Ashton

It has only been a bit over one month since Christina has been gone.    We've talked almost every day, but it's not the same. And now I'm going through this big thing - Oliver reappearing in my life- and it's hard to talk about it over the phone. I don't know how to tell her how I feel about everything because I don't even know.

My emotions are all over the place. My weekends are spent anticipating seeing Oliver again, wondering if he's going to stress me out even more than the week before. Wondering if he's going to bring up Tyson again. Hoping I can avoid him until this damn job is done.

Why did he say that he will find out what happened between Tyson and I? How does he not know? Did Tyson lie about why we broke up?

   No, Ashton. You can't talk shit about a dead man.

"How's the project coming along?" Christina asks me, a few days later.

It's Saturday. So far, she knows I'm working with Oliver and that he drunk texted me one night. I haven't talked about him much. I still haven't told her about Tyson and the fact that he died, just a few months ago. I don't even know why.  I need to tell her everything. I need to get it all off my chest.

"It's going well. We're on schedule to finish as planned," I tell her, leaving the rest out for now.

"You're being very serious about this topic," Christina laughs and then goes on. "How's working with Oliver? How's it been since he drunk texted you?"

"It's fine," I say quickly. My phone is propped up on my table and I'm sitting across from it, so she can see me. "No mention of it. It was obviously a mistake."

"I'm not so sure about that." My best friend has a mischievous look on her face.

"What do you mean?" I ask her right away.

Christina clears her throat. "You probably don't want to hear this, Ash, but I know Oliver had the hots for you, when you were with Tyson."

"What?"

Oh my god, no. Has she lost her mind?

"You were too blinded by your infatuation with Tyson to see it. But Oliver... he hung around so much just to see you," Christina goes on, as if this was common knowledge.

"You're crazy." I shake my head and roll my eyes at the same time.

"You two haven't talked about Tyson, at all?" she wants to know. "Like, it's not awkward? Since his brother broke your fucking heart?"

Shit.

"No," I lie.  I never lie to her and it feels so wrong, but I'm not ready to tell her about Tyson. I'm not ready to talk about any of this. "We talk about work stuff, that's it."

"You should have a real conversation with Oliver, Ash. It will likely make you feel better about everything."

"I don't think that's possible," I say quickly. "I just need to finish up the work and get him out of my life again."

Christina sighs and it's very dramatic. "I feel like there's some reason he ended up coming back into your life, a year later."

"No, it's not some crazy act of fate. It's just a coincidence." I say this right away and I mean it.

"I miss you," she says, changing the subject, after shrugging. Maybe she'll finally drop the conversation. "Oh! I'm coming home in two weeks."

"What!?" I yell, and almost choke on the water I was sipping.

"Yeah, surprise!" she says with a laugh. "I'm heading back on a flight, the Wednesday after next. Ben is finishing up the job and will deal with the townhouse and stuff and then come back a few days later."

"Yay! I can't wait to see you!" I say, smiling. "I mean, in person."

"Same." Christina sighs again. I can tell there's something she's not saying, but I let it go.

*

It's the start of week five of the Santos Project, which I'm now referring to it as. This is the longest running project I've done with the ad agency and I know that's because there was so much to do, from scratch. Angela has done her final sign off and is confident I will finish the job over the next week. The website is ready, the new logo and business cards have been printed. The video campaign is almost done. I love when project are wrapping up. I can finally see all the hard work paying off.

I see the look on Oliver's face. We're in the Monday morning meeting and he's silently asking me why I ignored his text on Saturday. He should know why. I made it clear I'm not interested in bringing up the past. Besides, this is the last full week of working together. We're ahead of schedule. Well, I am. His uncle has approved everything up until this point. The website is set to go live this afternoon. Everything else will be done by Friday and Oliver will be out of my hair.
   
   Now, sitting right across from me at the meeting room table, he's burning holes in me with his eyes. He knew I had the website under control. We talked about on Thursday. I knew his intentions were to talk about the past. So I left him on read.

"Candace, Ryan, your current project is on time?" Angela asks loudly, and I look over at Candace

She's an older woman who's been with the company since I was in high school. She's old school but good at her job. She works mostly with videos and commercials.

   "Yes," Ryan - who used to be my office buddy last year, until he moved down to commercials only- says quickly.

At the same time, Candace begins, "Ahead of schedule. Waiting on some info from the client, but we're good."

Angela nods in their direction and then turns to me. Her dark eyes look tired today. I don't know much about her besides that she's a badass boss and CEO of the company. She's been my direct boss since I've worked here. But I don't even know if she's married or has kids. We never talk about our personal lives.

"Ashton," she begins. I wish she'd turned her attention to Matt or anyone else in this meeting. "How's the big project coming along? Your end date is approaching."

I talked to her on Friday about it's she's just putting on an act for the meeting. It's annoying.

"It's going well," I say and nod.

   "Very well," Oliver agrees. Why is he even here? "Ahead of schedule and I must say, Ashton is working hard to get it done as quick as possible."

Was that a shot at me? What the hell is he doing?

Angela nods again and gives me a smile before turning away and focusing her attention on someone else. Soon, she's talking about the next job that is starting end of next week. We all will have different jobs to do, but mine will be design and costumer interaction. They think I'm best there. I generally agree, though sometimes it means speaking to clients who aren't really happy with us.

When the meeting comes to an end, I try to pack up and sneak down to my office without being seen. Oliver is talking with Matt and I turn my back and almost make it to the door before I hear someone behind me.

The hairs on my arms stand up because I know Oliver is following me out into the hallway and down towards my office. I don't even have to look over my shoulder to know it's him. He's quiet. Not drawing any attention to himself. When we're inside and the door is closed, I keep walking to the far side of my desk. I'm not afraid of him, but I'm nervous about what might come out of his mouth.

I drop my bag onto the desk and pull out my laptop. I'm pretty good at pretending to be distracted, so I just attempt to go on as if he's not there. I'm not going to be the first one to speak. I can't give him what he wants.

After a few awkward minutes, he starts. "You ignored my text on the weekend."

It's an accusation and I hate it.

"Yes." I say this easily.

   "Why?" he wants to know.

"I need to start work," I say, so I can hopefully get him out of here.

I'm not looking at him. I'm literally forcing my eyes to stay on my laptop screen. Looking at him will cause me to lose my composure. I know it.

"I'll go," he tells me because he's respectful like that.

But he doesn't go.

I look up, waiting. His eyes pierce mine again.

"You have a girlfriend," I say plainly.

He looks confused. "Uh. Yeah?"

"You asked me to dinner. But you have a girlfriend."

That's not why I ignored his text but it was part of the reason. He shouldn't have asked me to have dinner with him.

Oliver smiles and shakes his head. "Not like... a date. I meant... like... ugh. I just wanted to work on the -"

"The website's done. Going live today. So don't worry about that," I interrupt.

He swallows hard and nods. "Wonderful."

"Oliver. Why did you really want to see me on the weekend?" I find the courage to ask.

Now he looks like he's ready to run. "I want to talk to you, but not here. I'll let you get back to work."

All I wanted was for him to leave my office - and my life - and now that he's going, it feels wrong. The conversation isn't finished, but he's right. We can't do it here. I watch him leave before swallowing hard and plopping down into my chair.

This is going to be a long day.