Disclaimer: All Fairy Tail Characters Belong To Hiro Mashima

A/N I have received some negative comments on Gray's character so I decided to add a little bit more to his headspace in the this chapter so that his change of heart does not seem quite so sudden. Hopefully that will help a little.

Chapter 3

Gray sat in one of the plush seats of the private plane that was taking him and Lisanna to Tokyo. He couldn't believe he was once again on a plane mere hours after arriving from his disastrous trip to Germany but he had known he might never get this chance again so he had decided to take Lisanna up on her offer before he chickened out.

He was on his way to finally see the man that he had waited to hear from for so many years and he was rather nervous as to how the whole thing was going to play out. Lisanna had assured him that he and Natsu would have the house to themselves as she was going to go stay with Bickslow and for this Gray was glad. He wasn't sure if he could do what he planned with an audience. He managed to sleep for most of the 13 hour flight as he was still jet lagged from his previous trip and outside of some polite conversation Lisanna left him alone, perhaps sensing that he needed some time to sort out his feelings.

Once they had landed she had called Natsu to make sure he was home. Natsu and Lisanna lived in a penthouse in a building in Azabu, an expensive suburb in Tokyo. Lisanna had the driver drop them off there and asked him to wait for her to come back out. She got Gray through the building's security, put him in the elevator and used her key to give him access to their apartment. She wished him luck and smiled as the elevator doors closed, happy that she had been able to do something for her friend/husband. She had always been a romantic and she had all sorts of visions in her head of how their reunion would go. She got back in the car and headed to Bickslow's hotel.

The elevator doors opened inside of the apartment itself which was large and tastefully decorated. Gray stepped out and walked behind the elevator. He wanted to catch a glimpse of Natsu before he had to speak to him. He did not have long to wait. Natsu came out of a room and headed towards the elevator doors looking around for his wife.

'Lis? Where are you?" Natsu called out, "Did you have a nice trip?". He seemed surprised when he didn't get an answer. "Lisanna?"

From behind the elevator column, Gray let himself really look at Natsu. He looked just as handsome as he remembered, although he was thinner. The confidence and joy that he had always exuded was gone, replaced by a hollowness that tore at Gray's heart. He wished that things could have been different, he rather liked to think that the two of them could have made each other happy. He realized that it didn't really matter anymore because out of all the myriad of emotions that he was feeling at seeing Natsu again the one that stood out the most was anger. He was actually surprised by just how much anger he still felt. He stepped out from behind the elevator where Natsu could see him.

"Gray?" a soft accented voice that he could still recognize anywhere called out in surprise. "Is that really you?"

"Yeah, it's me." Gray replied as he hardened his heart against the hope and longing that he saw on Natsu's face .

"But how?" Natsu asked, shocked to see someone he thought he would never see again.

"Your wife hired a private investigator to find me and then flew to Boston to talk me into coming to see you. She snuck me in here to surprise you." Gray said. "She seems to be under the impression that you're in love with me."

Natsu stared at him sensing the anger that was hiding behind the civil words.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" Gray asked, "Because I have waited for 5 years for you to say something to me."

"I'm sorry." Natsu said looking into Gray's eyes.

"You're sorry? That's it?" Gray yelled and punched Natsu in the jaw, "What the hell, Natsu!"

"Of course not, I have a lot more I want to say." Natsu said as he rubbed his cheek but made no move to retaliate, "But what would be the point? I can already see it's too late. I never meant to hurt you, Gray. You have to believe me, I never wanted to hurt you."

Gray pushed Natsu up against a wall roughly as he laughed mirthlessly, "That's rich, you want me to believe you?"

"I did believe in you. That first week I let myself believe you were going to show up at my door. I'd even planned out what I was going to do. I was going to beat the crap out of you for leaving me like that and then I thought we would have amazing make up sex after. But you never came."

Gray laughed bitterly. "I would have been satisfied with anything you know, a phone call, an email, hell I would have even taken a postcard. Anything that showed that you cared for me just a little. That you felt bad for leaving me after what was arguably the happiest night of my life."

