We were sat in the apartment. Leonard is sorting out the Chinese food.

"Let's see, Raj was the Kung Palo Chicken." Leo stated handing Raj his food.

"I'm the dumplings." Penny piped up.

"Yes, you are." Howard answered making Alex look at him.

"I'm questioning a lot right now." Alex stated taking a drink.

"Creepy, Howard." Penny stated.

"Creepy good or creepy bad?" Howard asked Penny.

"Who was the General Tao's chicken?" Leo asked.

"That's me." Alex answered as she grabs the food.

"Who was the Shrimp with Lobster Sauce?" Leo asked again.

"That would be me. Come to Poppa, you un-kosher delight. (To Penny) I'm not necessarily talking to the food." Howard tried.

"Sit over there." Penny stated.

"(entering, to Penny who is in his spot) Sit over there. Baby wipe?" Sheldon asked as Penny moved.

"What do you have...." Penny questioned.

"Don't go there babe." Alex begged.

"Don't! Don't! Don't!" The boys begged.

"I'll tell you why." Sheldon stated.

"O-o-o-oh!" We all complained.

"I had to sanitize my hands because the university replaced the paper towels in the rest rooms with hot air blowers." Sheldon explained.

"He went there." Alex stayed slapping Sheldons arm.

"I thought the blowers were more sanitary?" Penny asked.

"Why? Don't!" The boys stated.

"Why Penny?" Alex asked.

"Hot air blowers are incubators and spewers of bacteria and pestilence. Frankly it would be more hygienic if they just had a plague infested gibbon sneeze my hands dry." Shelton explained.

"(entering excitedly) Hey guys, I just got the most amazing new... (spots Penny) ew-ew-ew." Raj stated.

"Gosh, Raj, do you think you'll ever be able to talk in front of me without being drunk? (Shakes head.) Okay, well, I'll just, um, go eat by myself." Penny said standing up.

"Don't leave me with them." Alex begged slightly.

"Penny, you don't have to do that." Leo tried.

"No, it's okay, between (indicates Raj) him not talking, (indicates Sheldon) him talking and... (indicates Howard) him, I'm better off alone, so, (to Raj) goodbye you poor strange little man." Penny says as she gives him a kiss and exits.

"She's so considerate." Raj stated as she left.

"So what's your news?" I asked the man.

"Remember that little planetary object I spotted beyond the Kuiper belt?" Raj askers

"Oh yeah, two zero zero eight NQ sub seventeen." Leo answered.

"That's a bit weird Raj. Sorry." Alex stated.

"Or as I called it, Planet Bollywood. Anyway, because of my discovery, People magazine is naming me one of their thirty under-30 to watch." Raj explains.

"Well, wow, that's incredible." Me Howard and Leo state.

"Excuse me. Thirty what, under thirty what, to watch what?" Sheldon asked.

"Thirty visionaries under thirty years of age to watch as they challenge the preconceptions of their fields." Raj explained.

"If I had a million guesses I never would have gotten that." Sheldon said.

"Because you don't know what it is." Alex told him as he put an arm around her.

"It's pretty cool, they've got me in with a guy who's doing something about hunger in Indonesia, and a psychotherapist who's using dolphins to rehabilitate prisoners, and Ellen Page, star of the charming independent film Juno." Raj explained.

"Oh, I'd so do her." Howard pointed out.

"Wouldn't we all." Alex started. The boys looked at her.

"I'm right here." Sheldon said.

"Yeah so?" Alex asked shutting Sheldon up.

"You'd do the dolphins." Leo stated.

"Do I get an honourable mention for designing the telescope camera mounting bracket you used." Howard stated.

"Sorry, it's not part of my heart-warming and personal narrative, in which a humble boy from New Delhi overcame poverty and prejudice and journeyed to America to reach for the stars." Raj explained.

"Poverty? Your father's a gynaecologist, he drives a Bentley." Alex told him looking confused.

"It's a lease." Raj told her.

"Like that makes it any better." Alex told him.

"I'm confused. Was there some sort of peer review committee to determine which scientists would be included?" Sheldon asked.

"Peer review? It's People magazine. People picked me." Raj tried.

"What people?" Sheldon questioned .

"The people from People." Raj tried.

"Raj you're confusing him even more then you did walking in." Alex told him.

"Yeah, but exactly who are these people? What are their credentials, how are they qualified, what makes accidentally noticing a hunk of rock that's been traipsing around the solar system for billions of years more noteworthy than any other scientific accomplishment made by someone under thirty?" Sheldon asked making Alex sigh.

"Boy, I bet Ellen Pages friends aren't giving her this kind of crap." Raj stated standing up before leaving.

"Are you proud of yourself Sheldon?" Alex asked looking at him.

