Song for the chapter: Show You Off- Dan + Shay.

Unedited chapter, I am too sleepy right now. Lol.

ASHTON

She really is a runner! OH, MY GOD. And not to forget a really hot one.

Does she even know how breathtaking she is?

It took around twenty minutes to reach Ala Wai River; it was a soothing place but not the reason why I took her there; running has helped me in so many ways. It not only boosted my mood but it had assuaged me from my melancholy. Exercise made me feel lighter. I would always go there alone, wondering about mom, about Emily, about the perfect life we had back then, believing I took my life for granted; sharp pain would shoot from my entire body, making my spirits hit the ground, but the mixture of anger and worries always became numb for a while. My spirits would rise higher than ever and the motivation to proceed with life would increase with each step.

They say sleep is a temporary fix. If only they would run a mile.

When I told her I would be driving, she freaked out for a minute, raised her bossy eyebrows, analyzed my words in her usual Jane-like manner and asked, "I thought we were going for a run, Ashton. Are you crazy or something?" My name swirling beautifully from her perfect, little warm mouth.

Yes, crazy! Crazy about you. The torture of controlling myself from around you is driving me insane even though the whole color scheme is too distracting. But I don't care as long as I get to see those legs.

I have been obsessed with her toned legs ever since I saw her in the elevator. That is the first thing I noticed about her; there is a reason why they are so special to me. I nodded and cleared my head, wondering she would creep the hell out if she ever heard my thoughts.

I was shamelessly staring at her; I just can't get enough of the adorable faces she keeps making with her puffy cheeks. And she is totally doing it again..I am dreaming about pulling those heavenly cheeks...Talk about torture.

"You know you smile too much and it creeps me out. Oh, and I am totally judging myself for spending time with you." She smirked innocently, waiting for me to respond, her eyebrows still raised up. I laughed, unaware of the smile on my face. You make me smile, Hope. I wished she believed me, I wished she felt the way I did. She was so mesmerizing even without trying. Everything about her was pure, so effortless. She did have a heart, somewhere deep inside and I could see it through the big blue gems shining under the Hawaiian sun. I ran my eyes on her face, she was not wearing any makeup and her hair was tied in a high pony, stretching her face from the corners.

I told her I would be taking her to a proper running route near the beach. This girl really hasn't seen the beauty of Hawaii. Though, she is the most beautiful thing here right now.

"I have kept extra water bottles for us, they don't have many water fountains there. Didn't want you to get dehydrated," I assured and she nodded at me, her face pressed in a straight line. I felt too good taking care of her. I wanted to protect her from everything bad and that too without making her feel like she had to get free from me to breathe deeply. No, I would not suffocate her, that is one reason why I did not throw my hands around her and gripped her closer to me in the lobby. She surprised me, it might be only for a second or two but it was enough to make my heart hammer out of my chest. I wanted more but when I saw the hesitation on her face as if she regretted her move, I couldn't do it.

Throughout the car ride, Hope's sight was outside the window. Something was different about me ever since I woke up today, I was feeling both relaxed yet nervous at the same time; she was captivating my mind entirely, she was becoming like a drug to me. Her blonde hair flowing out of the car, reminding me of the familiar scent. I inhaled deeply, embedding her odour. She smelled too sweet and too fresh and yes, it was too addictive. If I would spend any more time with this girl, I would become crazier than I already was. I thought about Jane all day, all night, trying to search for what was buried inside her precious self and how it would feel to be immersed inside her. I kept stealing glances at her, wishing she would look at me but she never did. Her smell was the only thing which made me feel as if she was still with me, otherwise, she didn't even utter a word. Not even once. Her hand was resting on her thigh, I pulled it and interlocked my fingers between her's, reminding her that I meant what I said to her earlier today. Jane did not flinch but she also didn't turn around to look at me. My hands were shivering against her soft skin and I wondered if she was able to feel the vibration in my palm.

