The building entrance lobby. The guys enter. Sheldon is dressed as a medieval monk, Howard is a court jester, Raj is a medieval gentleman and Leonard is a knight. Alex is a princess.
"Worst Renaissance Fair ever." I stated.
"Please let it go, Lex."
"It was rife with historical inaccuracies. For example, the tavern girl serving flagons of mead, now her costume was obviously Germanic, but in 1487 the Bavarian purity laws or Rhineheitsgebot severely limited the availability of mead. At best they would have had some sort of spiced wine." I explained.
"You're nitpicking." Leo stated.
"Oh-ho! Really? Well here's another nit for you. The flagons would not have been made of polypropylene." Sheldon said looking at Leo.
"Renaissance fairs aren't about historical accuracy. They're about taking chubby girls who work at Kinko's and lacing them up in corsets so tight their bosom jumps out and says howdy." Howard went on.
"Bosoms would not have said howdy in the fifteenth century. If anything they would have said 'huzzah!'" Sheldon explained.
"I don't care what the bosoms say, Sheldon, I just want to be part of the conversation." Howard tried.
"(arriving with a man in tow) Hi guys. Looks like you've been to the Renaissance fair. I'm hoping." Penny pointed out.
"Renaissance fair? More of a medieval slash age of enlightenment slash any excuse to wear a codpiece fair." I went on.
"Okay, fine, whatever, um, you guys, this is my friend Eric." Penny introduced us.
"Hello." Me and Howard stated.
"Hi." Leo piped up.
"Hey." Eric piped up.
"So, yeah, good to see you." Leo tried.
"Yeah, yeah, it's good to see you too. We should really go." Penny stated.
"Yeah." Eric piped up.
"(leaving) Bye guys." Penny stated as they started leaving.
"(leaving, to Howard) Like your hat." Eric stated.
"Thanks, my mom made it. Penny with a new guy, tres awkward."Howard stated.
"It wasn't awkward. It wasn't fun. Besides, what's the big deal, we dated, we stopped dating, and now we're both moving on." Leo tried to lie.
"By moving on, do you mean, she's going out with other men and you spent the afternoon making fifteenth century soap with Wolowitz?" I asked him.
"That was not fifteenth century soap, my God those people need to learn you can't just put "ye olde" in front of anything and expect to get away with it." Sheldon tried.
"Can we please just go in, my chain mail is stuck in my underwear." Leo pointed out.
"Please never tell me that again." I stated walking up the stairs.
"You're wearing modern underwear?" Sheldon asked.
"Relatively modern. Why, what are you wearing?" Leo asked Sheldon.
"I fashioned historically accurate undergarments out of linen." Sheldon answered.
"You went out and bought linen?" Leo asked again.
"Don't be silly, I borrowed one of your pillow cases." Sheldon answered making me laugh.
"Borrowed?" Leo asked as we walked into the apartment.
"You know what, I'm happy that Penny's moving on. It gives me the freedom to move on myself." Leo said I couldn't hear what Howard said as I went to the toilet. "Of course. Out of respect." 
"You and respect should never be in the same sentence." I stated.
"So, how do you explain the ten years before Penny?" Howard asked.
"Who were you respecting then?" Raj asked him.
"What? I've dated plenty of women. There was Joyce Kim, Leslie Winkle." Leo stated.
"Two doesn't mean plenty." I stated.
"Notify the editors of the Oxford English Dictionary, the word plenty has been redefined to mean two." Sheldon stated.
"Uh, what about that girl last year at Comic-con?" Leo asked.
"Doesn't count." Raj answered.
"Why not?" Leo questioned.
"What happens in costume at Comic-con, stays at Comic-con." Raj answered.
"You're only saying that because of what happened to you." Howard piped up.
"What happened to you?" I asked him.
"N-n-n-nothing happened to me." Raj answered.
"It wasn't your fault, Raj, he was dressed as a green Orion slave girl." Howard stated. 
"H-h-h-how did we get on me, we were mocking Leonard for not moving on. Dude, you have
totally not moved on." Raj pointed out.
"Yes I have, it's just a matter of actually making a date with someone." Leo tried.
"Like who?" I asked.