"But you never did, did you? Care for me, I mean. I was going to make my move that night. Did you know that? That's why I asked you out, but you beat me to it and I was so happy. The guy I had been in love with all that time, liked me back." Gray said softly although the tone of his voice quickly escalated back up to anger. "But then you left me there without even a note or a way to get in touch with you. I had to learn you had left from the security people at your apartment. Do you have any idea how that made me feel?"

"If you had told me what was happening that night I probably would have still slept with you, but it would have been my decision. I would have understood what I was getting myself into."

Natsu heard the pain inherent in Gray's voice and tried to interrupt, to say something that could express how much he regretted his actions. "Gray, I--"

"NO! It's too late now. I came here for one reason. Here," Gray took off the necklace that he had held on to all this time and tried to give it back to its owner. "you forgot this when you left." When Natsu would not take it he placed it on a nearby table.

"I don't know what you were trying to do when you left it with me but I don't think you ever really understood it's meaning and I can't wear it anymore. I'm moving on Natsu, I deserve someone better than you."

"You're right. You do deserve someone better than me. You always did." Natsu said as he looked at Gray sadly. He opened his mouth to say more but stopped.

Both men startled as the elevator doors opened to reveal Lisanna and a tall man who Gray assumed must be Bickslow.

"Hey Natsu! Are you decent? Did you like your surprise?" Lisanna asked excitedly. "I thought we could all go out to lunch to celebrate."

"I did, I can't believe you found him for me, Lis. Thank you." Natsu hugged her and attempted to smile for her, understanding how much work she had put into trying to cheer him up. "Do you guys mind going without me? I'm feeling a bit tired."

"Hey Bickslow." Natsu said as he shook the tall man's hand. He gestured towards Gray and introduced him. "This is Gray. Have a nice lunch! Excuse me."

Natsu grabbed his necklace and disappeared into one of the apartment's many rooms and closed the door behind him. Lisanna stared after him in confusion and then turned to Gray.

"What did you say to him?" Lisanna asked Gray with a menacing tone that seemed quite uncharacteristic for such a delicate looking girl.

Gray wasn't sure what to say, he knew he had made it seem like he was coming to reconcile with Natsu but in all honesty he hadn't been entirely sure of his intentions himself. He just knew that it was his chance to get closure and he was going to take it.

"You lied to me." Lisanna was beyond angry, "This was supposed to cheer him up not make him worse. Don't you think he's been through enough?"

Gray looked at her in surprise. "Haven't I?"

"Oh, boohoo. The guy you were in love with loved you so much that when he found out he would be forced to go home and get married one year early he couldn't live with the idea of never being with you. Yes, he should have said something before he left. He felt terrible about it. But you know what? You have no idea what he's been through. His mother and --"

"Lis" Bickslow interrupted with a warning in his voice. "Stop. Let's go out to lunch. How about some sushi? Maybe we can show Gray around Tokyo for a little bit."

"No, I'll stay with Natsu." Lisanna said as she continued to glare at Gray.

"Lis, he wants to be alone, just let him be." Bickslow urged "He knows you care, that's enough. If you stay he's only going to be more upset."

Lisanna's resolve wilted. She knew Bickslow was right. She looked at the closed door worriedly and forced herself to leave the apartment with the other two men. Bickslow tried to keep up a conversation with Gray knowing that Lisanna was no longer in the mood to be hospitable.

Natsu waited for them to leave and went into his bedroom to pack a bag. Once he was ready he sat down at his desk and wrote two letters, one for Lisanna and one for Gray. Natsu put Lisanna's letter in an envelope and wrote her name on it. He took his wedding ring off and put it on top of the divorce papers he'd received from the lawyer and had already signed. He got another envelope out, placed the second letter inside along with one of his business cards and wrote Gray's name on it. He grabbed everything and put the envelopes on the coffee table in the living room where he thought they would be found along with the ring, the necklace and the divorce papers. He entered the elevator and made his way down to the parking garage. When the others returned he was long gone.

After a rather uncomfortable lunch, Lisanna and Bickslow had taken Gray sightseeing. He tried to feign interest in the places they were showing him but his mind was elsewhere. He was so confused. He had done it, he had finally gotten to talk to Natsu and told him everything he had been holding in since Natsu had left him all those years ago. So why did he still feel so unhappy? Why was it that he wanted to go back? Now that he had seen him, Gray realized he didn't want to let go of him again.

