"Fucking hell," Robin cursed for at least the hundredth time that day, cringing at the memory of her Uncle walking in on them. John, yet again, laughed. "This isn't fucking funny, Lennon!"

"It is a bit," he commented, not bothering to hide his smirk, clearly far more amused at the situation than Robin was, as all she could think of was the worst case scenario.

Albert hadn't loitered in her room long. In fact as soon as Robin tried to explain he swiftly left, far too embarrassed on all of their behalves to wait around, and his quick arrival and departure left both John and Robin stunned to silence until John started laughing and Robin started crying. It had taken her a good half hour before John managed to get her to stop panicking about what had happened, though the thought of it still made her chest tighten. She knew it was inevitable that she'd have to talk to her Uncle, impossible to ignore the situation, and as she feared the worst, John decided that to distract her the two of them would go out for the day.

That was how the two of them ended up sat by the docks, the winter wind cutting into the two of them as they sat on a bench sharing a punnet of chips, Robin carrying her camera with her on a strap around her neck. John had gone back to his house to freshen up and change, giving Robin chance to sort herself out. Her hair had been in tangles from the rain the night before, but she'd managed to make herself look somewhat presentable, tying her hair back and applying the faintest bit of makeup so she at least didn't look as rough as she felt, and as she left the house wrapped up in a thick winter coat and long scarf, she felt a pang of guilt as she realised Albert was in the kitchen and had heard her leaving yet hadn't called to speak to her.

She couldn't help but think that his silence wasn't just out of embarrassment but anger. Regardless of the changing times, even if their generation was more liberated than societies before, the shame was still there. She remembered when her mother enrolled her in Sunday school just so she could get rid of her for a few hours on the weekend, and the only real thing she learnt, other than Nuns being rather terrifying when they wanted to be, was that sex and love was sacred and to disregard those rules was immoral. Robin thought that was all old-fashioned and was far more concerned with looking after herself than thinking about some age-old rules of society, but the rest of the world, even if it was slowly changing, wouldn't see it that way.

What if Albert saw things like that conservatively? Her mother's parents had caught her in a relationship and kicked her out, what if her Uncle would do the same? Or worse, what if he told her mother? Her Uncle had previously been so understanding, so kind to her, but what if his sympathies to her ended the moment he walked in on her and John? What if he fired her from the restaurant in retribution for having John stay the night? Where would she go, what would she do?

Robin felt herself panicking again, so she distracted herself by looking out over the docks, watching the ships sail along the Mersey. She liked the docks, it was calming, and given that it was New Years Day it was practically deserted, just the way she liked things. With hardly anyone else around, it could just be her and John, and when she was with him alone she could just pretend that they were a proper couple, and not two friends casually sleeping with each other. Of course, the pretending wasn't too easy given that her mind kept cutting the the moment her bedroom door had opened and they were both exposed.

"After everything he's done for me, he's an actual angel on Earth, and this is how I repay him?" she muttered, picking at the chips on John's lap with the small wooden fork. "We should have gotten gravy with these,"

"Weird Yorkshire woman," John rolled his eyes in amusement before he thought about what she'd originally said. "Should I be offended? Y'know it's not a crime what we were doing,"

"No, don't be offended, it's just different for you," she tried to explain, sighing as she realised he didn't experience the same societal constraints that she'd unknowingly internalised. "It's different for girls and lads with this sort of thing. When people find out about what we've been doing you'll be hailed a hero, Mister Stud the Top Shagger. Meanwhile I'll just be called a slag and told I've got no morals and that I'm a sinful little wench,"

"You're so creative with your words when you're angry," John observed, making her scowl at him. He nudged her reassuringly with his elbow. "It's not gonna be that bad. Like you said, he's an 'actual angel', he's not gonna be that angry,"

"How would I know though? I'd only met him a couple of times until I moved in with him, for all I know he's only nice cause he feels sorry for me," she theorised, her voice raising a little in nerves. "He's done so much for me, got me enrolled in college, got me a job, got me a bloody camera, and now he's caught us practically shagging! He wouldn't even speak to me before I left, what if he does toss me out?"

"You ought to be ashamed of yourself, girl," an old woman who was passing by called to her with a disgusted look. Robin felt overwhelmingly embarrassed that someone had overheard them, even if the docks were practically deserted.