"In general, yes. But I feel like with that look your giving me is bad." Sheldon answered.

"Yes it's bad Sheldon. Raj just won something. Be supportive for once." Alex stated grabbing her food.

"Babe where are you going?" Sheldon tried.

"I'm going to eat in my room I have work I need to do." Alex stated walking into the spare room used for all her things that didn't fit into her sheared room with Sheldon. Alex's and Sheldon's office. He is making annotations on his board. Alex is going through her laptop.

"Oh, there's my missing neutrino. You were hiding from me as an unbalanced charge, weren't you, you little subatomic Dickens?" Sheldon asked.

"(entering with Howard) Hi Sheldon hey Alex." Leo stated.

"Hey you two." Alex stated looking up.

"So you'd talk to them and not to me." Sheldon stated looking at her.

"Yes because one's my brother." Alex answered not looking up from her laptop.

"Here, look, look, I found my missing neutrino." Sheldon moved on.

"Oh, good, we can take it off the milk cartons." Howard stated.

"Well, we're going to go apologise to Raj and invite him out to dinner." Leo piped up.

"Apologise, for what?" Sheldon asked.

"Well, he came over last night with some pretty good news, and we weren't very supportive." Alex told him.

"I sense you're trying to tell me something." Sheldon pointed out.

"You were a colossal ass-hat." Alex and Howard tell him. Making them two high five.

"Oh! No, I beg to differ. Of the three of us, I was by far the most supportive." Sheldon tried.

"Really, do tell." Leo told him.

"How will Raj ever reach true greatness if his friends lower the bar for him? When I was eleven, my sister bought our father a "world's greatest dad" coffee mug, and frankly the man coasted until the day he died." Sheldon explained.

"Okay, let's try it this way, what if the People magazine thing is the best Raj is ever going to achieve?" Alex asked him.

"I had not considered that." Sheldon answered.

"Come on." Alex stated looking at him.

"I often forget other people have limitations. It's so sad." He went on.

"He can feel sadness?" Howard asked.

"No I don't think he does." Alex answered.

"Not really, it's what you and I would call condescension." Leo pointed out. The four were stood outside Raj's office.

"And when we go in there, let's show Raj that we're happy for him." Alex told him.

"But I'm not." Sheldon told us.

"Well then fake it. Look at me, I could be grinding on the fact that without my stabilizing telescope mount he never would have found that stupid little clump of cosmic schmutz, but I'm bigger than that." Howard explained.

"That is weird Howard." Alex told the man stood next to her. 

"Fine, what do you want me to do?" Sheldon asked.

"Smile." Leo told him. He does, exaggeratedly.

"Oh crap, that's terrifying." Howard stated.

"We're here to see Koothrapali, not kill Batman." Alex told him.

"Try less teeth." Howard tried. He does it isn't much better.

"Close enough, come on. (Knocking and entering.) Hi Raj." Leo stated.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Raj asked the group of four.

"We just wanted to invite you out to dinner tonight." Howard told him.

"Celebrate your thirty under thirty thing. Right Sheldon?" Alex asked as he smiles.

"It's very nice of you, I would like that." Raj stated.

"(entering) Hello boys and girl." Gablehouser stated.

"Dr Gablehouser." Raj stated.

"Dr Koothrapali." Gablehouser stated.

"Dr Gablehouser." Leo started.

"Dr Hofstadter." Gablehouser stated.

"Dr Gablehouser." Alex stated.

"Dr Hofstadter." Gablehouser stated.

"Dr Gablehouser." Sheldon started.

"Dr Cooper." Gablehouser stated.

"Dr Gablehouser." Howard stated.

"Mister Wolfowitz. Boys and Dr Hofstadter, I've got a question for you. Who in this room discovered a star?" Gablehouser asked.

"Actually, 2008 NQ sub 17 is a planetary body." Raj explained.

"I'm not talking about you, I'm talking about me. You, my exotic young friend are my star." Gablehouser stated.

"Well, you didn't discover him, you merely noticed he was here, much like he did with 2008 NQ sub 17." Sheldon pointed out.

"Sheldon!" Alex stated squeezing his hand.

"Oh, sorry." Sheldon stated as he smiles.

"Well, we've got to get you into a better office, something more suited to your status." Gablehouser went on.

"Really, you don't have to go to any trouble." Raj tried.

"How about if I put you in Von Gerlick's old office?" Gablehouser asked.

"I'd rather have Fishbine's, it's bigger." Raj answered.

"Done." Gablehouser stated.

"Wait a minute, I called dibs on Fishbine's office the day he started showing up at work in his bathrobe." Howard pointed out.

"He gets a new office, I can't even get paper towels in the men's room?" Sheldon asked.