He kept thinking about that hollowness that Natsu had already exuded even before he had seen Gray and although he was certain that whatever it was had nothing to do with him, he didn't like it and he also didn't like that his outburst had probably made it worse.

He wondered what could have happened to Natsu to cause him to look that way and with some dismay realized that in all this time he had never given much thought to Natsu himself and why he'd felt the need to leave the way he did or how his situation would have affected him over the years. Gray had to admit that although his own feelings had been valid, maybe he had been a little selfish as well.

Lisanna and Bickslow finally suggested they return to the house, and Gray did not argue. The drive back to the apartment was quiet, all three of the passengers lost in their own thoughts. They arrived quickly and rode the elevator up to the penthouse.

Lisanna knew Natsu was gone from the moment she walked out of the elevator. The house just felt empty.

She saw his wedding ring on the table as well as the divorce papers.

"He's gone." Lisanna told the others and pointed them to the table. She was glad to finally have her freedom but a part of her felt terrible for leaving Natsu alone to deal with his grief. She at least had Bickslow to help her through it. They would be leaving for California at the end of the week and she had desperately hoped that Gray would be there for Natsu.

She opened her letter and began to cry as she read it


Lis,

I'm really touched that you set out to find Gray for me. I know your intentions were good and I'm sorry things didn't work out the way you'd hoped. Please don't blame him, he has every right to feel the way he does. I am the one to blame, I was selfish and a coward.

I signed the divorce papers, you're a free woman as soon as you sign them. Please take anything you want from the house. You are welcome to take all the baby things, although I'll understand if you don't want them. I'll make sure they get a good home. I wish you a happy life with Bickslow, he's a great guy. Tell him to treat you right or he'll have me to deal with, California is only a plane ride away ;).

You don't have to worry about me anymore, I'll be fine! I know neither one of us wanted this but I want you to know that if I had to be married to anyone, I'm glad it was you. You were a wonderful wife and mother and in my own way I loved you very much.

I'm going to my dad's house for a little while to clear my head, I promise I'll call you guys up the minute I return. Please make sure Gray gets back to Boston safely. Thank you for everything you've done for me.

With Love,

Natsu

Bickslow wrapped his girlfriend up in a hug and tried to console her. He knew that it was going to be difficult for her to let go of Natsu. He was a good guy, Bickslow found that for as much as he'd wanted to hate Natsu in the beginning, he'd never been able to. He saw the other letter and turned towards Gray and said, "He left one for you too."

Gray walked towards the coffee table and looked at the letter nervously, not sure whether he wanted to read it or not. He opened the envelope, figuring it would be stupid of him to not read the letter after how much he had complained about being left in the dark last time. He took out the letter and began to read.

Gray,

I fell in love with you probably the first week I met you, but I knew I couldn't do anything about it. I knew that if I was lucky enough to have you feel the same way, I would have to give you up at some point and I didn't think I could do that. I had everything in the fucking world, except the one thing I wanted. Freedom. I had to marry Lisanna, there was no way around it. I think part of me always hoped that if I did everything he asked, my father would somehow see how miserable I was and change his mind about the marriage but he never did.

I should have stayed home that night but I didn't want to leave without seeing you one last time. I never planned for anything to happen but then I saw the way you stared at me when I picked you up and I just....that's the first time I realized that you felt the same way about me and I wanted to feel what it would have been like before my freedom was taken away. I know it was selfish, I should have told you what was happening but I didn't want to think about my situation anymore. There was nothing I could do to change it, from the next day on my life would no longer be my own but that night, that night was mine to do with as I pleased. It was the happiest night of my life. You have no idea how many times I think about it, not just the sex but everything about it. Not a day went by that I did not think of you. I'm sad to see how much anger you still have towards me but it's no more than I deserve and I know that.

