‧₊˚✧ ⁝ 𝑪10 ❪ 忘却 ❫ ‧₊˚✧
the final 𝒃𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉 ...
THE BREEZE WAS cold as it grazed over Ria's exposed skin.
A steadfast glow emitted from the bonfire and illuminated everything around her in an amber lustre. Ria hugged her knees, intertwining her fingers together and letting out a steady breath. A joyous chorus of voices and laughs filled the atmosphere, almost like a backdrop of sound against her attention. She was mildly fascinated by the stars this night; the sky was inky black and clearer than the girl had ever seen it before. It looked as if a handful of iridescent pearls had been tossed into the boundless twilight, shimmering in divine flickers.
It was the welcoming bonfire for the new Greenie, but Ria had grown tired after a couple of hours of socialisation. The thought of crawling beneath her warm blankets and sleeping off the bewildering day was vastly appealing. Her mind flipped back to the new boy himself. Earlier, he'd fought Gally in the Builder's ridiculing wrestling match only to end up on the floor once again. There was something different about him, Ria could sense the curiosity practically radiating off him whenever his vigilant gaze examined his surroundings.
Chuck, Jem and a few other Gladers had conversed with her as they had eaten a hearty meal of beef kebabs and salad, but they seemed more interested in the events of the celebration and the Greenie than sitting in a thoughtful silence. Strangely, Ria didn't mind being by herself in front of the flames like she'd done on her own bonfire. It gave her precious time to think, to try and sort out the scattered thoughts within her mind.
"Hey," a voice offered from above, pulling Ria back to the present.
She looked up doubtfully and her eyes met the inquisitive ones of the Greenie. Ria's lips tugged upwards at the corners, drawing her expression into a soft smile at the restless looking boy.
"Hey, um—" Ria began expectantly, hoping for a name to put to his features.
The boy cleared his throat. "Thomas." he replied. "Can I sit?"
"Thomas," Ria repeated quietly, the name rolling effortlessly her tongue like honey. Why did it come so natural? "'Course."
He sat down, leaving a small space between their bodies. Then, he blew his hot breath into his cupped hands in an attempt to warm them up.
"It's a cold night. It's not normally like this in the Glade." Ria began, eyes fixated on the fire which blazed with a comforting heat. Thomas kicked at the dry earth beneath him before turning his attention to the girl beside him.
"Yeah, it is." he paused. "Whatever this place is."
A hoarse strain laced his voice, most likely caused by the desperation of the Box. Ria's memory flashed back to the lift: the way she was struggling for oxygen, the way she kicked and screamed. Hastily, she shook the disturbing thoughts out of her head and she replied to Thomas.
"You'll get used to it, trust me."
He gave her a look, as if he wasn't convinced in the slightest by her words. She couldn't blame him when she'd been exactly the same herself not too long ago.
"So, what's your name?" he asked, tilting his head to face her.
"Ria," she responded, taking in the boy's physical features under the dim lighting of the bonfire.
From under dampened chestnut hair shone his bright hazel eyes, wild with interest as he gazed into her's. He had an olive toned complexion that dusted bronze as it caught the soft hues from the firelight. Ria noticed a few moles were scattered on his face, which was overcast in both exhaustion and scepticism. The boy looked around the same age as her and she couldn't shake the empty familiarity of his appearance.
"Ria ... I thought Newt'd mentioned your name earlier. How come you're the only girl?" Thomas mused.
She scoffed lightly. "You think I have a clue?"
"So you can't remember anything?" he persisted.
Ria let out a low sigh. "Barely anything. I only arrived here about a week or two ago. Apparently a new Greenie comes up every month, so I guess it's strange that you and I came up so close together. It's like we've broken this place's perfect algorithm."
At this, Thomas' eyes widened in wonder. His head dropped as he silently mulled over her explanation.
"You and me? What if ..." he cut himself off and Ria could sense the endless possibilities running through his mind like they were in her's. There must be some sort of explanation for these events, or it could just be the Creators (as Chuck had called them) changing the schedule for their own reasons.
A lengthy silence stretched on between the pair but after a few minutes, Thomas spoke again. This time, he sounded assured in a way that surprised Ria. "The Maze, is it the only way out of this place?"
She turned to him swiftly, her brows knitted together. He'd been here for less than a day yet he seemed so confident in his assumptions towards the Maze. She turned to the walls. The stone barricades glowered back at her from their dominating height, emitting superiority in a way that made Ria shrink in insignificance.
"Yeah. That's our only chance of escape." Ria felt disheartened, like saying the actual words out loud seemed to drain all hope from her body as they lingered in the open. Thomas didn't say anything but nodded thoughtfully, casting a mistrustful gaze in the direction of the Maze.
"Do you remember anything?" Ria asked quietly. "Anything at all?"
