DANIEL VOLKOV

Three days passed since Clara learned the truth. Three days since she'd locked up in her room. Three days since I'd seen her or spoken to her.

If I could go back in time, I'd make sure Niko stayed in the water instead of taking his shirt off. It wasn't how I wanted her to find out. Not like that. Now it was too late.

Between the hole in my shoulder and sleep deprivation, I wasn't in the greatest mood. In the past, I'd been stabbed, thrown out of a building, and run over with a car. Being hurt was normal on many levels. But the inability to move freely and beat Niko's ass was infuriating.

I moseyed into the open living room, arm in a sling. It smelled like sizzled meat and fresh coffee. Niko, Andrei and Charlotte were eating omelettes around the oak dining table. Jorge, the chef we had hired to keep us alive, was scrubbing a dirty pot.

On the kitchen island, I noticed an untouched plate of breakfast. It belonged to Clara.

Annoyance knitted my brows. Last night, she didn't touch her dinner either. When was the last time she'd eaten anything?

I joined everyone else and stared at the food on my plate. Guilt robbed any trace of hunger.

"She was going to find out eventually," Andrei said, giving me a look that proved he knew me too well.

"How the fuck did you forget to cover your stomach?" I grumbled at Niko.

His cheeks were filled like a squirrel. "I'm sorry!"

I rubbed my hand over my face. "Save it."

For fuck's sake. Why did I care? She wasn't my problem.

Yes, she was. In less than a month, I turned her life into a nightmare.

I kidnapped and ruined her life, yet she gave me water. Yet she went as far as to help me lie to Marko, even when she didn't know the full story. You're a walking contradiction. She'd told me.

Well, so was she.

In the bathroom, the first day we got here, she'd threatened to stop me if I was hurting innocent people. That fury in her eyes. That bold determination to fight no matter what. To defend what needed protection and justice.

From the first moment I laid my eyes on her, she'd looked at me like that. With that same restless fire that kept me awake at nights.

How could I ignore that?

"You should go check on her," I said to Charlotte.

She scowled across the table. "Me? Ha. For sure."

"Come on. You're the only girl here. Aren't you tired of being surrounded by guys? Go bond. Braid each other's hair. Paint your toenails." I smirked. "Talk about Andrei."

Andrei choked on his orange juice and coughed. Niko frowned.

"You're the worst." Charlotte shoved her chair back to stand, throwing a glare in my way.

"Take it easy, Char. He's just projecting." Andrei wiped his lips with a napkin.

"P-projecting what, exactly?" I leaned forward. "What would I be—there's nothing to project—"

"That you have a stupid crush on—"

"If you finish that sentence, I will scramble you into an omelette—"

"No one asked you to tell her everything—"

"I wouldn't have, if someone kept his shirt on—"

"Come on, guys! How many times do I have to say sorry—"

Jorge set a tray of waffles between us with a sheepish grin. "Shall I take some to Mrs. Clara's room also, Mr. Volkov?"

"No. She's obviously not eating. So..." An idea struck me. A brilliant idea. I snapped my fingers with newfound urgency. "Niko, you have nothing to do today. Do you?"

He hesitated. "Why?"

"Go to a local animal shop, a shelter, whatever, and get something. You do that, and your debt is paid off. I will forgive that you're stupid, and that you can't be trusted. Deal?"

Andrei gave me a look like I had lost my last brain cell. "You are not getting Clara a pet."

"News flash. I'm a don. I can do whatever I want."

"He's right. That's not a good idea," Charlotte murmured. But I could see in her eyes, she wanted to help Clara. Despite the bruise around her nose thanks to Clara's skull. Aw.

"Then go talk to her." I smiled. "I'll buy you anything you waaant? Anything."

She shook her head. "What am I supposed to say? I'm sorry your dad killed our mom? Let's be friends?" She scoffed. "We are the last people she would ever want to be around. Trust me. There's nothing we can do. It's a lost cause."

"Ya'll are just pessimists."

Andrei chimed in. "We should just wait. Hopefully she'll feel guilty enough to help us when Marko reaches out. In the meantime, just give her space. She's not a part of us. She was always meant to be a means to an end. A pawn in the game that you created."

