The surgery felt like it took days, but at least one kind nurse came to keep me posted every half hour. Every time she came out I hoped that she was going to tell me that my mom was done. There was one point where she didn't come out for two hours and I knew that that was a bad sign. When she finally came back she just told me that there was a complication, but the surgeons had been able to solve it. I then thanked her and she went back to the room. The surgery took fourteen hours total. I stayed awake for all of it.

The nurse came back in, "Your mom is finally out of surgery and it seemed like she did great! We will know more when she wakes up."

I know I should have been thrilled, but all I could ask was, "Did you get it all?"

"Unfortunately, the tumor is not completely gone. It has wrapped itself around many of her nerves and if we accidently took out one of those, more serious complications could arise."

"Meaning?"

"Her brain may have stopped working properly."

I gave a slight smile, but I was so worried that I felt I was going to be sick. She offered if I would like to see my mom and of course I said yes. When I got there she was laying on a bed with a tube in her throat and multiple machines connected to her and beeping. "What is the tube for?" I was pretty sure I knew, but I didn't expect to see one sticking out of her throat.

"It is to help her breathe. Surgery takes quite a toll on the body and we just have to give it a little help until she can breathe on her own again."

"How long will it take for her to wake up?"

"Most patients wake up in a couple of hours, but I'd say that she could wake up anywhere between tonight and next week."

"Next week?"

"Brain surgery is hard and..."

"I know, I know, it takes a toll on the body." She gave a polite smile, but I could tell she was getting slightly annoyed.

"I'll let you be alone then, unless you need anything else."

"No, I'm fine, thanks." She left us alone.

I didn't get much sleep that night. I was afraid that when I did she would wake up or something worse. I wanted to keep a close eye on her. Then my phone rang. I didn't want to pick it up, but I decided that it might be important. "Hello?"

"Em, is everything alright? You didn't call." It was Austin.

"That's right, I'm sorry. I guess I just forgot." I was so busy throughout the day that I really did just forget to call.

"Are you okay?"

"Yea, I'm okay. It's just that they took my mom in for her surgery and she hasn't woken up yet. I've been afraid to leave." I yawned.

"Is she alright? Do you need me to come home? I can be there in a couple of hours." It was nice that he was so concerned about my mom.

"I think she's okay. The doctors said that they would know more when she woke up. Just enjoy your tour." I looked back at my mom, she was still asleep.

"Okay, but you better keep me updated. Call the second she wakes up."

"I will."

"Oh, and, Em."

"Yes?"

"I miss you."

"I miss you too." I heard someone in the background tell him to stop talking to his girlfriend. I think it was Marty. I guess they had a show tonight.

"I got to go. Love you!" He hung up and I went back to my mom's side. I pulled up a chair and at some point I drifted off to sleep.

....

Six days had passed since my mother's surgery and she still hadn't woken up. Austin told me that she was just catching up on some needed sleep, but her doctors were starting to worry. They kept telling me to wait and be patient, but they were checking on her every five minutes. Sometimes I saw interns outside of the room just watching. I guess we were the best gossip of the week.

Just when I was about to give up I saw movement in her eyes. They had taken out the tube a few days before so that when she finally opened her eyes and took in her surroundings she wasn't choking on a giant tube. "How did it go, Emily?" Her voice was soft and raspy.

I couldn't help but smile, "They think it went well. They needed to see how you were when you woke up." I held onto her hand.

"Am I tumor free?" She sounded so hopeful.

"I'd better let the doctors fill you in."

"So it didn't work?" She knew me so well.

"Not completely, but most of it was removed, just not all of it. I'll grab your doctor and then Austin wanted to know the second you wake up."

"Just call him now; I want to tell him myself." She sounded so tired, so I thought that one quick phone call was all she needed before she could go back to sleep.

I dialed his number, "How is she doing, Em?"

"I'm alright, thanks for checking in on me." She was smiling.

