I thought you were dead."

I threw my arms around him. "You saved my life." I said. Hot tears streamed down my cheeks onto his wet face. I kissed his nose. 

As I continued to hug him (and occasionally cough up water), a man pulled up in his car, hoping to cruise around the lake in his boat. He hopped out and walked over to us.

"Are you two alright?" He said, eyeing up our soaking wet bodies. Adam helped me up slowly. 

"We had a bit of an accident. We're alright now though. Thank you for your concern."

"Do you need some help carrying her up to your car?" 

"If you want to."

He helped Adam carry me, since he didn't want me walking until I was fully functional again. I thought that was a bit much, but I didn't protest.

Once Adam thanked the man and got into the car, he slammed his hands on the steering wheel. I was a bit surprised about this outburst. He put his head in his hands. 

"I should have helped you sooner." He said, angry with himself. "You could have died, and it would have been my fault."

"It wasn't your fault-"

"Yes it was." He cried out, putting his head in his hands. 

"No, it wasn't. You can't blame yourself for this."

"I just can't lose you," He said, finally looking me in the eye. His big brown eyes were filled with a sadness that was unimaginable. "I can't lose you...like I lost Annmarie."

It hurt for me to see him cry, like it would hurt to see your parents cry. I wrapped my arms around him. 

"You're not going to lose me. I promise."

Once we got home, Bridget made me go change clothes. Adam wanted to tell Bridget what had happened, but I shot him a look and he was silenced. I didn't want her to know, because I did not fancy a trip to the hospital.

I came down in a tank-top and shorts as it started to rain again. Adam went back to his cabin to dry off and get a new change of clothes. 

We reunited, and Bridget suggested that we go out for lunch. There was a good restaurant in Blue Lake that served hamburgers and milkshakes and all kinds of good stuff. It was called Honeybee's. I gave her directions there. I knew that she must have wanted to tell me something, which was not a good sign.

The waitress came and took our order. I wasn't very hungry, but Bridget ordered a slice of apple pie for us to share.

"So, Hadley." Bridget began, setting her hands on the table. "I was thinking about everything, and I think it would be best if you come to live with me. Adam agreed, after all I live in-"

"I don't want to go and live with you." I said, as serious as a fourteen-year-old could. "I want to stay here."

Bridget bit her lip in nervousness. She didn't say anything else about it, instead, she started up a conversation with Adam about the Minnesota Twins. 

I took a bite of my apple pie, and for some reason it tasted funny. I started to sweat.

Then it happened.

Adam's POV

I saw Hadley out of the corner of my eye sink against the booth seat. She looked suddenly exhausted, and her forehead was slick with sweat.

"Hadley, are you alright?"

She shook her head. I called the waitress over.

"What is in this pie?" I asked, nervousness creeping into my voice. Panic started to flood my veins. Bridget looked worried too.

"Um...flour, baking soda, apples, cinnamon..." She began. 

My eyes widened, and my ears wished that they had not hurt that. "She's allergic to cinnamon! She told me so!" I picked her up out of the booth seat, and went running out the door, Bridget in tow. 

No, no, no! Can't lose her again! 

I can't lose her.