PROLOGUE:
PARADISE LOST
SET IN:
YEARS BEFORE EPISODE ONE

☢︎︎

NIKO FELT NUMB. Hovering on the side of the street, hands gripping the backpack clumsily thrown over her right shoulder, the world seemed to just stop. Minutes had already passed since she'd walked out the door, but everything still seemed fresh.

That look in his eyes. She thought to herself, subconsciously feeling the remnants of a pain that she'd long buried. It was just like Dad's. A hefty conclusion, given her foster father was not half the polluted man her dad was. However, it was that look they share that caused Niko to nearly ruin everything this foster home has given her.

The eyes were the windows to the soul. One look, and some people could discern the intentions of another just by their eyes. Niko had never thought herself someone who pays attention to detail. After all, she lived most her of her life purposefully blurred. But the one thing Niko always seemed to notice were eyes.

She distinctly remembered her mother's eyes. They were kinder than most; a brilliant blue that nearly shined in direct sunlight. Niko would search for them sometimes after her mother's death, trying desperately to seek the only comfort of home that lingered in the depths of her mind. Used to, she could perfectly picture them in her head. Now, the years apart from her dear mother have muddled her memory.

However, Niko could never seem to shake the image of her father's sullied glare. It had dug its way into her mind; forcefully chained itself along her memories. Her father's eyes weren't a comfort-filled wistful memo, instead they were a noxious, venom-dripping nightmare. His sickly green irises were a reminder of the poison she'd hated, and the poison she'd inherited. Often the simple flash of quick memory could send her spiraling, make her relive all the pain and suffering and grief Niko had barricaded within.

She supposed the glare she'd been subjected to by her foster father had somehow triggered that reaction within her. Niko had long been numbed to yelling. Arguments were natural parts of life, and she had grown up accustomed to constant screaming and bickering. She herself was aversive to expressing such an amount of emotion, as she found it weak to let yourself go that much. But her foster father had no problem with it.

He spend most of his time berating his lovely wife before Niko had come to live with them. He had her dangling on strings like a puppet, decisively pulling at them in just the way to drive her crazy and keep control over her at the same time. Niko saw this start to unravel in real time right before her eyes.

Her foster mother leeched onto her the second she'd arrived, seemingly ecstatic to have another person in the house. She'd connected with Niko so much she'd started slowly ripping the strings from her skin; taking back her freedom and standing up to her husband. Niko didn't quite understand exactly what her foster mother got out of her existence that made her want to take back control, but she was glad nonetheless. Of course, however, her foster father was not.

He saw Niko as a villain in his own life. In his twisted little world view, she was tearing down the carefully constructed act of a home and family he'd been playing at for years. Her simple presence could send him into a violent, but deeply pathetic rage. Niko found his anger weak. He was privileged beyond belief—in her mind he had nothing to hound about. So, obviously, that brought about clashes between the two of them.

Niko kept most of her feelings towards him hidden. She didn't particularly care what he thought of her, neither whether or not he actually wanted her taking up space in his house. Often their altercations were one sided; he yelled at her whilst she just stood there and took it. Niko knew how fragile foster homes were for a rotted girl like her, so she'd long been trained in playing the game. She knew how to numb herself so when things like this happened she could act as if she wasn't phased at all.

Niko had almost cracked this time. He usually said the same few degrading lines, mostly about how she was a worthless foster child who would never end up anywhere but the dump. She'd heard that line before, so it never hurt to hear it some more. However, something different had possessed him today. He had looked her dead in the eyes and insulted her birth mother; calling her names Niko didn't even want to repeat, who had produced a bastard child like her.

No one ever spoke of her mother. The employees who had found her after the incident had asked her once about it, then after receiving a blank stare and a cry of pain because of the blistering wound still engraved on her stomach to this day, they never dared to ask again. There aren't even records of her past other than a badly singed birth certificate that only showed her birthdate and name; the part that was supposed to contain her parents names were gone. So when that hollowed, third of what a man was supposed to be, merely mentioned her mother, Niko nearly snapped.

  The tainted nature of her quirk and the inherent aggression needed to wield it made it all too easy for her to slip into its intoxicating rage; to allow her body to do what it was biologically designed to do: destroy. The hereditary pollution within her screamed against her own skin, made her nearly give in to natural instinct that she despised more than anything. It took an insane amount of effort to pull herself from that place, to force everything natural about herself back into its safe and escape the situation.