Thomas sat in silence for a few seconds, his face screwed up in concentration. "I try to remember but there's nothing. Just this ... emptiness. It's like there's things trying to get through but there's something blocking my memories. Thomas. That's all I know. Other than that, I'm nothing." he sighed, fists clenched in what seemed like internal frustration.
Ria frowned. "Don't worry, it's completely normal. Probably the most frustrating thing those Creators could've done to us, now I think about it."
"Man, if I could remember something, even if it's just just one thing ... it would be so much better than this."
A subdued laugh escaped Ria's lips. "You can say that again,"
She hadn't noticed that most of the noise of the celebration had dwindled, leaving only a few scattered conversations between the remaining Gladers that stayed near the withering embers of the fire. Newt stood with Alby a short distance away, caught up in a laidback discussion of topics unbeknownst to the girl. Every now and then he would steal quick glances at Ria and Thomas from across the fire, an unreadable expression on his face.
Ria noticed Thomas stifle a yawn, his eyelids heavy with fatigue.
"You must be even more exhausted than I am." she shrugged. "Party's died down anyway, how about we get some sleep and talk about strange world of ours another time?" Ria suggested, slowly rising to her feet.
"Sounds good," Thomas smiled for the first time Ria had seen and she noticed the dimples that indented his cheeks. To herself, Ria decided that she liked this new boy. He was similar to her in a way that she couldn't decipher. "G'night, Ria."
"Night, Thomas."
He stood and began to amble over to Homestead, still peering dubiously at his surroundings. Ria noticed Chuck hurry to accompany him and a sentiment of fondness sparked deep within her heart. He was far too kind for the world he was thrown in. She trod her way carefully around the bonfire after climbing to her feet, boots crunching as they made contact with the sheets of ash that scattered the ground.
Newt and Alby were still deep in conversation and Ria noticed the leader crack a rare smile.
"You al'ight Ria?" Alby nodded at the girl, welcoming her into the conversation.
Ria nodded. "Yeah, actually. Been talking to the newbie. Seems nice."
Newt rolled his eyes subtly. "Hello to you too, Gr—"
"You can't call me that anymore," she cut him off, a slow grin spreading across her face.
Taken aback, Newt glanced at her sideways in contemplation. The amber light from the bonfire reflected in his eyes, causing them to flicker from shade to shade in a spectrum of mahogany.
"Fine ... hello to you too Ria." he huffed, a smirk dancing on his lips.
"Why thank you," Ria smiled smugly. She pulled her arms across her chest as the cold winds intensified.
Alby let out a low chuckle, shaking his head. "You two are somethin' else. Come on, you pair of crazies, it's late and cold. 'Bout time we finished up for the night. As aways, it's another glorious long day t'morrow."
Ria pushed her hair behind her ears and began to tread after Alby, Newt walking beside her. The instant Ria's head hit her pillow after she collapsed into the swathe of her warm blankets, she was pulled into the tenebrous void of sleep. But, this time, it came partnered with another elaborate dream.
"I'll come find you, no matter what."
She feels herself being pulled into a hug, sorrowful as she clings onto the older girl who then draws away to hold her at arms length. Her green eyes sparkle with tears but a smile that resembles pride and affection settles upon her lips.
"What you did was really brave. Braver than anything I could ever do," the older girl continues. She reaches out and wipes her tears, touch familiar in a such a heart-warming way.
The younger frowns, unable to find the right words. She's losing the girl she cares about the most and it terrifies her. She flings herself back into her arms, not caring about the brunette locks tickling her cheek. "Promise me you'll find me,"
"Of course I promise. I love you so much."
"I love you too,"
In the moment, she makes her own promise to herself to never forget that.
━━━━━
Ria was sat at a picnic bench under the weeping head of a willow tree, forcing herself to spear a forkful of pasta salad. Thomas was seated opposite her with Chuck beside him, who was enthusiastically retelling a story about some prank he played on another Glader. Thomas went along with this politely, laughing at all the right moments. Ria was trying to listen, her face rested on her hands as she swallowed her mouthful of food. She wasn't hungry.
It was delightfully hot, a familiar contrast to the cool temperature that had dawned upon the Glade the night before. Ria rolled up the long sleeves of her white cotton shirt up to her elbows, noticing the way her skin seemed to simmer in warmth under the ignition of the sun's rays. However she still felt drained, heavy weariness weighing down her eyelids and painting shadows underneath her eyes. She hated the flashbacks that she'd have to endure under the eerily lucid phases during sleep. They filled her head with too many thoughts all at once, then disappeared like a breath extinguishing a flame. Just like a switch, light on one side and opposing darkness on the other.
"What's up?" Chuck asked, flicking her gently on her hand. Ria looked up at him.