"Well, there's Joyce Kim, but she defected back to North Korea so it's a little geographically undesireable." Leo stated.
"What about Leslie Winkle." Raj pointed out.
"Oh no." I stated.
"Why?" Raj asked.
"Her research methodology is sloppy, she's unjustifiably arrogant about loop quantum gravity, and to make matters worse she's often mean to us." Sheldon stated.
"I think she's smoking hot." Raj stated I just looked at him.
"I'd hit that." Howard stated.
"You'd hit anything." I stated looking at him.
"You'd hit particulate soil on a colloidal suspension. Mud." Sheldon said agreeing with me.
"Look, I like Leslie, but she's not interested in dating as much as using men as tools for stress release." Leo tried.
"Yeah, so, be a tool. Go get yourself a little rebound stress release." Howard tried.
"Technically it would only be rebound if he and Penny had actually engaged in physical intimacy." Raj pointed.
"You mean like you and Richard the slave girl?" Howard asked.
"I bought him dinner and we kissed once, that was it. (Leaving) And he told me his name was Kimberley!" Raj stated. We were in the cafeteria.
"You know how I know we're not in The Matrix?" Sheldon asked.
"How?" Leo questioned.
"If we were, the food would be better." I stated.
"(arriving) Hey, Leonard." Leslie stated. I looked her up and down and snarled.
"Hey, Leslie." Leo stated.
"Hey, dummys." Leslie stated
"Bye Leslie." I stated.
"Hello to you, insufficiently intelligent person." Sheldon stated.
"Ooh, rush me to the burn unit. Hey, Leonard, do you have a second, I need to ask you something." Leslie stated.
"Uh, sure." Leo pointed out.
"Well, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go do work that promises significant results, as opposed to what you do, which does not. Yeah, you heard me." Sheldon stated as I stood up. We were in the apartment. Leonard is dressed smartly and placing wine on the table. Sheldon enters.
Sheldon: Great news. My mom sent me my old Nintendo 64." Sheldon stated.
"Terrific." Leo piped up.
"You know what this means, don't you? Break out the Red Bull, it's time to rock Mario old school." I stated.
"I kind of have other plans tonight." Leo tired.
"But it's Friday. Friday's always vintage game night. Look, mom included the memory card, we can pick up where I left off in 1999 when I had pernicious anaemia." Sheldon pointed out.
"Well, the thing is, someone's coming over." Leo said.
"Well then, no problem, I have four controllers, the more the merrier." Sheldon said.
"Sheldon, it's a date, I have a date coming over." Leo said.
"Oh, well you can't blame me for not jumping to that conclusion." Sheldon said.
"Why, what's so unusual about me having a date?" Leo asked.
"Well, statistically speaking..." I tried.
"Alright, alright. Well, uh, nevertheless, I have one now and I would appreciate it if you would, you know, make yourself scarce." Leo butted in.
"Leonard, I am a published theoretical physicist with two doctorates and an IQ which can't be accurately measured by normal tests, how much scarcer could I be?" Sheldon asked.
"You know what I mean, could you just give us a little privacy?" Leo asked.
"You want us to leave the apartment?" I asked him getting up.
"Yes." Leo answered.
"You mean just go someplace else and be... someplace else?" Sheldon asked.
"Yes." Leo answered.
"Well, why should I leave, this is our apartment too." Sheldon said.
"I know it is, and if science ever discovers a second member of your species and you two would like some privacy I would be more than happy to get out of your way." Leo pointed out.
"Well alright then." Sheldon stated as we left. We were in the entrance lobby. Me and Sheldon are sitting on the bottom step using his laptop. Penny comes down the stairs.
"Sheldon? Alex? What are you doing?" Penny asked.
"Playing Super Mario on a poorly coded Nintendo 64 emulator." I answered.
"Yeah, but why are you doing it on the stairs?" Penny asked.
"I'm a modern day Napoleon exiled to the Elba of the staircase because Leonard, get this, has a date." Sheldon answered.
"Oh. Oh, well, good for him. Yeah but, why are you sitting here, why don't you just go to a movie or something?" Penny asked.
"I'm allergic and he likes popcorn." I stated.
"Well then don't order popcorn." Penny answered.
