"Why didn't you tell me you already told your dad about us?" I asked when he pulled over near the crag, I looked outside the window to see no one in there.

When I asked Oxygen to take me in a place where I can find peace after he asked me where to go, he brought me to the perfect place. It's so quiet outside, even the road was empty. I don't know where we are and it looks scary dangerous that it's only us in here, but I trust Oxygen. He'll keep me safe.

"Sorry," was his simple reply.

It annoyed me because I was expecting a more significant answer from him, but it seems like he wasn't going to give me that. I watched him kill the engine of the car. "You should've given me a heads up, hindi 'yung ganito. Mabibigla na lang ako na pupunta yung mommy mo sa Bahay, I mean that's okay if I was alone in there. But my mom's with me-"

"Sorry na sabi ko 'di ba?" Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero parang galit siya. "Hindi ko alam na pupunta si mama sa inyo. Hindi ko nga alam na nasabi na pala sa kanya ni papa, pasensya ka na. Oo nga pala, ayaw mong malaman ng mga magulang mo o ng kahit sino. I should've counted my parents out of this secret."

I frowned on the way he said the word secret. "Ano bang problema, Oxygen? Nagtatanong lang naman ako."

Diretso pa rin ang kaniyang tingin sa harapan, while I turned to fully face him.

"Hindi ko naman sinasabi na hindi 'to pwedeng malaman ng mga magulang mo, ang akin lang sana sinabihan mo 'ko na nasabi mo na sa papa mo. Kasi napagusapan na natin 'to 'di ba? Akala ko naintindihan mo 'ko-"

"Naintindihan, wala naman problema 'dyan. Lagi naman kitang naiintindihan. Kahit mahirap, kinakaya ko naman intindihin. Basta sinabi mo, naiintindihan ko." He cut me off, turning his head on my side. "Pero ikaw ba naiintindihan mo 'ko?"

"Oxygen, ano ba 'to? Simpleng tanong lang naman 'yon, I just want you to answer me-"

"Sinabi ko na 'di ba? Hindi ko alam na alam na ng nanay ko 'tong sikreto natin." Mariin ang pagkakabanggit niya sa salitang sikreto, the more I'm confused. "Had I known, I would've stopped her from barging in your house without notice. Sa tingin mo ba gugustuhin ko na ipahamak ka? Na maipit ka? Gabbana, if I can do that I would've told your mom that you're pregnant the first time we met. I have given you so much time to adjust and even willing to give more, hindi pa ba sapat 'yon? Kulang pa?"

I was stunned, for a moment I couldn't react. All I can see is the pain in his eyes. It's more prominent that it was the moment I've asked him to keep this a secret.

"Kung iniisip mo na basta ko lang sinabi 'yon sa tatay ko, dahil wala lang, trip ko lang. Gabbana, hindi. You can't imagine how hard it was for me to go home every night and see the woman trying to ruin me, perfectly doing it. Ilang beses ko nang ginusto na sabihin sa nanay ko na hindi ko naman 'yon nabuntis, na ikaw naman talaga. Hindi ko ginawa, because I know you wouldn't like it." He said in a gentler tone now. "You wanna know what made me say it?"

I tried opening my mouth to say something but I couldn't find my voice, tears sting my eyes. I slowly shook my head.

"I was there when Thalia cried watching Trigger trying to survive death. I've witnessed it and realized that there are some things we have no control over, they're unexpected. And that if I ever had it coming, I have one secret I can only trust to my most trusted person. Which is my dad." He blew an air. "If there's one thing that I'm not sure anyone will ever understand, it's the bond I have with my father. Same goes to you and your mom."

And that's where he's wrong. I think I understand him better now. I looked straight into his eyes, how could I hurt this beautiful man? "I'm sorry. I- I didn't know you were hurting."

"See how you affect me? I was never vulnerable and right now I feel like you can easily break me. I never knew I'd be this sensitive, I used to care less of what people has to say. But you? Even the most meaningless word, if it's from you, it will matter to me. This is all new to me, Gabbana."

I unbuckled my seatbelt and inched closer to give him a hug, a real strong hug as I cried. "I love you, too."

Naramdaman ko ang pagsukli nito ng yakap, kaya mas hinigpitan ko pa. I would never trade moments like this with Oxygen even for million dimes.

Waking up to hear Camille Syanna and Moana Marie fighting is something that I have to get used to, I guess. I rolled my eyes and watched them arguing while I eat my second slice of peanut butter pie Tita Moana brought me.

"Enough with that, Gabby! Do you want your hips to go wide and your thighs to get thick?" Mom warned me about getting fat. "I've made you a raw salad, I googled it and it says it's safe for your pregnancy and thus won't make you fat!"