  Now, after that rare burst of emotion, Niko was left drained. The harsh rain of the day pounded on her skull and soaked her clothes and hair. Drowned in the deafening sounds around her, she felt nothing but the rain and the residue. At one point, she felt herself close her eyes, as the water was beginning to make them sting.

"Niko? Is that you?" A brash voice rang out from somewhere around her, pulling her drifting conscience back into her body. Her aqua eyes squinted into the darkness of the rain, then widened at finding the source.

Katsuki Bakugo was stood a few feet away from her, completely drenched by the rain. His normally spiky blond hair was engaged in an active battle with the water itself; some parts still clinging to their usual form, others stuck to his head. He looked upon her in confusion and what little concern he seemed capable of expressing.

Niko nearly stumbled back in shock. Katsuki hated the rain. When it rained at school, he always tried to avoid it as much as possible, even going as far as being late to class just because he took a slower route that could guarantee him not a drop. He always tugged her inside even if it barely sprinkled, angrily cursing at the rain and muttering about how much he hated it. And he here was now, standing before her, fully encompassed in it.

"Katsuki? What are you doing out here?"

He'd ran up to her the second she'd started speaking, quickly pulling a half-soaked rain coat out from under his own hastily unzipped one. Katsuki threw it over her shoulders quickly, then stepped back with a large scowl on his face. His crimson eyes were somehow still visible in the fogged air, and for some reason it brought her an ounce of comfort.

"I could ask you the same question! What the hell are you doing out here?" he questioned her angrily, raising an eyebrow. "Why would you want to be out in the damn rain of all places?"

The answer escaped her before she realized what it implied. "It's better than being in there." Her voice was more hoarse than she had expected, causing her to cringe at herself.

Katsuki seemed confused for a moment, brows wound together and eyes searching her face suspiciously, before his face cleared of it all and it transformed into a ripe scorn. She watched as the gears in his mind turned and clicked, and his glare snapped towards the house a few feet away: her foster home. He made a motion as if he was going to move and Niko outstretched a hand to stop him, lightly keeping him from moving.

"Don't," she hissed out, eyes straining from the rain and maybe her own inability to neutralize the emotions bubbling within. Niko hadn't told him for a reason. In fact, she hadn't told anyone what happened in that house on purpose because it would endanger all that she had found here. She couldn't go back to the cycle. She needed to stay here. This was the closest thing to a home she'd found yet. "Stop assuming. It's not what you're thinking."

His judgmental stare told her he was not convinced. "You think I'm stupid? You're shaking, Niks!"

The use of his nickname for her in this moment made her stomach sink. Niko couldn't bare to meet his eyes with her own, so she kept her gaze to the water-beat ground. He can't know. She just couldn't tell him. Maybe she was selfish or stupid for that, but she didn't care. She wanted to keep him in her life, and if she told him she was sure she'd loose everything.

  Niko was not going to let another home get destroyed.

  "Please stop," she asked of him, more weak than she would have ever liked to sound. "Just leave it, 'Suki."

  Katsuki's gaze was fierce. It always had been, but in this moment it was harsher than ever. She could tell all he wanted to do was scream at her in till she told him the truth, but instead he somehow managed to ignore his nature. "Fine. At least come inside with me."

  She shook her head immediately. "I don't want to be inside."

  He huffed. "Then at least get under that damn bench with me. You're gonna catch a stupid cold standing out here, dumbass."

  He nodded towards a sheltered bench a foot away from them, and grabbed her arm and pulled her to it. Niko sat down beside him, holding his coat tight around herself. Now that she was out of the rain, she hadn't realized just how cold it had truly been.

Neither said a word for a long while. The silence felt like a bated breath, though Niko could care less. His presence made her feel grounded. It brought her back into the actual world instead of the suffocating vortex of her own mind.

She didn't really know what to say to him. After all, they were close, and she trusted him more than anyone else. But that kind of innate weakness was not common in their interactions. He knew she had gone through some bad things; he wasn't stupid enough that he couldn't infer that. But he never made her feel obligated to tell him. He was just there, and Niko valued that a lot.