"No popcorn at the mo... listen to yourself.
"Well why don't you go to a coffee shop." Penny stated.
"I don't drink coffee." Sheldon stated.
"And I'm allergic to coffee." I stated.
"They have other things." Penny piped up.
"What do they have?" I asked.
"I don't know, you know, cookies, pastries..." Penny went on.
"Pastries such as bearclaws?" I asked.
"Yeah, sure." Penny answered.
"I don't like bearclaws."  Sheldon stated.
"(entering) Heya Penny. Dumbass. Dumbass's sidekick." Leslie stated.
"Leslie Winkle. Of all the overrated physicists in all the labs in all the world, why does it have to be Leslie Winkle?" I asked looking at Sheldon.
"Well, they have a lot in common. I mean they're both scientists." Penny pointed out.
"Oh please. The only way she could make a contribution to science would be if they resume sending chimps into space." Sheldon stated.
"Okay, well I have a date too, so see ya." Penny stated leaving.
"Everybody has a date. Even you, Mario, going after Princess Peach. And what am I doing, I'm just enabling you." I said looking at the screen.
"(entering) I'm sorry to interrupt, batteries dying continue." Sheldon stated as I walked to get a book.
"Uh, genetic weaknesses, right, um, there's the lactose intolerance." Leo tried.
"(preparing an extension cord) Don't forget the male pattern baldness. When his uncles sit around the dinner table they look like a half carton of eggs." Sheldon stated.
"Okay, now my uncles are bald, but my Aunt Edna is one of the hairiest women you will ever meet. So... Sweet lady. It always tickles when she hugs me. (Sheldon knocks and enters again.) What now?" Leo asked.
"I have to make pee-pee." Sheldon stated.
"I'm just here for the fridge." I stated walking to the fridge.  We were sat in the university lunch room.
"I'm sorry, I am not going back to the Renaissance Fair." Sheldon stated.
"Come on, Sheldon, there's so few places I can wear my jester costume." Howard tried.
"I don't care. There are far too many historical anomalies for my comfort." Sheldon tried.
"Oh, okay, how about this. You can go dressed as a Star Trek science officer exploring a planet similar to Earth in the 1500s." Raj stated.
"You mean like Spock?" Sheldon asked.
"Sure." Raj answered.
"Fascinating." Sheldon stated.
"(arriving) Hey fellow scientists. Sheldon, Alex." Leslie stated.
"Hey, why don't we all move over there so Leslie can join us." Leo tried I just looked at him.
"Hmm, let's do it." Howard stated as me and Sheldon does not move. Leonard looks confused.
"If you're having trouble deciding where to sit may I suggest one potato two potato, or as I call it the Leslie Winkle experimental methodology." I stated.
"Don't make this hard for me." Leo tried.
"It's not hard. It's simple. You can either sit with me, your friend, colleague and roommate, Alex, your sister, your roommate, or you can sit with an overrated scientist you might have sex with." Sheldon stated.
"You're right, it is simple." Leo stated as he sits with Leslie. We were sat on the stairs. Sheldon is playing on his computer at the end of the long extension cord. I was reading.
"Hey, Sheldon, Alex." Penny stated.
"Penny." I stated.
"Third floor tonight. Mixing it up? (Sheldon indicates extension cord.) Oh. You know, I still don't understand why you just don't go to dinner or something." Penny stated.
"It gets to crowded." Sheldon stated.
"Goodnight Sheldon." Penny stated.
"Penny, hold on. Are you sure things can't work out with you and Leonard?" I asked.
"Excuse me?" Penny questioned.
"I'm just wondering if you really gave it the old college try? Or in your case the old community college try?" Sheldon asked.
"Okay, where is this coming from?" Penny asked.
"Leonard is upstairs right now with my arch enemy." Sheldon answered.
"Your arch enemy?" Penny asked.
"Yes, the Doctor Doom to my Mr Fantastic. The Doctor Octopus to my Spiderman. The Doctor Sivana to my Captain Marvel." I answered.
"Okay, I get it, I get it, I get it." Penny stated.
"Do you know, it's amazing how many supervillains have advanced degrees. Graduate school should probably do a better job of screening those people out." Sheldon continued.