"Safe ang peanut butter sa buntis, Camille, wag kang ano dyan. It promotes immune tolerance and help protect the child from nut allergies. Hindi ko na kailangan pang i-google, matalino ako kaya alam ko." Sagot naman ni Tita Moana habang hinihiwaan pa ako ng isa pang slice. "Tungkol naman sa pag-taba, problema ba 'yan? Edi mag-yoga! Para hindi ka na maabala pa, ako na ang mag-eenroll sa kanya, sa yoga class ni Audrey. Hindi cheap 'yon wag ka mag-alala, kaya tumahimik ka na at pabayaan mo yung anak mo na kainin lahat ng peanut butter na gusto niya. Kung gusto mo, makikain ka nalang sa'min."

Tita Moana turned and winked at me. I grinned like a little kid saved from stealing chocolates at the fridge.

"No way! Eeew with three e and a single w!" Now that's my mom.

I shook my head and just focused on eating and getting fat. When I'm eating, I feel like I don't care if this will make me huge. But when I'm in front of the mirror trying to dress myself up, that's when all the guilt setting through. Ah, I only live once, I should enjoy life and this peanut butter.

"Mom, can I visit dad today?" I told her that, halfway of finishing my third slice. I'm thinking that the fourth would be my last. One for each of us hehe.

It took her awhile before she said yes and stood up, leaving me and Tita Moana with our peanut butter pie.

When I came home last night, dad was already gone. I haven't talked to him yet and I know that I have to. That's why I asked mom's permission, I don't want her to think that I'm ignoring what she has to say about my plans in everyday life. I maybe a grown up now but still, I have a mom to consider.

"I'm sorry, Gabby."

Confused, I turned to see Tita Moana looking at me. "Po?"

"The first time I saw you, I thought you look exactly like your mom. Your face, your poise and even the way you talk and move. Pinaalala sa'kin lahat ng galit na meron ako para sa mga magulang mo." She said, I was about to ask her why is she so mad at my parents and what did they do, when she speaks again. "Akala ko, 'yon ang dahilan kung bakit naiinis ako sa'yo. Pero ngayon narealize ko, hindi. Hindi ako 'yung tipo ng taong nandadamay ng inosente sa galit ko. Then I realized, I was scared."

Scared of what? Moana Marie? I can't imagine her being scared.

"Oo, Gabby. Natakot ako." Nakangiti siyang tumango sa akin na para bang nababasa niya ang mga tanong na meron ako sa aking isipan. "Natakot ako kasi baka malapit na, malapit ng may makadiskubre ng pagkatao ng anak ko na kami lang ni Exodus ang nakakakita. Ayoko, e. Pakiramdam ko, makukuha siya sa'kin. He's my baby, kahit pa gaano siya tumanda, he'll always be my Oxygen. Maiintindihan mo rin ako. Pero syempre, hindi ko kontrolado iyon. May puso ang anak ko, siya ang masusunod. Buhay niya 'yan, e. At alam ko na darating araw na 'to, 'yung kahit na gaano pa kasama ang tingin ng lahat kay Oxygen alam ko na meron isang tao na may malinaw na mga mata, makikita siya sa kung paano ko siya nakikita at pag-nangyari 'yon alam ko na 'yung tao na 'yun hindi mahihirapan na mahalin ang anak ko."

I smiled in between my tears. The tears that I haven't noticed falling from my eyes. Maybe this is really pregnancy going. "Oxygen is the loveliest person I have ever known, he's selfless and caring and all thanks to you. You have raised him well and I'm so, so in love with your son."

"I know you will be that girl. The one who'll change my son's ways. Just the fact that he brought you with him in an intimate family bonding that we've grown accustomed of, I knew it from there, he's in to you." She smiled at me, I'm happy to know that she's okay with me being the love of Oxygen's life. "Kaya medyo nadismaya ako nung may pumunta sa main office ng foundation para sabihin na tatlong buwan siyang buntis at ang anak ko ang ama. Akala ko nagkamali ako, that you two didn't work."

"Oh that Cassandra!" I snapped in irritation.

Mahinang humalakhak si Tita Moana. "Alam ko naman na, una pa lang na hindi si Oxygen ang ama ng batang dinadala niya."

"H-ha? How?" I frowned in confusion.

"Gabbana, mamamatay tao ako." Nakakalokong muli siyang tumawa, hindi ko tuloy alam kung nagbibiro ba siya o ano. "Isang tingin at alam ko na agad kung sino ang sinungaling."

"T-then why did you bring her to your home?"