"Sorry, just exhausted. Gardening's a lot harder than I first thought," she sighed, forcing a careless smile.
"Gardening?" Chuck giggled, mouthful of pasta. "Mustn't be fun under the heat."
"Couldn't have put it better myself,"
Thomas leant forwards after a second of hesitation. "Do you want the rest of your salad?" he asked, eyeing the untouched food on her plate. Ria imagined just how hungry her must be and she shook her head.
"Nope, go ahead." She pushed her plate across to the boy who thanked her with a small smile. She watched as he tucked into the pasta salad hungrily, not looking up as he shovelled loaded forkfuls into his mouth.
A tap against her shoulder startled Ria all of a sudden. Looking up, her stomach seemed to plummet once she registered who it was. Jem had his arms crossed against his chest, lips pulled into a tight frown. Dark circles painted beneath his eyes and his hair was noticeably tangled, as if he had tossed and turned a lot during the night. He looked a lot paler than usual, skin almost an ashen shade.
Ria swallowed, awaiting his reasoning.
"A package came up for you," he muttered, steel blue eyes fixated on her with an odd intensity. "Alby wanted me to accompany you to collect it from the Box."
She didn't trust him. Every instinct in her body screamed for her to stay seated but once she lifted her gaze back to his, Jem cocked his head in the direction of the Box blankly. Ria tried to ignore her conscious. You're only going to collect something. You'll be fine, she assured herself hastily, standing with as much nonchalance as the girl could muster.
"Okay," she nodded stiffly. "I'll be right back."
Thomas offered Ria a confused look which she ignored, forcing herself to follow Jem towards the Box. The walk was silent and she couldn't decipher the unreadable expression that had settled upon Jem's features. No further words were exchanged and she kept her distance, leaving a few paces between them until he stopped a few metres from the Box. Ria paused.
"Aren't you ... gonna get it?" she asked, peering at the parted shutters.
Jem rolled his eyes, a snarl twitching at the corner of his lips. "It's not mine, is it? Alby wanted me to accompany you, not get the thing."
"Why would Alby even ask—"
"Just slim it and hurry up!" he growled, throwing an exasperated hand in the direction of the Box. Ria flinched at his tone, skin burning under his heavy glare. Just get the package and leave. A tense silence followed as she tentatively sidestepped past him until her feet were met with the edge of the lift. Once she peered into the opening, she realised there was something wrong. Something very wrong.
There was nothing in the Box.
Ria whipped around. "There's n—"
Too late. She felt a hand shove her backwards and the horror of recognition tore through her body as she fell: it had been a trap. The air was stolen from her lungs as she landed with an agonising thud at the bottom of the Box. She grit her teeth, pushing against the floor as she rolled onto her front just as Jem jumped down next to her. The floor shuddered at the added weight, swaying inadvertently. A dangerous glimmer darkened the boy's stormy eyes, pupils dilated into an empty obsidian void. He grabbed her mercilessly before she could stumble to her feet, slamming her back onto the cold metal.
Pain seized her body as she felt his cold hands snake around her exposed throat. There was nothing forgiving about his actions. However, before he could begin to squeeze, a flare of adrenaline sparked inside of Ria and she drove her knee into his stomach as hard as she could. A rasping choke escaped Jem's lips and he staggered to the floor. She took the opportunity to scramble away, panic and trepidation seething through her bloodstream. Ria needed to get out now. He's crazy, he's crazy, he's crazy.
"Help me!"
The sheer impact of him pouncing at her and the crash of their bodies back downwards ripped the scream from her lungs. Jem was on top of her, his legs crushing her's as he forced her body still. This time, he didn't hesitate before coiling his fingers around her neck and started squeezing. Stunned, Ria thrashed and writhed underneath him.
"You're finally getting what you deserve," he spat, a haunting vacancy of expression on his face. His lips were curled into a leer as he watched her struggle with a callous fulfilment. Ria clawed at his fingers desperately, trying to pry his iron grip away. He was too strong. She felt her chest tighten, a horrifying burning sensation twisting within her as he continued. "You were the one that did it, not me! They sent me here with you to die and it's all your fault! You're a murderer!"
She dug her nails into his wrists and he pressed tighter in wrathful retaliation. Head spinning, Ria tried perilously to gasp for oxygen. Nothing. The corners of her vision began to eclipse into darkness as her arms fell limp against her side.
"I've been waiting so long for you, Ria. They didn't have it within them to punish you properly. All they did was switch you and sacrifice me too. Well, guess what you cold-hearted bitch? I'll do the dirty work for them..."
Ria believed she was going to die. Her mind grew hazy, Jem's words slipping into snarling whispers. She closed her eyes, allowing the torment to ignite every inch of her frozen body. It's all your fault...
"GET OFF HER!"