"Sheldon, Alex, come back, you're losing me." Penny pointed out.
"Leslie Winkle, Penny. She belittles my research." I stated.
"Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry." She said.
"She called me dumbass." We said together.
"I know. I heard." Penny stated.
"Given this situation, I have no choice but to withdraw my previous objections to your ill considered relationship with Leonard." I stated.
"Oh, gee, well, thankyou for that. But, um, I think for now Leonard and I are just going to stay friends." Penny answered.
"No, that response is unacceptable to me." I continued.
"Sheldon, Alex, you are a smart duo, you must know..." Penny tried.
"Smart? I'd have to lose 60 IQ points to be classified as smart." Sheldon said.
"Are you going to let me talk?" Penny asked.
"I'm sorry." Sheldon stated.
"You must know that if Leonard and Leslie want to be together, nothing you can do is going to stop it." Penny tried.
"You continue to underestimate my abilities madam." I said.
"Okay, let me put it this way, if you're really Leonard's friend, and sister, you will support him no matter who he wants to be with." Penny tried.
"Wait a minute, why am I doing all the giving here? If Leonard's really my friend, why doesn't he have to support me in my hatred of Leslie Winkle?" I asked.
"Because love trumps hate." Penny answered.
"Oh now you're just making stuff up." I stated.
"Okay. Goodnight Sheldon, Alex." Penny said.
"Oh Mario. If only I could control everyone the way I control you. Hop, you little plumber, hop, hop, hop." I said pointing to the screen. We walked to the apartment. Leonard and Leslie are kissing.
"(entering) When the two of you reach a natural stopping point I'd like to have a word." Sheldon stated.
"If the word is pee-pee, just do it." Leo pointed out.
"Leonard, you are my friend. And friends support their friends, apparently. So I am withdrawing my objection to your desire to have a relationship with Leslie." I stated.
"Thank you." Leo replied.
"I will graciously overlook the fact that she is an arrogant sub-par scientist, who actually believes loop quantum gravity better unites quantum mechanics with general relativity than does string theory. You kids have fun." Sheldon continued.
"Hang on a second. Loop quantum gravity clearly offers more testable predictions than string theory." Leslie butted in.
"I'm listening, amuse me." I stated.
"Okay, well, for one thing we expect quantii space-time to manifest itself as minute differences in the speed of light for different colours." Leslie stated.
"Balderdash. Matter clearly consists of tiny strings." I butted in.
"Are you going to let her talk to me like that?" Leslie asked.
"Okay, well, there is a lot of merit to both theories." Leo answered.
"No there isn't, only loop quantum gravity calculates the entropy of black holes." Leslie stated as Sheldon grunts.
"Sheldon, don't make that noise, it's disrespectful." Leo butted in.
"I hope so, it was a snort of derision. And Alex said I could." Sheldon stated.
"You agree with me, right, loop quantum gravity is the future of physics." Leslie stated.
"Sorry Leslie, I guess I prefer my space stringy not loopy." Leo said making me laugh.
"Well, I'm glad I found out the truth about you before this went any further." Leslie said.
"Truth, what truth? We're talking about untested hypotheses, uh, it's no big deal." Leo said.
"Oh, it isn't, really? Tell me Leonard, how would we raise the children?" Leslie asked.
"I guess we let them wait until they're old enough and let them choose their own theory." Leo answered.
"We can't let them choose, Leonard, they're children." She stated as she storms off.
"Wait, where are you going?" Leo asked the woman.
"I'm sorry, I could have accepted our kids being genetically unable to eat ice-cream or ever get a good view of a parade, but this? This is a deal breaker." Leslie said before she leaves.
"Look on the bright side." I said making Leo look at me.
"What's the bright side?" Leo asked me.
"Only nine more months to comic-con." I answered walking toward the fridge.
"Oh yeah." Leo said. The Renaissance Fair. The guys are in costume. Sheldon is Spock and has a tri-corder.
"Captain, I'm getting an unusual reading." Sheldon stated.
"Yeah, that's great, you guys want corn dogs?" Leo asked us.
"Yeah." Me and Howard answered.
"That's a temporal anomaly. Corn dogs didn't come into existence until the first half of the twentieth century." Sheldon said.