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Arty x Cammy AKA Husband and Wife

Arty: Let's watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Cammy: Okay.

Arty: And make out during the scary parts.

Cammy: Th-

Cammy: The scary parts.

Cammy: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Arty: Ew. What kind of tea is this?

Cammy: I boiled gatorade.

Arty: *angrily presses Cammy against a wall* WHERE'S THE MONEY?!

Cammy: ...

Cammy: Are we about to kiss-

*at a zoo*

Arty: What are they in for?

Cammy: Arty, this isn't prison.

Arty: So they can leave?

Cammy: No, but-

Arty, pointing at a meerkat: I bet that one murdered someone.

Cammy: I think you're still suffering the effects of your party last night.

Arty: All I drank was Redbull!

Cammy: How many?

Arty: Eighteen.

Cammy: *walking around disappointed after visiting an aquarium*

Arty: Cammy, what did you think a tiger shark was?

Cammy: Sleep is the body's best safety mechanism.

Arty: How so?

Cammy: It keeps you from screwing up for 8 hours.

Arty: What's your favorite color?

Cammy: Stop asking stupid questions. Ask me something logical and mature.

Arty: How many moles of sodium bicarbonate are needed to neutralize 0.8ml of sulfuric acid at STP?

Cammy: My favorite color is pink.

Cammy: Do you know a turtles only weakness?

Arty: No... well, their slowness.

Cammy: Their weaknesss is they can't roll over when they are on their backs.

Cammy: Now I have a plan.

Cammy: If I duct tape two turtles together, they'll be unstoppable.

Cammy: *sees someone doing something stupid*

Cammy: What an idiot.

Cammy: *realizes it's Arty*

Cammy: Wait, that's MY idiot!

Cammy: Can I have some?

Arty, mouth full of cheesecake: It's really spicy, you wouldn't like it.

Cammy: Are you having another depressive episode?

Arty: A depressive episode?

Arty: I'm having a depressive series and we're just on season one.

Arty: You look like a corpse that was just pulled out of the river.

Cammy: Wrong. I look like a cool rock star who just OD'd in their own pool. Big difference.

Arty: I think I just figured something out. I got to go.

Cammy: Aren't you forgetting something?

Arty: Uuh...*hesitantly kisses Cammy's forehead before running out.*

Cammy: No, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?

Cammy: You know what's funny about Arty? They're my best friend, and anyone who'd hurt them is someone I'd murder, probably.

Cammy: You are a solid 11/10.

Arty: Aw, thank-

Cammy: Which is 1.1 because you look like shit.

Arty: Are you mad?

Cammy: No.

Arty: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?

Cammy: *eating a cinnamon roll*

Arty: Cannibalism.

Cammy: *confused chewing noises*

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