"Oh, fuck off, like you never shagged in your day," John snapped viciously at the woman, who merely tutted and carried on walking. John flashed her his middle finger before he turned back to Robin, talking hold of her hands and squeezing them tightly. "Look, you're just worried, you're bound to be, it's a bloody weird situation. He's not gonna be mad though, did you not see his face? He looked more embarrassed than us two put together, I can't imagine Albert Knight, good soul that he is, tossing you out and calling you a harlot,"

Robin sighed, knowing he was probably right. He usually was, even if she hated admitting it. Even if the situation made her want to bury herself in a dark room and never emerge, John's presence was, as ever, making her feel much calmer. She couldn't believe that John, the wild teddy boy who could be the angriest person she knew whenever he wanted to be, was the one who always made her see sense, the one who made her feel much more secure in herself. As awful as she still felt, he was making her see sense a little more.

Still though, there was the worry of reality, eating away inside of her. What if John was wrong, what if Albert was actually angry? They had, after all, gone behind Albert's back. Robin had invited John to spend the night, even if she had been drunk. It was his house, and her fate was entirely in his hands. Robin knew she liked her Uncle, but she didn't realise just how much the admired him until she felt overwhelmed by the thought of upsetting or disappointing him. He was so good, the thought of making him angry seemed terrifying.

"Come on, you're thinking again," John said firmly, tossing one of the last chips at her. She scowled, mostly to hide her sudden urge to laugh with him, burying her face in her hands. "Seriously, there's no point worrying, it'll be what it'll be, you're only gonna waste your time panicking. Let's go for a walk,"

He didn't give Robin the chance to reply just in case she objected, taking hold of her arm and pulling her off the bench. He tossed away the few remaining chips in the nearest bin and the two of them walked along side the railings, watching the river and the way the wind make it keep lashing up against the wall. There was something quite beautiful about the Mersey, just like the rest of Liverpool. The urban grittiness of the North was always beautiful to Robin, and she was surprised by how much she was falling in love with the city. She'd not even noticed just how at home she had begun to feel in the city.

Across the road, Robin noticed the Liver building. On top, standing out against the cloudy-grey January sky, she saw the Liverbird, and without second thought, raised her camera and took a picture of it. The iconic Liverpool building deserved photographing, especially since it was her first time seeing it. She was so focused on the picture that she didn't notice John watching her, a small smirk on his face. He jumped in the way of her shot just as she clicked the button, and in outrage she moved to hit his arm, making him laugh madly. It was impossible for her to not laugh along with him when he was like that, looking so wildly good looking in his mischief.

"Fine, pose properly then," she instructed seriously, and as he stood sideways on, looking over his shoulder at her with raised eyebrows and a smirk, she took a photo of him. "Have you ever thought about taking anything seriously?"

"You'd get bored of me very quickly if I was serious," he remarked, pulling another pose, this time throwing his arms in the air with a grin.

"Oh, you'd be surprised, I don't think you could ever bore me," she rolled her eyes, putting her camera down again as she moved closer to him. "After all, I'm the boring one,"

"Never," he grinned, taking hold of her coat collars and pulling her close for a kiss. "You just keep getting more and more interesting,"

She grinned before kissing him again, forgetting that they were out in public. She thought of the old woman who'd told her to be ashamed and couldn't help but want to laugh. Robin had spent far too long being ashamed, not just of her relationship but for just being herself, and she didn't want that anymore. Maybe John was right, worrying was no use, so she wasn't going to worry about the judgement or the consequences. Perhaps people would think her immoral or think she was making mistakes, but did that matter? She was young, you're meant to make mistakes when you're young.

John and Robin walked all round the docks hand in hand making conversation about anything and everything. The two of them lost track of time, not realising quite how late it was until they noticed it had gone dark. Deciding it was time to head home, the two of them got on the bus, and as they sat on the back row, John lighting them each a cigarette, Robin let out a small sigh.

"I thought you weren't worrying?" John raised his eyebrow at her as he handed her the cigarette, and she rolled her eyes, taking a long drag.

"I wasn't," she shrugged, continuing to smoke. "It's just... He's gonna want to talk about it, but what do I say? I can't imagine he'll just pretend it didn't happen,"

"You'd be surprised," John remarked, remembering the expression on her Uncle's face when he saw the two of them. "Just tell him the truth,"

"What, 'oh, sorry Uncle Albert, I've just been shagging John casually these last few days cause we quite like each other but neither of us have the balls to admit it properly and I invited him to stay the night while we were drunk, sorry you had to walk in on that'?" she said, blowing a cloud of smoke over towards the window, ignoring the way John was snickering at her.