I ground my teeth. "She won't be very useful if she dies from starvation, will she?"

Silence settled over the table.

"No volunteers?"

I snapped my fingers at Niko. "I can't be seen in public with an injury and risk Tomasso finding out. Go to a shelter and Face-time me. I'll help you find something."

"What if she's allergic?" Charlotte scowled.

"To animals? I highly doubt it."

"How do you know?"

I scratched the side of my nose. "Just a guess."

And a couple of hours of online stalking. Her social media posts indicated she liked animals. Among a bunch of other things. So what? Knowledge was power. Especially knowledge about your enemies.

Niko sighed, standing up to leave. "Alright, I'll go."

"Thank you, you're the best! I knew you were my favorite for a reason!"

~

A couple of hours later, I knocked on Clara's door.

Dead silence greeted me from the other side.

I knocked again, leaning my ear closer to detect signs of movement. Nothing.

"Knock knock. You alive?"

An unsettling feeling dropped to my stomach. If she hurt herself...

"Hello?" I raised my voice, knocking more urgently. "Clara?"

"Leave me alone." Her irritated voice was music to my ears.

Phew. Not dead, then.

"You left your thong on the floor."

"What?"

"I'm looking at it right now. I think you dropped it by accident. Red lace? It looks a little wet—"

The door couldn't have opened faster. I would've laughed, except her face...

Dark circles covered under her bloodshot eyes. Sunken. Exhausted. Miserable. Her face look bonier, like she had lost a couple of pounds. Her hair was a long, frizzy mess, like she'd been tossing and turning in bed nonstop. In oversized, gray t-shirt and pajama bottoms.

Behind her, the room was pitch dark despite the bright daytime.

She did not deserve this. Did not deserve to punish herself and suffer. Did not deserve to be abandoned. Not with the thoughts that I was certain were consuming her mind.

Her gasp snapped me back to reality. She looked down at the bundled up, fuzzy pink blanket by my feet.

Inside it, was an adorable fawn. A little, brown-furred creature with white spots. It twitched its button nose at Clara, poking its head out with doe-eyed curiosity.

"Oh my God..." Her voice came out breathless, in awe.

Then something happened that struck my chest like an arrow.

She smiled.

Not a snarky one. Not a hateful one. Not a fake one. A genuine, unfiltered, emotional smile that broke across her face and God, it was fucking beautiful and so unexpected...

"Um..." I rubbed the back of my neck, heat spreading to my face as she kneeled to observe the creature. "D-do you like it?"

"What the hell is it doing here?" She kept her amazed gaze on it, like she was scared it would disappear if she looked away.

"There's plenty in Mexico. Just plucked it out of the beach. They love coconuts."

She gave me a half-hearted glare.

But the fawn stole her attention again. It wobbled on its slender legs and stepped past her, into the room.

"Oh my God..." Clara whispered to herself.

I used her distraction to invite myself in. The first thing I did was use my good arm to open the blinds. Light filtered on the walnut floor, specks of dust floating in the air.

The fawn observed the area with cautious curiosity, twitching one of its triangle-shaped, fluffy ears.

"Want to help me feed it?" I pulled out a bottle of warm milk that Niko brought from the shelter from my sweat's pocket.

Clara furrowed her brows, scoffing out a laugh. "Why do you have that?"

"I'm switching careers to a professional fawn nanny. Why? You don't think I can pull it off?"

"Seriously."

"Come on, it's hungry. I only have one hand. You know you want to."

"You have three other people in this house to help you." She crossed her arms self-consciously. Suddenly aware that I was here.

In her space. Seeing the state that she was in. The state of the room, with cluttered clothes and tissues everywhere. The rumbled sheets on the bed told me she'd been a zombie, struggling to escape from reality and failing.

"I want you to help me."

Tears lined her lower lash line. "I, uh...I'm not..."

She looked away. I took a step closer, but stopped myself halfway. The last thing I wanted was for her to push me away, which made zero sense. The rational part of me tried to remind me who she was. Who I was. What we were. But all I saw was a girl. A girl that was hurt and maybe...maybe I had the power to lift some of that pain. I had to try, at least.