I badly wanted to pull her closer to me and brush my lips against those plump kissable lips but I couldn't. I removed my hand from her's and grabbed the steering wheel tightly, stopping myself from losing control. I wanted to close my eyes and swirl my tongue in her mouth, tasting the sweetness she had besides the sorrows, sucking away her pain and at the same time, easing mine too. Then again, I couldn't. At least, not right now. I wanted to learn the way she tasted. I wanted to worship her for being so surreal. I wanted to shake her and ask her why she was so different than anybody I had ever seen. I couldn't make a move until I was sure she wanted me to.

I had wrapped my arms around her, and that too more than twice, felt her warmth and kissed those pretty, glacéd cheeks but I was scared to do those things all over again, too afraid that once she would know how I felt, she would never look back. It was weird how I had the power to do all those things until yesterday but I felt weak when it came to doing it again.

I told her I would not question about her past and I would be there for her. Maybe that was one reason for it all. I really needed to man up, I felt weak. I assured her I would not enquire about her life; it was the biggest lie I had ever told anyone. I needed to get close to her, way too close. Enough closer to easily make her pour everything out. What broke her to point that she stood up tougher than ever, blocking everything? Will that question always remain a mystery to me or I will be able to solve it? Please don't block me, Jane. I had to spill those things out to make her feel comfortable because the moment she turned away, my heart stopped beating and I felt pain. Fucking pain. I thought I had lost her again, I felt hopeless and defeated. You don't feel pain at that level unless there are more emotions and feelings attached to it. Anger boiled inside my blood along with a rush of overwhelming feelings but when I poured my heart out to her, she fucking believed me and that was the best thing that had ever happened to me. Jane did not doubt me. It was a win-win situation. I would have begged till she trusted me; never giving up on Hope.

Her walls were up so high, she guarded herself with so much strength that even when I felt a hint of comfort in her voice, she would prove me wrong and drift away. I had no idea how much power I would have to use in order to break the walls without breaking her entirely. I had to be careful, no matter how fiercely solid she was, I would hate to see her become fragile and crumble down. I would never forgive myself if I ever let her down. That would be another added burden to my messed up life.

She always came at a time when I needed to let out my burdens. Maybe it was a sign from God? I loved that she was not easy and today, I was fully aware that I had fallen deeply for her. Fallen too hard for Jane Mayor. My only Hope. It was more than just some immature infatuation, I was too close to falling in love. I sounded like a lovesick freak to myself but I was not embarrassed by it. It was the best thing ever. The more she showed me her darkness, the more I witnessed different colors bursting out of her. It was euphoric, I needed no drugs.

Please, don't run away, Hope.

I sighed as I parked outside the jogging ground. Jane's eyes grew wider as she looked around, her eyes studying the entire setting.

"Wow, this is beautifully landscaped," she said as she thrust out her chest. "I know," I replied, my eyes fixated on her. She looked relaxed which made me the happiest man alive.

Tall buildings were standing on the opposite of waterway and paddlers were showing their canoeing skills as they swiftly moved around the artificial river canal while a few sweaty runners paced along the sidewalk. The rush hours were usually around 6:30 A.M to 9:00 AM and luckily it was 10:15 A.M. It was quieter and more private with an aesthetic view and delightful daylight as a plus point. Ever since I saw Jane at the hospital, trying to make less contact with people, I knew she would not want to be in a crowded area.

And guess what? After we stretched, she ran freaking 4 miles.

4 miles......what the actual fuck? And I thought I was an athlete?

I was amazed to see she hadn't passed out yet because the scorching heat might take away the little bit of life left inside me. And I think I had already lost my breath catching Jane.

It was freaking hot today, I checked the temperature on my phone.  90 °F ?

"Feeling blue, eh?" I teased, taking deep breaths and brushing her shoulder with mine. When I finally landed on the green grass under the shade, Jane was still standing, her cheeks flushed as the sun left its' trail. The heat radiating from our bodies. She was definitely getting a tan soon enough.

"Here, drink it," I ordered, handing her the small mineral water bottle.

"Thanks," she mumbled. I kept noticing the tiny little droplets of sweat, falling from her forehead, kissing her neck, taking a whole route from the inside of her her sports bra and finally evaporating on her stomach, making it shinier. Lucky bastards.