Now, he was still himself. Katsuki could be mean and rude, though around her he seemed to tone it down some. Not out of pity, but of respect. She could match him in nearly everything; the amount of times she had put him in his place was ridiculous. Though, as he hadn't kicked her to the curb yet, he seemed to like that about her.

The quality that stood out the most about him was the fact that he didn't care about her quirk. Most people would become disgusted or scared of her once they knew of her quirk, and that had led her to lead quite the lonely life. However, Katsuki did not care. When she first told him about her quirk, he'd said it was "decent" and moved on to something else. Niko had never been more confused and happy in her entire life.

  But now as she sat beside him, words evaded her. What could she say, really? Anything that suggested she was being mistreated would make him angry, and then he'd tell his mother and Niko would be right back in the foster care system once again. She just couldn't take that risk. This... attachment she had to him was too strong for her to have to abandon.

  So Niko continued to say nothing. A few times she glanced over at him, to find his face quickly snapping away from hers, as if he had been stealing looks at her when she wasn't paying attention. Finally, after a few more times of this secret back and forth between their eyes, Niko willed herself to at least say something.

"I just want you to know that I'm alright," she said hesitantly, her voice quiet.

"You know I don't believe bullshit, right?" he replied roughly, that signature scowl back on his face. "But I won't question you. I can't do shit if you wouldn't let me, and clearly something is stopping you."

  Damn. She thought to herself. Why is he so good at reading people?

  The rain began to slow, turning into light sprinkling as the sun started to poke through the clouds. Niko sighed, looking over at him. "Thanks for being here. I know you hate the rain, so I'm sorry you got all wet."

  He made a "tch" sound in response. "Whatever, you're welcome. I guess."

  Niko found herself cracking a small smile at his attitude. It was the first time she'd smiled all day. Katsuki noticed it as well, as his face twisted up in an even bigger scowl and then he glared at her.

  "What's so funny? Why are you making that dumb face?"

  Niko laughed. "Nothing, 'Suki."

  His brows tightened on his forehead as he watched her laugh. "I hate you."

  "I'm sure you do," she said, sounding unconvinced.

  Katsuki rolled his eyes in response, a little pout forming on his lips and he crossed his arms against his chest. Niko couldn't help but chuckle at that, which led to him getting even more annoyed.

She spent the rest of the afternoon by his side.
Eventually he'd gotten tired of the bench and practically made her come home with him, and they'd watched reruns of old All Might tapes in till his dad had called them for dinner. She'd enjoyed her meal and had a blast talking with Katsuki's mom, who she had always loved to spend time with since she had met her son. Then, after she and Katsuki had played video games for while, his mom told him he had to take her home because they had school tomorrow.

Reluctantly, Katsuki had walked her home. He walked in step with her, beside her rather than what he usually preferred, which was to be in front of her. It was unusual, but Niko found herself liking it. Once they got to her driveway, she had expected him to leave, but instead he walked with her all the way up to door.

"You didn't have to walk all the way up here, Katsuki," she told him, looking up at him in slight confusion.

"Well, I did. Got a problem with it?" he retorted back.

"No, I don't."

"Good."

Silence sat in for a bit, and Niko took it as her queue to go inside. Reaching for the doorknob, she was stopped before her hand even touched the metal. Confused, she spun back around to meet Katsuki's gaze once again.

"What?" she asked, looking over him.

"Stay safe, I guess," he muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets and not meeting her eyes.

Niko's gaze softened. This was his way of showing he cared. Though it was not conventional in the slightest, she found it comforting nonetheless.

  "I will, Katsuki. No need to worry," Niko reassured him.

  He scoffed. "I'm not worried."

  She just shook her head. "Your mom's gonna get mad at you if you take too long, you know."

  "Whatever, Niks. See you tomorrow," he said as he turned around and walked off. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him sparing her a few glances as he walked home. Chuckling softly to herself, she forced herself to turn back to the door.

  Niko felt sick to her stomach as she stared at the door in front of her. It was nighttime now. If things escalated again, she would have no where to go. But it wasn't like she had a choice. Niko had to grin and bear whatever that pathetic man did to her. It was just how things were.

  So she took a deep breath, numbed herself, and opened the door.

