Kirai : *closes a cabinet*

*a crash is heard behind the cabinet door*

Jackle : What was that?

Kirai : The sound of someone else's problem.

🐉

Jackle : Do you want to know your gay name?

Kirai : My... my gay name?

Jackle : Yeah, it's your first name-

Kirai : Haha. Very funny Jackle -

Jackle : *gets down on one knee* And my last name.

Kirai : Oh- oh my god.

🐉

Jackle : Come to dinner tonight. I can't cook, but I'll bring plenty of free wine.

Kirai : Marry me.

🐉

Jackle  : Swear words are illegal now. If you say one you'll be fined.

Kirai : Heck.

Jackle : You're on thin fucking ice.

Jackle : Oh no-

🐉

Jackle : Hey, what's the name of the guy who lives down the hall?

Kirai : His cats' names are Walter and Rose.

Jackle : That's not what I asked.

Kirai : That is all the information I have.

🐉

Kirai : *texting* Hey can you pick me up I'm drunk.

Kirai : Oh you don't have to anymore. I'm home now.

Jackle : Yes, I'm aware of that after dropping you off at home.

🐉

Jackle: Just be careful, Kirai !

Kirai : *heading out the door* I'm always careful, Jackle !

Kirai : It's everything around me that's careless.

🐉

Jackle : You are a solid 11/10.

Kirai : Aw, thank-

Jackle : Which is 1.1 because you look like shit.

🐉

Jackle : What's the dumbest thing you believed as a child?

Kirai : That naptime was a punishment.

🐉

Jackle : I have a problem.

Kirai : If it's harder than 2+2, I can't help.

🐉

Kirai : If it pleases the court I would like to say that my opponent is TALKING SHIT!

Jackle : ...

🐉

Jackle : Someone care to explain why we have 6 dogs in our apartment?

Kirai : They're golden retrievers, dude. They retrieve gold. I did this for us.

🐉

Kirai : Do dragons fart fire?

Jackle : I don't know.

Kirai : I thought you went to college.

🐉

Kirai  : My assistance will be an act of beneviolence.

Jackle : ...Don't you mean benevolence?

Kirai : No.

🐉

Kirai : We have fun, don't we, Jackle?

Jackle : I have never been more stressed out in my entire life.

🐉

Jackle : I still have no idea how I'm attracted to you...

Kirai : Yeah, well, you're stuck with me, and no take backs, honey.

🐉

Kirai : I like your new pants!

Jackle : Thanks, they were 50% off!

Kirai : I'd like them better if they were 100% off. *winks*

Jackle : The store can't just give away clothes for free.

Kirai : Thats's... not what I meant.

Jackle : That's a terrible way to run a business, Kirai .

🐉

Jackle : Look, last night was a mistake.

Kirai : A sexy mistake.

Jackle : No, just a regular mistake.

🐉

Kirai : So you like cats?

Jackle : Yeah.

Kirai : *tries to impress them by slowly pushing a glass off the table*

🐉

Kirai : Talk dirty to me, baby~

Jackle : The dishes.

Kirai : Wh-

Jackle : They've been there for 4 days and it's your turn to wash them. You still haven't cleaned them and I have asked you to do so several times.

🐉

Kirai : Relationships should be 50/50. Jackle cooks us dinner while I sit on the kitchen counter looking pretty.

🐉

Jackle : *seductively takes off glasses*

Jackle : Wow...

Kirai : *blushes* Haha... what?

Jackle : You're really fucking blurry.

🐉

Jackle : We have a problem.

Kirai : No, YOU have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps making them.

🐉

Kirai : This date is boring!

Jackle : This isnt a date. I said I was going to the store.

Kirai : Then why did you invite me?

Jackle : I didnt, I specifically said "dont come with me" then you said " fuck you Jackle I'll do whatever I want!

🐉

Jackle : I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.

Kirai : But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.

Jackle : O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns??

Kirai : Is it working?

🐉

Kirai , to Jackle : We had a date!

Kirai : *aggressively points to Hello Kitty Coloring Book*

🐉

Jackle /: I love them both, but how do I propose to two people?

Kirai : Two different restaurants, one person at each restaurant. Twice the dessert, twice the applause.

Jackle : Won't people think it's weird if there is a third person just sitting there, though?

Kirai : I saw someone feed their pet peacock crème brûlée from their mouth at the French place on the corner last week: I think faux third-wheeling at an engagement is the least of your worries.

🐉

Kirai : I love you.

Jackle , not paying attention: What was that?

Kirai : I said I'm selling you to the zOo-

🐉

Kirai : I was going to suggest we do Marilyn Monroe and JFK roleplay, but I'd get way too into it.

Jackle : What- how?

Kirai : You'd be like "come to bed ... Mr. President" and I'd be like, "I need to increase the amount of American military advisors in South Vietnam by a factor of 18."