Anxiety and fear will always end up bleeding insanity.

It is said that anxiety is a thin stream of fear, trickling through the space in your mind. If encouraged, it then proceeds to cut a channel into which all other thoughts are then starting to be drained.

Anxiety and fear bleed insanity.

Anxiety.

A deep horn sound, slightly muffled, filled the heavy air, and soon everyone had steadily gathered in the main square of the Nest.

Robust and dry wood branches of different shapes and sizes, were placed in a pyramid shape. Carefully structured together, they formed the fire which was built right in the center of all of all that. It burned in bright, strong flames, and some of the children gathered forming a half ring around it. The flames blazed harshly amidst the afternoon dry air, sparks and vibrant motes waltzed in the air and raised to the sky.

I could feel the inferno against my skin, as if ready to swallow me whole.

Half-naked young women, all dressed up in similar attire made of alder leaves, danced around the fire. Their tails, suggestive and lively, wagged in the air as they moved in a synchronized manner. They shifted back and forth from me, and then they circled around, only to return in to the same position where they started off from. Their claws dug into the scorched earth as they swayed on the lively rhythm that came from the instruments which the younger men played skillfully.

Kore, the lad that bumped into me with his friends earlier that day, was skillfully and effortlessly carrying the main melody of the dance on a wooden pan flute ornate with red paint. He twitched his ears enthusiastically as he stomped his feet on the rhythm.

Not much further away, on the other side, facing me, stood Crassus. A few of the elderly women, which looked to be around their golden years, and the youngest children were gathered around him. They joked and fussed around the man, and the pups were tugging on his tail and onto his clothes, much to everyone's amusement.

He had a constant striking confident smile on his face, which made him stand out from everyone else. His features well defined, slightly on the rougher side, but not overshadowing his proportions, complimented his gaze which never wavered. Broad shoulders towered over all others present, and it seemed like there wasn't a single person there, beast or any other being, that could deny that they were all drawn to him. He had that aura which made one find him fascinatingly irresistible, like a forbidden fruit.

His eyes met mine, and he raised an eyebrow at me as he paused his chatting for a brief moment, but soon after he broke eye contact.

I exhaled sharply and turned away from him. I couldn't be bothered. Amidst all this, there was one person that was missing was — Rexsus.

If it previously seemed like he was merely silently tolerating my presence up until that so called incident in the forest, it was now more than clear that, during the past few days he had been doing everything he could to purposefully avoid me.

Not that I cared.

I didn't.

Not one bit.

But I could not help but find myself pondering on the matter.

My mind drifted to him often. Wondering where he was. I unconsciously found myself looking for him in the crowds. My ears focused, eager and excited, whenever I heard his voice, and I couldn't help but give in.

Carl Jung claimed that until you make the unconscious things conscious, they will direct your mind, and you will call what becomes of you fate.

Fate.

I didn't believe in it. And so, maybe that is why fate became cruel.

By the time the dancing ceremony ended, people gathered all around me.

For a lack of a better explanation, this had become unusual, as up until that point it had been established, as an unspoken and unbreakable rule, that nobody in the pack shall be allowed to come in contact with me as they pleased.

Curious eyes looked at me, and I felt like a miserable bug under the microscope.

A small toddler with frizzy blonde hair, almost bigger than herself, shily made their way through the crowd, approaching me with an eagerness I hadn't seen in anyone ever.

As I looked down at her, in her small and frail hands, she held a braided flower crown which she embraced tightly close to her chest.

"I am called Rai," she said, her fragile voice cracking as she spoke, "I wasn't sure what we were supposed to bring." She paused, swallowing nervously. "But I know we are supposed to bring something of great value to us. And I think flowers are so beautiful...a-and," she stuttered as she raised her gaze to look up at me, "and s-so, I brought you this crown I made."

Her dark doe eyes, framed by arched, thin lashes, looked up at me, as if the fate of the entire planet laid within the words I was about to utter back in response to her offering.

I turned around to look at Annia, and she reassuringly placed her hand on my shoulder. I then knew what she wanted me to do.

"Well then, little Rai, would you like to put this on for me?" I said, slightly bowing my head in her direction.

The child's cheeks flushed cherry-red.

She nodded quickly, and the crowd fell silent as she inched forward in my direction. She extended her tiny arms towards me, and with trembling in her hands, she clumsily placed the crown on my head, letting out a sharp breath of relief when done.

"May it prosper!" shouted Rexsus, coming forward from the back of the crowd, and he proceeded to pick up the small girl in his arms.

"May it prosper!" chanted everyone, suddenly filled with jolliness.

It frightened me. The thought of what was about to happen. I knew for a fact that by the end of the day, all of them would be utterly disappointed when they would find out nothing would come out of all this.

I was sure nothing would happen. I knew it wouldn't.

But I was not going to insist on ruining their hope now. What would happen of me then?

In the following moments, I received all kinds of gifts and offerings.

Grains and meat. Crafted jewelry. Drinks and spices. Acts of service, greetings, and wishes. All which I knew I would not be capable to ever fulfil.

As the three suns seemed to reach the auspicious position, I knew that the offering ceremony would soon come to an end. I would finally be able to walk for the first time that day.

My feet were aching, and I my skin felt itchy from the heat and the small droplets of sweat that started to form under the constrains of my garments. The leaves of my attire stuck to me like leaches ready to feast on their prey.

When I was about to make my way off the throne, Rexsus approached me with a jug in his hands. His head bowed down before me, and I heard him speak to me directly for the first time since I was summoned there that one night.

"I am told I don't possess the qualities worthy of companionship," he said pouring water from the jar onto my feet. "And I know the consequences that may arise with the slightest rebellion on my part."

His big callused hands caringly brushed away the water.

"I must let you know that both I and everyone else in the pack will do everything in our possibility to keep you safe."

I felt my skin tingle under his rough touch, and I couldn't bring myself to hold back an uncontrollable giggle, which made him look up at me, his calm gaze pinned onto mine.

"I want you to be happy here," he confessed, and I thought I saw him smile for a fleeting moment. "I truly do want that for you."

Despite what he said, and despite the fact that I wanted to believe every word that came out of his mouth, I knew I couldn't ever be happy there. Sooner or later; they would turn on me, as they would realize what a mistake they made.

What was to become of me then?

"May it prosper," he whispered, pouring the rest of the water onto my feet.

The water trickled onto the parched ground, the earth hungrily swallowing it, the frail bugs swarming towards it, crawling in a desperate manner at the few drops that managed to linger on the surface.

I looked at them as they struggled and squirmed against one another. And my stomach twisted in pain.

I pressed my bare foot over their fragile being, their remains lingering on the sole of my foot.

I was one of those bugs. I could have been mangled at any given moment.