☢︎︎

  EVERYTHING SEEMED FUZZY. Her steps made the floorboards creak beneath her, each little sound increasing the building sickness in her stomach. Niko felt gravely disoriented, as if her very soul was begging her not to be there.

  The house was oddly silent. The only sound that could be heard was the damned floors, which echoed excruciatingly. The TV which never failed to be on was off, its screen cracked and turned into little pieces piercing the red rug beneath it. Tension crackled over the entire house, reaching its peak in the living room.

  There, he stood. His body was stiff, and unnaturally so. Fists just shy of shaking were balled up by his side. His face was covered by shadow, and his hair was tousled, as if he'd pulled it from his own scalp in anger. Below him was her, Niko's foster mother. Her hands clutched her sides protectively, and she had a look of pure desperation practically scarred onto her face. She looked at Niko, as if she were pleading for her to leave.

  But Niko was frozen. Her mind had begun to spin. She wasn't in the moment anymore. No, she was back home. In that decrepit apartment, where she and her mother would spend the days when her father wasn't there living in bliss. Where she first learned what poison was, and that she was just like it. Where she'd been forever tainted and scarred, and where her mother had been murdered. Niko was home again.

  Home, sweet home.

  A scream ripped out from her throat, as she felt her heart begin to rapidly beat. It was happening again. Her mother was going to die again, just as she had before. Niko would be helpless again, unable to do anything but watch as her father's toxin made her mother nothing but ashes in front of her. Wait. A rouge thought stopped her. I'm not helpless anymore. Niko felt the shift immediately. Instead of dread and overwhelming grief, all she felt was pure, righteous rage.

  Niko would not let her mother die again.

  In the back of her consciousness, she faintly heard voices. They sounded otherworldly, so distant they were akin to throwing stones at a wall. One sounded like a woman. She didn't sound like her mom, however, so Niko didn't care. The other was a man, and an angry one at that. His voice was weak, though. Pitiful in comparison to her father's. These voices faded as she got closer to the scene; closer to saving her mom and making her father pay for what he did.

Now, she was stood where she had been six years ago. Expect, she wasn't a little girl anymore. Too weak to stand up to the poison, and protect her mother. Now she was the poison. This time, the power was in her hands, not his. Niko wouldn't stand by and watch her home be ripped from her anymore. She was going to fight.

The blur only intensified as she got close enough to see their faces. Doubt crept into her mind. The faces in front of her were now ever-changing—Niko couldn't tell who it really was. Was it her mother or foster mother who cried before her, still curled up as if she thought that was enough to defend herself? Was that truly her father stood in front of her, eyes so cold and poisonous she thought she might choke just upon glancing at them, or was it just her pathetic foster father? Niko didn't know.

Now hyperventilating, the more she looked the more her stomach grew sick. Her left hand had subconsciously coiled around the scar across her stomach that burned as if it had just been wounded. Had it been? Niko couldn't discern what was reality and what was her own mind's doing.

Then, she heard it. The words that made everything clear.

"Kanji, don't do this."

That was all she needed to hear. Her eyes snapped over to see her mother's face staring back at her. She'd said it. Those were her last words before her father had killed her. They'd been a desperate plea, using her father's name one last time to try and bring some resemblance of the man she'd once loved back.

Those words repeated in her head as it happened. A foreign, but deeply primal feeling began to surge within her. The sickness in her stomach turned to power, and she felt a shiver run throughout her body as it reveled in it. Her right hand had extended itself, pointed right at her father's stomach.

The words grew louder in her head, turning into a chant. The some of the power that had started in the base of her stomach had traveled to her right arm and then to her hand, sizzling with the need to be let free. The words in her mind then began to sound different, as if her brain was fighting to find the actual phrase.

She let her eyes meet her father's one last time, before she let her poison free. Though, instead of his sickly green eyes, she was met with her foster father's fearful brown. A gasp rang through her. Niko tried to retract her hand. However, it was too late.

As her damned poison began to eat at her foster father's flesh, the words finally became clear.

"Niko, don't do this."

Her vision went black.

☢︎︎

DISTANT SIRENS BLARED IN HER EARS. Disorientation ruled over her mind and body, making her vision cloudy and her limbs weak. As Niko began displaying the signs of consciousness, she started hearing more rustling around her.

