Chapter 34

The next week felt like it went by on fast forward. We got settled into our dorm rooms and went to orientation, as well as our first week of classes. Tess and I spent free time wandering the campus, getting to know everything. We made friends - like Willow, the girl who sat in front of me my writing class. She lived in our dorm and basically told everyone her door was always open. It literally was. And Kya, who was a local. She invited us to her parents house for dinner, whenever we wanted. It didn't take long before I realized how good I felt there, as a college student. I didn't have to feel like the girl with the broken family anymore. Or the girl who always had to hold it all together. I didn't have to tell people that my mom had been divorced twice or that my sister was pregnant. Most importantly, no one had to know that I'd fallen in love that summer.

The Sunday after our first week of classes, I was sitting on my bed in my dorm room, Tess right beside me. She was reading out of a massive textbook and I was just on Instagram, when my phone rang.

"My dad," I told Tess, unsure about answering. I hadn't talked to him since I'd hung up on him, the day he called to ask about Mateo and I.

Tess motioned that I should answer, so I did.

"Hello?"

"El, honey, how are you?" His deep voice boomed into my ear.

"I'm good," I said quickly. "Um, at college."

"Yes, that's great. How's everything?" he asked.

"It's good. Um, I mean, it's really great."

"I'm so happy to hear that. I can't believe you're old enough to be in college," he went on.

I heard a TV on in the background where he was. I pictured his house. And all the time I'd spent in it with Mateo.

"Yeah, well..." I let my voice trail off.

"El, I was hoping to come see you? This week, maybe-"

"Oh?" This surprised me. "Uh."

"We're closer in location now that we've been in a few years. You're, what, an hour away?"

I swallowed hard. "Yeah, a bit more than an hour."

"I just... I'd love to see you regularly, you know? And Jenna, too," he went on.

"Dad, it's..."

"I missed you so much, the past few years, Elena. I won't let anything come between us, now." He sounded so sure of this.

Hearing him say this made me feel more loved than I had felt in a long time. He hadn't expressed how hard being away from me all those years had been. Until now. It had been incredibly hard for me, too.

"Okay, yes," I told him.

"Yes?"

"How's tomorrow? My last class is done at 2P.M."

"I can be there at 4."

The air was already getting cooler that week and it felt like fall, suddenly. September had arrived quickly, throwing me right into my new life as a college student.

But seeing my dad as I walked into the coffee shop that afternoon, brought me right back to reality. Seeing him didn't make me nervous, but not knowing what he would say sure did. I'd left my hair down and pulled on my MS hoodie before leaving the dorm to drive to the coffee shop.

"You look so good," he smiled, hugging me. "It's wild that last I saw you, you were still -"

"Yeah, that was a weird time." I pulled out the chair across from him and sat down. It smelled really good in the cafe, making me hungry already.

"Things have been good with your mom, and Paige?" he asked, pushing a plate with three soft chocolate chip cookies towards me.

I picked one up right away. "Yeah, things are fine. I'm glad to be here, though. I think the time apart from them will be good for us."

He nodded, then sipped his coffee. "Do you need anything? I mean, I could get you... whatever."

"Um, no. I'm good, actually. But thank you," I said, pulling the coffee he'd gotten for me closer.

"Jenna wanted to come, but she had to work late -"

"Next time."

"Yeah, yes, of course," he smiled.

I was still thrown off that he hadn't mentioned Mateo yet. Was he planning to?

"These are good," I said, biting into a second cookie.

My dad smiled, his eyebrows raising and falling again. "Thanks for meeting me."

"Dad, of course," I replied.

"So, I did want to talk to you about..." he let his voice trail off.

I waited an extra minute, but decided just to get it out of the way. "It's over. Whatever it was. Okay?"

"Wait, what's over?" he asked.

"Mateo and I? I ended it."

"Oh, El. I'm sorry. I really wanted to tell you... even on the phone last week... that Jenna and I were okay with it."

I shook my head quickly. "Dad, can we not..."

"I had an idea that you two were... flirting? Or whatever you kids call it now," he laughed, even though I made it obvious I didn't want to talk about this. "I didn't expect it, of course, before you came for the wedding. I never thought you and Mateo would... but-"

"Dad, this is awkward."

"Honey, we're both adults," he smiled. "Mateo and you may be step siblings, but... you're not family. You're not related, we know that. And honestly, he is the best guy I could imagine to be with my little girl."

"Still... so very awkward," I said, taking in a breath.

"Why didn't you want me to know?" he asked. He sort of looked hurt, now.

"Dad, besides the fact that I've never talked to you about guys, or anything... we thought you and Jenna would freak out." I sipped the coffee, looking at my hands.

"Oh. Well, honestly we were only concerned because of how we found out."

"That's why I ended it," I admitted. "I can't believe he got drunk and told you..."

My dad was quiet for a minute, finishing his coffee. I finished the second cookie and continued sipping my coffee. Everything felt weird, but it was still nice just being there with him.

"Mateo was hurting, Elena. Keeping in that secret was killing him... he was sad and you were gone and..." His voice was low. "He shouldn't have told us that way, I agree, but -"

"Dad, I really don't want to do this right now, okay? Can we just..." I motioned at the table, the coffee, the cookie on the plate.

"Right, okay. I won't bring it up again," he finished, and I hoped he meant that.

I hugged him, hard, before watching him get into his SUV, half an hour later. I kept replaying his words over and over in my head as I drove back to the dorm.

We are okay with it.

I can't think of a better guy for you.

The problem was, neither could I.