"Sheldon." Alex stated squeezing his hand harder.

"Damn, this is hard." Sheldon said as he smiles.

"Let me ask you something, what do you think the business of this place is?" Gablehouser asked

"(after he, Alex, Sheldon and Howard whisper to each other) Science?" Leo asked.

"Money." Gablehouser answered.

"Told you." Howard told group.

"And this boy's picture in People magazine is going to raise us a pile of money taller than... well, taller than you." Gablehouser stated as he started ruffling Howard's hair.

"I have a master's degree." Howard pointed out.

"Who doesn't? Dr Koothrapali, have you ever had lunch in the President's dining room?" Gablehouser asked.

"I didn't even know there was a President's dining room." Raj answered.

"It's the same food as the Cafeteria, only fresh. Come on little buddy." Gablehouser said.

"Okay, big buddy. See you tonight guys." Raj stated as they leave.

"You can stop smiling now." Alex stated looking at Sheldon.

"Aaaah!" Sheldon stated. They were all sat round a table.

"So anyway, after a fantastic lunch I was whisked off to the People magazine photo shoot... have any of you guys ever been to a photo shoot?" Raj asked.

"No." Leo answered.

"It's fantastic, apparently the camera loves me and I it. They shot me in front of a starry background where I posed like this. (Stares into space.) They're going to digitally add a supernova, they say it's the perfect metaphor for my incandescent talent." Raj explained.

"Right, a ball of hot flaming gas that collapses in on itself." Sheldon started. Alex squeezes his hand as he smiles as a phone rings.

"Excuse me. Oh, it's my assistant Trevor. Go for Koothrapali. Uh-huh." Raj stated.

"They gave him an assistant? If I want a new pen I have to go to the bank with wire cutters." Howard pointed out.

"(still smiling) Have we at this point met our social obligations?" Sheldon asked.

"Not yet." Alex answered.

"Okay, just put it on my calendar but start thinking of a reason why I can't go, alrighty? Koothrapali out. God bless that boy, I don't know what I'd do without him." Raj told us.

"You just got him this afternoon." Leo told him.

"Yes, but I'm finding that having a lackey suits me." Raj answered.

"A lackey?" Alex asked looking at him.

"Oh, I'm sorry, is that politically incorrect? In India we just call them untouchables." Raj stated.

"Now?" Sheldon muttered to Alex.

"Almost." Alex muttered back.

"Speaking of untouchables, I've got great news for you guys. People magazine is having a reception this Saturday, and I managed to get you invited." Raj told the group.

"Oh, gee, thanks." Howard stated.

"Oh, you're welcome. Of course, I couldn't get you into the VIP section, because, you know, that's for VIPs, and you guys are just, you know, Ps." Raj stated making Alex look at him.

"There's a tribe in Papua New Guinea where, when a hunter flaunts his success to the rest of the village they kill him, and drive away evil spirits with a drum made of his skin. Superstitious nonsense of course, but one can see their point." Sheldon said as he smiles.

"(bringing another grasshopper) Here you go, Raj, you might want to drink this one slowly." Penny told him.

"Okay, so, Saturday night, can I count on my posse?" Raj asked.

"Gee, I'd love to Raj, but I can't make it." Howard stated.

"Oh, okay, twins?" Raj asked looking between the twins.

"Well, uh, no I... the... no." Leo answers.

"I've already promised Gablehouser I'd work on my presentation." Alex answered.

"Sheldon?" Raj asked.

"I can make it, but I won't." Sheldon answered.

"What are you guys talking about?" Penny asked the group.

"Well, there's a reception for my magazine article on Saturday." Raj answered.

"And you guys aren't going? I can't believe you, Raj is celebrating a tremendous accomplishment and you're not even going to be there to support him?" Penny asked.

"Hey. I have a presentation on Monday. It's for a promotion and I am not done." Alex answered.

"Okay. Fair." Penny stated.

"A tremendous accomplishment would be if the planetary body he discovered were plummeting toward Earth and he exploded it with his mind." Sheldon piped up.

"That would be cool. I'd go to that reception." Howard stated.

"Come on, this is huge, Raj is going to be in People magazine. And he didn't even have to knock up one of the Spears sisters." Penny stated.

"Would you like to go with me?" Raj asked Penny.

"Of course I would, I would be honoured." Penny answered.

"Really? Cool.

"Shame on you guys. Except Alex." Penny stated as she leaves.

"Look at that. I got a date with Penny. I can't believe it took you a whole year." Raj stated.

"Now?" Sheldon asked Alex.

"Now." Alex answered they all get up and leave. 

"(entering the apartment) Hey." Leo stated.

