ELLIE

"Tell me about yourself."

"What is your greatest strength?" 

"What makes you a better candidate for this position?"

The questions from the job interview repeatedly plays back in my brain. My answers were mediocre, to say the least. The typical cut-out ones you hear in TV shows and read in books. I had been so nervous that my mind went blank, and now I couldn't remember what I even said. 

I just sped through them, wanting to end the pain as quickly as possible, but now as I walk out of the interview room, all my prepared responses comes flooding back to me. I can suddenly think of so many better things to say instead of what I actually said. If only humans had the power to control time and go back, I would have overused that ability. 

The receptionist at the front desk gives me a friendly smile as I walk past her, so I politely do the same, trying not show what I was really feeling inside. I push the glass door and take a deep breath of the fresh air as I step outside. The warmth of the setting sun shines on my face and I am enveloped by the lingering heat. My black hair was already absorbing the warmth, making my scalp sweat. 

Freedom, I think to myself for a quick second before the wave of failure hits me. 

I let out a dejected sigh once the door shuts behind me. Guess that's another no-go. I'll have to go back to more job-searching when I'm back home. I cross the failed interview off my mental checklist as I make my way toward my second hand Toyota Corolla. 

The what-ifs continue in my head as an imagined scenario of a successful interview plays out. 

"Tell me about yourself," says the woman dressed in a pristine suit in front of me. She holds a ballpoint pen in her hand with my resume on the table as she looks at me, waiting for me to answer. 

My heart pounds loudly, the sound deafening, but I ignore it and open my mouth to speak. "I am currently a second-year student at Castaway University with a major in Business Administration. I volunteered a lot during high school and am currently working part-time as a tutor on campus. From those experiences, I have improved my customer service and communication skills."

She nods and quickly scrawls something on the paper before continuing. "What is your greatest strength?" 

"I have great time management," I start of with a confident smile. "I keep track of all my upcoming tests and deadlines. I rarely ever procrastinate and always turn in my assignments on time."

She nods again. "Great. And what makes you a better candidate for this position?"

"I believe I have the necessary skills and perseverance to work this position. Even though I may be unfamiliar with some of the software, I am confident that I will be able to teach myself how to use it and catch up in no time."

The woman scribbles something else on the paper before putting down her pen. "Alright, thank you for your time. That concludes our interview. You will hear back from us in a few weeks."  

We both stand up and she stretches her hand out to shake my hand. 

"Thank you," I say with a wide smile. "Have a good day."

I lock the car doors immediately after I get in and let out another sigh. If only that scenario was real. I insert the car key and start the engine before turning on the A/C to cool down the stuffy car. It was already October but it still felt too hot. 

I was just about to turn on my music when my phone rings. I take it out of my tote bag and groan when I see who's calling. [Mom]

"Hello?"

"How did it go?" she asks in Chinese. I can hear the anticipation on her voice already.

"It was...fine" I say nonchalantly. "I have to wait to hear back."

"Oh, do you think you got it?"

"I don't know," I sigh, not wanting to divulge anything too personal. My mom and I were not close like some mother-daughter relationships for many reasons and neither one of us really bothered to try to change that. 

"Why do you always respond with that?" she complains with annoyance. "Always don't know. What do you even know then?" 

She launches herself into a 10 minute lecture about respectfulness and conversations as well as the importance of getting a good job to put on my resume before hanging up.

I take a deep breath and try to exhale all the stress she just gave me. I can do this. I'll find a job, no worries. That one just wasn't meant for me. I got this.

+++

It was a short drive back to the apartment complex I stay at near campus during the weekdays. I quickly park my car in the designated spot and get out with my things. Locking the doors behind me with the car fob, I hurry up the stairs and to my apartment since it was already dark. 

I unlock the door with practiced speed and slip inside before shutting the door behind me.

My apartment had two bedrooms, one bathroom, an open kitchen and living room. The rent was too expensive to afford alone, so I shared it with three other girls I met online. Two girls shared a room, and I was only close with the girl I roomed with. 

Seeing their shoes by the door, I already knew they were all home. 