"Buntis siya, sa lahat ng sinabi niya, 'yon ang totoo. I don't have a heart to let her be, kailangan niya ng matutuluyan. Kailangan niya ng pagkain, vitamins, lahat. At isa pa, kailangan ko siya para sa plano ko." A wicked smile curved her lips.

"Plano?" Lalo akong nalito. "Anong plano?"

"I was waiting for Oxygen to mention you and he's not doing it. I was hoping he'll fight me and tell me that he's in love with you. That didn't come, I'm getting more and more frustrated." She rolled her eyes. "Hanggang sa 'yun, sinabi sa'kin ni Exodus na nakabuntis nga ang anak niya..." Kumibit ang kaniyang balikat. "At ikaw iyon."

I can't help but groan inwardly, this woman is clever. "And what will happen to Cassandra now? She can't just get away with it!"

"Oh of course," ngumisi siya. "But you know, that woman is naïve. Mahina. Kinausap ko siya, nalaman ng mga magulang niya na nabuntis siya ng pamilyadong tao na hindi siya handang panagutan. At hindi ko maintindihan, kung paanong nakuha pa siyang itaboy ng mga magulang niya sa kabila ng mga pinagdadaanan niya. I mean, don't they care about their grandchild? Maaring galit ka sa anak mo, pero anak mo 'yan, e. Kahit ano pa maging kasalanan niyan ikaw ang unang unang dapat tumulong sa'kanya. They abandoned her, she's no place to be. No money, no nothing. Muntik na kamo mabaliw. And weak people can easily be manipulated. Lumapit siya sa pinsan niya, Winona daw ang pangalan. There are people who aren't willing to help without getting anything in return, ganoon ang Winona na 'yon."

My frown deepened at the mention of the name. I have loved Winona Ryder and grew up admiring her, Little Women is one of my favorites for lifetime. But right now, I'm hating the name Winona each second ticks.

"Hindi ko alam ano trip nung Winona, inutusan siya na guluhin si Oxygen. Ang sabi, first love daw nun si Oxygen at hindi matanggap na hindi naman siya ang first love ng anak ko. Hay naku! Tignan mo epekto ng mga soap opera sa mga tao, ang kokorni." Muling pumaikot ang kaniyang mga mat. "Wala ka ng dapat na ipag-alala, alam ko ang nararamdaman mo, Kung sakali man na nagyari sa'min ni Exodus 'yan noon, baka mabaril ko pa. Pero buntis ka, kaya ako na trumabaho."

Suddenly, I'm terrified. What does she mean 'trumabaho'? And Moana Marie is really good at reading minds because I didn't have to voice it out to hear her answer.

"Wag kang judgmental, Gabbana. Relax ka lang, buhay si Cassandra. Actually, buhay donya pa nga siya ngayon." Mas lumawak ang ngisi niya bago isubo ang pie na nasa tinidor na hawak.

I forgot about the peanut butter, what she's saying caught more of my attention. "What do you mean?"

"Anak ni Senator Ramos ang nakabuntis sa kanya, swerte ng lalaking iyon kasi pinalampas ko siya. Mainit dugo ko sa mga fuck boy, e. Yung mga pa-yummy na walang paninindigan? Kingina ng mga 'yan, e. Nagpapasikip sa Pilipinas. Bakit kaya hindi na lang pagpipigil ng hininga ang maging hobby kaysa pambababae?" Umingos siya. "Yun nga, itong si Senator Ramos medyo tropa ng kapatid ko, ni Blaster. Naawa naman ako, mabait naman yung tao hindi niya deserve mawalan ng anak kahit dapat lang puksain 'yung mga ganoong klase ng tao. Kaya 'yon, sa kanya ko sinabi ang tungkol kay Cassandra, they provided all her needs, shelter, security, food. Safe na siya ngayon. Yung Winona naman, hulaan mo kung anong ginawa ko?"

Naaliw ako sa itsura ni Tita Moana, para siyang bata na enjoy na enjoy sa ginagawa niyang pag-k-kwento.  Natawa tuloy ako. "I have no idea. What?"

"Kinurot ko sa singit." Humagikgik siya, lalo akong natawa.

"Seriously? I mean, how?" Natatawa ko pa ring tanong.

"Makiri siya, e." She said. "Nabbwisit ako sa pa-teleserye niya sa buhay namin. Mabait pa nga ako sa lagay na 'yan, konting kurot won't hurt. Sabi ko sa kanya, mag-ala Mara Clara pa siya ng mga pagpapasabog niyang kakontrabidahan, yung kabila naman kukurutin ko."

Oh God! I can't believe it. Oxygen's mom is just as impossible as him!

I'm glad I get to talk to her, should I thank the peanut butter pie?