"Hey, good news, you don't have to sulk about Penny any more, look, there are hundreds of Croatian women just waiting for you to contact them." Howard stated.

"Anythingforagreencard.com?" Leo asked.

"I'll lend you my user name, it's wealthybigpenis." Howard stated.

"You're joking." Leo stated.

"No I've seen his computer he isn't." Alex stated.

"Well, you gotta make it easy for them, they're just learning English." Howard pointed out.

"Pass." Leo answered.

"So you're just going to sit around here and mope while Penny is out with Doctor Apu from the Kwik-e-Mart?" Howard asked.

"It's not a date, and that's racist." Leo told him.

"He's talking about that one Simpsons character." Alex stated looking at Leo.

"It can't be racist, he's a beloved character on the Simpsons. See Alex gets it." Howard stated.

"Let's just eat so I can get to bed. With any luck tonight will be the night my sleep apnoea kills me." Leo went on.

"Did you remember to ask for the chicken with broccoli to be diced not shredded?" Sheldon asked.

"Yes." Leo answered.

"Even though the menu description specifies shredded?" Sheldon asked again.

"Yes." Leo answered.

"Brown rice, not white?" Sheldon asked again.

"Yes." Leo answered.

"Did you stop at the Korean grocery and get the good hot mustard?" Sheldon asked

"Yes." Leo answered.

"Did you pick up the low sodium soy sauce from the market?" Sheldon asked/

"Yes." Leo answered.

"Thank you." Sheldon stated.

"You're welcome." Leo answered.

"What took you so long?" Sheldon asked.

"Just sit down and eat." Alex told him.

"Fine." Sheldon stated as he opened the carton before showing Leo in disgust.

"Alright, it's shredded, what do you want me to do?" Leo asked.

"I want you to check before you accept the order." Sheldon pointed out.

"Sorry." Leo answered.

"Were you distracted by the possibility that Koothrappali might have intercourse with Penny tonight?" Sheldon asked.

"He's not going to have intercourse with Penny." Leo answered.

"Then there's no excuse for this chicken. You know, this situation with Koothrapali brings to mind a story from my childhood." Sheldon went on.

"Oh goody, more tales from the panhandle." Alex muttered to Howard.

"That's Northwest Texas, I'm from East Texas, the Gulf region, home to many Vietnamese shrimpers." Sheldon explained.

"Do the shrimpers feature in your story?" Leo asked.

"No. Anyway, when I was eight, a Montgomery-Ward delivery van ran over our cat, Lucky." Sheldon explained.

"Lucky?" Howard asked.

"Yes, Lucky." Sheldon answered.

"He's irony impaired, just move on." Alex stated.

"Okay, dead cat named Lucky, continue." Howard told him.

"While others mourned Lucky, I realised his untimely demise provided me with the opportunity to replace him with something more suited to my pet needs. A faithful companion that I could snuggle with at night, and yet would be capable of killing upon telepathic command." Sheldon explained.

"So, not a puppy?" Howard asked him.

"Please, no, nothing so pedestrian. I wanted a griffin." Sheldon answered.

"A griffin?" Alex asked him.

"Yes, half eagle, half lion." Sheldon answered.

"And mythological." Leo went on.

"Irrelevant. See, I was studying recombinant DNA technology and I was confident I could create one, but my parents were unwilling to secure the necessary eagle eggs and lion semen. Course my sister got swimming lessons when she wanted them." Sheldon stated.

"Sheldon, not that we don't all enjoy a good lion semen story, what's your point." Howard stated.

"My point is, if Koothrapali is moving on to a new life of shallow, undeserved fame, perhaps this is an opportunity to create a better cohort." Sheldon explained.

"You want to breed a new friend?" Alex asked him.

"That's one option, but who has the time? But consider this, the Japanese, they're doing some wonderful work with artificial intelligence, now, you combine that with some animatronics from the imagineers over at Disney, next thing you know, we're playing Halo with a multi-lingual Abraham Lincoln." Sheldon answered. 

"Sheldon, don't take this the wrong way, but, you're insane." Howard told him.

"That may well be, but the fact is, it wouldn't kill us to meet some new people." Leo pointed out.

"Uh, for the record, it could kill us to meet new people. They could be murderers, or the carriers of unusual pathogens, and I'm not insane, my mother had me tested." Sheldon stated.

"If we do get a new friend, he should be a guy you can trust. A guy who has your back." Alex stated.

"And he should have a lot of money, and live in a cool place down by the beach where we could throw parties." Howard pointed out.

"He should share our love of technology." Sheldon stated.

"And he should know a lot of women." Howard continued.

"Yeah, let's see, money, women, technology, okay we're agreed, our new friend is going to be Iron Man." I stated jokingly making Leo laugh.