I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you, You're right, you do deserve better than me. Everything you said about me was true, save one. I am very well aware of what that necklace means. It was part of my selfishness that you wear it so that a part of me would always live happy with you. I wish I had been brave enough to tell you everything but I wasn't. I can't change that now. I leave the necklace behind, there's no one else I would like to give it to. Feel free to do with it what you wish. I enjoyed all the time we spent together as friends and I am happy that I got to see you again. I have asked Lisanna to make sure you get back home safely.

I don't want to make the same mistake twice so I've enclosed one of my business cards. You can always reach me at any of the numbers or email listed on it. I would like to try to be friends again but I understand if you'd rather not. I missed you a lot all these years. Our talks, our arguments, hell I even missed our stupid fist fights. I've never met anyone else quite like you. Please say hi to Lucy and Loke for me if you can.

Goodbye,

Natsu

Gray read the letter a few times before putting it back down on the coffee table. He closed his eyes for a moment, he didn't want the others to see his expression while he mulled over the contents of the letter. It contained everything he had wanted to know and now he had to ask himself whether it changed anything. Gray felt the business card in his hand and smiled. It was a start.

Natsu had missed him and wanted to be friends again. Gray felt the same, he might even still harbor feelings for him but that was not a bridge he was ready or willing to cross yet. For now, he just wanted to talk with his friend and try to rebuild what they used to have before Natsu's abrupt departure. He tuned back in to the conversation once he had made the decision to stick around for a few days.

"Bickslow, he shouldn't be alone right now." Lisanna was saying with concern. "He's writing goodbye letters. That can't be good."

"Lis, he's just overwhelmed and sad." Bickslow frowned, he didn't want to say anything that would worry his girlfriend further but he was a bit concerned as well. "He just needs time to himself."

"Please, I'm all he has left." Lisanna said as she tried to convince her boyfriend that they needed to go after Natsu.

"That's not true." Gray spoke up . "He's got me too."

"Now you care?!" Lisanna said angrily. "Your outburst might be what pushes him over the edge!"

"I've always cared, Lisanna, I was just mad at him." Gray said in earnest and asked the question that was now weighing on his mind. "Why is he like this? It's not just because of me. He already looked defeated before he saw me, and he didn't even retaliate when I punched him. That's not like him at all. I agree with you, I think we should go find him."

They headed out to Igneel's house. In the car, Lisanna caught Gray up on all the things that had happened since Igneel had died.

o-o

Natsu stood on the small deck of the house. He watched the waves crash into the sand and let his mind wander back to the days when he and his brother Zeref used to play on that beach. They would spend hours swimming, making sand castles, chasing each other or looking for seashells and sand dollars under their mother's watchful eye. If he closed his eyes he could almost see it. A bittersweet smile erupted on his face when he thought of his older brother.

Even though it was small Natsu had always loved this house, it was the one place he could remember where his family had been happy. His mother and brother had been alive and his father had not been obsessed with work. His father had wanted to sell it but Natsu had managed to talk him out of it. He had hoped to spend vacations here with his own family when his son was older but now that day would never come. He wondered what his son would have been like when he was older, would he have been stubborn and excitable like him or maybe sweet and cheerful like Lisanna? He knew he had to stop doing this, the more he allowed himself this type of fantasy the more depressed he got. He needed to let him go but it was so hard, it felt like a betrayal. He didn't want to forget him.

There was a knock on the front door and Natsu sighed knowing he shouldn't have told Lisanna where he was going, He made his way to the door somewhat annoyed at being interrupted.

"Lis, I appreciate you coming out to check up on me but I told you I would call you when I got back." Natsu said as he opened the door. To his surprise he saw Gray standing there . His expression was unsure but he entered the house before Natsu could close the door on him.

"Gray? What are you doing here?" Natsu asked, "I thought you'd be at the airport by now."

"I would have been here sooner but it turns out your dad had a lot of houses and it took Lisanna a while to remember this one."

"What do you want?" Natsu asked confused. "You made your feelings quite clear."

"Look, I know this is awkward but I'm still your friend and something is obviously wrong. Why don't you tell me what it is? Maybe we can start there and try to make our way back."

"Why are you here?" Natsu was glad to see him but he was in no mood to argue.

"Your letter. Well that and Lisanna can be pretty damn scary when it comes to you. I thought she was going to kill me when you left me alone with her and Bickslow."