"Mrs. Cosden! You're awake."

"Yes I am, but enough about me, how has your tour been?" It was weird that even though she had just woken up from a major surgery she was still acting like a mother.

"You remembered!" That was a good sign, "It's going pretty well, so far we have performed in six states and we are going to visit thirty."

"Well, that sounds exciting. I'd better let you go now, Em, has to tell my doctor that I am awake."

"Okay, Mrs. Cosden, I'm glad you are awake and talking. Even though I can't see you I know that you look as beautiful as ever."

"Thank you, Austin." He always knew what to say to draw a smile from anyone.

I took the phone back, "Don't go just yet, Austin. Mom, I'll be right back, okay?" she nodded and I left the room. "So your tour's been going well?" I asked as I shut the door behind me.

"Yes, and, Em, you are going to be okay. Your mom is awake, most of her tumor is gone, and you are going to start school soon."

"The last part is not that great." I went to the front desk and asked them to call the doctor.

"I wouldn't know, I have never been to high school. Has Sophie visited much?"

"A couple of times, but she has been busy shopping and getting ready to go back to school. She has been getting double the stuff so that I'm covered too. You really have never been to high school?"

"No, why? Is it fun?"

"No, I think you dodged a bullet, but it is an experience you will definitely never forget." The nurse at the front said that the doctor was already in my mom's room, so I headed back down the hallway.

"I guess I should join you sometime."

"I think I would like that very much. I would love to see all the girls swarm around you." I said sarcastically.

"You're right; maybe I did dodge a bullet." Something wasn't right. Nurses and doctors were all running towards my mom's room. Not jogging, sprinting. I joined in. "Em, are you okay?" I guess he could hear me panting over the phone.

"I gotta go talk to you soon." I hung up when I got to my mother's room. She was seizing. All of the doctors were yelling at each other and trying to get her to stop.

"What went wrong?" I heard one ask another.

"I told you we shouldn't have done it. She could be reacting badly!"

"The surgery went perfectly, this shouldn't be happening!"

I couldn't hear any more of it. My mom could be dying. I took a step outside her room and crumpled to the floor. A nurse found me sitting there and took me to an empty room where I just broke down in tears.

"It's okay, Emily. Sometimes these things happen. You mom will be okay, it's just a little bump in the road. She is getting the best care possible and we are doing all that we can to help." the nurse wasn't helping, but I guess it's the thought that counts.

Only one question came into my mind, "Please tell me that you didn't just kill my mom."

"No, we didn't. If we didn't do the surgery she would have had a slow, painful, and very confusing death. This way she has more time, but if she doesn't make it, she will die in her sleep, which is the most peaceful way to go. She will be in no pain."

"How do you know?"

"How do I know what?"

"How do you know that it will be peaceful or that she won't be any pain? It's not like someone who died like that told you that it was the best way to die."

"We know because it puts the least amount of stress onto the body and she will not be dying from any external injuries which we know can be quite painful." She looked at me as if I had just asked the stupidest question ever.

"Can you just check on my mom, please? I want to know."

"Sure."

She came back a few minutes later and told me that she wasn't quite ready to wake up yet and her body just went into shock. She also said that it would take another week or so for her to wake up again. Just perfect, right when everything feels great, life dumps some more BS for me to deal with. I didn't know how I was going to tell Austin about this, but I called him anyway.

"Hey, Em! How's it going?" I heard cheers in the background.

"Are you on stage right now?"

"Yea totally. I asked them if they cared and they didn't. What did you need?"

"I just had some more news about the situation, but it can wait until after just call me when it's over. I love you."

I heard his shout "She loves me!" and the crowd exploded again. I couldn't stifle a chuckle.

"I'll see you when you get back. Call me soon, okay?"

"Of course, Love. I'll call you in about an hour. Bye." He hung up. It was going to be a crazy conversation when he called back, but I wanted him to enjoy his show, so it could wait.