What seemed like minutes passed by, and by then her vision had cleared. Glancing around in confusion, Niko was able to come to the conclusion that she was in a moving vechile. Windows caged her in on the sides, while she'd been tightly strapped down by a suffocating seatbelt. To her fogged mind, this was oddly familiar.

Niko went to move her hands and found a thick piece of rope binding them together. The circulation in her wrists was practically nonexistent at this point because of that, which made her begin to worry. Had she been kidnapped? No, this car is too casual for something like that. She concluded quickly. Then why am I tied up in the backseat of a car, speeding away from my foster house?

Niko racked the misty depths of her head, searching for anything that would give her an answer. Last she remembered was ... spending the day with Katsuki after an argument with her foster father. Okay, then what else happened after that? He had walked her home, been extra protective for some reason, and then what?

Niko's eyes widened as the memories slowly crept up on her. Flashes of a broken TV and flickering light flooded her brain; images of constantly changing rooms and people scorned her memory. She'd seen her mother's last moments played out in front of her again, expect it ... wasn't her parents? No, Niko had been hallucinating. It wasn't her parents in front of her that time. It was her foster parents.

The most important moment came back to her last. Fizzled out feelings of tension weakly circulated within her again, as if her own body was telling her parts of the story itself. That feeling was her quirk. There was no mistaking it. Even if she rarely allowed herself to feel its rush, Niko still knew the feeling by heart. Then, she saw her own hand shakily outstretched before her, and a flash of corroded aqua. Then, a dull remembrance of a man's scream sounded throughout her head.

The conclusion from these memories was easy to come by. Niko had done the exact thing she'd always feared. She'd allowed herself to feel too much, to become so engrossed into a moment that she used her quirk and most likely gravely injured her foster father. It didn't matter if he was in the wrong, or if he'd brought it upon himself by pushing and pushing her in till her mind and body met its breaking point; in the end it was her who caused the most damage. And it would be her who paid the price.

That was why she was back in this car, right? To pay for what she'd done. Late night car rides like this were all too familiar for her. Niko knew exactly what this was, and where she was going. Right back into that forever-spinning vortex. The system was staking its bloody claim over her once again, wasn't it? Coming back into her life singing lies of salvation whilst they planned to do nothing but toss her around to any filth willing to take her. Oh, and this time she knew it would be even worse than before.

Now, Niko wasn't as innocent as she used to be. She'd committed the ultimate crime in society's eyes: using her malice-filled quirk. She'd proved what she had known to be true since she'd seen her mother's body crumple to dust in front of her, whilst she managed to live because of the hereditary rot corroding every inch of her skin: that Niko was just as much poison as her dad was.

No matter where she ran, she would never escape that fate. It had tracked her down even there, at her longest standing foster home, where she'd made a real life for herself despite her foster father's ill will. Where she'd met Katsuki and finally experienced what it was like to have a friend; to have someone who didn't care about her quirk, and who just cared about her. Niko had everything she ever wanted there, and had thrown it all away in a moment's notice.

She was every bit as rotted as her father said she'd be.

How ironic was that? Years later, his damn words finally take hold after she acted exactly as he had. It was so disgustingly horrific that Niko began to feel nauseous.

  "You have certainly lived up to that reputation that damned quirk gave you now, huh?" A voice called out, ripping Niko from the confines of her brain. She hadn't even realized yet that someone had to be driving the car in order for it to move. The voice, which she figured was female, chuckled to herself and talked again. "You better not try to get out of those constraints, Niko Namai. It will only make what's about to happen a lot more difficult for you."

  Niko shuddered in her seat at the pure pleasure in this woman's voice. She was enjoying speaking to her as if she were a rapid animal, being transported for its inevitable slaughter. "What is about to happen to me, then?" Niko still asked, despite the nausea in her stomach only getting worse.

  "Well, good thing for your rotten little self, is that it was clear that your foster father was abusive, so it will be easy to claim self-defense for your ass. Meaning, no juvenile training school for you. Though, in my opinion, I think it would be safer for the rest of us if they locked you up there for good," the woman monologued, laughing to herself once again. "I looked over your record. Seems like this was the longest you've lasted in a home. Good job for screwing this one up. The agency almost thought you were going to finally get adopted. But nope! Who would want to adopt a kid with quirk like yours? I know I wouldn't."