"Hey," a voice greets me from the sofa near the front door. It was Sofia. She was a sophomore like me, and we were just polite with another. I don't open up to people easily, and since we never found common ground to talk about, it was just left like that. She didn't know I had an interview since we were not close enough to even tell each other that.

"Hey," I say back. "Where's Nicole?" I ask about the other housemate since they're usually together like peas in a pod. 

"Oh, she's showering," Sofia responds with her eyes focusing back on the TV. 

"Ah, okay. See you," I finish lamely before walking down the hall to my room. 

I slowly open the door and see my roommate lounging on her bed. 

The room wasn't that spacious, shaped like a squared box, so we had almost all sides of the wall with something pushed against it. A twin bed and desk on each side with barely enough room for two drawers. 

"Yo, how'd it go?" Jenna asks right away with a smile before seeing the expression on my face. The smile subsequently slips off her face with a look of concern. "Not good?"

"I bombed it, basically," I sigh again. How many times have I even sighed today? "I got too nervous and screwed it all up. I am such a dumbass." I drop my tote bag by my desk and sit on my chair. 

"Oh come on, it couldn't have been that bad," she tries to assure me. "You're not dumb, Ellie. You're one of the smartest people I know." She makes eye contact with me and her reassurances make me feel a tad better.

"I guess," I mumble, looking away and opening up my laptop. "More job-searching again." I turn it on and wait for it to start up. "Yay me."

"Don't worry, Ellie. You'll land a job in no time. It's their loss for not hiring you."

I respond with another sigh.

"Did you eat dinner yet?" she asks, changing the subject. 

I shook my head. 

"I'll cook for us?" she suggests, wiggling her eyebrows. "That should cheer you right up!" She knew how I loved the Korean cuisine she makes. "Kimbap?"

Hearing that word makes me smile. I look at her gratefully and reply, "You are too kind."

"Of course. I'm your best friend," she winks. "No one else will voluntarily go through the labor of making kimbap except for me." 

Her words remind me of how awkward we were with each other when we first met a year ago. She was so outgoing and I was a complete introvert, but we bonded quickly after we found our mutual interest in Korean dramas and boy bands as well as romance novels. We got even closer when we realized we both were avid Colleen Hoover fans, Co-Horts. Coincidentally, Jenna and I were both in our second-year of college. 

"I'll be grateful forever, Jenna," I say, clutching my heart. "I'll haunt you after I die," I add jokingly. "You won't be able to get rid of me then."

"Wow, thank you. I really need a ghost, Ellie. I feel so protected already," she deadpans before getting off her bed. "I should have all the necessary ingredients. I'll make it now."

"Thank you, thank you!" 

When Jenna leaves the room, I turn back to my laptop and type in my password. I open up the Internet browser and check my email. I remember I was supposed to get information about someone who needed my tutoring sessions. 

I see it in my inbox and quickly open it, curious at who it was and their details.

"Hi Ellie,

I have attached below your new tutoring schedule with your new student. He needs tutoring for business writing starting this Monday. Since he is falling behind and struggling a bit more than your usual students, he will need longer sessions. Two hours a day, three times a week. 9-11 AM, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Please let me know if that works with you.

Best regards,

Daisy Patterson 

Tutoring Center

Castaway University"

I click on the file attached and a PDF opens up. I read its contents with interest. The student is someone named Bryan Li. He is a third year student, majoring in Business Administration with a concentration in Accounting. He needs help with some general business classes, meaning he is pretty behind. The university has a pretty big student body so that name was completely foreign to me. I try to conjure an image of what he looks like in my head but nothing comes up. I wonder what his story is to have fallen so behind.

Liking how I would earn more money than my usual sessions which were only an hour long and twice a week, I quickly typed up a reply to Daisy saying I was able to do it. 

Before I could think anymore about this, Jenna pops her head in and tells me the food is ready. I hurriedly put my laptop to sleep and go out, excited to eat. 

A/N: 

Thank you for giving this first chapter a try! Hope you enjoyed it!  

The main characters are all Asian Americans in celebration of Asian Pacific Heritage Month. It's been a while since I've written so pardon my writing if it's lacking so far. 😬 Please do comment/DM to let me know your thoughts. I'll love to hear them~