Natsu gave him a small smile. "She's my oldest friend, she thinks it's her job to take care of me. Thanks for stopping by but there's really nothing anyone can do. I just have to grieve."

"What's so special about this house?" Gray asked. He couldn't help but notice how different it was to all the others he had already looked through with Lisanna and Bickslow. "No offense but it seems a lot smaller than all the other ones."

"This was the house where I grew up." Natsu replied simply. "I lived here with my mother, father and older brother."

"You have a brother? I don't think you ever mentioned him."

"I wouldn't have, he died when I was five. My mother died soon after and then it was just me and my dad." Natsu talked, a faraway look in his eyes. He made his way back out to the deck and Gray followed him out. He stood next to Natsu and just let him talk.

"My dad couldn't live in this house anymore, I guess it was too painful to live with their memories. So he and I moved closer to the city. Soon after his business started to take off and then he was mostly gone too. He was always away on business. I guess it gave him something else to think about. Through all his hard work we became rather wealthy and moved to Tokyo. My aunt moved in with us to take care of me. My dad wasn't a bad guy and he did love me. I just reminded him of them I think. When I finally got the nerve to tell him I was gay he took it pretty well, even if he wasn't willing to undo the marriage arrangement. I was still the only son and I had the responsibility to provide an heir. It was his idea for me to study abroad, I think he figured I would get the gayness out of my system or something. He even bought me an apartment so I could be discreet." Natsu laughed affectionately at that. "He could be a thoughtful old bastard when he wanted to be."

"Of course that plan broke the window after I met you. There was no one else for me after that. You have no idea how much Lisanna hounded me to ask you out." Natsu chuckled. "She was already dating Bickslow and I think she felt guilty that I was alone."

Gray smiled at Natsu's misuse of the phrase. He'd missed hearing him mangle the English language.

"Why didn't you just say no to the marriage?" Gray asked.

"How could I? I was all he had left." Natsu exclaimed. "The best I could do was to get it postponed until we finished college."

"You know it's funny, I understand him so much better now that I've lost everything too. I feel so empty."

"What are you talking about? You haven't lost everything."

"I lost my brother, my mother, my father and my son. Lisanna is one step closer to moving away and now that you've made it clear that you want nothing to do with me that's done too. I don't care about the business, I always hated it. All it ever did was take my dad away from me. I don't even care about the money. All I want is to feel like I did when we all lived here, even if only for a few minutes."

Silent tears fell on his cheeks and Gray grabbed him and held him as he cried. "I miss him so much, Gray."

Gray ran his fingers through Natsu's hair and rubbed his back. "I'm sorry, Lisanna told me about your son. I can't even imagine how that must feel."

Gray took a deep breath and looked Natsu in the eyes. "You haven't lost me, Natsu. I'm still here." He kissed Natsu's lips gently.

Natsu pushed him away. "The last thing I need from you is pity."

Gray grunted in frustration. "It's not pity. Look, I was angry and hurt! I had a lot of things that I had bottled up for the last five years that I needed to get off my chest, but you didn't help matters either. Until I read that letter I had no idea what was going through your head. The truth is I have tried to be with other people but I always break it off before it gets anywhere because.... well, because they're not you. I think I understand the situation you were in better now, and while you're still an asshole for leaving the way you did, I get it. I forgive you, Natsu. I'd like to be friends again."

"You don't want me now, Gray. I'm no good to anyone, I'm broken." Natsu said honestly.

"Why don't you let me decide what I want  for once." Gray chided. "I know you're broken, Natsu, but I'm not exactly whole myself these days. Why can't we fix each other?"

"Let's start small, why don't we go get some takeout and you can tell me all about him. What was his name?"

Natsu nodded and as they made their way towards his car he began to talk.

"His name was Hiroyuki, it means lots of happiness in Japanese. We named him that because that's how he made us feel," Natsu told him. "We called him Yuki."

THE END

A//N I know it's not a fluffy ending, but I like it and I hope you do too. Silver I think I owe you another story. This one did not at all come out the way I intended for you. I don't know what happened. I hope you at least like it.