"Shutup, that is all I packed. Didn't think I would be running under this heat." She said nervously as she saw my eyes stuck on her body. Was she nervous because I teased her about her clothes? No, no, no. I hated that. What is wrong with me?

"You are crazy for even bringing me here. You do this every day?" She asked, bending down absently, resting her palms on her knees.

"Every single day but not this much. Two miles max. Honestly, I didn't think it would be this hot. But seriously, I am shocked; you ran too much. I underestimated you." I really did underestimate her. I thought she would be able to feel fresh if she ran rather than shutting herself inside the hotel room but she had already figured the technique out. I wondered if it worked for her.

"Well, I can be unpredictable sometimes," she flipped her damp hair, relaxed on the warm grass and crossed her legs.

"Sometimes? Hah, sure," I rolled my eyes. It all happened too quick and I couldn't even stop myself from saying so. I smiled to remove the awkwardness. She was a riddle I couldn't decode.

"Okay, but I am seriously impressed," I added, interlocking my fingers over my knees and resting my chin on it.

"Underestimate me again, I challenge you. Remember that I will always prove you wrong. And what was that? You are rolling your eyes at me. How dare you?" She fluttered her long eyelashes, shifting on the ground below.

"Well, they say you learn a lot from your company," I smirked. She frowned and tapped her feet without realizing it. Her hands were gripping on the grass, pulling them away from their roots.

"Hmm, trust me, you don't want to become like me." Her voice was pained and her eyes seemed broken again; the spark in her was dissolving. It caused me to choke a breath. My happy Jane was switching back to the something different, someone angry. Why would she say that? Everyone is unique in their own way and even though our personalities are not even a bit similar, we both have experienced something painful. She might be caged but there is warmth inside her. I can feel it every time we touch.

"As I said, I would never judge you. Why do you keep forgetting that I call you Hope?" I smiled.Was she still with me? Was she even listening or just lost in her thoughts?

She was slowly sloping back into her thoughts, letting the haunting images of her past get to her. Her expressions dulled and she started nibbling on her lower lip while her eyes were stuck on her sneakers. I hated not being able to hear her thoughts out loud, I felt like Edward Cullen. Okay, that was a really bad example. Really, really bad. Except that, Jane was nothing like Bella. Dammit, I didn't just compare myself with a vampire.

"No, it is just..when I asked you, you made that face as if you were disgusted by the idea of it. It was the same one you made when I saw you the first time and if I am being honest, I really adore that face," I said, changing the topic. I had already lost count of the number of times I had changed topics with her. I had to be careful before I would blow this off.

"Oh, well... I run when I feel like I can't take it anymore. You know? The bulb inside my head fuses and it is like I am being haunted in the dark. And that is when I know I have to bring back the light," she jolted upright, gnashing her teeth. Again the urge to make her talk came rushing back, her eyes turned red from the corners. She was angry, storm building in the deep blue eyes.

"I run when I need to take a break-" Before I could complete my sentence, I realized she was silently rising up from the ground.

"What is wrong?" I asked, confused and worried.

"I talk too much sometimes," she rubbed her eyes, she looked tired too.

"I love when you talk to me. I love when you communicate with me. It feels so damn good. I am your friend remember? Don't ever feel like you can't talk." Ouch! That hurts. We couldn't be friends, not after how I felt about her. The heat was getting to her even though we were sitting under the shade and that is when I decided where I had to take her next. I would take her to the beach and throw her in the water to cool her off because the wires inside her mind needed to become numb, she needed to forget her pain. I could make it all right for Hope.

"Wait-" My eyes directed to her sneakers. "I need to tie these evil things, you don't want them to succeed in plotting your fall, now do you? Gotta save you every time," I smiled, looking up at her as I tied her shoelaces. And that is how I would protect her, no matter how big or small her issues would be. She nodded, she was oddly quiet.

"Let's get out of here," I said as the fear crossed my face. I did not want to spoil anything for us. She really was unpredictable but I was not someone who would give up on the girl who needed saving, especially the one who was driving me insane.

***

Note: LONG CHAPTER cause you guys deserve it and because I wanted to go inside Ashton's mind even more. He might seem a bit different because he is telling you how attracted he is getting to Jane. 😊

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