Lowering on the floor, I crossed my legs and wiggled the bottle toward the fawn.

"Come here, buddy. You hungry? You want some milk?"

To my surprise, it recognized the bottle and wiggled it's cotton-white tail.

"Sit next to me. Now, now, now. Hurry," I said to Clara, not taking my eyes away from the fawn. "I need you to cradle her neck gently. Support the head. They're supposed to be fed in a natural nursing position."

Her compassion won. She mimicked my crossed-leg position beside me. "How the fuck do you know that?"

"I know everything." Niko told me. "Now do as I say before the poor thing starves. Come on."

"Um, okay..." Awkwardly, she followed my instructions. She was so gentle not to frighten or hurt the animal that the fawn melted under her touch. Didn't even hesitate.

I brought the bottle close to its mouth and watched in amazement as it flicked its tongue for a little taste-test, then latched onto it for dear life.

Clara chuckled in disbelief. "What the hell..."

"What the hell indeed."

This was the strangest, cutest thing I'd ever done with a woman. The fact that this little thing trusted us...depended on us...maybe life wasn't so bad, when it was filled with moments like this.

Our eyes connected, but the brief light that was shining in her earlier once again dimmed.

She directed her focus back on the animal, her lips tugging downward.

I tried to distract her. "So apparently, some deers abandon their kids when they're little and refuse to feed them. So shelters will take the fawns and bottle-feed them, until they're ready to go back to the wilderness and survive on their own."

"How do you just refuse to feed your baby?" She wondered more to herself.

"I have no idea. You brought it into this world. You're responsible for its well-being and safety. I guess, not everyone is meant to be a parent."

Like her father. Like her mom. She was raised by cruel people. Some people had it worse, of course. She was raised in wealth. She had a high education and a lot of the luxury that millions only dreamed about. But I doubted she'd been raised with warmth and love.

She didn't have any bridesmaids for her wedding. I didn't think she really had any friends. Her dad had sent her to boarding school throughout childhood. Maybe the long distance made it difficult. And she had no siblings. Cousins. But they lived far too. So she was all alone. Even though she surrounded herself with people. It was always shallow. Fake. Lonely, I bet.

It didn't take long for the fawn to finish. By the time the bottle was empty, it had fallen asleep. Doe-eyes closed, lashes grazing its cheeks. Small body curled into itself, velvety ears pulled back.

I draped the blanket over it before standing up. Clara crossed her arms around herself, the self-conscious uncertainty back on her features.

"Are you leaving it here?"

"Do you mind? I figured, we should keep it while we're stuck here. There's nothing else to do."

Her eyebrows furrowed further. "Why in my room?"

"Everyone else is allergic to it."

She gave me an unamused look. "Everyone else is allergic to deers?"

"Severely. Their faces blow up. They get rashes everywhere. On their faces, their arms, ass crack. It's bad. Disgusting. Trust me."

She shook her head, as if pushing away the hint of amusement in the corner of her lip.

"Like I said, you're a walking contradiction." Her voice was so quiet, I hardly heard it.

But it still sped up my heartbeat. "I just..."

My hesitation made her look up. And something in her gaze shattered, the wall of emotions she'd been fighting to hold back. Agony and guilt and despair that was far too raw to touch, that would only hurt more if I dared to talk about it.

"You should eat too." I blurted out. Cleared my throat when her brows rose in surprise. "I mean, you should eat. So you have the energy to take care of the fawn. I'm just so worried about it, as a future professional fawn nanny."

She sighed, playing along. "Right."

"And the thing needs sunlight. So maybe keep the blinds open. Fresh air wouldn't hurt either."

"Right. Yeah, it makes sense." Her shoulders softened as she stared at the animal. "I'll take care of it, since you know, you're injured."

I released the air that I didn't even know I was holding.

"Good."

This. This felt like an accomplishment. A meaningful one. Not for scheming, not for revenge, not rooted in hatred and tension. But...something softer and far, far more terrifying.

A/N
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