"Maybe only tell him that if your Mum's not around," he laughed before grimacing. "At least it was him who caught us and not your Mum or my Aunt. God, I think both of them would've murdered us,"

"Mimi nearly did catch us, if you remember rightly!" Robin exclaimed with a small laugh. "Seriously though, what do I say?"

"Just tell him we were drunk and made a mistake," John shrugged, looking as if he wanted to avoid the conversation all together, though his excuse wasn't nearly good enough for Robin who sighed again. "Fine, you could just tell him you're my girlfriend,"

"Yeah, but that's not strictly the truth though, is it?" she rolled her eyes, not meeting his gaze as she tossed her cigarette out of the window.

It was only when she looked back to John that she noticed just how serious his expression was, and her eyes widened slightly. Was he genuinely asking her out, in his own sort of way? It seemed very John to not ask her properly, to just use the title as if their relationship had naturally reached that point to the extent it was unspoken. After all, this was John, the lad who'd told her multiple times he struggled to talk about his feelings openly. It shouldn't surprise her if that extended to asking her out properly, even if he'd had a real way with words when telling her how he felt.

At the same time though, it was John, and no matter how much she trusted him and no matter how badly she was enamoured by him, she couldn't help but remember just how much of a joker he was. He could quite easily crack a grin and tell her it was all one big tease, even the previous declarations. He could easily see the whole thing as a joke, unknowing that he practically held her delicate heart in his hands and could so easily break it. No matter how much she trusted him, she couldn't help but think about the last boy who'd called her his girlfriend and just how hurt she had been because of him.

She'd clearly hesitated for too long as John quickly looked away, as if embarrassed. Maybe that was why he'd looked uncomfortable before, because he was so desperate to ask her but didn't know how to properly. The two of them sat in an awkward silence, neither knowing what to say, a million different narratives running through their minds. Until one of them spoke to explain their thoughts, the other fell further into a pit of doubt and misunderstanding, but neither of them had the courage to actually speak. It was their feelings on the line, and neither of them wanted to hurt the other let alone themselves.

"Do you really want me to be your girlfriend?" Robin finally asked, her voice small as she dared to look at him, feeling as though she was seeing him for the first time all over again.

"Dunno," he shrugged, and it was like she saw his defensive walls go straight up with her own eyes, regret twisting inside her. "I get it if you think it's too soon or I'm not good enough or-"

"No, you're more than enough," she interrupted him firmly, feeling bravery seize her as she leant over and took hold of his hands.

Everything felt new all over again. She'd held his hand a dozen times before, probably more. They'd shared kisses, their thoughts and feelings, and Robin had trusted him with her whole self, yet it felt as though they were seeing each other properly for the first time. This was new territory for them both as no longer were they just the friends having a fling with feelings they didn't quite understand, they were now prospective partners. They could have easily moved on from their affair, laughed it off and gone back to being friends, but both of them knew silently that after this conversation, it wouldn't be the same between either of them ever again.

It might have been too soon, and completely unforeseen, but if there was one thing Robin had learnt that day, it was to seize the moment. It was a New Year, and she didn't want to live with regrets, she couldn't possibly risk losing John.

"I want to be your girlfriend," she said honestly, her voice shaking ever so slightly in her desperation to show him just how much she cared. "I want to be with you, John, I promise,"

"Are you sure?" he asked a little cautiously, as if nervous she would back out, not that he'd blame her. "This isn't just cause of your Uncle or... I'm not an easy person to be with,"

"Neither am I," she told him, taking her hand out of his to instead stroke through his wild hair. "But we may as well give this a proper go,"

"Yeah... yeah," he nodded, sounding hesitant at first until he squeezed her hand, raising her hand to his lips and kissing her knuckles. "It does make sense, I am mad about you. So, you're my girl now then?"

"And you're my lad," she said, cracking a smile and laughing at how new and strange it felt.

It wasn't like the last time she had a boyfriend. Referring to Ant as her boyfriend had felt strange in how forced it was, how it felt as though she was constantly getting used to the title and compromising her feelings to convince herself to like him. Referring to John as her boyfriend only felt strange because of how normal it felt, how quickly the title felt right, and the thought of it made her feel warm inside. She leant over to kiss him, and he quickly wrapped his arms around her.

"We need to remember this," she said as soon as the two of them broke apart, and John watched with amusement as she lifted her camera up, turning the lens to the two of them, holding it as far away from them as she could. "I've not attempted self-portraits yet..."

John pushed a kiss to her cheek as she pressed the button.

***

The breakfast table was silent.