  It took everything in Niko not to simultaneously break down into tears or burst into a fit of rage. Her restricted hands shook in their binding, and she could feel that bubbling feeling welling up within. However, Niko would not allow herself to use her quirk. After all, that was what got her into this situation in the first place.

  In all fairness, if she was being honest with herself, the woman was right about her.

  Maybe that was why her words stung so much, but Niko couldn't deny them. Everything she was saying was true. She was rotten. She was a screw-up. She had never gotten as close to adoption as she'd been merely hours from now. And she most certainly was never going to be now. Her tainted quirk made sure of that. That wrenched woman's nasty words were the truth, no matter how much Niko desperately wanted them not to be.

"But my opinion clearly doesn't matter." The woman had started talking again. "I have a feeling they're just gonna throw you right back into the system once this fizzles out. Though, you won't be placed anywhere permanently. Most likely, you'll be like just above the definition of a homeless person. They'll have you moving house left and right in till you hit eighteen and they can abandon you completely."

Another round of rage flashed throughout her body, making her hands move and create a sound loud enough to hear. That made the woman whip around, a look of fear plastered across her ugly face. The car nearly swerved off the road because of her lack of attention, and was only corrected just at the last moment.

A sick feeling of satisfaction came over Niko at her reaction. All she'd done was simply move, and it had scared this woman so bad she'd nearly crashed the car. Was that how terrifying her quirk really was? One small movement could send someone into a horrified panic? The thought sickened and oddly excited her. At the realization that it excited her, Niko had to hold herself back from throwing up.

The woman didn't speak again after that. The rest of the car ride left Niko to her own thoughts, however difficult they may be.

She reminisced about her time at this foster home. Some about the few good moments she'd had at first with her foster father. Then her mind took her to her foster mother, and all the times they spent together; that woman had truly been the closest to a mother figure she'd had since her real mom. Lastly, her thoughts came to the boy who she had foolishly let carve out a place in her rotted little heart.

Katsuki. She thought, feeling that painful tugging sensation on her heart at the mere thought of him. I wonder what you'll think of me when you hear the news. Will he think her just as everyone else does? See her just as a vessel for her quirk and nothing else? Or will he keep the same image of her in his mind? Of the girl who only wanted companionship; who just wanted someone to see past her quirk and see her. Now, thanks to my stupid self, I'll never know.

Niko would never see him again. She was sure, after she'd spent so much time there and left the way she did, they would never send her to a foster home in that area ever again. And it wasn't like she had a phone of her own. He had no way of reaching her, no way of finding her. To Katsuki Bakugo, Niko Namai would become a distant memory. And there was nothing she could do about it.

I didn't even get to say goodbye. The thought pained her in a way that seemed unbearable. No, I can't let that be his memory of me. I need to at least say goodbye!

Niko knew her thinking was irrational. After all, they were probably too far away now to go back, and it wasn't like her driver was a sympathetic person. But that wouldn't stop her from trying.

"Ma'am, could you please go back. There's someone I need to say goodbye to," she said as loud as she could get her voice to go without cracking. "I know it's a big ask for someone like me, but please. I'll never see him again if I don't—"

A loud cackle interrupted her. The woman had thought her words were funny. "You are really messed up in the head, aren't you? You think anyone's gonna want to see your disgusting face after what you've done? It doesn't matter what they thought of you before. You will become like the dirt on their shoes. Nothing. Get that through your damn head, Namai. You are nothing."

This time, Niko couldn't hold back the tears. Salty and bitter, they rolled down her cheeks whilst she swiftly tried to get rid of them, embarrassed by her own inability to control her useless emotions. Niko never wanted to do this again. She never wanted to feel this much over just another person; just another person who will eventually betray her and leave her all alone once again.

This was forever her fate, wasn't it? Niko would forever be alone with the ruin she created. In the end, she had nobody to blame but herself. Niko Namai would always end up without a home.

☢︎︎

Bakugo when he finds out (years later btw) what actually made Niko leave ^^^

Anyways, that was the prologue! I hope it was a decent introduction to Niko and her character, and her and Bakugo's complex relationship. And for context for the timeline and everything, Niko and Bakugo are both twelve here; and the prologue takes place about three years before they enter UA.

But that's it for now! See you in chapter one! 🫶🏼