In the depths of the empty darkness she had began her descent into, Ria heard the hollow slam of an object against a skull. Then, she felt her torso convulse for oxygen as the pressure on her throat was released. She coughed bitterly and her eyes stung with hot tears as she felt someone wrap their arms around her, pulling her into a seating position. A million voices thickened the atmosphere but she couldn't focus on any one of them.
Ria was alive, but something inside of her seemed to have perished.
━━━━━
"What happened?"
Thomas was sat beside Ria on a fallen log in the Deadheads. Four hours had passed since the incident and she could feel the weight of every second as it dragged by. Formed in a defensive cluster, a thick mass of grey clouds veiled the sunlight from scattering the Glade in heat.
Ria took a deep breath, wrapping her trembling arms around her knees. She'd refused to stay in the Med-jack hut, only compromising a quick check up from Clint. She could still feel Jem's cold hands around her throat whenever she tilted her head, shards of agony splintering across her chest at the movement.
"Like I told you guys earlier, he just attacked me. One minute I was looking into the Box and the next he was on top of me, strangling me and saying all these things."
"Things?" Thomas pressed, hazel eyes seeing past the pain inflicted in her's and into the depths of her sorrow.
She shook her head, swallowing before formulating a reply. "He said ... he said it was my fault he was put into the Glade. He made it seem as if I'd done something awful and him killing me was my punishment. I ... I just can't describe the way he looked at me, like he hated every single part of my soul."
Thomas was silent for a second, brows furrowed in a contemplated uncertainty. Ria watched his face intently, desperate for anything for him to say that'll ease her mind. Her heart was still racing, slamming against her ribcage like a tempest encaged within her bones. The guilt and fear of the unknown hollowed her out from the inside, digging a grave of misery.
"God, I'm sorry, Ria. I really am. I should gone with you to the Box, or Chuck. He's clearly sick or something if he said all those things, surely he can't remember the things that happened before this place?"
"Yeah, I guess you're right." Ria replied, though she couldn't bring herself to agree in the slightest. Nobody, ill or sane, says those awful things with such violent conviction without reason. Jem knew something that she didn't. "And don't be sorry, Thomas. How could you have known?"
Thomas licked his lips, casting his gaze to the floor. "Well, what do you think they're doing with him now? I mean, Alby told us to stay out here until comes to get us."
Ria imagined a thousand different possible punishments that Alby could inflict on Jem. The second rule burned at the front of her mind: never hurt another Glader. The boy had gone far beyond that, coiling death around her throat with such a cruel ease. She shuddered, tightening her embrace around herself.
"I don't know. I guess we'll have to wait and see, no matter how horrible."
And so they did. When Alby finally came to retrieve them half an hour later, his face was stone cold with grief. He didn't speak much, only instructing the pair to follow him from the Deadheads and back into the Glade. Thomas shared a confused look with Ria once the leader told him to make his way to Homestead without her. She watched mournfully as his retreating figure disappeared into the light of the wooden building and she suddenly felt awfully alone.
"Ria. Listen 'ere and listen close." Alby's stern voice puller her back to the present, lines of stress indenting his coffee brown skin. His lips were pulled into a tight, unwavering frown. Ria nodded, forcing herself to stay composed.
"What Jem did was unforgivable. He not only harmed, but he tried to kill ya. We have no room for that kind of savagery 'ere. No room whatsoever. He broke our second rule and we can't have people thinkin' that kind of behaviour is okay, you get me?"
"What did you do to him?" Ria demanded, ignoring the tremor lacing her words.
A low sigh came from Alby as he weighed the outcomes of telling the truth or a lie. He decided on the former. "I won't sugarcoat it for ya. You won't be seein' anymore of that loony, 'kay?"
Her hands shook at her side. Could she have sent him to his grave? "What does that mean?"
Alby didn't answer, his frown deepening. "Get some sleep. You've had a nightmarish day."
"No, Alby! Wait, just tell me. Please." she watched painfully as he turned from her and began to walk away. Ria couldn't bring herself to follow him. She was paralysed like ice, whole body frozen in culpability. She wanted to tear apart the girl she once was, the one that had damaged Jem and caused him such trauma. The one that was plagued with harrowing sin and wrongdoing. The one who shaped the broken stranger she was now.
Murderer. She was a murderer.
‧₊˚✧ ⁝ 𝒎𝒂𝒚𝒂'𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆 ❪ 忘却 ❫
oo. i apologise for the long chapter but i hope i did it justice!! u probably weren't expecting that little twist w/ ria and jem. i cant wait for you guys to uncover the reasoning behind his actions as the series progresses. as this book nears the end of act one, i want to take the time to thank you all for reading/voting/commenting. it means sm to me, ily!! what were your thoughts on this chapter? any theories? i'd rly love to know!! ͈♡⃛˚₊✩‧₊
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