It usually was when it was all three of them, both Robin and her mother avoiding each other's gaze, but usually they at least had Albert trying to break the ice with conversation. The morning of the second of January, however, was awkwardly silent, as Albert sat reading the paper, not even looking up when Robin put the teapot and a plate of toast down on the table.

When Robin arrived home last night, still all loved up and giddy, Albert was nowhere to be seen. He'd left a plate of food for her in the fridge with a note on the kitchen counter reading 'Robin, gone to visit my friend Brian. See you soon.' She'd taken the food up to her room and hoped it was a peace offering rather than his departure acting as him avoiding her, and by the time she heard him come in she was in bed and didn't want to get up to have the uncomfortable conversation with him.

She didn't feel guilty anymore though. Perhaps that had disappeared the moment a label was put on her relationship, because it was no longer a fling, but a real and solid thing. She had a boyfriend that she was falling deeply in love with, and so it didn't matter if Albert had caught them. Whatever his reaction was, it didn't change her feelings for John. If Albert wanted to throw her out, if he told her mother and she turned her outrage onto her, that wouldn't matter either. She could go find a bedsit, she could find another job, everything would be okay.

"Did you have a good New Years?" Rita asked suddenly, catching both Robin and Albert off-guard; she didn't usually attempt conversation, especially not since Boxing Day.

"Yes, thank you," Robin answered, staring down at her plate of toast that she didn't have the appetite for anymore. "Did you?"

"Yes, it was... Different," her mother replied, and Robin had to fight off a frown as she noted the sad tone in her voice. "Wasn't like a New Year at home, was it? I missed coming home and seeing you and Robert passed out in the living room,"

"Yeah," Robin said, feeling her throat tighten, and the only way she could think to distract herself from the potential pain of grief was to look up to Albert and ask, "How was your party?"

"Oh, it was fine, same as usual really, just my group of fellow bachelors," he nodded with his usual smile. Surely if he was smiling like that he didn't hate her? "Are you alright to work tomorrow? It's still classed as a Christmas shift so I'll pay you double time, plus Kay's on shift too,"

"Yeah, cool, of course," she nodded eagerly, feeling her nerves disappear momentarily.

If Albert was truly angry at her for the morning before, he wouldn't be paying her double time, but in the same thought they always talked about work at meal times, so perhaps he was just trying to act normal so Rita didn't become suspicious about something going on. At least he wasn't telling her about what he'd seen, so Robin was grateful for that at least.

"I have to go to work," Rita said after another while of silence, surprising the two other Knights when she got up and moved to Robin, squeezing her shoulder almost lovingly. "See you,"

"Yeah, see you," Robin forced a small smile.

Both Robin and Albert remained silent as Rita left the kitchen, both of them listening to her whistling some annoying tune as she put on her coat and shoes. They both watched each other carefully, studying the other as if trying to figure out what they were thinking. It was only when the sound of the front door opening played throughout the house, and ALbery broke their eye contact to watch down the hall as Rita left the house. He waited until the door shut, hearing the key twist in the lock to signify Rita's departure before he sighed, his head falling into his hands.

"Look, Uncle Albert..." Robin began, her voice firm and confident before he cut her off.

"Do you want me to put a lock on your door?" he asked, his head still in his hands, taking her by surprise to the point she practically snorted out a laugh.

"Are... Are you serious?" she asked, unsure as to what was actually going on. "I thought, I don't know, that you were gonna throw me out or call me a slag or something, or... Bloody hell!"

"Course I'm not gonna throw you out! And I'm definitely not going to call you that!" he seemed outraged at the thought of it as he let out a small sigh. "I should have probably waited rather than bursting in, it's my own fault,"

"Again, are you serious?" she exclaimed, feeling angry at herself for building the situation into something when it was clearly nothing. "I thought you'd be fuming!"

"Robin, you're old enough to make your own decisions, and I'm not gonna preach to you about some social expectation that I think is a load of bullshit," he sighed, sounding more serious than she'd ever heard him. "I personally believe that people should be free to love who they want without the judgement of others and without people acting all high and mighty trying to dictate what's right and wrong. If you like John, then you like him, and I don't think I'm in any position to tell you what you can and can't do,"

"That's really... Cool of you," she frowned, realising just how amazing her Uncle was yet again. "It's not just a fling though, me and John. Me and him, we're going out properly. He asked me to be his girlfriend,"

"Good," Albert smiled reassuringly, and Robin had never felt more relieved. "I always liked John, he's a good lad. God knows you both deserve a little bit of happiness, and if he makes you feel happy then I think he's brilliant,"

Robin couldn't agree more.

***
Word count: 4070
***